A woman defines being single-ish as keeping emotional connection and intimacy while staying independent, not needing a partner to wash your clothes or cook. She wants a 50/50 partnership that's fun and conversational but without cohabitation or family plans, which she sees as different from friends with benefits because it still has real caring.
Chapters
Is there a difference between being single-ish and having a friend with benefits? Somebody was saying the other day that they thought that my desire to be single-ish was actually no more than just looking for a f-buddy. And that, you know, wasn't I like so many other people seeking that, you know, one grand love of my life? And I think there is a difference between being single-ish and having a friend with benefits. And single-ish is there's still some emotional involvement, there's still some caring feelings, all of that sort of thing, but without all of the neediness that often ends up being part of so many long-term relationships where one person is just so overly needy that it— they become really unattractive. And I think at our age, let's face it, we're all grown-ups, We should be able to wash our own clothes. We should be able to cook our own food. We should be able to basically look after ourselves so that we're not looking to the other person to fulfill some basic domestic task that we should be able to just do for ourselves. So when it comes to relationships, no, I don't want a guy who expects me to do all that shit, frankly. I want a nice, person who's gonna just step up to be a 50/50 in the partnership, but whom I don't have to live with, who I don't have to be— get all domestic with, and for whom I could have a nice fun time together, enjoy their company, enjoy being with them, having those nice conversations, those, you know, those interactions that do have intimacy, but without all the rubbish that comes with relationships that often are all involved with bringing up families on all that stuff, which I've done, and I'm all over that.
