Sex doesn't have to be spontaneous to work. Planning it, like scheduling Sunday afternoons together, lets couples relax, look forward to intimacy, and keep it alive over decades instead of watching it fade away.
Do you believe that sex should be planned or should it be spontaneous? I suspect like many people, when I was younger, I believed that sex should be spontaneous, that it should just happen. And you know, normally that was not how it worked. And as I've grown older, I've realized that if I don't plan it, it's just not going to happen. And in fact, planning it is part of the fun. Looking forward to meeting somebody, looking forward to seeing them, looking forward to spending time with them, knowing that it's going to be a really good time. There's going to be lots of pleasure and that I can just chill out and relax. And I think when you're in a long-term relationship, it's really important to plan it because I know it's one of the first things that when you get used to somebody can just disappear out of your relationship. And before you know it, you're not having sex at all. So, you know, spending Sunday afternoons, especially if you don't have kids around, just chilling out, having sex, having fun, not really with the goal all the time of having an orgasm, but just like enjoying the pleasure that comes from being intimate with somebody else when you don't have other things that are necessary to do in your life can just be such a fun way to spend some time together.
Why Sex Changes After Menopause (And Why That's Not a Bad Thing) | ft. Dr. Kelly Barron
Why Facesitting Is Trending Among Women: Power, Pleasure & Later-Life Intimacy
