A 62-year-old woman describes how she cultivates sexual desire through deliberate preparation: showering, shaving, red lipstick, high heels, no underwear. Arousal doesn't just happen for her; it requires the ritual. Feeling sexy comes first, then everything else follows.
Chapters
Wanted to talk about sex, libido, being 62, and all of that kind of stuff. Like many women my age, I don't walk around in heat all the time. In fact, most of the time I don't think about sex at all, except occasionally when I've been intimate with someone and it's been better than usual, and then I notice that my body is going, "Yeah, I'd quite like that again, please." and I get this temporary feeling of attachment which dissipates after 2 or 3 days, and I just have to wait for it to go away because I don't really want to be in a serious relationship with anybody. That just doesn't work for me. But I do like to have good sex from time to time, and when it's really good, then obviously I want it more often. But getting ready to be intimate is part of my whole ritual around feeling sexy. Because if you don't feel horny, then you need to do something. At least I need to do something to get that feeling going and to get those juices going. And a lot of that for me is just around preparation. It might be painting my nails, putting on red lipstick, wearing high shoes, no knickers, just getting into the feeling of wanting and feeling desirable, and then once everything starts going, then I start to get aroused. But for me, like I said, the prep, it's all about the prep. I just can't go into the experience with my sweatpants on and feeling icky. I've got to be showered, shaved, I've got to do the whole thing, do my hair. It takes a long time, but it's worth it.
