A woman in her 50s describes losing sexual desire during menopause without HRT, then rediscovering it through non-sexual touch. She found that kissing, cuddling, and massage rekindled arousal better than moving straight to sex.
The menopause can be a massive drag for lots of women, especially if you're a woman that decided not to take HRT like me. I know for a lot of women that are on HRT, they still have their libido and they're still really up for it and they're still quite juicy. But if you're a woman that decided not to go on HRT, maybe for medical reasons, then the menopause can have massive impact. I was fairly lucky. I'm out the other side now, thank God. But you know, I had some of the traditional symptoms, hot flashes, and my libido just, just jumped off a cliff, and I just didn't feel all that sexy and desirable. And as opposed to my 40s when I was just up for it all the time, in my 50s I just really wasn't up for it most of the time. And now that I'm out the other end, I'm starting to feel more sexy and more interested, but I also know that what makes a massive difference for me is just feeling desired. And when I'm with somebody and there's intimacy, and I'm not talking like the full sex act, I'm just talking about like kissing, cuddling, massage, just like being close with somebody, then I start to get more turned on and I want to have sex. But if that's not happening and the person just wants to go straight into it, then no, it can take me a while, or I might just feel just not interested at all. So it's about sort of getting into that point slowly and being intimate with somebody, and once I start to feel desired and intimate, then I get aroused.
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