When sex drives are misaligned

Misaligned sex drives, that's what I want to talk about. One person in a relationship has got a high sex drive and the other person perhaps has got a low sex drive. And I suspect, like many people, when you go into a relationship, it's not the first question that you naturally ask. And they don't ask that question on any of the dating sites. You won't find it anywhere, really. Sure, you can go on a website that's specifically aimed at hookups, so I guess we expect expect those sites to be filled with people that might have similar sex drives, but not necessarily. And what happens if one person just wants it all the time and the other person not so much? It's one of the reasons why I always suggest that when you're starting out in a relationship, that it's a question that you ask pretty much at the very beginning, because there's no good finding out that you've got all sorts of similar interests— you love to travel, you to go shopping, you love to discover new things, and then discover that actually when it comes to your sex drive, one, you're at completely different ends of the spectrum. And often, because you've invested so much hope in these relationships, you naturally want your sex life to just suddenly and magically work out. And when it doesn't, sometimes you just think, well, maybe it's not that important, or maybe I can, you know, move past this, or maybe we can work on this together, but I think that your sex drive is kind of— it's, it's a part of who you are. So if it's high and it's high, and if it's low and it's low, and I don't think there's actually all that much that you can do about it. Sure, you can do things to kind of spice things up and make the person that has a lower sex drive perhaps feel a bit sexier, but ultimately, at the end of the day, you may discover that having very different sex drives is the reason why your relationship over the long term just isn't going to work.