Suzanne NobleHost, Sex Advice for Seniors · Sex, Dating & Relationship Advice for Over 50s

Women fantasise, men rehearse.

20 Jan 2023 · 2 min

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1:49

In this monologue, the speaker shares their personal struggle to write erotic short stories, noting that their ideas often feel indistinguishable from pornography and contemplating abandoning the effort. They pivot to a broader claim that women possess a strong capacity to fantasize, which they channel into their sexual lives and relationships, while men are characterized as rehearsing or acting out base, animalistic impulses. The speaker contrasts the literary tradition of erotic fiction—asserting it is predominantly authored by women—with the massive, male‑driven pornography industry, suggesting this reflects a fundamental gender difference in how sexuality is imagined and expressed. The overall tone is conversational and opinionated, with a critical view of men’s contributions and an admiring stance toward women’s imaginative sexual agency.

Chapters

Sex sells, they say, and that is almost certainly true, but it doesn't pay the bills in this flat. I've been trying to write erotic short stories for a while now, and I find it quite difficult because my mind churns out stuff which is just really no better than pornography. And I'm tempted to give up on the whole idea, really. Um, but I think it brings me back to something I've said for a long time, which is that, um, women fantasize but men rehearse. If you think of all the great literature, great erotic literature that exists, it's all— it's almost all written by women. Men have contributed really very little to it. They've contributed a great deal to the billion-dollar pornography industry. But that is something very different. But it does make— what make me wonder whether that is the fundamental difference between men and women is the women have this incredible ability to fantasize about things and to bring their fantasies to bear in their lovemaking, in their sex. And in their relationships, whereas men are really quite base, uh, animals, really. I'm constantly amazed that women have anything to do with men when it comes to sex, when it comes to anything, really. Um, they hold up more than half the sky.