Reading About Other People's Relationship Issues On Reddit

Hello everybody and welcome back to my channel. For those of you who don't know me, my name is Angel Ardito and I'm working to normalize all things sensual because sensual feelings are something that we all experience and that none of us should ever feel shame over. Today I'm actually going to be reacting to some Reddit posts from a relationship advice subreddit, so I'm not going to blab anymore. Let's get right into it. The first one says, "Wife, 47, doesn't like even non-sexual touch. Married 23 years, monogamous, 1 teenage kid, sex life kinda okay, twice a month max, but this post is not about that. I can't even touch her and can never expect a positive reaction. Only time I can is very early in the morning in bed, just before we wake up, when I snuggle and then she won't push me away. She never touches me during the rest of the day. I tried to, but her reactions pissed me off. Ew, cold hands, yuck, that's disgusting, and a variety give recoils and restrictions such as just put your hands on my shoulders if you want, but don't move them around or squeeze, no touching my bum, et cetera. I am made to feel cheap and actually do feel lousy since I got used to this kind of touch since I got married. I wish I was independent and trying very hard to get used to the no-touch life. Some resentment is building up, but I look at the overall picture. She's a wonderful mother, great manager of the household, and financially very prudent. No complaints at all. Therapy's ruled out as she says nothing is wrong. Has anyone been in this situation? Yikes. My first instinct is to question, why doesn't your wife want to be touched by you? Why is she disgusted by you touching her in any manner, not even just sexually? I don't have any kind of context here. I don't know if there's been any kind of betrayal, but I feel like he's coming at it from a very accusatory stance rather than an inquisitive stance. If my partner was literally wincing when I went to touch them and like never wanted to touch me or engage with me, I would be very curious why they felt that way. Like I would be asking them, hey, it seems 'Seems like you're bothered by my touch. Is there anything that I've done to upset you? Can we talk about this?' This post is very me, me, me, like, 'I can't touch her, sex is kind of okay, I feel cheap, I feel lousy, I'm resentful.' And then this person also says that she's a wonderful mother, a great manager of the house, and financially very prudent. Something that so many men don't even realize is that the women that they're with do a lot of labor. A lot of the mental load gets stuck on them. But on the other hand, he does say that therapy was ruled out because she says nothing is wrong. But if she's refusing therapy and he's unhappy, I don't see how anything is going to change if they're not communicating about that. Either you're gonna live a touch-free life, you're gonna wind up cheating on your partner, or you're gonna separate. I don't see really any other options to that. Another thing is that she could also be cheating. So, you know, you could check her phone, check her emails, see if there's some infidelity there on her end that may be the culprit of why she doesn't want to be touched by you. Let's move on. "My 25 male boyfriend follows a lot of risqué accounts on Instagram. Am I, 22 female, allowed to feel bad about that? For some context, we've been in a relationship for almost 3 years now. I never felt the need to go through his following like I have heard other people do until now. I'm not quite sure why I felt the urge, but I immediately regretted it. I feel disgusted with the kinds of accounts he follows, although a lot of those may be from before we got together. I do not follow any types of accounts that he does. Your following is very public, and to me it feels grimy to still be following stuff like this when when you're in a relationship. I don't really know how to feel right now. The main thing I feel is absolute disgust. I also checked, a lot of the accounts are very active, so it's not like he followed them years ago and forgot they exist due to inactivity. He's on Instagram a lot, so it makes me feel even worse. It makes it significantly worse because all of the girls have perfect bodies that I will never be able to accomplish. Yes, you're allowed to feel the way that you feel. If you've talked to him and told him that this hurts your feelings and makes you uncomfortable and he's refusing to acknowledge that or gaslighting you, then that's different discussion, and perhaps that's a relationship that you need to leave. I don't think that following certain accounts is objectively bad or good, but I am a firm believer in listening to your partner's feelings and actively trying to accommodate them. If my boyfriend ever told me that someone I followed made him uncomfortable, unfollowed immediately, because he's more important than anyone that I have on social media. So I would expect the same from anyone who I was seeing. And I don't believe that it's abnormal for you to be feeling this way, because it is really common to desire sexual discipline from the person that you're with. And following hundreds or even thousands of OnlyFans models or Instagram models displays a lack of sexual discipline and a lack of control over yourself. It's really not that hard to just not follow someone that you see on the internet. And if it is difficult for someone, then perhaps that's an issue that needs to be looked into a little bit more deeply. The most important thing is communication. Come on, you need to be talking to each other about these things. You're 3 years into the relationship, like, these are things that you should be discussing early on. So many people think, well, I don't want to rock the boat, it's so early, yada yada yada yada. It doesn't really matter. You need to be talking about your values, your comforts, and your discomfort when you're first in the relationship. Like, these are the conversations that should be had early on. All right, this one says jealousy with boyfriend, 24, male, in social settings, 25, female. Jealousy when socializing in groups with my boyfriend. We have befriended this one amazing couple. We hang out all the time and they feel like really solid couple friends. The only thing is when the 4 of us are hanging out, he and my friend go into pretty deep conversations quickly and it tends to dominate the group setting. Me and her boyfriend are just sitting there awkwardly. My boyfriend is always looking directly at her when telling stories, whereas she looks at everyone and shares it to all of us. It's undeniable that they have a strong spiritual connection as they're both indigenous and have a lot in common family-wise and personal. That being said, her boyfriend is unbelievably loyal and only has eyes for her. Him and I barely talk because he's he's so focused on her, so it starts to feel like she becomes the primary focus for both of the guys and I just get left on the sidelines. Her boyfriend has expressed jealousy to her because he thinks my boyfriend is her dream man. He drives her dream car and all these little alignments. I've also felt jealousy over and over again with them because their convos leave little to no room for contribution to anyone else. How to work through these feelings? He reassures me he has no feelings for her and is simply happy to have friends to connect with, so I think it may be something I have to personally work on. Any input helps. If Jealous, and anyone is ever telling you that you have no reason to feel jealous or you shouldn't be feeling jealous— jealousy is a primal instinct that we have when we feel like there's a possibility that one of our primary attachments could be severed or damaged. So this is your body screaming to you, help, help, help, I'm gonna lose this connection, I'm gonna lose this connection. Totally normal. I would be incredibly jealous if I was in a setting where my boyfriend was only looking and talking to another woman and not really including me in that conversation. To me, that's reason enough to be jealous. That's reason enough to not just jealous, but to be kind of insulted. Why would he not be bringing you in on the conversation? Why would he not be even glancing over at you and trying to include you in little ways, like laughing and then looking at you? You know, it just seems a little bit fishy. And her boyfriend also thinks that they have that. Then there might be something there. I hate to say it, there might be something there. Many, many people will deny that they have feelings for someone else because they're in a relationship. They'll deny it to themselves, and then they'll deny it to everyone else around them. It's a fucked up situation, honestly. Like, like, my heart goes out to this person because honestly I don't know that I could handle that. I'm also super sensitive and I do get kind of jealous, but I don't know, maybe you could tell me in the comments, like, do you feel like you'd be jealous about that? 'Cause I definitely feel like I would experience feelings of jealousy if my partner was doing that to me. All right, well, that's pretty much it today. I know that that was a short video, but I only had a few minutes to film before my boyfriend comes home and I cook dinner for us. So I'm gonna go get dinner started. Mwah, I love you guys and I appreciate you so much. If you like this video, please do not forget to like, subscribe, and comment. All those silly things really do me to grow my channel and help me to continue to bring content to you. So I'll see you in the next video, and until then, stay spicy!