The DRAMA On Reddit Is REAL 🤯

Hello, hello, hello, and welcome back to my channel, you nasties. If you're new here, hi, my name is Angel Ardito and I'm your local spicy coach. But today I'm actually going to, um, just kind of scroll through my Reddit and I'm gonna react to a couple posts and we'll just kind of see what's out there on Reddit today. Oh, and also if you're not new here, yes, I'm in a hotel room. I mentioned in the last video, but my home flooded a few months ago. I've been living in a hotel and I decided that it was just too long for me to wait to not make content, so I'm here in my hotel room to hopefully just entertain you for a little bit. And if I can't entertain you, then I'm sorry, but I'm out here doing my best. All right, here we go. So I cheated on my boyfriend and I regret it. Boyfriend is 18, male. I'm 18, female. Ex is 19, male. I cheated on my boyfriend, who I've been with for a while now, with my ex. When I cheated on him, I was not in a good state, so I don't remember exactly how it happened, but next thing I knew, I was having relations with my ex. I know I'm in the wrong, I don't need anyone to tell me that. I told my boyfriend the next day and he was pissed, understandably. We broke up for 20 minutes before he took me back, and by the next day we'd completely gone back to normal. However, whenever something is said in a bad way, like building up to an argument, he brings it up. Even if I'm just asking who's the girl on his phone, he says something like, 'You know you have nothing to worry about because I'm loyal, something you wouldn't understand.' This sort of thing catches me off guard every time he says it, and I don't really know what I should do. I've apologized hundreds of times, but It feels like if he does anything wrong, I can't say anything because it gets turned straight back to me. Girl, he's traumatized. You cheated on him. And whether or not there was alcohol involved isn't really an excuse. It's like he's traumatized. And also, I mean, you guys are like so young, 18 years old. Like you're basically— you're teenagers still, so your brains are not fully developed. So it makes sense that you don't quite understand this yet. But basically what happens when someone gets betrayed is they go through this um, there's like this symptom of betrayal trauma that happens that a lot of people don't realize. Before you betray them, you are typically your partner's primary attachment. Like, when we're babies, we are primarily attached to our parents, but as we age and get older and as we find a lover or a life partner, that person becomes our primary attachment. And when that attachment gets threatened, we get all these alarm signals going off, and it's like basically our brain is telling us, you can't lose this attachment because it keeps you alive, because we're humans and we need attachments to survive. When someone betrays you, that is a trauma to your survival. And so what, what's really difficult about navigating being cheated on is that while you hate that person for what they did to you and you're so hurt by them and you can't even stand to look at them because they are your primary attachment, your body feels like it needs them to survive, if that makes sense. So there's a lot of pushing and pulling that happens when you get cheated on or when you're, you know, when you're betrayed in any kind of way by an intimate life partner. It's like, I hate I hate you and I need distance from you because you're not safe. And then like 2 seconds later it's like, no, I need you because I'm not safe without you. And so it's this push and pull. So when you say that you broke up for 20 minutes and got right back together, that checks out. He's damaged, he's traumatized, and he's hurt. I think it needs to be worked through in therapy. Or honestly, you guys are so young, you might just cut ties. It's a horrible situation. And I don't think him breaking up with you for 20 minutes and then getting back together with you will fix the issues that he now has to live with. Because you cheated on him. All right, enough said. All right, next up: I, 29, female, found another girl's underwear in my boyfriend's, 28, male, suitcase. I'm staying with my boyfriend in North Las Vegas for the weekend at his hotel. He travels for work and I get to see him every few weeks. This morning while he was at work, I went to look for a t-shirt in his suitcase and found two pairs of women's underwear. There is no reason he should have two pairs of used women's underwear in his suitcase. They were in the inside pocket tucked into the corner under other clothes and were clearly hidden. It could be from one girl or two as they are different sizes. I need to bring this up to him. We have plans for the rest of the weekend, and I'm not sure what the best way to bring it up is. I could also leave a pair of my own in there with a note, but I have no idea how long it would take him to find that. Has anyone been in this situation before, and what do you think the easiest way to bring it up would be without being accusatory right off the bat? Obviously, the first instinct is to wonder if he's cheating, but I would be curious as to why he has those underwear in his suitcase packed on a trip that he's specifically going to go to with you. Like, that doesn't even make sense logically. Like, if I— if Personally, I mean, I would never cheat on my partner, but personally, if I was a cheater, I wouldn't pack the underwear of the people I cheated with and then take it on a trip with my partner. It's very— I don't know, it's just very odd. Probably one of two things is happening. Either one, he likes to wear women's underwear sometimes, or two, he has a fetish and he likes to buy underwear, like used underwear online, and like smell them. And as long as the only thing you were concerned about is cheating, I might take a deep breath. I don't know that I believe that he's cheating, but who knows? I don't know anything. Here we go. Um, why did my husband, 30 male, say this to me, 29 female, when he was drunk? Tonight my husband was drinking a considerable amount. He was quite drunk and started talking about how much he loves me and that he will always love me. He gets emotional when he's drunk, but he doesn't usually talk about his feelings much other than a basic I love you. He told me that we will never separate because we've been through so much and that I'm not just a woman but a life to him. Then he said I mean so much to him and I'm his best friend and all that shit. It's what he said next that made me question things. He said I would never cheat on you even though both could, and it's tempting. We both have phones and the internet, but I would never cheat. I value our marriage together. Okay, I— let me finish reading it. Let me finish reading it. I just thought his tangent about phones and internet was really strange. It almost seems like he had explored that before. We've been married for 10 years and we have 3 kids. It's been very hard at times. Does it sound like he considered cheating before? Yes. Yes, it sounds like he considered cheating before. And yes, it sounds like he probably did cheat before, because why would he like unsolicited offer this information that he's tempted, but he would never— like, it's just very interesting to me that he was so specific about the internet and phone. I would go through that man's phone tonight. I would do it. I would do it. I've done it before and I'll do it again. Bop bop bop. Yeah, I would definitely be concerned. Go through his phone and see what there is to see, because you know what? I will be that person. Your phone is like the biggest reflection of who you are when no one's around. Sorry, that's going to ruffle some tail feathers and some people are going to be mad that I said it, but I said what I said, and I'd say it again. Bop bop bop. Alright, this one says, "How do I stop getting soft randomly when having intercourse? I don't know if it's me or her, but whenever we're having our happy time, I randomly get soft out of nowhere. I don't get turned off or anything, so it's just really confusing. I've tried searching the web and can't find anything on it, so this is my last resort. Maybe my sex drive just sucks. LOL." Well, my very first question would be, what's your age and do you watch corn? Honestly, I think that's something that's not talked about enough is PIED, which is corn with a P induced erectile dysfunction. It's a very real thing and it affects even young men, as young as like 15 to 18 years old. And so if you're consuming that kind of content regularly, something that's really important to keep in mind is that that content is not sex. And in fact, it can actually get in the way of you being able to engage in sex in a healthy way. When you watch corn, your body is physically bonding with your screen and your phone, and so this becomes your template for what arouses you physically. So even though you might be in the moment with a woman with your real girlfriend or whoever it might be, your body is like, wait, this isn't what we do. Think about that, you know? Get real with yourself about if you're engaging in those things. If you're not watching porn regularly, then I would definitely say go see a doctor about that. My boyfriend, 24 male, of 4 years told me, 24 female, that he will not marry me unless we have a child. I'm already annoyed just at the title of this one because it's completely bass ackwards and it doesn't make any sense, but let's give this guy the benefit of the doubt and see what he has to say. My long-term boyfriend told me tonight that he won't marry me unless we have a child, because otherwise, what's the point? We've been dating for a while and he'll never discuss marriage with me. This obviously concerns me because I really do want to get married to him one day. Whenever I ask about getting engaged, I've always said not right now, but potentially in the future. He's always said I don't know to every question and basically shuts the conversation down. Our previous conversation He said that he would like to get married sooner than later, so that made me think he was actually changing his point of view. Tonight we had a serious conversation and he dropped the info on me that he doesn't want to get engaged until we're 29 and 30, and that shattered my heart. We talked for another hour or so and then he told me that he doesn't see a point in getting married if we don't have a child. I've always been on the fence about having a child because I know my life would be gone due to the mother-father roles in the Midwest. He doesn't really have any hobbies. He typically just comes home and plays video games all day. He doesn't help much around the house, even when I've been consistently asking for more help. How am I supposed to believe he'll be a great father when he can't ever sweep the floor? I have some health issues relating to my reproductive system, and it all started when he gave me HPV. I've had multiple procedures, and if it worsens, I might not be able to have children. We talked about all of this. He's the one who basically gave me this health issue, but still holds strong to no marriage if no baby. I don't know if I want a baby, but don't even know if I could give him one. My big goal in life is to finally be married one day. We do have a house together, but I could afford it on my own. I run it all by myself anyway. Oh my God, there's so many levels to this. If a man tells you that he's not interested in marrying you, then he's not interested in marrying you. If he doesn't want it, he doesn't want it. And you can't change that. You can't be an amazing enough partner to make him want to commit to you in that way. And then there's another layer to this that's like, if he's not doing shit around the house, why would you want to be married to him? You're actively doing all of the labor and all of the work while he goes to work just like you do, but he gets to come home and play video games all night and day while you manage the whole household. And then on top of that, he's demanding that you bring a child into this world, probably because he knows that he wouldn't have to do any of the work for the child anyway. This is fucking ridiculous, and I'm terrified for you. There's other layers to it too, which is like, why are— why— like, if I'm wanting to wait until you're 29 or 30 to get married is not a bad decision. I would argue that that's actually a really good decision because your brains aren't even fully developed until you're around 26 or 27 anyway. I also take issue with the fact that you're saying that your main goal in life is to get married. Like, you don't know if you want to have kids, which is fine, you don't have to know that, but you know that your main goal in life is to get married, and then what? Like, like, what's it gonna do for you? That's it, that's the question. What is it going to do for you? And then what do you do after that? Because if you're 20— how old did you say you were? Let's see, you're only 24. You're 24 years old and you get married. What are you gonna do for the rest of your life now that you achieved this giant goal that you had for yourself. Getting married shouldn't be the goal, but perhaps maybe fostering a very connected and loving, committed relationship could be a goal. And I think that's a worthy goal. It's not gonna happen with someone who doesn't value you or your time or your energy or your effort and doesn't value the house that you have because he doesn't care to fucking sweep the floors. One more thing: don't ask men to help you clean the house that they also live in. Them cleaning the house that they live in is not them helping 'You,' because that implies that it's your job to clean the house and they need to lend a helping hand. You guys both work, you guys both pay the bills, you can also both clean the house. Everything about this post was so sad and depressing and common. I would leave, I would leave. This man does not want to marry you, that's all I'm gonna say. He doesn't want to marry you, and I don't think that you should want to marry him either. All right, well, that is all that I have in me for today. I'm exhausted, my back hurts from sitting on this hotel bed. I know, wampum. Womp, but it's the truth. So yeah, that's pretty much it. If you liked anything that I said or did today, then please drop a comment, like this video, and, you know, subscribe to my channel. All that same old, same old. Um, and until next time, mwah, stay spicy. I love you guys.