Episode 162: Anyone can change your life forever, are you ready?

Welcome to the Soul of Innovation podcast. I am Thomas Anglero, sharing with you my thoughts and experiences that I think will help you and help me to better understand this thing we call life. The other day I was at an event and I met the CEO of a very powerful company. She was a fantastic woman, very well dressed, very well spoken. We got to know each other a bit, and she explained to me that she has some conflict with this, let's say, a male person. And I said, "Listen, I want to help you with this conflict. May I?" She goes, "Yeah, absolutely. I would love your help." So I said, "Put down your drink and let's do some role-playing." So I said, "I'm going to now be that person, and I'm going to talk to you the way you described to me that he talks to you." And so I started doing that. About 30 seconds after we started this role-play, She stopped. She put her hands over her face and says, "I cannot continue. I cannot continue." Her voice turned into that of a little girl. She was no longer this powerful CEO, this really, this mover, this shaker, this person who demands attention when she enters the room. She almost appeared to be childlike. And I said, "Why are you stopping now? You were doing so well." "I can't. I can't." I said, but this person brings nothing but conflict to you. This is your perfect opportunity for you to work through that conflict, for you to feel prepared for that conflict, because that conflict is coming. She was going to meet him in the next 3 weeks. She goes, I can't, I can't. She picked up her drink and left, head down, did not want to make any eye contact with me, nothing. So here's my question for you. You meet someone spontaneously, you're not planned, and that person says, I'm willing to help you, I'm willing to give you love. And that's actually what I told— I said, this is a form of love. Let's do some role play. I actually truly, truly want to help you. And you meet this person at an event, at a location, at a time where you're not prepared to open and share your personal stuff. Understood. But there's someone there to help you, someone who actually could get you through that, who could actually say, ask you at the right time, what's underneath that comment? What's underneath you, that smirk? Why are you giggling now? Calling your bullshit, helping you to uncover who you really are, the hidden biases that you have. And that's what we did leading up to this point where we— before we did the stimulating. I called her bullshit so many times that she— I opened up a level of trust with her that she allowed me to help her even further. But then it stopped. So your question you gotta ask is, would you have been prepared, one, to open up to a complete stranger? This person can help you. This person can help you to see who you are. This person can help you with the other person in your life who has the biggest conflict, who's, who's preventing you from loving someone you want so much. They're the wall, they're the brick that's preventing you from that promotion, they're the brick that's preventing you from you being happy. There's always someone that's preventing. If you spontaneously, just somewhere in your life, met someone while walking down the street, at a party, drinking a glass of water who knows, on the subway, taking a bus, and that person said, 'I want to help you,' would you really open yourself up to that stranger? Most of you would say no. So here's my question again: why? You know, the universe, the way it works, is the universe puts someone in front of you when you need it, exactly at the moment that you need it. The thing is, most of us are not prepared for that person, that angel, that mentor that we need at that moment. And we shrink away, we put our hands over our face. No, no, no, no, I'm not ready. No, I don't want to do this. I don't want to do this. But it's exactly when you need to do it. And what happens when you walk away like that? You have now buried even deeper that problem The person who, who frustrates you, who is giving you anxiety, has now become even a bigger person and more powerful person in your life to cause more trouble. You blew it. Why is it that you think that if you call, go to a psychologist or psychiatrist, you pay them money, they're going to fix your problems? Why do you have to have an appointment to fix your problems? Doesn't that sound ridiculously stupid? I'm gonna get my problem fixed. I have an appointment at 4 o'clock this afternoon. Seriously, life happens when life happens. Just because a person's a janitor doesn't mean that person can't turn your life around. Just because you meet someone at a party doesn't mean that person can't turn your life around. Do you know how many times in your past you met someone that could have turned your life around, but you weren't ready? You weren't open. There are people around you right now who could change your life around right now, but you're not ready, you're not open, and you don't see them that way. You see them as a school teacher, you see them as maybe a street crossing guard, you see them as somebody working in the local bodega, grocery store. Checkout counter. You see them working in a cleaners. You see them sweeping the streets. All these people are there put in front of you to change your life. You see them as your next-door neighbor. These amazing people all aren't on our TV. The people who are going to change your life, the people going to help you to grow, the people who are there to love you at the moment that you need love, are really all around you. But you have to be open to it. When this woman CEO walked away with her hands over her face going, no, no, I can't do it, I wasn't upset. I was just very sad for her because that was her moment. I didn't charge her anything. I was doing it for free, right? Love. One human being take care of another. So let me ask you, can you remember any time that somebody reached out and said, hey listen, I want to help you? And you're like, no, no, no, I'm too busy! Oh no, no, not right now! Oh no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, or no thank you. The universe put that person there for you at that moment when you needed it. It's and you ran. And now you look at your life, or you look at your situation, and you're unhappy. You're wondering why you're unhappy. You're wondering why you're in that situation. You wonder why you're lonely. You wonder why you don't feel loved. It's because you didn't— you didn't accept the love when it was given. It had to be pre-packaged in something that you thought was the way it was supposed to be. Nothing's ever the way it's supposed to be. Is the person you fall in love with the exact person when you, when you were a little girl, a little boy, the person you thought it would be? Hell no. Nothing's ever the way it's supposed to be. Everything is exactly the way it is because it's meant to be that way. What does the whole quote, the statement of what it's supposed to be— what does that even mean? My life is supposed to be perfect. I'm supposed to be in love. Those are dreams. The only thing that matters is right here, right now. What do you do with this moment? How do you take this precious moment and make it a moment that defines you? How do you take the next moment and be so open to allow someone stranger, someone you know, someone who's been in your life your entire life, allow them to change you, mature you, to love you? In many ways, life is not so complex. It's really simple, but we overthink things and we make it complex. When a person stops you and says to you, I want to help you, Don't say no, because isn't that what all of us want? To be loved, to be helped, to be hugged, to be cared for, to be seen. Don't say no. Life, the universe, God, whatever you want to call it, has put that person in front of you right then, just for you, because that's what you need. So go forth, spread beauty and light, and allow beauty and and light to spread all over you, to bask you in love, to bask you in the glory that you deserve. Don't run away with your hands over your face. Hey, no, no, no. You deserve your moment. You deserve a stranger coming up to you and taking care of you. Wouldn't that be wonderful? I think that's what's called a life moment. I'm Thomas Anglero. I love you with all my heart and soul, and I believe you are ready. Don't be so scared, intimidated, and surprised when someone in your life or a complete stranger makes you a bit uncomfortable. That's just a form of love, and that's exactly what you need. Take care. Until next time.