Past Failures Create Today's Victories

Welcome to the Soul of Innovation podcast. I am Thomas Anglero, and have you ever had a conversation with someone and you just didn't tell them the truth when they asked you a question at the very beginning of the conversation? You didn't tell them the truth because it was embarrassing to yourself. Let me tell you a story. The other day, I was fortunate enough to sit down and have lunch with a professional baseball player. The person who set up the meeting was really excited to get us both together because he knew about my background playing baseball. So I sat down and this professional base— former professional baseball player, he's not playing today, he's generally the president of a very large company. And he said, Thomas, tell me about your past in baseball. And at that moment, I wanted to tell the truth. At that moment, I wanted to say how at 13 years old, I was already playing AA baseball. I told him that part, but I didn't tell him then the next part, which was as I got better— but this is back in the early 1980s, yeah, I'm that old. Back then there was no internet, there was no digitalization, there was no analytics. There was just old men, scouts, who watched young players and they would make recommendations, and that's how you made it to the big leagues, the professionals as they call it. But back then, being in Brooklyn, that's where I played baseball, there was only the Italian leagues where the Italian boys played. And the Italian boys were chosen. I played in a league called Gil Hodges. I was the best in the league. And when they chose their traveling all-star team to travel around the United States playing against all the teams in the United States, and that's why these kids got opportunities to make it to the big leagues and make it to the pros. You had to be part of that traveling team. And I was the best in the league, and I was sure that I would be chosen for the all-star team. This traveling team. I was not chosen. The president of the league called me after when he went to choose the team, and he told me, "You were late to one practice, so you're not chosen." A couple of weeks later, members of the team called me and said, "Thomas, everybody else on this team has missed several practices. You're the only one who came late to practice." And that wasn't fair. I was afraid to tell this former baseball player the truth that racism was the reason why I didn't become a professional baseball player. That these obstacles in life that come our way prevent us from fulfilling what we think is our destiny. And this is the lesson that I learned in life. You feel that you're meant to do something, you're meant to be someplace, you're meant to achieve something. Even if you're given the gifts for it, it's not your destiny. So many times we are, we're right there, right at that precipice of success, and it's taken away from us, and we don't understand, and we're devastated. And to this day, I am devastated, and we're talking decades later. I'm still devastated because I was good. But that lesson, that moment was a gift. A gift to know that I was good. A gift to know that I have the talent. But that is not where I would end up, because if I'd ended up a professional baseball player, I would not be where I am today. I would not be recording this podcast. I would not be a proud father. I would not be a proud husband. I would not be where I am, and I would not have experienced what I've experienced. I would have taken a different fork in the road. Things happen in life because we're meant to grow. Things happen in life and it's painful, it's frustrating, but it's not meant to be. And it's taken me my whole life to accept that. Except many, many instances, but this is just one, but it's a perfect example of it. It wasn't meant to be. You're not meant to be that amazing ballet dancer. You're not meant to be that incredible swimmer. You're not meant to be the winner of that science contest. You're not meant to be that person who gets that promotion. You're not meant to be the head of that region. You're not meant to be a doctor. You're meant to be someplace else. You're meant to accomplish something else and along the way to influence the lives of so many people. Your goal in life, your destiny in life, is to change other people's lives. That moment when it was taken away from you, that you thought you were supposed to be— you're supposed to have won that award, supposed to have been chosen— that no with someone else's yes, because you are supposed to influence that other person so that they have that yes, so they have that smile, so they have that epiphany, so they have that moment. Our short-term gains are other people's lifelong benefits. Go forth and spread beauty and light. It's really hard to let go of these past memories that haunt us for so long, but I want you to think of those things as not as hauntings, as toll posts in the road where you met your future self, and your future self said, you are good enough to win this award. You are good enough to get this promotion. You are good enough to be chosen for this, but it's not meant to be. You have to go this way now. And then life just want to give you a taste of what and who you are and how good you are. Got that taste? Now we have to take you this way. I almost see it like a person putting their arm over my shoulder and like the future version of me putting an arm over me when I was 16 and I was good. Saying, Thomas, you are this good. You can play the pros. You're the best. But this is not what is meant to be. This is not where you're meant to go. You have to go this way now. If you see hurdles in life, moments in life, like that future version of yourself putting an arm around your shoulder giving you a hug at that moment and changing your life's direction, then life is even more beautiful than you've ever thought it was. It's always been beautiful. We just feel sorry for ourselves for too long. Now let's just be happy that we get to meet ourselves, our future self, all the time, and that we're never alone. And those most critical moments where we have to make decisions or decisions are made for us, We're never alone. We always have ourselves. I'm Thomas Anglero, reflecting hard so that you feel better and I feel better about the things we accomplished, or the things that other people will say, well, you didn't accomplish anything. No, I accomplished a lot. I made it to the big leagues. But my future self and I, we decided to go forth and spread beauty and light and influence and change the world for others. We didn't give up our dream. We still dream it, but we help other people to have even bigger dreams. I love you all. Until next time. Thank you for listening to that episode. If you want to contact me, you can contact me on my website at anglero.com, and you can also subscribe to the newsletter, or you can find me anywhere on social media with Facebook, YouTube, Instagram, and Twitter. Thank you so much, and I hope to hear from you very soon.