Melitsa Waage: Detoxify Your Mind | The Authors Unite Show #956

Welcome to the Authors Unite Show. Got Melissa Wagi. This is her book right here. Oh yeah, we got like 10 camera angles in here. So welcome to the show.

Thank you.

Yes, we're down in Miami. I call you the Queen of Miami.

That's Thank you.

So let's start with this. So we met 2 years ago. We met outside of where? What? News Cafe? Or not News Cafe, somewhere in Edgewater in Miami.

Oh yes, News Cafe. It was.

It was.

Okay.

And Jay Duran connected us. You had a book then. We talked, we hit it off, and then I spoke at your event, Epic Talks. And then like a year and a half later, this book comes out.

Yes, yes.

Let's actually, let's start with Epic Talks. How did you come up with Epic Talks?

Well, Epic Talks was born out of a need, a need of something enriching, you know what I mean? I was going to networking events, leaving completely unfulfilled, and, you know, not meeting people that I was really interested in connecting with, not meeting people that had the same, you know, mindset. You know, if you will, like wanting to grow, wanting to become, you know, better than they are already, right? So I remember thinking to myself, I think I'm going to move to LA, you know, because there's a lot of like personal development coaches out there and the industry is really big. But then I thought to myself, I was like, you know, if there— if I'm feeling this way, there's going to be hundreds of people, thousands of people that are feeling the same way. So why not I just start my own event and see who comes, right? So I thought of this, and then I reached out to a girlfriend of mine, Alicia Belchenko, and I told her, as I said, hey, would you want to speak at an— if I throw an event? She's a professor at the University of Miami, a law professor, so she's used to speaking on stages. So I thought to myself that having her, it would be easier for me. So she said sure. So I made this little flyer with her picture, my picture, and at the time I called it Epic Life Masters, and now it's Epic Talks. But, um, I just printed out 100 flyers. I passed them out all over Brickell. That's sick.

I was gonna say, were you like knocking on doors?

Yeah, so I was like, I went all over Brickell and then the area that I live as well. And, um, and I had the event in 3 days, and in 3 days 15 people showed up from my flyers, and 8 out of those people were my friends, so in reality 7 people stood up, but I felt in my zone of genius when I was there and speaking on stage, and people— and I had exercises for people and mental exercises, and they were like writing them down, and I saw how they were talking, the connection was amazing, you know, I had some cheese and crackers and some wine, and everybody was kind of like networking in the beginning and at the end of the event as well, and I said, I'm on to something here. You know, and then I partnered up with a couple of influencers here, you know, Jason Stone, Millionaire Mentor being one of them, Andres Ospina, and Luis Escobar as well. And, you know, we did our first event after I reached out to them, and, you know, the first event after my first first one was 120 people.

Yeah.

So, and then Epic Talks was never the same, you know, it's become the number one networking event in Miami.

And that last one, actually, me and Colin, my brother, were talking about this. At your last Epic Talks, you did that exercise where you had people— I can't remember all the questions.

Life, mission, purpose.

Yeah, it was awesome. It gave you so much clarity. Can you walk through it a little bit? Yeah, absolutely. Okay, yeah, yeah, because it's a lot to remember.

So basically, I take you through 5 questions. A lot of my clients, what they tell me is— I work with a lot of CEOs and entrepreneurs who are looking to have it all in life. You know, high performers. So what they tell me is that they have a lot of money and they have an amazing job and an amazing title, but they're not feeling fulfilled in their lives. They're feeling empty. They're feeling a little lost, and they feel they want more, but they don't know what it is. And when I sit with them, within 10 minutes they finish that exercise like you guys did, and they like, they have like a breakthrough. Oh my god, this is always what I wanted to do. So with the first question, You know, I ask them, who are you? Yeah, I mean, are you a leader? Are you a communicator? Are you somebody who likes to socialize? You know, so I give them like 30 different options. That— then the second one, what are your talents? Then the third one, what roles do you play in life, right? And then the fourth one, I can't remember exactly what the fourth one is, but the fifth one is Who do you want to serve? Like children, moms, dads, entrepreneurs, in the field of what, you know? So once you've— you answer all this, I only have you pick like 2 or 3 of the entire—

yeah, of each, like describe.

Yeah, yeah, of the entire list that I give you. And then towards the end, you basically create a full sentence of who you are and what your calling is. And but I guide you through that. And once they, they, they, they finalize it, they're like, oh my God, you know what I mean? So it's actually, uh, when I work with my clients, I do this exercise in the beginning of the session. I have a 12-week program. So the first session I have with them, I do this exercise. The last session I have with them, I do the exercise. It's completely different. They're like a new person. So it's pretty cool.

It was so weird that night when I filled it out because it was like I was like doing things that I didn't it wasn't like in the forefront of my mind, but after I filled that sheet out, I was like, oh, I'm kind of living this out, but I didn't realize. But you know, once you realize something, then it becomes more potent in your life. So it really helped me to like actually zero in on what I'm already doing more. So I appreciate you having it that night. It was sick.

I love that. Thank you.

So let's actually go back even further. So what were you doing? Yeah, let's do it like this. So what were you doing before Epic Talks, like career-wise? And then like before that, what led you to that career that then led you to Epic Talks? I want to understand like how you got to this place.

Okay, well, before Epic Talks, I was— I spent the last year, 7 years in personal development.

Okay.

I pretty much made personal development my religion. I've been in medical sales for the last 10 years, so I work with orthopedics, and you know, I was that salesperson knocking on doors and trying to get their business. You know, so that created a really nice lifestyle for me and allowed me to, you know, start multiple businesses.

Yeah.

So, however, 7 years ago I found myself in a really dark place in my life, and I had, you know, I was going through a divorce, and it was, it was just a moment in my life where I was betrayed, and I just never saw that happening. So imagine being with somebody for a decade and and, you know, who you thought was your best friend betrays you, and then you're kind of like, you leave that situation. And I found myself like, oh my God, what am I gonna do now? You know what I mean? And I just didn't know. So I spent like a year and a half being completely self-destructive, you know. I— not like horrible, but it wasn't leading me into a really good situation, right? I was partying all the time, I was drinking all the time, you know, I was hanging around with the wrong people. And I remember waking up one morning and I looked at myself and I go, you've come so far in your life, you know what I mean? Coming from my background.

And wait, what's your background?

I was a foster child.

Okay.

My biological parents were heroin addicts and I was put into the foster care system at the age of 3. And, you know, I had— I didn't have like the cookie-cutter childhood. You know, it was difficult at times, you know, and I've been on my own since I was 15, you know, so that, that was that. And just realizing how far I've come, you know, I even got kicked out of high school and told by my principal that I would never amount to anything, you know what I mean? And here I am, I started my first business at the age of 24. So fuck yeah! Hope you're watching this, bro.

So what'd you get kicked out for though?

I was missing too much. Yeah, I was missing too many white days. The thing is that, um, I have a funny story, I'll get back to the question, but, um, the thing is I used to take a bus, right, and then I would fall asleep because I had to wake up at like 5 in the morning to take the bus, and then I would fall asleep and I would end up in Disney World because I lived in Orlando. So instead of going back to school, I would— I learned the back ways to get into Disney for free. That's perfect. So I just started skipping school and I would just end up literally in Disney almost every day. And I, you know, it was just like, and I was on my own too, so it was kind of like I didn't have that, that structure, that parents making sure that I got home on time. And, you know, I was just kind of living my life. So I got kicked out of high school for, for, for missing so much. Uh, so I had to finish high school on my own. I, I got into a special program where you go to the this class and you kind of finish it. Yeah, so that was that. But anyways, back to GED type thing.

Is that— huh, is it GED or something?

No, no, it's not. It's not. No, I finished. I, I took all the classes. It wasn't a GED. I took all the classes but in like a different setting. It wasn't like the normal school, so I had a graduation and all that stuff.

Yeah, uh, I think we can all relate. I mean, if I had to choose between school or Disney World every day, if I actually had that option, I mean, I think I would have chosen Disney World. I mean, makes sense.

So yeah, I was kind of in my own little world, you know what I mean? So, so anyway, so, so yeah, just, just realizing that— I remember waking up and looking at myself in the mirror and I told myself, are you gonna allow your, your circumstances to destroy you or to make you? Are you happy with who you've become because of that betrayal? And I was like, no. So what are you gonna do to change this? I remember I was talking to myself like talking talking in the mirror, not thinking it, talking to myself.

Yeah.

And I remember sitting on Facebook on my computer, and I see this sponsorship, this ad. It said, reignite your life, your finances, and your future. Free ticket, 3-day event. I'm like, this must be a cult. Yeah, free, free to change my life. Yeah, you know. So I contacted my girlfriend, um, Alexi Panos, you know?

Yeah, yeah.

Okay, so she and I, we know each other.

I didn't know you knew her. Yeah, okay. Yeah, she's better in Boulder, like 8 years ago.

Oh my God. So she and I used to like model together back in the day. We even tried out together for The Amazing Race, and the only reason why we didn't get picked was because she had a contract with a TV network. You know, she's a host. Yeah, yeah. And we just didn't— we couldn't get on the show because of that.

But wow. Yeah, yeah, that's weird, right?

Yeah. So I contacted her and I said, Alexi, have you ever heard of this company, Peak Potentials. She's like, no. She's like, however, if you get one good thing out of this, it's a win-win situation. So I took that advice. I booked my ticket, I booked my hotel from Vegas and went to LA. Those 3 days changed my life. I ended up investing $6,500 that weekend. Of course, thankfully they had a payment plan because I couldn't afford $6,500. They had— it was like $250 a month or something. And then she literally, you know, her advice just helped me change my life. And those, those 2 years I spent literally going to events every 2 to 3 weeks— I mean, 2 to 3 months, you know, Warrior Camp, Reignite Your Life, Business Mastery. And I was just surrounding myself with people who were like looking to elevate their life and take it to the next level. And once I saw the transformation in my life and And once I saw the people I started surrounding myself with, the people that will elevate you, that are going to be there for you, that are looking to create, looking to inspire, that to me, just, you know, I was like, I got to pay it forward. I got to pay this forward. So when I got to Miami, I started a little movement called Backpack Attack. It's like a charity for little kids where I give backpacks to children in need and I fill up the backpacks with school supplies. And then from there, then I started Epic Talks, you know, then I started Detoxify Your Mind. So I got into personal development and I frickin' love it.

Yeah, I think so. A huge lesson there is I think a lot of people think like conferences and those like the Tony Robbins and stuff, like it's all like culty and stuff, like kind of like, but like it's, it's kind of like a frequency, you know, like when you start like every few months if you go to events like this, you stay kind of at that level. Because I'm sure you can relate, like, if you're at a week-long— I think Business Mastery is like a week-long event or something.

Yeah.

Like, the frequency of that week is so high, and it kind of like carries on into your life for a few months, and then it probably dips a little. So if you stay on that every few months, you will literally stay up there. And it's not always like direct— you can't always like point back and be like, this is is exactly what I got from it, but it's more like a mindset and like a feeling, an environment that you build. So either way, so you went down that complete path. Do you still go to a lot of events?

Absolutely. And it helps that I am the founder of Epic Talks.

Yeah, yeah. Well, at least once a month you go to one.

At least once a month I get to, you know, network with amazing individuals. And I think it's important to consistently stay in this type of community of growth. Because it's like, it's like working out. It's like exercising the mind. It's not only that, but at these events you meet people that are genuinely there to better their lives, you know what I mean? So you're not really surrounding yourself with people who are gonna try to drag you down, but people who are gonna bring you and lift you up, you know? And, and absolutely, I stay connected with people in that environment. I listen, you know, I read books, I listen to certain podcasts, you know, and I just, you know, surround myself with people like you guys in here, you know what I mean?

So absolutely. So let's go back to the point. So you said you were married for 10 years. Yeah, that's right. So like, um, if you're willing to go, because I'm just curious how you got out of it too. So like 10 years, what happened? Like how, why did it end?

Oh, okay. Um, so, you know, I, I, I, I met this person at a young age, you know, I was 21. Got married at 24, and I started my first business, you know, as partners.

And yeah, you guys were business partners?

Yeah, I started—

oh wow, okay.

Well, yeah, I started a real estate company and visual investments, and that's when the real estate market was popping. Remember when all those shows started, like Flipping Houses?

Yeah.

So I was like, oh my god, I could do this. So me and my ex-husband we were just like, oh my God, we're gonna be filthy rich, you know what I mean? Let's just start buying houses. So fortunately, I found an angel investor, somebody who really believed in us, and he provided the cash. We would flip the houses and we'd split the profit, right?

Yeah.

And but then we got hit by— remember when the market crashed in 2008? It literally happened in like 3 months, like boom, you know what I mean? Right, Ronnie? Like, he's in the real estate business. Oh, you know, and I remember thinking to myself, we're working on this last project, I'm like, oh my god, I'm gonna be a millionaire. The market collapsed and literally like we lost everything we had made, like, and I'm like 24 years old, like feeling, what are we gonna do now, you know? And then I started thinking of other ideas, you know, and I, at the time my ex-husband had long hair down to here, and we just started talking if we're gonna do serious business, you can't be with this long— long hair. So, um, I remember thinking, we're on the computer and he's looking—

can't be like a stallion or something.

No, literally, he had like a ponytail with like— he would rope it and it like— it was like Cherokee Indian hair. And so then, um, you know, uh, I remember he was on the computer. I'll never forget this moment. I was sitting on the couch back here, he was on the computer. I'm looking, and we're just thinking, looking for a hair salon for him to cut his hair. We couldn't find anything with reviews, nothing. And I got a light bulb in my head, and I'm like, oh my goodness, this is when MySpace was popular. Remember MySpace? I said, we can start a platform for hairstylists and hair professionals and hair salons where they can showcase their reviews, their hairs, like before and after and all this stuff. And he's like, oh my God, yeah. So Then we started our first, you know, internet business doing that, and we found a web developer. Um, and at the time there was so many guys out there that was just scamming you and taking your money. I ended up investing $250,000 into that business within 4 years.

Wow.

Yeah. And, you know, it really— we, we got, we got screwed over with, with that partnership. But anyways, so we moved on and, um, and then started another one and But then we had an angel investor that was coming in with $1 million, and he ended up basically really screwing us over as well. And so, you know, that kind of put some pressure on the relationship. And, you know, my ex decided he wanted to cheat, and, you know, I just don't— I don't stick with that, you know what I mean? I'm loyal till death, you know what I mean? So I just felt that that was the end of that journey, and I'm actually thankful for that, you know. I'm not a victim of that situation, um, I'm more of a victor, and I wouldn't be who I am today if that wouldn't have happened, for sure. Um, and yeah, that's, that's, I'm here now.

Yeah, that's what I was gonna say. I mean, all those failures in business, right? I, I almost think people should seek those out immediately because you got through all of it at, you know, in your 20s. Yeah, pretty young age. And it seems to me like 30s with the sales position that you have, Epic Talks and the other things you're doing, in your 30s there's a lot more success stories.

Absolutely.

But you wouldn't have them if you didn't go through the tough times.

Yeah, the 20s is like, learn, fail at this, fail at this, fail, right? Torture.

And then, you know, a roller coaster. Millions, nothing.

Exactly.

Hair business, nothing. No, no, no, no. So, gotcha. Long hair? No hair? Okay. So, and I think you told me recently you're— I don't think you're moving there, but you're going to LA soon for something?

Yeah, I want to do an Epic Talks in LA.

Oh, okay. So where are you kind of— is that where you're trying to expand Epic Talks to other cities?

Yes, I want to start doing pop-ups, Epic Talks pop-ups.

Okay, gotcha.

So not that I'll have them there indefinitely, but that's the plan. Okay, you know, I want to, I want to grow Epic Talks where I have different speakers or leaders in the community that can have them the last Wednesday of the month, you know what I mean? And people can just tune in and watch us live, livestream, right, from all over the world. So Germany is asking me to go over there, LA is asking me to go, New York City, San Diego, Las Vegas, Yeah, there's a lot of places that want me to take Epic Talks, and, and, you know, the whole concept and the way we have the events, which is pretty amazing.

So yeah, let me know in San Diego. That's where I lived for 5 years, so I know a lot of people there. So once you get there, just ping it to that whole crew. But so what's the over— I guess arching vision of Epic Talks? Is it kind of that, like having it I guess nationally, and then you said Germany, so globally.

Yeah, I would love to definitely go global with Epic Talks. What I noticed, what Epic Talks has created is a community of trust, of hope, of, you know, companionship, of leadership, of entrepreneurship, mindset, business, lifestyle, like everything. And it's a representation of who I am actually, you know. When you come to Epic Talks, you feel loved. You feel like you're having fun, you know, it's not— it's fun but serious at the same time. And not only that, but you meet amazing people. And, you know, yesterday I got a message from one of the attendees and he goes, hey, I just wanted to tell you how much Epic Talks has changed my life, the people that I'm meeting there, and, you know, the business that I was able to start because of it. And that's what you come to Epic Talks to do, is to to learn, to evolve, to meet other people, and have the most amazing networking event in the world.

Yeah, and I think Drew, more, I mean I'm friends with him too, but more your friend Drew, what he said at your last event, that's how I kind of see Epic Talks. Where like, I can't remember exactly, but he lost some big stuff in a tech company, and then now he's doing mortgages again. But it was you that like let him like I think stay on your couch for a little bit, and then, did he meet his girlfriend at Epic Talks? Yeah, she's Spanish. Dude, like his whole life, basically right now. It's like, not, you know, he did it, but I'm just saying like Epic Talks is the foundation of it. So stories like that. And I'll even say for me, right? Like when we met, I had been in Miami for like 2 or so years. And what I kept finding is it's very touristy area. So I was having trouble like finding local people to like stay connected to maybe because I was hanging out at Mango's all the time. So I love Mango's.

We gotta go together.

Let's go. It's got to reopen. It's closed right now. But I was trying to find that community and then Epic Talks was really that beginning. And you know so many people around here, so you really are, I feel like, I don't know what you call it, you are the center of the Miami universe.

That's what I would say.

Wow, thank you. Yeah, yeah, I'm not just blowing smoke up your ass. Because me, Drew, there's just so many stories like that.

Yeah, thank you for that.

So let's dive into the book a little bit, Detoxify Your Mind. How did you break this up? Like, what's the book about?

So basically, I truly believe that people preach about what they struggle with in life, and I feel that that's a way of healing, right? That's how you heal yourself, is by helping others who struggle with the same thing you do, right? So for me, my mindset after I went through my divorce was not in a good place. And what I teach in this book is how I got myself out of that, how I got myself out of that mindset, how I got myself to thinking I am good enough, I am worthy of love, I am worthy of success, I am worthy of creating the life of my dreams, you know. And there's— it's basically a workbook, and it's a, it's a process, you know. It's a step-by-step-by-step process that you have to go through. You have to do the work. A lot of people want change, massive change in their life, but they're not willing to take massive action, right?

Yeah.

You want massive change, you need to take massive action, right? Unless you want to stay stuck in mediocrity. And I just— I was tired. I was tired of, of feeling, um, like I wasn't living my best, like I wasn't walking my purpose, you know. So through this book, I basically take you through different exercises and, and help you detoxify your mind so you can step into the best version of yourself.

So let's— that first event that you went to, so, so after you got divorced, it was like a year and a half of kind of self-sabotage. And then that— what was it about that first event that really changed? Because that seems to be like the catalyst.

Yes. So you know how you just mentioned, uh, you said you know, I just kept meeting like touristy people, you know, but Epic Talks kind of is like a community, right? That's what happened. I was going to this event, meeting people that were looking for purpose, meeting people that wanted you to really connect, you know what I mean? So that's what that event did. And then I saw kind of like, like the light at the end of the tunnel, like, oh my God, this is a community that can help better my life. You know, I wasn't finding that at the nightclubs that I was going to, at the bars I was going to, at the happy hours I was going to. No, I was finding what I needed to better my life at these events.

And would you say it was like— so it was obviously the content was there and the content was good, but would you say it was more like the people and the relationships?

I would say more the content. I was very involved in the content. Like, the people were amazing, don't get me wrong, but you're spending 10 hours getting coached with a coach on stage, you know. Yeah, there's like exercises that you do and collaborate with the people there, but it was just the exercises, them showing you, dude, you're in the gutter right now. Let me show you what you could do to get yourself out of the gutter, to get your mind out of that place. Let me tell you what I could do, what you can do to change your finances, to change your future, to evolve, to step into the better version of yourself. Yourself. And I wanted that so bad. And that's the thing, that if— when you want something really bad, you make that shit happen. And since I wanted it so bad, I wanted to change my life. I was a student, you know. A lot of people, I want this, I want that, they don't want it bad enough. That's why they're stuck where they're stuck at.

Yeah, yeah, I agree. So I want to go through routines because I feel like you're, you're just always at this very high frequency So when you're like, what's your typical, let's start with weekdays, like Monday through Friday morning routine and like, and not just morning, but what are you doing to stay so active? And just because you're like, you're doing a show in Miami, you're flying out to LA, like there's so much stuff going on. You have Epic Talks in 3 days. I think it's 3 days. So, so yeah, what's that look like? Like nutrition-wise, exercise. I know it's something you talk about sex life and is it this book or?

No, that book is coming.

Okay. So like, Now we're having fun.

Okay, tequila.

So see, I guess the whole lifestyle is what I'm asking. Like, how do you keep that energy like that?

For me, gratitude, it plays a big part. Gratitude. I— a really good, good week for me looks like this: I wake up at 5:30 in the morning. Yeah. Before I get out of bed, I do a a 10-minute meditation, right? I do a 10-minute meditation. The moment I get off of— out of my bed, I turn around and I make my bed. So then, you know, and then, uh, and then I write, uh, 10 things I'm grateful for and why. And I could repeat myself every single day, but I still write them down. I'm thankful for my house. I'm thankful for the food I'm gonna eat today. I'm thankful for my car. I'm thankful for my friends. Like, you know what I mean? And then in the first 15, 20 minutes of me waking up, I've created a routine of success, right? Because those little things, that's success. To wake up in the morning, that's success. To write down your gratitudes, that's success. To turn around and make your bed, that's success. You get what I'm saying?

Yeah.

So then as I'm making my breakfast, I turn on Tony Robbins or Bob Proctor or, you know, a motivational story or video or something inspiring, right? Um, Then I make my breakfast, I go to the gym, I work out, I have a trainer twice a week, um, he kicks my butt, you know, uh, and I just surround myself with amazing people. Anything negative in my life or somebody throws a negative thing at me, I reject it because I don't have time for that, you know what I mean? And I'm always aware, okay, how am I feeling? Who am I with? Who, you know, how are people making me feel? You get what I'm saying? And I just really like, I'm just living my best fucking life. I've never been happier, you know, and just walking and knowing that I'm living and walking in my purpose is fulfillment.

So, and what nightly routine do you have?

Yeah, nightly routine. I prepare for my following day. That way I can get some rest. You know what I mean? I don't, I'm not stressed out.

Or your mind will be running. Yeah, yeah, I'm the same.

My mind does run a lot. But to calm myself, I'll do a meditation and then I'll write, okay, this is what needs to happen the following day. You know what I mean? This— these are the top 3 important things to do.

Gotcha.

You know, so, and, and holding yourself accountable. And I'm not perfect. Does that happen every day? Do I have every single day like that? No, I'll be honest with you. You know, there's some days I don't feel like getting out of bed. You know what I mean? Like, we had a crazy photo shoot yesterday and, and we're like, yeah, we're gonna wake up early. We're gonna go to the gym and then the podcast, right? My alarm went off. We were— we had a crazy day, like exhausted. My alarm went off, I didn't hear her say anything, she was sleeping downstairs. I didn't hear her say anything, so I just turned it off and went back to bed. Wake up at 8 and she's like, hey! I'm like, what up? So much for waking up early. But you know, it's not every— some days are harder than others, you know, but I try to stay consistent with what I mentioned.

And you said, I actually haven't heard this before with— I know a lot of people do gratitude in the morning, but you said you write down why you're grateful for it. So what does that typically look like? Is that like a full page or like a few sentences?

Just a few sentences, and then I have a pineapple. Oh yeah, it's called the gratitude jar. So I feel— I fold them up and I put them in the gratitude jar. And the days that I feel crappy, I go into my pineapple and I take out a thing that I wrote, and I'm like, okay, this is why you need to snap out of your shitty situation, or mental, like, whatever you're feeling right now.

That's—

you know what I mean?

Yeah.

So, um, I suggest that to everybody. My clients all have a gratitude jar because I tell them, you know, this is what it does for me.

Yeah.

And, uh, so I'll give you an example. Um, I'm thankful. I'm thankful for my friends. I, I was telling her today, I was like, damn, I have amazing people in my life. Look, I'm getting goosebumps.

Love podcasting.

I'm just really grateful for the people that I have in my life. It's like insane. And because I've been in a situation where I've had shitty people, and the wrong people in your life will bring out the worst in you, and the right people will bring out the best. And when you're in those moments, you're not aware how poisonous some people could be to you. Your life, you know.

Yeah.

And being able to get yourself out of that and feel the way I'm feeling now— that's why it's so important to be surrounded by amazing people, people who are gonna lift you up, people who are gonna want to see you succeed, people who want to take you to the next level, and people that want to go with you. And I'm here to bring everybody with me, you know what I mean? That's the reason why I have Epic Talks, because because I know what it is to feel lost. I know what it is to feel like you want to kill yourself. I know what it is to be homeless, living in a car. I know what it is to be a foster child. I know what it is to like go through some crazy shit in your life, and I don't want people to feel like that. So that's why I'm here.

Yeah, and I think it might be the biggest lesson of this episode right there, is that I feel like you are that person for like everybody in your life. And because of that, you get that reciprocation from others too. Everybody in this room is there for you at that level, but it kind of, at least I can speak for myself, it kind of started with you being that way for me, right? Because with Epic Talks and everything, and Jay introduced us, but you're that staple for people. So then you've built up this hundreds, maybe it's thousands at this point, of people that are there for you. And now it's like, helping you progress on your mission as well.

Yeah, it's amazing. I'm so blessed with the people in my life. So yeah.

So you mentioned a few things there, so I'm just to dive into some of them. So like, you were actually homeless?

Yes, I was.

How long or when was this?

Well, when I was in high school, I was actually homeless for a couple months.

Okay. In Disney World?

Just saying, that's not so bad. I wish I would have found a little cave where they wouldn't find me. No, um, I lived out of my Toyota Corolla in front of a Walmart parking lot.

Okay.

And it's funny because, because, um, I remember there was like the post— it was, I think it was the first Walmart ever, ever, uh, ever. It was in Orlando, Florida, I think so.

Yeah.

And, and, um, Basically, I remember thinking to myself, I'm like, okay, I'm gonna put myself underneath one of the posts that has a camera just in case anything happens, you know. And for me it was like normal. I didn't think like, oh my god, I'm homeless. I'm like, okay, whatever, this is part of my life. But in order for me to get ready to school, I would go to the Disney resorts because I knew where the bathrooms were, and I'd take a shower, get ready, go to school, and then I had two jobs.

Wow. But do you even have to have that thought though, that like something could happen And so you specifically parked where there was a cab?

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Wow.

I mean, I think God has always given me that mindset, you know. I'm always like aware, always looking like, how can I get out of a tough situation, you know what I mean? Like, or I'm very intuitive as well. Yeah, I'm good at reading people, you know. I've gotten better throughout the years, but, but yeah, that's, you know.

Yeah, and I would say too, so though the tears that you just had recently, those were— that was like tears of happiness, right?

Yeah, it's just like— yeah, no, happiness. Yeah, just, just like talking about this, it takes you back to like, wow, you've come this far. And it's more— I get emotional. I'm a very sensitive, emotional person. I am too, you know. Um, so yeah, I'm just grateful. I'm so grateful.

And I think a big part of that— so like, it's— to me, I'm like envisioning, because I, I didn't know about your pineapple That's awesome. So like, like it's like I'm envisioning almost like these, like the fortune cookie slips.

Yeah.

And there's just like, there's hundreds of them in this pineapple in your kitchen. Is that what it basically is?

Yeah. You saw the pineapples, right? Yeah.

Yeah. So it's like, I feel, you know, you do that every morning or almost every morning, right?

Not perfect.

Almost every morning. And any day you wake up that it's like not the best day, then you open that up and you have hundreds of reasons for it to be a good day.

Absolutely.

You can't really lose.

No, like, not at all.

So, so it's like you're writing why, but then you're also collecting them. I don't know, like, that's— I have not heard that before. Because I do, I use this 5-minute journal and I do 3 things I'm grateful for every morning, and it's in a journal, right? So I flip back. Yeah, it's just kind of cooler though to put your hand in a jar or a pineapple.

Yeah, right? Give it a try, absolutely. Order a pineapple on Amazon or something.

Wait, is it— it's not a real—

or is it real? No, it's like a bronze one. Okay, wait, I was like, where's it at?

Me and my— we eat a lot of pineapples. We could make one of those.

You could, actually.

So a lot of our listeners, they're also— they're like aspiring authors. So this second book, right?

That's actually my first book. Oh, the one you saw, yeah, was a rough draft. Oh yeah, but it was like, yeah, it was printed and what I changed was the COVID Okay, gotcha. You know, I got with my team and then that's when you came into the picture and made it a number one bestseller.

Yeah, so like the writing process, like what was that like? Like how did you formulate all your thoughts and finalize it into a final product?

I wrote this book in 3 weeks, and I just—

okay, yeah, 3 weeks, that's crazy.

I just basically, I sat down and I'm like, okay, if somebody were to ask you, how can I change my life? I just said to myself, okay, well, how did I change mine? You know what I mean? So I basically take you through the process in that book.

And it just kind of poured out.

Yeah, I poured it out because I lived through it, you know. Um, Detoxifying Your Mind, I share a little bit about my story, about, you know, what I experienced, how I got into the darkest place of my life. Then I talk about There's Beauty in the Storm, that's a chapter in the book, basically finding beauty in the storm. Like, we just spoke about a storm, but look at the beauty now. Yeah, right. Um, then I talk about the power of forgiveness, like, regardless of, of the people people that have hurt me in the past, I love them and I'm sending them love, you know what I mean? And because of them, I am who I am today, you know? They were just, uh, they were just a seed that was planted in my story, you know what I mean? That helped me grow, you know? Every— everything happens. Everything that happens in your life is supposed to happen. Everything. That's why I wouldn't take anything back. Not one thing would I take back, you know? And a lot of people get stuck and like, oh my parents did this, or my job did that, my boss did this. Good. This is for you to grow, you know. Stop being a victim of your shit, you know what I mean? Allow this as an opportunity for you to step into the better version of yourself, you know. And, and that's what I did with this book. I'm like, and then forgive people. And then I also— a personal mission statement. Who are you? Who do you want to become? Who are you at this moment in your life? And what person do you want to become, right? And what do you need to let go of in order to become that person? And I take you step by step on that.

And that's why you got to keep going too, because like if you look back at your years, I mean, it was like a 10-year storm. Yeah, you know, but now we're on like, uh, I'm about 7, 8 years. Yeah, like, uh, what's the rainbow? Um, so, but with the— so 3 weeks, what Did you do like voice or did you actually like write it?

No, I just sat on my laptop and I just sat down and it just literally flowed out.

So you don't hear that often. So that's like awesome because most people, like they really, you know, as you know, I work with a lot of authors, so like they struggle even if they have the stories, they struggle dramatically with like getting it out of their head onto paper.

Yeah.

So did you, did you do any sort of like mind map or organize? Or you literally just like, fuck it, I have a story, I'm just typing it.

I'm the type of person, I don't like to look too much into the future. What is my moment right now? How do I feel? Yeah, that's it. You know what I mean?

Yeah.

The problem with people, the reason why they get, what do you call that, analysis paralysis?

Yeah.

The reason why they get that is because they're like, oh, but in order for me to do this, I gotta do this, I gotta do this, I gotta do this. No, stop thinking about that. Yeah, once you start, okay, then the next step, there you go, and the next step, you know, like, well, like when you first start to walk, one step at a time. So that's what the book— don't think about the big picture of the book. Once you start writing the next chapter, you start creating such a beautiful flow because you're writing about things that matter and something that you care about, that then the next chapter is like, oh my God, I just got an idea for the next one, and it just flows, and it just flows, and it was flowing.

Yeah, I actually, I tell people that all the time because I think what people do with books is they'll try to come up with the title first, which you can do, but I've heard of people spending months to years trying to come up with a title. And I'm like, imagine if you just get into the work, like the real work, which is the writing, then it can come to you, right? And I actually have the like long-ass blog posts like why you should write your book backwards. Not literally, but like what I mean is you should do the actual meat of the work first, and then the introduction and the title actually comes last. Because after you've written the whole book, and just like you were saying, like the next chapter kind of comes naturally to you. That's just the way it works. Yeah, but we sit and we're trying to like perfect this book that's not even out yet.

Exactly.

You can't perfect it. There's So I wanted to ask you too, with once the book was finished, and I know it was just a rough draft before, what was the route that you took, you know, prior to us connecting? Like, I guess, what halted it at that point? Right, because it was just in rough draft, right?

No, yeah, so I got it printed.

Got it printed.

And then I truly believe that when you when you're working on things, the universe brings things at the moment you need them. Yeah, you know what I mean? And that's when we met.

Oh, so it was just—

okay, we met, we met, and then I was just like, oh my God, this is a perfect person. Yeah, you know, for me to, to publish my book, you know. So, so we stayed connected, and it actually took me a year. I, I wasn't— I was— I didn't feel like I was ready to, to launch it yet.

Okay.

When— because this book was done, what, a year ago? And I hadn't launched it. I was going through something in my life that I was just like, I'm going to take a moment before I launch this book, because I know once I launch it, I'm going full force. You have to be in that, in that mindset, full force. You know what I mean? So I was struggling with something at that time. And once I was able to kind of, you know, deal with that situation and, um, I was like, okay, I'm ready to launch it. I'm in 100%.

And what's it been? Um, like since it's launched, what's like, I guess, what's the positive effects it's had?

Uh, well, I became a number one bestselling author. Um, and, uh, people just are ordering it a lot and I'm able to, you know, coach people on it and I, it builds credibility. Um, It's brought me a lot of new clients. Yeah, and it's allowed me to get on more podcasts, get interviewed by more people. Yeah, it's been just amazing.

Yeah, it's helping amplify the message. So one thing I want to come back to too is you were saying like you like to stay in the moment. Yeah, that's really hard for a lot of people too. Yeah, so like, you know, I know you meditate in the mornings and the nights. I do, I do like a guided meditation. Have you ever heard of Alan Watts before?

Yes.

Okay, so I do like this Alan Watts 15-minute YouTube. His voice is amazing.

Okay.

And that helps just like bring me back down, because when I wake up, I kind of look at my schedule sometimes, I'm like, hold it, my eyes cross, I'm like, holy shit. So, but that kind of centers me into the moment. And when you're in the moment, there's really no problems, right? Problems are either like you thinking about the past, or you like thinking about what could happen in the future, but in this very second, there really can't be a problem. So how do you, how do you stay in the present moment? And not even stay, but how do you initially get there, actually? Because I think it's very hard for people. Do you know how you do it?

Is it like, just so, you know, just creating momentum and staying in that momentum, you know what I mean? So if you start, if you tell yourself, I'm gonna diet and I'm gonna be there for like the next 6 weeks, continue doing that. Because I think Um, the reason, right, why people like tend to like feel behind or feel like they're— they failed is because they say they're gonna do something and they don't stick to it, you know what I mean? So once you start something, you have that momentum, keep it going and bring people with you, you know what I mean? I have high energy people around me all the freaking time. Ronnie's one of them, you know what I mean? Every time him and I get on a meeting on a phone call, yo, what happened? Yeah, I got this going on. Oh, hey, yeah, look, you know what I mean? Same thing with Rosie, you know, my best friend Alicia, my right-hand girl assistant, Sandra, like stay in the moment, keep going, keep going, you know what I mean? When you have that momentum, it's gonna be hard to stop that ball from rolling, you know?

And I think, and I'm sure you're aware of it, but you actually do that with your morning routine. Like you create all these kind of smaller, like small wins, Just like even making your bed, the gratitude, the meditation, and then it just kind of spirals into the rest of your day and then it goes into weeks, months, and years.

Yeah.

Um, so it's because people just, they don't think like making your bed is, is worth much of it, but no, it creates this momentum.

Yeah.

And that's what I tell entrepreneurs when they're first starting out or authors when they're first starting is it's like, it's not, you're thinking too far ahead. Once you get momentum, because you don't want to go back to that place, really, like that 10-year storm you had.

Yeah.

So it's, for me, it's similar where like when I dropped out of school, I was $80 grand in debt and shit was really difficult, and I don't want to go back to that. So like the momentum, it like, it keeps you at this high frequency.

Yeah.

So I guess what I'm saying is if you're in the beginning stages and you don't have that momentum momentum feeling yet, just know it's coming. It could take 10 years, could take a few years, like, yeah, it— but once you're there, you've—

I think you very rarely allow yourself to get back because you know how it feels to me. Yeah, yeah, you're like, like, yeah, I don't want to go back to that, you know what I mean?

Yeah, you'll do anything.

Ain't nobody got time for that. No, that's true.

Um, so I kind of— I want to leave it to you if there's anything else you want to share, like 'Cause I know you have so much knowledge. I mean, you work with so many people in here in Miami, you're expanding. So the floor is yours. And then also there's a lot of stuff at the end. Like I want people to stay in contact with you, all of our listeners. So like book, website, socials. If you're in Miami, obviously Epic Talks, or even if you're not, you should fly here. But yeah, I'll leave it to you on that.

Well, Melissa Wagi, oh no, melissa.com is my website.

Oh yeah, crazy by the way. You got your first name dot com. That's like, nobody has that.

That's awesome. Melitza.com, and you can get the book there. You can also find out how to work with me there. There's a couple of applications if you're interested in Detoxify Your Mind program, or if you're interested in one-on-one coaching. I mainly work with CEOs and entrepreneurs, high performers, you know, so if that's you, reach out to me. If you're in Miami, Epic Talks is the last Wednesday of the month. Except for November because it's Thanksgiving, and then on December we don't have one. But the rest of the year, it's the last Wednesday of the month. We're working on a gala hopefully for the next December to close— I mean, for this December. We were gonna do it in the end of November, but it's, it's a gala, so there's a lot going on. So I think we're gonna do it the first week of December. But anybody who's interested in being a part of that, to reach out to me. Epic Talks is an amazing community that is here to just, you know, help people change their lives, amplify their lives, and meet amazing, amazing people. And, and yeah, I'm just here to be of service.

So absolutely, thanks for coming on the show.

Well, thank you for having me, and thank you so much for— thanks to you, I have a number one bestselling book. And thank you for the way you've shown up in my life. You've helped me so much, and you inspire me. Thank you.