035: 5 Drivers of Performance with Dana Cavalea

Hi, I'm Natalie Jill, Fat loss expert turned high performance coach. When odds are stacked against us, how do we shift and create everything from nothing? How do we level up when we aren't feeling it yet or we've had a big setback? On this podcast, I'll be talking to some of the most inspiring and courageous men and women on this planet who at their worst, learned how to achieve success greater than they ever dreamed possible. Leveling up and creating everything from nothing. When Dana Cavalier's dream of becoming a pro athlete was shattered, he decided that there had to be some blessing and opportunity in his disappointment. And at age 19, he accepted a job cleaning up towels and being a waterboy with the Yankees. Now, Dana never looked at this as beneath him. In fact, he looked at it as an opportunity to serve and add value to some of the best athletes in the world. He decided that he'd add value, listen and learn. Now, while listening and truly living with the mentality of serving, Dana found the opportunity to add even more value. He started running the athletes through some core workouts that he had come up with. His humble attitude, constant wanting to add value, and his high levels of intuition propelled him into a coaching position. Now, Dana didn't just become any coach, he became a champion coach. Dana spent 12 years with the New York Yankees and even won a World Series in 2009. Throughout his career, Dana has had the opportunity to train and coach the greats that include the likes of Alex Rodriguez and Derek Jeter. In addition to working with high level athletes, coaches, CEOs and executive, he's an international speaker consultant, helping corporate workforces, sports teams, universities, organizations and more to optimize their overall performance through his five drivers of performance. I am thrilled for you to meet Dana today and learn how he continually levels himself, yourself and others up to create everything from nothing. I'm so excited to talk to you today about not only how you leveled up, Dana, but how you continually coach and get athletes into peak performance and have them level up. So thanks for joining me today.

Thanks for having me. I appreciate it.

So take me back a little bit. First, how did you even get into coaching? How did that become who you are?

Well, I always say that a lot of people that get into coaching are underperforming former players. Yeah, yeah. So I actually, you know, I was a baseball player. I had dreams of taking the field in New York, you know, in the Bronx and, you know, joining the New York Yankees as a player. Unfortunately, my talent set didn't allow me to get there, so I Went to the University of South Florida down in, down in Tampa. You know, I called Lynn that the New York Yankees happened to have spring training down there. I grew up in New York. You know, I was tired of the cold and I needed a change. I was, I started off my college career going to a small school here in New York and I was just, I wasn't feeling it. You know, I was, I guess I just needed a change. You know, sometimes we go through life and we need changes. And I had this vision for myself that change in the next chapter for me was down in Florida. So I went and got a degree in sports medicine, joined the program down there. And you know, when I called him as the Yankees were coming to town for spring training, I would actually go up to the spring training complex and I'd pull out my flip phone, that's how long ago this was, and I'd whip out my phone. I'd be taking pictures through a chain link fence, sending them home to my friends and family in New York. And I said, hey, look, there's Jeter. Hey, there's this guy. And you know, when I got back to my school actually later that, later that day, I had the strength coach with the football team reach out to me and say, hey, Dana, would you have any interest in, you know, working with the Yankees? And you know, basically just cleaning up the weight room, handing out waters and towels. And I said, you know, that would be, that would be amazing. I just got back from there, but, you know, I had a chance. You know, next thing you know, I'm at Yankee Stadium the next day down in Steinberger Field, it was called down down in Tampa. I pull my car in, I walk up to the desk and they say, hey, are you Dana Cavalier? I said, yeah. They throw a credential around my neck, put me in Yankee gear, and next thing you know, that same field I was taking pictures of through a chain link fence I'm standing on in the middle of a team stretch the next day. And you know, there's Jeter, there's Pettit, there's all these superstars. And here I am a 19 year old kid who, you know, just basically had a life changing experience in 24, you know, to 36 hours. And that's actually how I got into coaching. I was an underperforming player, realized that I wasn't going to get to the big leagues in Major League baseball based on my baseball talent. So I had to find another way to get there. And that was, you know, through coaching. And you Know, when I first started that experience I just told you about, I was an intern. I was 19. I really was raw. I knew nothing. And this was dating back to about the year 2001.

So you didn't know you wanted to be a coach. You just know you wanted to be in the presence of them. Is that what I'm hearing? So you just said you weren't going to play. But if I could be around them, if I could help, if I could be in. Learn from them.

Exactly. Exactly. What I did realize is as again, somebody that was trying to get every piece of his talent, take advantage of that. I realized that if I could train, I can get better. And that's what I did. So I maximized my own talent, my own potential through training. So I kind of fell in love with the training process and realizing how you can improve your physicality, which would in turn improve your mindset, and you would be a better player. And I said, wow, what if I could teach other people this? And that's how I got into coaching. I started again as an intern for free, working at my college, University of South Florida with the football team. And then the next thing you know, I'm now with the angst. And it was really a. It was. It was planned, but it wasn't planned. It was a little bit of circumstance and fate all mixed together, and it worked out for me.

You know, you just said something interesting. If I train, I could get better. So how did you decide not to do that for yourself? Because you said you realized you weren't going to make it there, but why not adopt that mentality for yourself versus now I'm going to teach others to do it.

I actually had it for myself, but I trained as much as I could. I took my headspace as far as I can go. I just didn't have the talent to get to the next level. So, like, the difference. The talent gap between college and the professional ranks is small, but it's huge. And I think that's the same in a lot of parts of life. You know, it's. There's small gaps, but they could be very big gaps. And it's our job to. To know how we can close that gap and how far we can actually close that gap. And there's. I believe that everybody has a feeling, and I know that goes against. And it's contrary to a lot of the things that we hear out there. I mean, you could persevere and you can push, but there are certain feelings that exist for me. If I trained every Day, like, I did, and I worked on my mindset, and I did all those things, and I had great coaches. I. I wasn't able to hit certain pitches that were thrown to me as a player. I just. I wasn't able to do it, so I had to tap out. And that actually became, you know, a resistance point for me in my life. And I said, you know what? I'm going to try to push through this resistance as much as I can. But in pushing through that resistance, it actually pushed me into the field of coaching. So it's like, push, push, push. It pushed back and pivoted me into what I was, I guess, supposed to be doing, you know, And I've had a lot of fulfillment from that, you know, more so than I think if I was a player.

It's interesting. It's like that you saying, I'm sure you've heard about, like, life happens for us, not to us. So I'm imagining at this first reality of, like, okay, I'm not going to be a pro player myself. What did that feel like? And did you struggle with that at all, or. It sounds like, because the way you told it, it was super quick. I'm now a coach, but I'm imagining there was some type of struggle there with yourself.

You know what? I don't know. You know, I think maybe at different points in my life, it shows up as, you know, stress and anxiety at times. So I never maybe formally grieved it. But, you know, I was also fortunate enough to be around that same game that I was trying to get to the highest level at. I made a career out of that game at the highest level. So I was around it. I was in it. The only thing I couldn't do was actually step on the field for nine innings. But I was living the life of the players, and I was living, you know, that professional life that I had dreamed of. Again, I didn't have the accolades that I would have had as a player, but I found fulfillment in helping other people achieve their dreams and their goals. And that was something that just kept paying me back dividends, day in, day out, season after season. And it's something that I continue to do so or receive benefit from. So it's, you know, it wasn't something that struck me as, hey, Dana, you know, you failed here, because I really won, you know, I won big on this.

I love that you're sharing this, because I know for a fact that so many people get stuck on a perceived failure. Like, they had one mission and then they're not looking at the opportunity of what else is there. And you actually did the opposite. You had something that could have been a failure, but instead of that paralyzing you and stopping you, you shifted into an opportunity.

Yeah. And that, I think, has been. That's the theme of life for many, whether they choose to acknowledge it or not. I mean, I, you know, I opened five training center training facilities. I was creating a franchisable brand as well, while I was still with the team. And you know what? After five years, you know, that didn't work out the way I wanted to. So again, now that pushes me into another space. So every time you are failing, you know what the world would call a failure, it's oftentimes setting up a big win for you. So that's what I've seen. And I think those that, you know, we glorify and that we see have really made it. If you go through their story line by line, they've actually gotten their butt kicked quite a bit. They just chose not to focus on that and stay in that space for too long. You know what? I got my butt kicked, but what's next? And I think that that's the perseverance and the mentality of success and achievement overall, you know, truly.

So you went to the, you became an intern, and then you start seeing this opportunity for coaching. How did it actually transition into coaching? And how did you learn to be a coach?

Yeah, so I have a couple stories to wrap around that. But, you know, this again, I'm going back to around the year 2000, 2001. This is when the term core was just coming out. So like I said, I was 19 when I started. I really didn't know anything. And I said, you know what, there's this word core that's floating out there. And the guy I'm working on there doesn't really know much about it. The players know it as a buzzword and they don't know much about it. I'm going to go home and I'm going to study everything having to do with the core, from the physiology and how everything works to the exercises associated with. I wanted to come up with the best stuff. So whenever a player would walk into the weight room again, I'm formerly the water and towel and clean, the equipment guy. And now I would say, hey, can I take you through your core? And believe it or not, I was a young guy and I felt that I was very personable and players would give me a shot and they'd say, yeah, take us through it so I get these high profile players to give me a shot, take me through these little pieces of those core routine. Boom, take them through routine. After that, I had nothing left in my bag of tricks. But I started off by just offering the one thing that I knew and I got really good at that one thing, offered it to these guys, they bit the hook and then that opened up the relationship and when they started to trust me more and more, I was able to actually learn on the go and learn on the fly and, and deliver more and more. But yeah, again, I was totally overmatched. I mean, I'm dealing with a 19 year old kid dealing with guys that, you know, had, you know, 50, 100 plus million dollars. You know, they had fame galore, they were playing, you know, in the Big Apple and, and I had to step up to the plate and there was a lot of fake it till you make it. But I always leaned on, on my character and I leaned on just the areas that I knew I had strength and, and that was going to get confident at something and, and, and deliver. You know.

You know what, Dean, I love what you're saying here and there's just a couple gems that you've said. I hope people are really picking up and hearing this because what I heard you say without you saying it, you lost your dream. But instead of making that a failure, you were going to be a water and a towel boy. You put your ego aside, you're jumping in. You looked at that with opportunity and big eyes. You then studied and added value to people, which is by studying the core and adding value to them, they began to trust you. So you form trust and that is what truly ended up being this great opportunity for you. And I think so many other people would just shut down and snubbed their nose to. I'm not going to be a towel and a water boy or any of that. And you did none of that and actually added value, which is huge.

Yeah. And to be quite honest with you, I'm still a towel and a water boy in my mind. I always feel like if I have that, maintain that blue collar nature and realize, listen, nothing, nothing's going to be handed to you. Just keep going out there.

Servants mentality really.

Yeah, yeah, exactly. Just go out there and do things for the right reasons and all of a sudden, boom. More doors open up. More doors open up. And that's been the really the trajectory of my, of my entire career and it's been, it's just, you know, doors just keep opening up and I Just keep putting myself out there and saying, how do you help? How do you help? How do you help? So good. Yeah.

Okay, so take us into coaching now because so obviously you've totally blown away the world with your coaching style. So what makes a great coach now and then? What are the things that you've picked up and learned from the players? Like what makes a solid player? Like, what kind of coaching do they need?

What makes a great coach is somebody that can listen and can understand and also see what somebody's going through and dealing with without the other person actually verbalizing it. So to be a great coach, you have to have really high levels of intuition and feel, and you need to be able to really kind of align with that other person and understand their body language. Understand, again, the unspoken word. And if you could do that, you now have the basis of what your coaching relationship will be built on. And for me, that was the gift. You know, I am, as much as I am a strength and performance coach, and I'm trying to get guys bigger and faster and stronger and more mobile and all that. I also am a healer in what I do, in the fact that, you know, a technique that I, that I use is to help rid the body of discomfort and pain. So if I don't understand.

What is that?

Yeah. So as a high performer, if you're a high performing athlete, if you're a high performing executive, CEO leader or somebody that aspires to be right, you're typically going to be somebody that is exposed to higher levels of shame. Stress.

Yes.

Right. It's just stress in general. You know, stress of, hey, I'm a type A high horsepower person and I want to, I gotta get this done. You know, that sort of, that sort of mentality. But that stress that we have, it has to go somewhere. So oftentimes, if we don't express it and a lot of people don't express it, where does it go? Where does it, where does it go? It has to go somewhere, right? So it packs itself into the body, it packs itself into muscle tissue, it packs itself into the gut, it packs itself down. And in sport, it manifests itself as tension, overall tension in the body. So if you are somebody that's loaded with tension, you're also loaded with injury risk. Right. So what I would do is, again, we're working with these guys through a lot of, you know, you can call it cognitive behavioral therapy and dialogue and talking and understanding what's going on in their life. That's the first assessment of saying, hey, all right, Is he firing at 100% or is he packing tension somewhere? And then it's my job to go and find it. So through a lot of, like, trigger point techniques and a lot of, you know, manual therapy and tissue work, we were able to find areas in the body that would house this tension. You know, for most people, you know, you can simply say, well, it's in their shoulders. You know, when somebody comes behind you, they squeeze your shoulders and you say, ah, there's tension factor. But the greater the tension and the greater the stress you have in your life. That tension goes to all different places and that stress gets. It could be anywhere in the body. So we have to find it and most importantly, we have to release it. So that was my technique. Release it physically and also release it by getting them to understand through communication. And again, I'm dealing with guys that don't feel very comfortable, you know, sharing their weaknesses. These are gladiators that I work with. They're gladiators, yeah. They're not going to tell you the weaknesses, so you have to find them. And that's the same I found even too in the world of business. Same thing. You know, so many people are dealing with them.

Like, are you the one talking to them and getting it out that way and actually working on them physically, or do you have other people that you, that you do that, do that for you?

I do that. I do. I do that. And, and what I found is as you release more and more tension in the body, all of a sudden the words start coming out more and more because you're taking somebody into a state of relaxation and you're kind of downshifting their nervous system in a way that they haven't experienced in a long time. So it's creating an open forum of, let's say, vulnerability. And they're able to now feel not threatened because you release their physical tension and their physical pain and it gets them to go, this is safe here. And then they have the opportunity to express. So before I get to like the speed, strength and the power and what I call the sexy stuff, this is where I start the journey. And that's what creates a really dynamic experience.

Wow. So do all of your players that you coach know this with you? Do they do this with you?

Oh, yeah. And in different, and, and in different degrees. And with some players, it's not like a, it's not a public announcement, like, okay, here's, here's this system that I'm going to take you through and you know, you just organically Take them through it. You start with a conversation you do and then you, you, before you know it, they're, they're going through this process. I try not to, like, I'm not going to disclose the whole process to them because they may feel like, you know, feel a little bit manipulated. And I want it to be very organic and to unfold on its own layer.

It's like, we're going to work on you and then, you know, this stuff is going to come out and you're going to direct it out. But you don't start with that or it'll run.

Yeah, I lead with the, hey, we're going to keep you healthy, we're going to get you, keep you on the field. You're going to feel really good. This is, you know, I lead with all the performance indicators that they're looking for and the performance markers that they want to enhance. And then this is step one of the process and I come in with this.

Got it? Gosh.

Yeah.

I like it. I like it.

Yeah.

Okay, so I'm looking at your book right now, which by the way, I'm going to put a link. Everyone has to check out your book Habits of a Champion. And I like that your underlying word. Nobody becomes a champion by accident. Can we dive into some of those habits? Like, because I would love takeaways too that people can apply in their real life because I know even athlete mentality, athlete champions, some of those principles apply for people in business life. Anything that becomes successful.

Yeah, so, so when I wrote this book, just a little backstory on it, there was a couple things driving it. Number one was, you know, I would read a lot of. As a coach, you're always trying to better yourself as a leader, you're always trying to better your mentality and you're always looking for, you know, little nuggets and pieces that you can take and add to your overall practice. So I would read a lot of these self help book leadership books and I would say, you know, I read this book and I feel so far from goal. I feel so far successes is, you know, to my right. I feel like it's 10 miles to my right when I'm around very successful people both in the world of business and in the world of sport every single day. I mean, I'm talking the top 1% and I'm saying, you know, when I'm with these guys, I don't feel that, that far away outside of the talent that they have. But some of these books would make me feel as if I was so far off and that if I didn't adopt these principles, I wasn't going to make it. So I said, you know what? Here's what I'm going to do. I'm going to write a book that's about the habits of the champions that I was fortunate enough to work with personally, day in and day out, and show people that it's not about finding this magic formula, Right? It's really just about these little, little things that make you a champion. And a lot of us have those championship attributes right inside of us already. We just have to make the decision that we're going to choose to activate them, or if we're just going to choose to go about life the way we decide to go about life. And some of us, how we're brought up, we have a lot of these traits that we're executing on and firing on every single day, but some of us don't. We choose not to. So there's one example in the book that says if somebody doesn't respect your time, they don't respect you. And that was spoken by Derek Teeter. And Derek Keeter would always say, listen, if I'm going to be even a minute late, I'm going to call or text, because if I don't do that, I'm not respecting your time. And if I don't respect your time, I don't respect you. And there's a story wrapped around that about a player that left me in the weight room waiting for him for an hour.

Wow.

And was a. Was a no show, and that catalyzed that story. But, Derek, everything's about an appointment and everything's about respect, about being on time. If you're not a time call, it's the right thing to do. And that shows that I respect you, you respect me, and we now can play together. So that. That's one of the stories. There's another chapter in there called Fit to Win. And so many people in sports, less so in sport, but more so that I saw in business, think that they could just go out and play the most competitive sport in the world, which is business, and be untrained physically. So how many business people do we see running around airports, you know, and they're out of shape. They have an Annie Anne's Pretzels in one hand and they have a Coke in the other, and they're running to their flight, they're tripping over their briefcase or whatever they're dragging with them, and they're trying to build a business for themselves or Somebody else. Like that's not the person we want representing us. Because eventually those lifestyle habits and behaviors, it's gonna cost that person energy, it's gonna cost them health. They're not gonna represent themselves or the company the right way. So Fit to Win is saying simply a question, are you fit to win? And then I go through the, you know, I guess we'll say, if you're not fit to win, here's some of the things that could happen to you and here's the negative. So I just, I break it down into little micro lessons that could be picked up anywhere, any chapter, and you can pull something out of it. Yeah.

So I have a few specific questions about your book. Things you brought up I'd love to dive into. So you said off days or off days. What do you mean by that?

So how many, how many of us actually schedule off days? You know, most people I see, they just, they go and go and go or they don't respect a full day off. They're always trying to get a little bit of work in and a little bit here and a little bit there. So the best athletes in the world, they take the day, they take the day off. They don't do anything work related because that's a day for them to just totally unwind. And I also had a client that I work with, he's a multibillionaire and he takes, takes off every Friday afternoon through Sunday and no technology. Friday through Sunday, Friday through Saturday evening. Wow. And he said that's the time for him to restore his body and his mind, you know, and time with his family.

Yeah, I do believe that I have seen a common thread with ultra successful people with. They take that time fully off to resharpen the tool. Because if you're constant, go, go, go, you're never 110% when you are on. You're always just getting.

And the scary part is you don't know. You start to forget what off is because you're always partially on. And I use an example of like an electronic. Like what would happen if you were to leave an electronic on for five years at a time, 10 years at a time, eventually it burns out. Well, the same thing happens with us as people. We just acknowledge it sometimes or sometimes we don't and we push through it. And now in the corporate world, there's all these talks and, you know, work life balance and, you know, mindfulness and all of this, all of these phrases that come about as a result of us just simply not having any balance in our Life. So off days are off days and, you know, some players. I was just with one of our players a couple weeks ago, and he said, listen, you know what my favorite days were? My favorite days were off days on the road. He said, I wouldn't even get out of bed. I'd watch movies, I'd have room service, and I would just totally relax and I'd play my best games the next day.

Dana, why do you think it's so ingrained in people that they, like that they. No days off, like, have to keep going. What does that come from, do you think? Because I think so many people are that way.

Yeah, I think a lot of it comes from just our culture. I mean, in general. I mean, think about you just taking an off day. You're saying, hey, you know what? I'm going to take an off day today, and it's a Saturday. I'm just going to take a day off. Saturday used to be a normal day off, Saturday and Sunday. But now we're constantly flooded with messaging, especially through the social channels, where, you know, if you're not working, somebody else is, or hustle is coming across your feed, or you're just somebody that's trying to take a day off. And now you're looking at your feed and you're seeing what somebody else has, and now you're saying, well, look what I have. This person, you know, must be working harder than me. And it gets you from relaxed mode to engaged mode. So. So it's. It's a dangerous space that we live in because we're constantly in comparison, you know, in comparison to others, and it engages us, and it keeps us engaged, and it keeps us feeling like, you know, we got to do more, got to do more, got to do more. But I work with a lot of CEOs and executives, and I asked them this. I said, hey, can you define success for me in your terms? And you'll be amazed at how many people can't even do that. And, you know, and it's. And that's like one of the first exercises I do when I work with, you know, the corporate population. And. And they can't do it, or they'll pull somebody else's definition. And you have to say, no, no, no. What's your definition? They can't define it. So we're constantly, you know, in this. In this loop, and we're in this wheel, and I believe that that's. In it inhibiting us from being able to. To relax and fear and, you know, the classic fear, you know, Am I enough? Am I going to be able to make it? You know, am I going to have enough money packed away? All of these fear driven questions and responses keep us engaged. And you know, especially for those of us that live, you know, where you live or where I live in New York, it's a pressure cooker.

Yeah. And I can completely relate to. I think you just described me. I think you must have been spying on me this week because that's what I do. Today is totally off. Then you scroll Instagram or Facebook and you're like, oh, but they're doing this, they're doing that. I need to be doing the next thing you know, you're back in it. So I'm speaking of myself and I know that I'm not alone on that.

No, you're, you're definitely not. And how many people actually go on their social media and feel somewhat tired after being on there? I know I do. Yeah. I'm on there too long. Yeah. And a classic thing, another exercise that I do with people is listen, tell me the last five things you saw on social media and give me some details of it. What did you see? Tell me about it and describe it for me. Last, last thing. 9 out of 10 people can't tell you. So what does that mean? It's like. Yeah, so, so we're, we're taking in content, but what's happening? The brain is not processing the content because there's too much coming at us too quick. That there's a discrepancy in speed. So we're. Our scrolling speed versus our processing speed. They're disconnected, they're not, they're not aligned.

Yeah.

We're scrolling faster than we could process, but we keep scrolling. It's a bizarre thing.

It's so good, you know, gosh, I never had it really described like that. And you're so on point with that. And it's just adding extra junk into it. It's worse than tv. I feel like at least with TV you've got like one thing at a time. This is like quick changes of things we can't control.

Exactly. Control out there that could, that could turn. I don't. As fast as, as I see like, like scroll through, you know, the feed. It's amazing.

Wow. Wow.

Yeah. But there. But that creates anxiety, you know.

Oh, for sure, for sure. And the not doing enough symptoms and that. And you know, and I also am willing to bet that most people that can break away when you truly do just do your own thing and you're out in Nature, whatever it is that you're doing, that's not work. You, that's probably when your best ideas actually come, when you're not comparing to somebody else, when you're clear.

100%. And the other thing is too, when it comes to that, that whole comparison game, that's the fastest way to not achieve a champion performances comparing to other people. Because you're going to be, you're just, you're going to, at some point along the line, even if you are copying them and it's working, you're going to find that you're out of alignment with yourself and you're going to say, you know what, man, I'm not truly, you know, doing what I feel like I should do, every nuance of it. So it's all about self expression. And that's, that's the key. And that's, that's what makes athletes so great, is they're raw, they're in your face, they say things that are, you know, rough and could cause a little bit of conflict, but that's who they are and they own it 100%. If you don't like me, too bad.

And I'd also be willing to bet that these athletes that are uber successful, they're actually doing the work and practicing, they're not on social media posting about it and comparing about it, so.

No, exactly. No, they're just, you know, they're living, they're living, they're living their life. They're living their life and, you know, sharing some of their stories, but they're not scrolling back, they're not looking at what other people are doing because, you know, again, that's where I think some of the high levels of confidence that they have and even a little bit of ego and a dab of the narcissism comes in because they really don't care what anybody else is doing.

Yeah, no, it's probably serving them well though, to not care. So you also mentioned sometimes you have to go backwards to move forward. What do you mean by that?

Yeah, so, you know, we're so conditioned to always be running forward and running hard, and then all of a sudden, sometimes, like I said earlier, you smash that wall, and sometimes that wall, it doesn't always spin you right away into that next best thing for you. Sometimes that wall comes at you, it smacks you and you have to sit for a while on the sideline and say, all right, what the heck am I supposed to do now? And, you know, I'll share a story about that, but in 2014. My, you know, the way it works in Major League baseball is your contracted. So every year you get, get a contract for a year, two years or three years. So back in 2014, you know, we had a losing season and my contract didn't get renewed. So here it is, my dream job with the Yanks. I got it as a 23 year old kid. I'm the youngest strength coach and performance coach in sports. Living the dream, traveling with the Rolling stones through my 20s. And all of a sudden I get, I'm sitting with the GM and he tells me, dana, listen, here's the thing. He's like, it's not personal, it's just the way it works in business and sports. He's like, we got to make a change, and we're making a change now. So I, in 2014, I smacked the wall and the wall pushed me back and I had to go figure my life out, right, because I left college, I jumped into the Yankee universe. I'm traveling around the country, you know, hanging with high profile people, and all of a sudden, boom, you hit the wall and you got to figure your life out. You're forced now again, but 10, 12 years later to figure your life out. And you have all these experiences and all these different things now, and you got it. I had to take that step back to take a step forward. And at that point, you have to get really real with yourself. And it's a scary place to be, but you know, in doing so, it makes you better. So I always encourage people, you know, when, after you take a hit in any way, you know, and it could be anything, it could be a medical hit, it could be a, you know, an accident. Any, anything that happens. Getting laid off from a job, a divorce, a relationship, whatever it is, don't start running again. Because when you start running again, you're gonna miss a lot of the lessons that you're supposed to experience. You know, it's like people say, oh, when you get hit and knock down, get right back up, you get back up. But, but don't start running. Start crawling, then walking, and eventually you'll start running and start sprinting again. Yeah, if you start running, you're gonna miss a lot of the lessons and you're gonna kind of try to override those natural and normal feelings that you have. And that's when things get, get dangerous because you have to feel that stuff and in doing so, that's, that's the real. And you can come back to yourself. And that generates a lot of strength.

Yeah, no, I That's great advice. I love that. I love that. Okay, a few. Few questions about champions. And this could be any of your clients or yourself or the athletes that you worked with. I'm curious, like, what types of people do champions surround themselves with?

Well, they oftentimes don't surround themselves with anybody but their family. Yeah, that's. That's something. Yeah, that. That I've. That I've seen a lot. I mean, when the higher you go up the chain, the smaller the circles are. I mean, typically, everybody that I've seen, you know, that. That's in. That's in my circle, it. It's pretty much family and maybe, you know, a couple people that have been in their life for. For a long, long time.

Interesting. Is that a trust thing or a time thing or what? What's the reason with that?

I think it's a combination of both. But I also believe that they realize that they can't be everything for everybody, so they keep the people close to them that they want to share their time with, their knowledge, their experiences, and everything else. But there's only so much that they can give as people. And I think when we start to have too many people surrounding us in our circle, we are going to feel like we're cutting somebody short. And how does that feeling make us feel now? Does it make us stronger? Does it make us weaker? Because every champion wants to feel strong and powerful. So if we're not able to give what it is that we feel we need to give or want to give or should give, it kind of puts a little bit of damage in your armor. So the small circles and it's. It's. Every one of them, actually, they. They fly. A lot of them fly solo. Yeah, solo. And just. Just the family and a few people that have been around for a long time. Yeah. And then they're quick to.

What?

Yeah, I was gonna say they're quick. Quick to cut.

Oh, it's a cut.

Yeah.

Like, cut people out.

Yeah, yeah, yeah. People that. I don't want to say. Not people that don't serve them, but people that don't serve them well. Yeah.

Got it. And then I have a question, and this is something I ask everybody on my show. So I'm curious what you would say, what your answer is going to be on here. So if somebody's at rock bottom, maybe it's like you. Like, they found out at age 19 that they're not going to be a pro player. Maybe that's was your rock bottom at the time. Or maybe it's you know, later on in their career, whatever they're working on is not going the way that they thought. They've had a huge financial hit. They've, you know, their marriage fell apart, something rock bottom. And I'm sure you've dealt with this not only in your own life, but with the people that you've coached. If you were to give them three pieces of advice on how they can actually start to level up and create everything from nothing, what would you tell them to do first?

The first thing is to figure out what it is that you want and, and start there. Because again, a lot of the people that I've coached, they can't. They don't know what they want, and they. They're doing things for reasons that they can't even describe. And it's usually something deep within them that, that was maybe formed, you know, years and years before they actually hit rock bottom, that they feel that they think that there's a gap and they can't. They can't close their own gap, you know, so you got to get really clear on what you want.

Okay.

Sometimes you don't. You don't need as much as you think you need. So.

Yeah.

So the biggest thing is wherever you are and whenever you hit that rock bottom moment, you have to get real with yourself. You have to really think about the things that you want and that you need. And I do an exercise with everybody, another one that says, you know, typically financial stress is a big thing for people. I say, do me a favor, write down how much you're making now, and let's figure out to live that dream life that you want. Write that down. And they realize that the number that they think they need is not actually as big as the number that's actual.

Wow.

And I think that goes for a lot of things, you know, in your life. It's. Most people hit rock bottom and get stressed and flustered over it because they're trying to climb, you know, Mount Everest when there's just a little hill they have to get over. And you can climb Mount Everest and you can climb the hill by taking just a little bit of steps every single day. I related to chopping down a big oak tree with a little ax. There's no way you're going to go out there and chop that tree down in one day. But if you chop a little today, chop a little tomorrow, chop, chop, chop. Over time, that big tree hits the ground. So that's how you overcome anything in your life. And, you know, I always say, get real with yourself and the rest will sort itself.

I love it. Okay, so your book Habits of a Champion. Where can people get it?

They can get it on Amazon or they could get it on my website danacavalia.com and for anybody on the show they could just put VIP discount and it takes 20%.

Nice.

Yeah.

Dana thank you so much. Super eye opening. Thanks for your time.

Thank you. Thanks for having me.

Thanks for leveling up with us today. Please share this episode if you found it helpful so others can join in. And don't forget to hit that subscribe so you don't miss out on future shows. And if you would leave me a five star review. I appreciate those so much. I read all of them and it's how how I know that I'm giving you information that you find valuable and come interact with me over on Instagram at nataliejlfit. I read all the direct messages and comments over there. Make it a great day. Creating everything from nothing.