059: From Being Raised In Poverty to Living a Fairy Tale with Maja Sly

Hi, I'm Natalie Jill, fat loss expert turned high performance coach. When odds are stacked against us, how do we shift and create everything from nothing? How do we level up when we aren't feeling it yet or we've had a big setback? On this podcast, I'll be talking to some of the most inspiring and courageous men and women on this planet who at their worst, learned how to achieve success greater than they ever dreamed possible. Leveling up and creating everything from nothing. Growing up in poverty all around and in the middle of violence and chaos, Maya didn't have the fairy tale childhood or family life. With a mom in and out of prison and a dad out of the picture, Maya used to count down the days until she would be old enough to leave. She describes feeling like she was in the wrong family and that her real family was going to come find her one day. Fortunately, Maya did have an uncle just 10 years older than her that became her biggest fan. That uncle was her guide and supporter, telling her consistently that she can be anything she wants to be in life. She believed that uncle, and she just knew that one day she would make something incredible of her life. Fast forward to today and Maya is a serial entrepreneur, real estate broker, business coach, and television personality. Everything Maya touches turns to gold. Maya Sly. She's the total example of how to continually level up and create everything from nothing. Today on Leveling Up, I've got Maya Sly. Maya, I am so excited to have you here because I heard you speak recently at Eric Thomas event and oh my gosh, you knocked the whole audience's socks off, including mine. I just wanted more. I wanted to be in your space more. You are such an example of somebody who has continually leveled up and created everything from nothing. So thank you so much for being here and being willing to talk to me, my audience.

Thank you so much for having me. This is so sweet.

So when you look at your stuff online right now, you're just. You are a go getter. You've achieved so much. You have so many things that you do so well. You look like this incredible success that people can't even touch. You just look so incredible. But I know for you, it didn't always start out that way. That's not where you came from. You had a very different past. And I'd love to know who you were before all of this.

Well, what's interesting is I'm still the same person. I'm the same person I was then as I am now. And all the things that I've been able to Accomplish actually came from all of those things. It was just I evolved into this person, and I guess almost like a metamorphosis, it was for me, using every single challenge that happened to me. I look at my life now, and I know it didn't happen to me, but for me. So I come from extremely humble beginnings. We were. I mean, we were just in poverty. I grew up in a. I was born in a housing project and raised in a trailer park. So I always joke. They're like, they have black people in the trailer parks. I was like, yeah, in Panama City, they do. So I am from a very interesting city. I'm from a tourist town. It's a beach city. So it's. I was. I was around money, saw so much money and wealth, but we were not. And just merely seeing other people being able to have that was really what inspired me to go after it for myself, because I felt like if they could have it, then clearly there had to be a way that I could, too, so. And I learned that early. Very early.

Yeah. So when you were a kid and you said you were trailer park and you didn't have any money, you were. It was poverty, but you're seeing it around you. What was your family's reaction about money? Like, did they say, that's for other people? Did they believe that you could have it one day? How did they talk to you about it?

Well, I grew up. My mother was in and out of prison, so I lived with my grandmother, and I had her son, which was my uncle. He was only 10 years older than me, but I swear to God, and I mean this, I tell anybody this, he literally was only put on this earth for me. I know that because he was only 10 years older than me, but he was wise beyond his years. And he was a raging, flaming homosexual. Gay, loud and proud. Before it was politically correct. He walked in his own truth. He embraced it, and he made no apologies for who he was. So he really taught me how to really believe in myself very early on. So because he was loud, proud, and gay in a majority white town, most of his friends were rich white kids that lived on the beach. And he was exposed to so much. And by his exposure, he exposed me. So everything their little sisters did, he put me in. So he paid for my dance lessons, he paid for my gymnastics, he paid for my cheerleading because he was a hairstylist. And so back then and even today, that's why I'm in the hair industry to this day, because of my uncle. My uncle was a working stylist. And you could make so much money without having a college education. And. And because of that, he made money, and he spent his money on me. So for a long time, he exposed me to things that we could not afford. Like, cheerleading was $1,000 a year back then. Like, my grandmother made $3.35 an hour. She thought my uncle was fat crap crazy. She was like, what in the heck are you doing? How in the world are you? Like, why are you doing this? This is nuts. But he was one of those people, just hush. Get out of my way. I've got her. So I was his number one project. And he would tell me every single day my mom was in and out of prison. He had sisters that were near to wells as far as he was concerned. They wasted all their good looks. And he said, not on my watch will you fail. And that was it. He said, not on my watch. And he. And he meant that like, he was serious about it.

So it's interesting. So it's like you had this uncle, 10 years old, that just really believed in you. Do you think that played a big role in why?

Oh, God. Just. Oh, God, Yes. He believed in me before I believed in myself. He would wake me up. I mean, he was my number one hype man. I mean, he hyped me up every single day to believe that I could literally do anything. He would just say, oh, my God. Oh, God, you're gonna kill him today. Oh, you're gonna kill him today. And I would be like, me? What? Like how? I was 8, 7, 8, 9 years old, and I remember one day I was on the playground, and these kids were teasing me, and a girl had found out that my mom was in prison. And, like, back then, nobody's mom was in prison, and nobody lived with their grandmother. So it was kind of one of those things. I had to kind of figure out what the story was that I was gonna tell. So I would just say that my mom lived in Miami. Well, she was in Miami, just in prison in Miami. You know, I looked at that detail, and someone found out. I guess they overheard, you know, their parents talking about something, and they teased me about it, and it hurt my feelings so bad. And I went home crying. And my uncle said, why are you crying about that? Your mom is in prison. Like, why are you crying? Because they're teasing you about that. He said, the next time they say something to you about your mother, just say so. I said, huh? He said, so, s o. He said, what's going to be their comeback after that? Don't let people shame you for something that you have no control over. You own it. And he taught me to own my mistakes. He taught me how to not walk in someone else's shame. And. And he basically told me, this is up to you, Maya. What you do with your life is going to be completely up to you. You're not going to be able to blame your mother for everything. So it is up to you to decide what you want your life to look like. So I would say, why don't you put. People would always say to me, oh, just like your mother looked. Just because my mother was gorgeous. And I would always say, no, I don't. No, I don't. And he said to me, he stopped me one day. He said, why do you always do that? I said, do what? He said, why do you always say you don't look like your mom? When people say that, he's like, you have a beautiful mother. I said, I don't want to look like her. I don't want to be anything like her. And he said to me with the straight face, he said, that's going to be up to you to decide.

Wow.

He said, you looking like her is not going to make you like her. He said, your decisions and your choices are going to determine that, sweetheart. And that was a lesson at nine and a half, and I never forgot it.

What a wise, amazing uncle mentor you had. I mean, just incredible.

Oh, my God. Oh, Jesus. Have so many stories about him, sweetie. He's like a person you eulogize. I only tell the good stories because also he was also a habitual fat shamer, a raging cokehead, completely verbally abusive. I was his indentured servant. I worked at the salon for free.

You know, it's just so amazing how whatever a person. Whatever a person goes through, and it's just. It's really incredible listening to this. Like, you really could have defined your life so differently. Like, my mom's in prison, my uncle's a addict, all this stuff. But you heard those possibilities in your. Through him or initially. And like, what you did with that is just incredible. So, okay, so you're 8 or 9 years old. You start believing that there's more to life. There's more. And you start seeing that you can change this in your mindset. You can change this. So when was your. What was your first job like, where you. You realized you have this, like, special talent where you really could start monetizing and being creative? Because it looks like everything you touch just turns to gold. So what Was your first idea there?

Well, at ten. So that nine and a half year old me. So this is where my life changed. It's the most defining thing that ever happened. And my mom got out of prison. She came home and she got into a fight with my other uncle's girlfriend and basically almost beat her within an inch of her life. Violence was just. I was. It was violence and chaos all the time. And I just was like, these people are just. I literally thought that I was switched at birth. I thought my real parents were going to come and get me one day. I was like, there's just no way I'm related to these people. Right. There's just.

No.

As a child, I literally thought that I was just switched at birth. Remember those after school specials they would have and people would be switched at birth? I swore that was me. I was like, yeah, my real family is gonna come and get me one day. They have to be looking for me. They have to know by now that that other child isn't there.

Yeah.

And my mom, I lived in a housing project at this point and we lived in the cul de sac. And so when she went to prison, they carted her off to jail. So the entire subdivision complex was outside watching her being taken off in handcuffs. I looked at her from a second story window. Second story window. I'll never forget it. A day of my life. I had a pink bedspread with the white little tassels that hang at the bottom. I sat down on the side of that bed. I turned on Irene Kara. What a feeling. You know how he says, first there's nothing but a slow going dream? And I say, this will not be my life. This will not be my life. And I did. I started doing a countdown. I've always been a numbers person. I looked at the calendar that was on my wall and I said, I only have six more years here and then I can leave. Six more years here and then I can leave. I watched her go to prison. And then I started my first business that summer. I started selling freeze cups. And so it's like a frozen Kool Aid. So Kool Aid that you. It's like a drink with sugar that you make. Yeah. Remember the Kool aid, man? Yeah. I started selling those frozen and I sold them for 10 cents each. And that summer I made $500 selling freeze cups that summer so that I could now pay for my own clothes, my own cheer, my own everything.

Yeah. At age, man, that's like. That's huge.

Oh, it was crazy. But I didn't but I didn't. But I didn't make the 500 selling the freeze cups. I made the 500 being a loan shark. I loaned money. Yeah, I became the neighborhood really family lender. It started in my house and I would loan money to other people, but I would loan my aunts and uncles money and they had to pay me back. And the interest was 100% and it was non negotiable. Unbelievable. Non negotiable. Non negotiable. Non negotiable. Didn't matter if you borrowed the money on Monday or Thursday, had to be paid back on Friday because they got paid every Friday.

Okay.

And I made $500 that summer, and that was it. That's when I realized that you had power when you had money. I said, I can make my own decisions. I have a lot more control of the things that happen to me when I have my own money. So I started making money at 10 and I never stopped.

Wow.

I love this.

I love this. Okay, so then fast forward a little because I know I want to hear about the hair and the real estate because those two are so unique how you did that. And I want to, because these are two things that, you know, a lot of times people will say, well, I can only make money in this specific industry or this specific industry. And I want to share what you did in both those industries because there's. It's so unique how you went about it.

Well, it's quite interesting. And they both fed off of each other and they still do. So, you know, fast forward. I go high school, graduate from high school, go to college. My degree is in finance and I started working at a salon in college. So it was just something that I did. I wasn't going to be a hairstylist. I was. Had no interest at all in being a hairstylist. I really hated doing hair, to be quite honest, or at least I thought I did because I was a shampoo tech when I first started working in salon. So they treat the shampoo tech like crap. Well, I didn't realize that the stylus is worshipped. And so I started doing hair at home because I got an internship with an investment banker and doing hair at home, I could only work, you know, a few clients. But I made a lot of money doing hair on the side. I didn't have a license. I was doing them converted garage. And the girl that used to do my hair, she. She and I were talking one day and Walmart. And this is just how things happen, how things are divine. And I Look at my life like that. Everything happens exactly how it's supposed to. Even setbacks, even the challenges, even the hardships, it happens the way it's supposed to. So all of my friends got a job at Walmart except me. And so people would ask them who did their hair? And so they started saying, everyone keeps asking us who does our hair. It's okay if we give them your number. And I'm like, for what? Like, I'm not doing some stranger's hair. So I'm talking to the girl that does my hair, and I'm laughing with her about it, and she said, why wouldn't you do that hair, Maya? I was like, I don't want strangers at my house. She said, why? I was like, I mean, I don't want them stealing. She said, exactly what do you have that they're going to steal? And I started laughing at myself. I was like, yes, you're kind of right. She was like, yeah, you can make a lot more money if you did more clients on those two, three days instead of just doing your friend's hair for darn near free. I was like, you know what? So I got some business cards made and told them to give them out. So I started doing hair at home. And so within about six months, I was fully booked every single night. And so I'm driving down the street one day, this is before cell phones, and someone is bumping their horn like a maniac. What is going on? And then I hear someone say, maya, Maya. And I look over. It's the guy salon I used to work at as a shampoo tech. And he's like, pull over. And so we pull over, and I was like, oh, hey, Eric. How are you? Da, da, da, da. And he was like, I've been trying to get in touch with you, babe. I was like, yeah, I moved. He was like, I want you to come back and work for me. And I said, little snarkiest comment. I. Oh, God, Eric, I'm not coming back to work for you. I have my own clients now. He said, I know you're taking all of ours.

Oh.

I said. And so I chuckled. I was like, eric, I'm sure I'm not taking all of your clients. He said, no, bae. He's like, your name is ringing. He's like, I want you to come back and work for me so you can get your license. I was like, I don't want to get a hair license. I don't want to do hair. He said, well, you're already doing hair, so you might as well get your license. I said, yeah, but I can't afford booth rent. He said, yes, you can. He was like, come and work for me. He's like, call me on Monday. He's like, I'll take care of you. He's like, I want you to come and work for me. But those clients you're doing at home, you're not gonna be able to do anymore because they're not gonna pay salon prices. It's like, but I promise you, I got you. And so I called him that Monday for kicks and giggles, and he basically made me an offer I couldn't refuse. He was like, I'll give you all of my walk in clients, and if you don't make booth rent, you get to keep all your money. He was like, but if you do, then you'll pay both rent. He's like, I'm going to train you how to cut. I'm going to train you how to do everything. And you can get your license, but I need someone to handle my overflow traffic. My second or third. My third week. Third week. Third week working. I made $1,000 that week because it was our college homecoming. I never looked back. I said, oh, boy, who knew? So I worked in that salon for a year and some change. And when it was time for me to graduate, I was interviewing for jobs. The job offers were like, in the 30s. I made $50,000 my senior year of college. I was like, I'm not going to work for that little bit of money. And it was really. This was another defining moment. I had an opportunity to take a job or follow my own dreams and passions and find my way. And that's what I did. And it about broke my grandmother's heart. She just. I thought she was gonna fall off the floor because she was like, you're not gonna take that good job. And I'm like, lady. Like, she had no idea how much money I made. But she also had no point of reference because of my uncle. My uncle made a lot of money, but he was also a raging cokehead, so he never had anything to show for his money. And so her thought process for stylist was, okay, they make money, but that's not a profession. She didn't look at it as a profession. You went to college and now you want to work in a salon? Like, she looked down upon it because she just didn't have an idea of what it really was as a profession. Because my uncle didn't treat it like a profession. It was just his money that so then I.

And I know you didn't stop there. You ended up with your own salon. And because you. Because you didn't. But what I thought was fascinating too is that you shared how you had this dream of working in a specific salon. And when the assumes you would if you could share that, like how you, you assumed that you were just gonna get a job there. And then when you were disappointed what you did and what you became because.

Of that, well, you have to remember my uncle told me that I was the best thing since sliced bread since I was four. So, of course, everything I tried out for, audition for, I always made. I'd never not been picked for anything. I didn't even know what that was like. Like, I had to deal with that in my life, with my mother. But outside of that, everything I went after, I got. And this was the first time in life that I went on an audition for something and they said, no, not so much, because I was a big fish in a small pond coming from a smaller market. And so when I didn't get the job at that salon, I was devastated. But I had no choice because I had to get a job somewhere. So I went and worked at a salon four miles away that didn't have the same aesthetic. And that was what was even more defining. Because if I'd gotten a job at that first salon, which was the most high end salon in Buckhead at the time, I would. I would never have opened my own salon. Within a year and a half, I moved to Atlanta, started working in a salon in June. The salon that, the second salon that I interviewed at, and they hired me and they opened, I started working there in June, and I opened my own salon the following October. Wow.

Now, what's funny, what stood out to me too, is that you said, you said I wasn't even that good at hair. I was just good at talking to people and they liked me.

Yeah, I was good at customer service. So when I say not good, I wasn't great. I wasn't the best stylist. I was a good stylist. So I did. I mean, my work was good, but my finish was great. My presentation, my own personal presentation. So I got better. And they liked me. They liked my service, they liked the way that I could get them in and out. They liked that I was always on time. They liked my efficiency, and they liked the fact that I didn't do shop talk, meaning I didn't gossip. I didn't, you know, get involved in silly conversations on the floor. It was just Me engaged with my clients and really getting to know my clients. And really as a stylist. And I knew this from my uncle. You're like their therapist. So, you know, I was always wise beyond my years. I was always a little adult when I was a child. So the things that my clients were experiencing, I already experienced way worse than the things they were talking about. So I always gave them a different perspective and when they would get down on themselves about things. So that was really how I grew my business, by service. And I realized that you don't have to be the best to be the best. I became an amazing stylist. But when I initially started in my 20s, I was just good. I wasn't great.

Yeah, yeah. That's amazing. So it just shows that out that what you believe, what you share, connecting with people, being of the service mindset, you can just achieve extraordinary things. Now what's really fascinating to me is how you then built and grew a huge real estate side of things because of the salon.

Oh my God. So I opened that salon in 1998 and I got my real estate license in 2001 on September 11, September 11, 2001, when the planes were crashing. Wow. And again, life defining. And it was for me that day, for me to get my license that day, because everyone else who I took my test with was like, oh my God. Oh, the economy is going to be so bad, blah, blah, blah. Well, I'm a student of history. I know that in times of war the economy is on fire. So I was like, oh my God, I am going to kill it. The first year I sold 44 houses. Not a website, not a lot of marketing dollars, only my business card handed out to every single person in the salon. I had a 10 share salon. So not only did I sell to my clients, but I sold to other people's clients of the salon and referral. So the 44 closings that I had that year, every single closing came from the salon. Either a salon client or a salon referral. 44 houses. My first year out the door, I couldn't believe it.

Did you ever think when you were getting a real estate license that you were going to be selling to your salon customers? Or were you thinking, I'm going to have a marketing budget?

No, no, no, no, no. Absolutely. I knew I was going to sell to my salon customers because that's how I even got started. I started selling. I only got started in real estate because when I bought my house, I'm a person, I share information. I got a grant to buy in a neighborhood that was being gentrified. So I got a $10,000 grant. So I started giving my clients the same information. And I referred probably four or five clients to an agent. She didn't even send me as much as a thank you card. And so I just did the numbers and said, well, the class is only six weeks. I found one that you could go for 13 days from nine to five. I was like, I'll get my own license and I'll start selling clients to my own clients instead of giving them to her. Because my degrees in finance, I knew the numbers. Piece of finding the house was easy. I knew the finance side, so I knew that I would sell to my clients. That I think I was going to sell to as many clients. Absolutely not. I had no idea I was going to be that.

I love the whole theme of with you that like one, you, first of all, you find opportunity where other people do not. And that you just are so customer service oriented that that really has just served you well. Like, you listen and you understand people's needs. Like even dating back to when you were a kid and you said you were a loan shark, you did that out of listening to people's needs. You figured out, okay, they need money. I have a way to be able to loan it to them and make money. And it's you being customer service oriented and listening seems to serve you over and over again.

Oh, absolutely. I thank my younger self for that. But I also really thank mindset. I mean, I had to get my mindset right at a very early age. There was no way I was going to be able to be as successful as I was in middle school and high school. Like, I was captain of everything. I couldn't be if I didn't have an officer position. I didn't want to be a part of it because I'm just a bossy pants. I didn't want to be bothered. I just thought everybody else was like, oh, God, they're going to look these meetings one too long that to be bothered with that. So I'll just do it. And so for me, it was more. So everything that I do in life has just transferred into something else. And so when people say, oh, everything you touch turns to go, I fail more than I win, but my wins are astronomical. I'd love to hear more about.

Yeah, I want to hear more about the failures. Like, what? So you said you fail more than you win. How do you look at failures now and are there? Can you give us an example of like, defining Failure. And what, how you change that?

Oh, my God, absolutely. So I have a lot of wins. I had a lot of wins back to back. So coming out of college, opening, you know, a salon, within a year, I was 24 and a half when I opened my first location. I was making six figures very quickly and just traveling all over the world and, you know, getting married and marrying a doctor and, you know, just really living my life on, I mean, just living my best life, as they say. And then, you know, the economy tanked, it crashed. And there was nothing that I could do different to make my real estate business change. I closed my first month, so I had a salon for 10 years. And so when I closed that salon in 2010, the economy crashed in, oh, eight is when we really felt the hit in the housing market. And there was nothing that I could do to sell more houses because lending had changed and prices were down and people were short selling. So it was like I'd have to work twice as hard to still try to figure out how to make even anywhere close. I was closing 10, 15 deals a month with my eyes closed. So at the height of the market, I was doing my biggest year. I did a million dollars, almost a million dollars in real estate commissions. I did $997,000 in closed transactions. So that is knocking them out the park. Yeah, it was just banging them out. I had subdivision, so I would work with builders and developers and I had all of their listings, so I had a captive audience. And so when the market tanked, I had to look at what in the hell am I going to do now? Because the salon was not generating me that type of money. Like I had a booth rental salon at that time. So that's a different type of concept than I have now. You can only net so much. So for me to replace $100,000 a month or $80,000 a month in a market that's down. I was married at the time, so I was in a very good position that I didn't have to work as hard. But I've always been extremely independent, extremely goal oriented. So that was a sucker punch for me in my gut, like, what do I do? And so, you know, I kind of tried to figure my way out and find out how I was going to sort of for about a year and some change, I really worked more on my ex husband's business and building his medical practice and built that practice to be amazingly successful. Successful with him, just showing him how to do the business side of it and how to grow the business. And, you know, I did count that as a failure for me because I couldn't work on in my business in the same way. So when we. When I filed for divorce in 2011, that was a failure in my life at the time. I've never had anything like this happen. I thought everything bad that happens to someone was based on, okay, you screwed this up. And so this happened. I was so naive because of my family upbringing. All I saw were people who were making crap shows of their entire lives. So it's because they made bad decision after bad decision. I realized that bad things can happen to good people too. And so when I started going through my divorce, it was one thing after another, one thing after another. It was a very expensive divorce. It was a $400,000 legal fee divorce. So imagine, you know, the gut wrenching anguish that you have with dealing with all of that, and then you have to deal with the dissolution of what you thought your life was gonna look like. Like I had my. My happily ever after. So this is. Everything on paper looked amazing. We look like black kid and Barbie, like, could have a better life than this. It was devastating for me. And I had just opened my first location of the new brand that I have, which is Walk in Weaves. And so I opened that first location in October, opened a second location by February, open the third location by June, and then filed for divorce that August. So this is major setback for me because I am accustomed to now having a support system. And also my ex husband and I supported each other in our business. So when you're growing a business in the very beginning, you're making a lot of money, but you're spending a lot of money to grow that business.

Sure.

And so now I had to bootstrap my entire business and go through a divorce and still continue to get up, show up for myself and my staff at this time. So I just put my head down and I worked and I worked and I worked and I worked and I worked. And so I ended up with five locations by the time the divorce was over. And the divorce was final in June. And because I worked so hard during that time and I was so focused, I couldn't do anything but work. I wasn't paying attention to anybody, but clearly they were paying a lot of attention to me. And a reality show opportunity came and I didn't want to do it. I wasn't interested in doing a show like that, but they made me an offer I couldn't refuse. And so I started filming in September and grew the business and so we franchised locations and grew it. But television gave me the opportunity and a platform that I could have, could not have purchased every billboard in the city of Atlanta and do one television episode did for my business. Wow. So I count my failures and my losses the same. Because though my marriage failed, I felt like I was failing myself because I was. For 90 days in a space, I felt I was completely paralyzed with fear. Like fear of the unknown, fear of what's my life gonna look like? Fear of starting over, fear of all of it. And that failure for me really was a win because it changed me as a person. I always thought that I was strong, I always thought that I was ambitious. I always thought I was, you know, I believed in myself. But the belief in oneself when you have nothing to depend on but yourself is completely different as an adult. Because as a child, you're naive. Now I know what real bills look like. I know what real pain and anguish really looks like. And when I had to face that head on and figure out how to pay $20,000 payroll per week, that was sobering.

Yeah. And when it sounds, what I'm hearing from you too though is like you hear you grew up in this family that had just a mess of stuff happening and you learned from your uncle and through your mindset that you know what? It's not going to be me. It's not going to be me. I'm going to be powerful, I'm going to be successful. This is not going to be me. And then here you're dealing with something in your own life that feels like that it's throwing you back to what it felt like as a kid, probably.

Oh, absolutely.

It sounds like you proved to yourself again though, how strong you actually really are. Because you did come out ahead again, even as painful as that was.

Yeah. And I say it all the time when I do talks. I said, I thank my 10 year old self for every single thing that I'm able to do in life right now. I thank a 10 year old child because when I am back against the wall and all the chips are down, I always think of if she could figure it out, how to get out of that situation. I have a lot more life experience, I have a lot more access, I have a lot more everything. This adult Maya can certainly figure it out, but it all comes from that. So when, you know, people who have known me my entire life, they always say, oh, she's always been like that because I've always been the same person. But it was, I just evolved into Understanding how to use my setbacks and my challenges for myself. And I am, you know, experiencing a lot of change and a lot of things right now. But to the outside world, it doesn't look that way because I have a lot of moving parts to the things that I'm able to do and accomplish. And I think find opportunities. Where other people, where they see opposition, I look for opportunity. Where they see, you know, it can happen, I look for all the ways that it can happen. Yeah, it can be a benefit for you. So I think that's really probably my saving grace is that I look for the things that other people don't. And that's the bright side.

You clearly do. So I have a question about that. So you, you. You've done so many things and you have so many unique ideas, and you do continually find all these great opportunities. How do you see, decide, like, what to actually work on? Because even just talking to you right before we started recording, you're giving me an idea, and I can tell you're one of those people that just has all these amazing ideas all the time. How do you decide, like, what to shove aside and what to actually focus on and where to put your energy?

You know, it changes based on, you know, really how I feel. I think certain times of the year, I have a lot more energy and I'm a lot more energized to work on certain passion projects. So I create these planners and journals for other people's brands, and I started doing those because I'm an entrepreneur. And so when you get. When you get an opportunity to do a television show, you do a lot of press and you get the same questions over and over and over again. And so when people ask you the same thing over and over and over again, you. You have to start digging deeper to figure out, okay, it's not a can answer. It's, you know, you have to be thoughtful about this because it's going in print and you want to make sure they have a real clear understanding of who you are before they write about you. Yeah. And so, you know, people are like, how do you do all this? And when you do a lot, and I'm sure you realize this in your own business, it's not a lot to you because it's your life. So I don't think that I'm doing anything. I'm not on private jets every day. You know, I work for a living. So it's not like I'm some person that's rich and famous. I'm just a woman that gets up every day and believes in myself, and I go after what I want and I work for, But I never even realized how much I did until I saw it on television. I saw it play itself out in front of other people, and I was like, oh, my God, how did I do that? You know? But I'm just. I kind of grind it every day. And so I've always done a lot since a child. I could handle pressure.

So it doesn't feel like overwhelm to you. It just feels like, well, there's days that I can.

Well, there's days that it can be overwhelming, and I can, you know, just want to, you know, fall into a corner and cry. But I cry for a minute. I get back up and I dust myself off. But, you know, I focus my time and energy on things that one can make me happy. At this point, I've just decided that I just. I no longer want to do things that don't bring me some level of joy or some level of satisfaction and some level of something. It has to be more than just the money. So there are things that I. That I have to do that aren't sexy or pretty or fun, you know, So I love all these coaching clients, and they're like, you know, I don't have a balance or, you know, I haven't found my passion. I was like, sweetie, make some money and you'll find your passion along. You think I'm passionate? Passionate about, you know, figuring out how to do spreadsheets and how to do a marketing budget and, you know, like, it seems like there's a passion after, you know, you see me on 20 buses rolling down the street, but guess what? There's a bill that comes along with that. You know what I mean? So, you know, the things that grow your brand and grow your business aren't fun and sexy. Yesterday I was on a photo shoot set all day for not only my own brand, but my coaching clients, helping them launch their brand. And the client said to me, she sent me the sweetest message afterwards. She was like, maya. And she's known me for over 20 years. She was one of my first hear clients. And she came back to me. I hadn't seen her in years. And she booked a coaching session on my website. She didn't call me. She didn't just book the session anymore. I saw the name, I was like. And I called and I was calling to schedule the appointment, and she was like, hey, Maya. And I'm talking to her and I'm recognizing. I was like, Keisha, but her last name is Arnold. She divorced and remarried, so I didn't even know who it was when I was calling her. And I said, what did you. Coaching session. She was like, girl, I've been watching you since you were 24, 25. I've always seen you knock it out the car. Because I was like, hell, if I'm going to book a session with somebody, I'm going to go to somebody that I know can do it. And that was really a compliment. But after that, now her husband and her both have become my monthly coaching clients for Mastermind sessions. And so yesterday she called me. She was like, mine. She was like, I just want you to know that you are a beast. I was like, huh? You managed that day. It was like you didn't. It was like you didn't skip the beat. You were like. I was, like, in awe watching you work. And I was like, huh? I mean, didn't think anything of it. But when I watched the video footage back last night, because I was putting some stuff on social and, you know, I had to get dressed. I had to, because I had a shoot. I was shooting them. I had to go direct them for the camera because I knew the shots I needed to get for their brain. And I realized that, you know, God gives you gifts, but they're not just for you. They're for other people. And my gift is being able to see something people sometimes they don't see in themselves. And through that, I'm able to see other things inside myself that I didn't even know existed.

That's amazing. I love that. I love that. Do you? I have some other questions for you too. Do you ever care about what other people think? Does that ever get in your way or distract you?

Can you use profanity on this podcast? Yeah. When I hear my clients say, I don't want people to think I'm doing too much, I said, who are these people that you are referring to? Because they're not, certainly not your customers. So every single thing that I do serves a customer that I already have. So let me break it down to you so you understand that I'm not that. I mean, I'm bright, I'm smart enough, but I mean, I'm not a genius. I'm just a person that pays attention. So I own salon, right? I owned a salon. I started selling real estate to the clients that what are at the salon. I also sell insurance. Why? Because every person that purchases house needs what insurance. I sell hair. Why? Because I own a weaving salon. Every single person that comes to the salon has to what, have the product. Not jeans. Just a necessity. It's a product. It was an additional stream of income. That's it. So when I went on a television show, they gave me a platform. The platform allowed for other people to see me as a businesswoman. They started reaching out to me and they thought they were going to be on my phone asking me a bunch of freaking business questions all the time. And so I said, no, no, no, not doing that. Not gonna be on my phone all freaking day. So I created monthly sessions or hourly sessions that they could book me to be on the phone with me. But you were not going to pick my brain without me picking your pockets. Be very clear about that. You're pick your brain. No, this is my intellectual property. And I got here by the school of heart, not school of business. So you can talk to me for an hour and I can change your life. I can talk to you for an hour and I can restructure your entire business, but you're not going to talk to me for free. So that's how I started coaching. I didn't go anywhere to be certified to do this. I just simply look at the problem that other people look at and say, I can't get out of it. I say, well, yes, actually, you can. You can either walk away from the business, you can restructure your lease. There's so many things that you can do. So I started coaching because the women that reached out to me asked me for it. They asked me for it. I started becoming a speaker because people heard me speak and they asked me what was my booking fee. I created a booking fee by going online and seeing what other people charge for booking fees. It wasn't genius. I just said, if I'm gonna have this, then I'm gonna do it right. So I started personally branding when I created the Planner. I created the Planner because I knew that when I got booked to do something, I needed a product to sell. And people always ask me, when am I gonna write a book? Well, my story is so deeply personal that it is going to take. I want the right platform for me to write the book that I need to write. So I knew I would need a product to sell from the back of the room. It's called your back of the room sales. I've been going to conferences since I was 23 years old. I've been in personal development. I spent invested in myself, so I saw what other people did. So I got T shirts printed and I created A planner and a product for people. After I created the planner and the product for other people, I realized, oh, I can do this for other people. So it's not that I'm genius. I just saw that people will pay for the things that I know how to do. That's it.

I hope people are really listening to this, because what I really hear from you is you're a very good listener, and you're very in tune with what problems are out there. And you're a solution off. You come up with solutions for people. And I think a lot of people go into business or try to become successful just because. Just looking at it from a monetization standpoint of like, how can I make money? They approach with, how can I make money? Where you're approaching with what problems are out there, how can I add value, serve and solve? And then the money follows for you.

The money will come. If you can solve problems, you can always make money.

Yeah. Which is just brilliant. Oh, my gosh. I could talk to you all day, but I have two more questions I have to ask you before we run out of time.

I want to know.

I want to know, like, I'm curious how you spend your time.

I.

Obviously you work hard, and you. That's a big part of your time, but do you have, like, a routine that you do for the morning or the night? Like, how. How do you spend the majority of your time? Or is it really all work? Like, what.

What is that?

That helps?

No, no, it's def. No, I play a lot. I play, but I have to, you know, work myself into the ground. And then I'll take some days. I usually do a big trip every September, so that's when I go to Europe. But.

Okay.

I've started taking more trips more frequently that weren't just about business because I have to travel and do work stuff. So I try to combine them both. But my routine is in the mornings. I get up, I turn on Eric Thomas or Tony Robbins or some motivational speaker in the background, and I listen to that in the morning. I coach my clients in the morning. So I do a hike in the mornings almost five, six days a week. And that is my morning routine. So I kill two birds with one stone. So I stack my clients and I'll do two calls back to back, or sometimes three, depends on how early we start. And I'll do my coaching clients and my hike at the same time. So I get my workout finished. Great. Get showered, dressed. If I'm not seeing clients, then I have a Uniform, and it's Lululemon. So I am in my office, no makeup, and we plow our day out. If I have to see clients that day, then I get dressed for my day, and I come in my office, and I work five days a week. I work in my office, at my desk five days a week. That is what I do. So I work through most of my time spent in thought. I don't do a lot of physical work. Yeah, most of it is executing on ideas, figuring out ways to solve problems, figuring out ways to make our business better, figuring out my next move. My next move. We are opening a medical practice for cancer patients. It's the same thing that we do in the beauty industry, but we will now be serving patients and not customers. And it's because I've realized what I said to you in the beginning. What do I love about the business and what don't I like anymore? And I'm getting to the point now that I don't want to have that many employees anymore. It's just a different grind, and it takes the joy out of the beauty piece of it. So I want to be able to serve a patient population that is not just about vanity for hair. It is about them being able to feel and look like themselves so they can actually fight for their lives. And in that, there's a lot of opportunity for me to make money, but there's a way for me to grow this business and bring the beauty back into the piece of it that the medical side does not see. Because you can look and feel like yourself. You can fight for your life, and.

You'Re still coming from a place of service. I keep hearing that theme with you, which is just really. I don't even know if you realize how much you do that, which is incredible. You really do live in a world of service. Like, that's how you operate, which is what's making you. I feel why you're getting. Having so much abundance is because you. You really do operate with a servant mentality of how do I serve? Which is really, really cool.

I didn't realize that, but I'm glad that's. Maybe that's what it is. I hope so.

And then. Okay, my final question for you that I. Gosh, I'm dying to know what you're gonna say here. So if there's somebody listening that's down on their dumps right now, maybe they're in that divorce that you were going through, or maybe they. They're still struggling with growing up in a family the way that you did, Like. Like they had the mom that it was in and out of prison and the uncle doing drugs, and maybe they're stuck in their rock bottom, whatever that is, and they realize that they've got to shift out. What are three pieces of advice you would give them to start shifting out of that?

First, you have to forgive yourself first. That's the biggest thing that we all struggle with, is we want to live and stay in the past. And I always tell people it's not happening right now. Regardless of how much crap happened to me as a child, no matter the number of violations and betrayals that I received, it's not happening right now. And it's up to me to figure out a way to forgive myself for anything that I'm allowing them to do to me in this moment, because it's not happening right now. So I have to forgive myself for staying in a marriage longer than I should have and dishonoring myself by staying with the man longer than I needed to because I was afraid to be by myself. I never even knew that I was. That I was never that type of woman. And so I found myself making concessions and excuses for his behavior. And then I looked in the mirror one day and I didn't even recognize myself. And I had to forgive myself for that. And so that's part of it. And then secondly, quit caring what other people have to say or what they think about you, because at the end of the day, they do not matter. They're not going to pay your bills, they're not going to solve your problems. That's up to you to do that. So you have to quit waiting for validation or permission for you to live your life. I always say I'm not a parking ticket, I'm not a car. You know, you don't. I don't need you to validate me. So I love that. And I don't need you to. I don't need you to clap for me either. You know, some people are waiting around for applause for doing what they're supposed to do every day, which is get up and live your life like this is your life. No one has to clap for you to do that. No one has to believe in you but you. And the minute you start believing in you, your life changes. The minute you focus on you and believing in you and your own abilities, whatever they are, you will see a shift in your life. But it all starts there. It's. You have to forgive yourself. You have to forgive the other people. And the forgiveness is for you, not for Them. Yeah, you just have to forgive them so you can let it go. Because if not, it will hold on to you forever. Like, I had to forgive my ex husband for his behavior. I had to forgive myself in that process, but I also had to remember who I was.

Yeah, this is great.

And I remember I remembered who I was. And when I remembered who I was, it was gloves off, game on.

Wow. So forgive yourself. Quit worrying about what others think. And then what else is there? A third.

And quit waiting for someone else to believe in you more than you believe in yourself.

Good one. That's a good one.

Yeah. Yeah. They're not going to support you. Oh, no one supports me or nobody believes in me. I don't have a mentor. You don't need a mentor. You have Google. You don't need a mentor. You don't know adult who wants to actually get out here and accomplish anything in their lives. The mentorship comes, the partnership comes, the relationship comes, the alliances come when you make some yourself, someone that other people want to be around. But no one's going to sit here and give you a blueprint for your life for you not to go and do it anyway. That's the reason I charge people. Yeah. The reason I charge people for coaching. Because every single thing that I do right now, I've been doing since I was a child. I've been telling people how to straighten out their lives since I was a kid. Since I was a kid, I would sit down with people and say, okay, well, if you just do this or you do that, I have a girl that I was talking to. We were friends from the time we were were born. Both of our mothers got pregnant at 15 and were best friends. We were friends our entire lives. She couldn't figure out how to go to college because she had $144 car payment on a Hyundai XL. So I showed her how to get financial aid, how to get student loan, how to pay all of her bills for the entire year so she wouldn't have to work the first year. She now has a PhD. I coached her to get. She has more education than I do now. And every single thing, I told her how to do it. So, I mean, you can show a person if you have a learning disability, you can learn just about anything. And even if you have a disability, guess what? Your other senses will kick in. Yeah. So you can teach people how to do anything. So quit waiting for people to mentor you and show you everything. If you start doing the work, the help will come. This is it always does.

So so good, Maya. So good. Where can people find you? Where do you want them going? Share your website. Where are you most popular on social? Where are you most spending your time? Where can people find you?

Oh gosh, where can they find me? If they want to get a good dose of kick butt in the morning, then go to my Instagram and it's M A J A S O Y. Or go to myasly.com and that's where you'll find me. My beauty brands are Walk In Weaves and Pretty Hair. Now is the website and that is my hair extension company. We do amazing numbers. We help other people grow and develop their own personal brands. So I not only sell hair, so that was another thing I was able to monetize. I go to television. Not only do I sell my own brand, but I franchise the brand so other people can have it, but I teach other people how to grow their own hair brands.

Amazing. And if you are anyone that's like what do I do? How do I find opportunity? What's next? Study Maya, because you are the queen of turning just anything into opportunity. You've done such a phenomenal job that you really. I know you said it's funny when people say that to you, but it is true. You turn everything you touch into gold. Totally worth following. Thank you so much, Maya. Thank you.

Thank you for having me. It was a joy. I really appreciate it. Thank you so much.

Thanks for leveling up with us today. Please share this episode if you found it helpful so others can join in. And don't forget to hit that subscribe so you don't miss out on future shows. And if you would leave me a five star review. I appreciate those so much. I read all of them and it's how I know that I'm giving you information that you find valuable. And come interact with me over on Instagram @nataliejofit. I read all the direct messages and comments over there. Make it a great day. Creating everything from nothing.