062: Baring It All with Susan Hyatt

Hi, I'm Natalie Jill, fat loss expert turned high performance coach. When odds are stacked against us, how do we shift and create everything from nothing? How do we level up when we aren't feeling it yet or we've had a big setback? On this podcast, I'll be talking to some of the most inspiring and courageous men and women on this planet who at their worst learned how to achieve success greater than they ever dreamed possible. Leveling up and creating everything from nothing. Once an overweight, unmotivated realtor, Susan Hyatt described herself as a couch potato. Now, you would not know that today because she is a master certified life and business coach now who specializes in helping women get more of whatever they want, whether it's more money, more media, more, more recognition, more pleasure, more passion, or more time to pursue meaningful goals. She's now the author of two books, create your own luck and Bear. Her work has been featured in places like the O, Oprah Magazine, Women's World, Cosmopolitan, Huffington Post, and more. She's the creator of the Bear process, a trademark system for upgrading your mental and physical health, building more energy, confidence and creating life that you want. Join in today and learn exactly how Susan Hyatt leveled up going from couch potato to bestselling author and created everything from nothing. Today on leveling Up, I've got Susan Hyatt, author and life coach. And I'm excited to talk to you today because she's got her new book out Bear, which I just started getting a sneak peek at and it's amazing. So thanks for being here. I cannot wait to talk with you and introduce you to my audience today.

Oh my gosh. Thank you so much. I'm so stoked to be here. I'm such a fan and I can't.

Wait to dive in. Thank you. So. Okay, so I want to I going to jump right in because first of all, the COVID of your new book, Bear is telling us a lot about what we think it might be about, but that's not necessarily what's in it. So I want to know. I have so many questions for you, but for starters, tell us who you were before this book even came to fruition. Like who were you before? Because looking at what your expertise is now and knowing your story from before, they're not the same. So take us back. Who were you before?

So before I became a coach, so I'm about to celebrate my 12th year anniversary as a life coach, I was a burnt out residential real estate agent who was swinging through McDonald's and Taco Bell three times a day. No exaggeration. I was a junk food junkie, couch potato, workaholic with two very small children just trying to get through the day and unhealthy in every sense of the words. I was not doing the work that I wanted to do in the world. I felt unhappy in my physical body. I was 40 pounds over my natural weight. And I had a real breaking point when I one day was driving my big Toyota Sequoia with my real estate signs rattling in the back, and my kids were in their car seat strapped in, and I was on my cell phone arguing with another realtor about an inspection report. And I looked in the rear view mirror and I looked at my little kids faces with their sippy cups and like big eyes, like looking at me. And I thought like, this is not how I want these kids to remember their mom, like racing through town stressed.

Oh my God, you just described like half of my life and everybody listening probably.

I know, I know. I was for sure that mom that would hit the snooze button six, seven times. And then I was racing around the house trying to get everybody out of the house on time. And you know, I would go to pack their lunches and we wouldn't have anything but like dried up mini carrots.

And you know, got your Cheerio sandwich today, right?

I was a hot mess. And. And then I started reading and devouring cells.

Okay, so wait before you jump there, because I'm like, this is so. I. I'm totally pict. This is so many women. And this was definitely me at one point. Like, did you know I knew you knew you were chaos and you knew that it was not. It was like this mess. Right? But did you know you were being unhealthy? Like, did you think of that as like, I'm hurting my health right now?

I knew that fast food was not healthy in terms of being a workaholic and my daily practices. No, I was completely unconscious to how I was, how it all worked together and how my mindset was contributing to all of it. I didn't know that.

I know that's what a lot of people where they are right now, they don't even know. They're so stuck in the doing. Like, I have this just this to do list, this to do list, which by the way, never goes away ever. Right? Ever. So they just keep attracting more of that chaos. Okay, so you see that there's a problem. What happened that you're like, okay, I need to shift and get personal development help. I need to Step into something else. Like where do you remember, like that moment or what happened?

I remember the moment like it was yesterday because my Southern mama was visiting for Easter. And before she came to visit, she made me promise that I would not work during her visit. And I said, sure, okay. And I made this promise to her and I was committed to this promise. And so I let all of the clients that I was currently working with know that I was going to be taking a holiday and my mom was visiting, yada yada, yada. Well, I forgot about these out of town clients that they lived out of town. I didn't expect them to be in town over the Easter holiday. I had shown them a million and one houses and then they just popped up into town because they had a holiday because of Easter. And they sent me a voicemail and basically said, hey, we want to put an offer in on, you know, whatever. 1, 2, 3, Happy Street. We had an Easter holiday vacation and just thought we'd come into town and buy this house. Now I. It was the biggest real estate transaction of my career.

I can imagine. Like, I'm already jumping out of my seat because that's an addiction of like, oh, gotta do it.

I know I gotta do it. And, and, and I did. I was really conflicted and mad about it, but I went and I sold that house on Easter Sunday. And when I came home, I was happy that I wrote the offer. I was excited about the money, but I felt, I knew I had disappointed my family. And my mom in the kitchen, she was like, who are you? This is not my daughter. Like, you're not happy. All you do is work. And I remember I broke down into tears and she said, why don't I stay with the kids for a couple of days and you go do something for you, like, you've lost yourself. You just need to go have fun. And I remember this is the moment I knew there was a problem. Here's my mother offering to keep my kids for a couple of days. And the only thing that I could think of that I would do was get caught up on laundry or go grocery shopping by myself.

And, you know, I feel like a lot of women listening could completely relate to this. So I get it.

Yeah. I mean, it was like, oh, I could go to Target all alone or I could get everything caught up around here.

I could take shower before I go to Target alone.

Right? I could take a shower. And so I was just like, something has got to change because this is bananas. And that honestly, I credit that moment for the real Turning point in my life when I remember I went to Barnes and Noble and I was looking for a book like that old classic, what Color is your parachute?

Remember that book? I had that book to figure out my job. I remember. So, yeah, right, right.

I was like, I need, I need like something like that. And what I ended up buying was Dr. Martha Beck's finding youg Own North Star, which I still consider one of the best self help books ever written. And I started actually doing the exercises in the book and my life started to get better.

Wow.

And I became obsessed with her and saw that she trained people to do what she did. And I'll never forget, I told my husband, I said, I think I'm going to go to Arizona and train to be a life coach. And he looked at, he was like, what are you saying? What is a life? Because 12 years ago in southern Indiana, no one knew what a life coach was.

Nor were you acting like a life coach with the chaos you had. So what he had seen before.

No, no. Well, I will say he was noticing, everyone was noticing changes. And I couldn't stop talking about this book. You know, I was very much like, well, Martha Beck says. And I was like an evangelist for this book and for my thoughtwork. I learned. I mean, I felt like I had won the lottery when I learned, like, wait, what I'm thinking might not be true if it's causing me pain and I can change my mindset. What?

Yeah. That's incredible. I love that she resonated with you because I feel like, you know, we find what we're, what we're thinking about. So when you're thinking about chaos all the time, we just find more chaos. But when you stop, you took some time to actually learn whether it's Martha Beck or whoever, and you started applying. It's like, then you start finding more of that. And it's amazing how that is so contagious.

Absolutely. And you know, I started following so Eckhart, Tolle and Byron, Katie. You know, it was this domino effect of positivity that was happening. I still had a long way to go, don't get me wrong. But I remember when I talked to a member of her team about the training, I just knew. I just knew in my bones I had to go. And my husband was like, I don't understand even what coaching is and how you think that's going to replace your real estate income. And I was like, I don't know.

But I'm going to.

And that changed the trajectory of my.

Entire life I hope everyone just heard that because this is a theme with guests that I have, that people get clear on their purpose and their vision and what they want to create, and they don't know how, and it doesn't matter. They just put that energy behind it and it happens.

Right? I mean, I honestly had no idea. I remember I went to the training, and the training back then was five days in person. We were all crammed into a hotel suite with Martha Beck, and I sat on the edge of my chair. I didn't even take bathroom breaks. I was so consumed and enthralled with it. And on the plane ride home, I wrote my business plan on the back of a Delta net.

I love it.

And I came home and I was like, this is on. And my husband was like, oh, dear God. I mean, everybody around me was like, she's lost it. Oh, my God. And within 90 days, I closed out my real estate practice and was full time coaching.

It's incredible. I want everyone to really grasp this because it's. Once you're onto the right thing for the right reasons, it's like nothing will get in your way. I mean, it really won't. And I think so many times we get so stuck on the how, like, how's it going to happen? How's it going to happen? And that we don't even, like, let ourselves dream and go for that passion. But I love this, and this is what makes you the perfect life coach, is you literally lived this. You want. You watched your life turn around. You were. You had a front row seat to your life turning around, and now you're coaching and teaching others how to do that.

Absolutely. And for me, I have such a fire in the belly about it because I'm like, listen, I was that woman crying under her desk in her office. I was that woman who was like, please give me a sign. I was that woman who was eating and shopping and doing all the things to cope with negative emotion instead of dealing with it. And so I honestly feel like if. If I can do it, any woman can do it.

You guys can't see her on video right now. I'm looking at her and she doesn't look like the couch potato that eats fast food anymore. So I'm imagining somewhere along the line in the shift, you got healthy and you started losing the weight. What. How. What happened there? How did that happen?

So I was already a coach, and I really felt like food and body was the final frontier for me. Ha ha ha. I mean, there's. I'm always Learning and growing. But at the time, I was like, if I can solve that, I'm good. And I hired Brooke Castillo as a weight loss coach for myself. And I remember I was such a brat about it. I was like, you can't make me exercise. And, oh, she had a field day with me. But I lost between 35, 40 pounds. And I remember thinking, if me, a professional couch potato, junk food junkie, can turn this around, any woman can turn it around. And I started adopting weight loss coaching into my repertoire as a coach. And so over the years, going from a woman who refused to move her body to a woman who, you know, runs and spins and lifts weights. And I do it not so that my body will look a certain way, but because of how I feel when I do it. For mental health, for processing emotion. And the byproduct of that is, yes, I look differently than I did. But I tell you what, it is a miracle that I am who I am today. And it happened because of a mindset shift.

Yeah, I think mindset shift is everything. I mean, it really is everything so cool about it. Is it? It always. They fuel each other. So, like, so many times, especially because I deal with fat loss all the time, right? Women come to me, they're overweight, they're depressed, and they're so focused on, I just need to lose the weight. What's the meal plan, what's the workout? And what is so amazing is when they get to see how that mindset shift can empower them and change them. Then their whole life starts improving. Like, everything starts leveling up. So they really go together.

They absolutely go together. And I tell my entrepreneur clients all the time, I'm like, listen, we're going to talk about food and body because they are so intertwined. If you want to uplevel, if you want to break through six figures, seven figures, and you're not moving your body. That's why, like, we've got to get you. We've got to get you into the mindset of. I'm a woman who takes exceptional care of herself for many reasons, but a practical reason is, you're going to make more money, by the way.

And I don't. Susan, I'm wondering, because I know for me, when I'm moving, I get my best ideas. I'm the most creative. Does that happen?

Oh, hands down, the mind, body, connection. So for me, I was never someone. Like, when I read Eat, Pray, Love by Elizabeth Gilbert, I wanted to meditate and have that blue light experience that she described so vividly.

In that book.

And I would sit, I got a special pillow, and I would stare at a candle flame. And I'm like, I can't do it. But what's interesting is that movement is.

A form of meditation.

And so active moving meditation, running is where I really feel like I get all my downloads. Like, every new idea. Yes. Every breakthrough. And so if I get a client who wants to meditate and, like, really can't, I'm like, let's try moving meditation, because it doesn't have to look like that.

Thanks for saying that, because I am certainly not a meditation expert at all. But I feel that the whole idea is when you can get yourself fully present and out of your own head of, like, worry. That's when it's amazing. And I agree, like, moving my body, like, all. Anything like that will help do that. So it doesn't have to look like, oh, and sitting there and quiet. Right, right.

I mean, you're not doing it wrong. And honestly, women who are in business and women who are running their households, Movement, Drop the transaction. Like body. I will move you. If you look a certain way and start thinking of it as, this is gonna. This is practical. This is gonna help me have the energy to do what I need to do for these kids in this business. And this is also gonna give me my best ideas. And I'm telling you, if you're feeling stuck in your life, it's probably because you're not moving.

Okay? So someone's listening right now, and they're like, okay, I hear you. I am the chaos. I am looking back at my kids going, oh, my gosh, I'm multitasking, and this isn't good. I am eating the fast food, whatever, but they're still stuck in the doing and the how. They haven't had that breakthrough that you had yet. Like, help me with them. Like, what do we tell them? What's first?

I think the first thing to do, and it's really the first step of the bear process, is do what I call an environmental detox or assess your environmental diet, meaning you're going to be an investigative reporter for about a week in your life, and you're going to pay attention to what is coming at you through all of your senses other than just your food. So what are you watching? What are you listening to? What are you paying attention to on social media? What kinds of conversations are you entertaining in your life? And pay attention to, like, are you on default? Or are you curating your environment and what's coming at you through all your senses in a way that's supportive and uplifting. Honest to God, most women are just tolerating such nonsense at the office and in their families and in the community that when they start to take their power back and they start to say, you know what, kids? You're not choosing the music on the ride home from school because I don't like it. And guess what? I'm not going to have that violent TV show on right before bedtime. And also, I'm going to speak up at the staff meeting. Those things start to have an impact on your energy.

Are you in my head right now like that? I'm going to my daughter. She's off the music. I'm just kidding.

Oh, my God. Oh, my God. I'm telling you what, Like, I used to let my kids. And I know all you moms out there are listening and saying, well, kidz Bop isn't so bad, or whatever. Middle school rap, whatever they're listening to, listen. You have to protect your energy. And you're feeling depleted for many reasons. Probably. This is an easy way to get some of your energy back. And once you start to get some of your energy back, then you can start to think and make changes. I love that.

Okay, so step one, you would say, like, go, and we're going to. I like that you call it, like, be a reporter of your life. Like, what. What's coming in? So instead of just going into vision of what do you want to create, you're saying, like, what. What are you taking in right now? Like, you're taking an inventory. Kind of like what we would do, I guess, with fat loss, too. You'd say, like, get on the scale. Like, where are we starting? Right. So you're taking it.

Right.

I love that. And then what would you tell them next? And this is great because this is what you have outlined in your book. I'm assuming this is what.

Okay, yeah, absolutely. Yep. And so then the next step would be pleasure. So, okay, you've taken an assessment of all the things coming at you. The person in the cubicle next to you that's always talking about a diet and you know, your crazy boss who's always, you know, harassing you or ordering you around, like, whatever it might be. Now we're moving more into pleasure. And when I start talking to a woman about diversifying her pleasure, everybody's mind goes to sex.

Mine just went there, by the way.

Right, right.

Which is good.

That's important. But physical touch and intimacy is just one kind of pleasure. There are so Many different categories of pleasure that I talk about in the book. And I give ideas, easy, free ideas on how to infuse your life with more pleasure. But here's the thing, is that not only do women not prioritize their pleasure, they think it's selfish if they do. And so we have a whole like 50% of the population putting themselves on the back burner instead of assessing, like, what do I need? Do I need intellectual stimulation? Do I need more beauty in my life movement? Yes, pleasure through food. But that's just one source. Do I need comfort? Do I need a spiritual upgrade? There are all different kinds of pleasure. And so becoming devoted to your own pleasure is another key to this process. And I promise you, moms listening. Moms are. We're the worst. We tell ourselves such nonsense. And most of us tell ourselves things like, well, the kids have to come first. Guess what? When mom gets a front burner, everybody gets a front burner. There is no downside to your kids seeing a happy, fulfilled mom.

Yeah. Interesting. I love this. Ok, tell us more about why this book came to fruition, how you came up with the title. Talk to us about that.

Yeah. So Bare is really B A R E is about getting bare, getting raw, getting to the truth in addition to loving your bare skin. And the book came to fruition. So I mentioned that I started coaching women around weight loss about 11 years ago. And throughout that, all those years, I started to notice that I could help a woman lose any amount of weight, but then her mind would go, it was never enough. And then her mind would go to, well, I have stretch marks, I still have a muffin top, I'm aging, you.

Know, their minds, why are we so hurt?

That's what we do. We do. And I mean, there's a lot of stuff I talk about in the book, as in my theories on why. I really think that women from birth are steeped in this diet culture, that our value is tied up in our appearance. And depending on what the cultural beauty norms are, it's an ever moving shell game as to what's popular at the time.

Fifteen years ago it was get a boob job and have no butt. Now it's don't get a boob job and have the big butt.

Exactly.

Whatever. It changes constantly. I mean, I remember this skinny, skinny being in. And now it's the curvy, like you can't. You're never gonna please what society is viewing.

Exactly. And you're so right. I mean, remember Kate Moss and like heroin chic, like so Skinny. And then now we have the Kardashians, Nicki Minaj, Cardi B, which I celebrate all bodies. But if we're trying to like, if we're trying to like conform and contort ourselves to fit an industry standard, we're always going to be losing.

And the women in the 80s is not what's considered attractive now. It's crazy.

I know. And aging as well. So I'm 45. And women are also taught in addition to like shrink your body as much as possible, also a young body wrinkle free is your commodity. And so I think women were just set up to base our worth on external appearances and then the competition in that. And that's why our minds are always seeking like what can I improve or, or never being satisfied with how our body is appearing. Which is why this work is so important to me. I have an 18 year old daughter and I really value how it feels to feel free in my own skin and I want to share that with other women. But it came to be through noticing in my weight loss coaching that women were never satisfied and it didn't matter how much weight they had lost, it was never enough. And so I started to really pay attention to the homework assignments I was giving that had the biggest bang for the buck, if you will. And also assignments that I could get women to do where I'm a little tricky. Like you think it's all just like you mentioned the COVID The COVID is bubblegum pink. I'm in a bubble bath, I have a glass of champagne and she's there. Oh, this is so fun. And I'm there. I'm nakey in the tub. And. But when you get in and start doing it, there's a lot of deep work that happens. And so you know, it's deceiving but it's impactful.

And let me, I want to share. Like I, I'm looking at Susan right now. She's not saying like get rid of your bra and let's not ever wear makeup and let's just accept and let's go gray. And maybe some people do want to do that. But I'm looking at you and I'm listening to you and what I'm hearing is that like it's okay whatever you choose to do, but it's this never ending chase of like it's not enough. That's the, that's the bigger concern. So like you, however you're deciding to age or whatever that means.

Absolutely, yeah. I mean if your listeners go to my Instagram, for example, you're going to see me in sequins. You're going to see me half naked half the time. You're going to see me in heels. You're going to. I have blonde hair. Like, I am not. It's whatever you want to do. I'm A fan of RuPaul, who says, My maker created it. Now I'm going to decorate it like you. You adorn yourself however you feel comfortable. So this isn't about that you need to be naked or you need to go gray or there's shame in wearing makeup or even cosmetic surgery. But it's making sure that you're making those choices and adorning yourself in a way that feels empowering and free for you.

Yes. Thank you for saying that. Yeah. Because I think there is a disconnect with people think it's an extreme, like, oh, I have to just like. I've never liked the term age gracefully because to me, it doesn't there. It's just left to be interpreted all kinds of ways. To me, I like saying age in reverse because just get rid of the whole what we assume is true about aging, and let's just age how you want to age. Like, if you want to.

I love dress young.

You know, my daughter makes fun of me sometimes. She says, mom, dress like the other moms. I'm like, why I'm gonna dress like. I dress like my kids.

My kids used to say stuff like that, too, and especially when they were in middle school.

My daughter's 11, so there you have it. There you go.

I mean, it's like they don't want any attention directed in any which way. I remember my son asking me if I could not show up at the school in my room.

My daughter asked me that every day. Mom, can you pick me up? Not in workout clothes. Nope.

I know.

I'm like, sorry.

And now it's funny that now they're proud of it. You know, they're 18 and 20 now, so now they're like, you know, this is my mom more proud of it. The middle school years are.

Yeah. She wants me in a moo moo with Birkenstocks, and that's fine. Well, I love it. So, okay, where can people get your book? Tell us, and where are they gonna find more? And then I have a couple more quick questions for you.

Sure. So there's a website for the book. It's called letsgetbair.com and there's all the information about the book, tour the book. There's a podcast that they can listen to and then if you want to follow me on Instagram or Facebook, it's susanpiott.

Okay. And then I have two more questions for you. One is if like the best part about your book, if like the reason people have to go get it, what are you most proud of in that book?

Okay, so here's what I'm most proud of. That secretly the book is a process to bring a woman home to herself. But it also is. Have you heard of the term the invisible workload of women?

What does that mean?

Okay. Okay. So when my kids were little, my husband and I used to always have this tit for tat of who did more. Like I did the laundry and I cooked and like you, it's your turn to go to soccer practice and we would bicker about those kinds of things. And a couple of years ago, by.

The way, I'm just kidding.

Listen, I am in full support of women putting their partners, spouses and kids to work in the house because we're doing too much, which is part of the problem. And but this author a couple of years ago, I wish I'll send the link, maybe we could put it in the show notes. But articulated it so beautifully that even if you have the most supportive spouse, partner, home situation where the division of labor is even Steven equal women have an additional part time job called the invisible workload of women, which is we do a lot of the emotional heavy lifting for the family, the community, the office. We're the keeper of all the things. Like we know when the dog needs to be vaccinated and which sippy cup to give the kids so they don't have a fit and all those things that can't really be accounted for. But it's this additional workload that no one gets credit for. And I feel that most women don't have the energy to take care of themselves to do something like the bear process because they're not even aware that they're participating in this additional part time job. And so I think what I'm most proud of is I think this process exposes that and helps a woman reclaim her time and power.

Okay. It's priority of mine right now to finish that book this week then because I need to see this. This is awesome. And then my final question for you is something I ask everybody. I know you touched a little bit on this, but I want to direct it more specifically to if somebody's listening to this right now and they're their own personal rock bottom. So maybe if you were going to go back and Talk to yourself. When you were in that car and you're scattered like I've gained weight, I'm eating unhealthy, I'm not being a good mom.

Right now.

They're in their own personal rock bottom, whatever that means to them. If you were to give them a few tips that they can start applying right now to shift out of it, what would you tell them?

Number one, pay attention and eavesdrop on yourself to what you're telling yourself. And anything that you're telling yourself that creates pain is a lie. It's somehow a lie. And you have to clap back to that inner mean girl. So you have to cultivate the self skills to say something that serves you. And maybe it's something as simple as I'm not sure what I'm going to do, but I'm going to figure it out really good. That's number one. So mindset is the key. And the number two thing I want to encourage them to do is set their alarm for to get up just five minutes earlier. Five minutes. Five minutes earlier before those kids feet hit the floor can change your life.

As long as you don't hit snooze in those five minutes.

No hitting snooze. Get up after that five minutes.

Awesome. Do you have a third? So watch listening to what you're saying to take an inventory I know you touched on earlier, but also just being really aware of what you're telling yourself. Get up early. What would be a third thing?

I would say the third thing is practice saying no to people. So I had a client, I had a client lose 80 pounds just by saying no.

I said, guess what was she saying no to?

She was saying no to like all the requests coming her way that she didn't want to do. Like women typically are saying yes to a bunch of nonsense. We're volunteering and doing all these things we don't want to be doing to the expense of our health. So I want to challenge everybody to do the no diet and start saying no when you mean no.

I love it. This has been awesome. Susan. Go get her book, everyone.

You can find it everywhere.

Bear. It's incredible. You can't miss it. It's. You'll see the pink and the bubbles and her bareness. Thank you for being here, Susan. And where are you most active on social media?

I'm most active now on Instagram. So awesome. Yeah.

You follow her on Instagram. Thank you so much, Susan.

Thank you.

Thanks for leveling up with us today. Please share this episode if you found it helpful so others can join in. And don't forget to hit that subscribe so you don't miss out on future shows. And if you would leave me a five star review. I appreciate those so much. I read all of them and it's how I know that I'm giving you information that you find valuable. And come interact with me over on Instagram @nataliejofit. I read all the direct messages and comments over there. Make it a great day. Creating everything from nothing.