Below the Belt with Sexologist and Zenzsual Co-founder Dr. Sofia

This midlife conversation is going to be a good one. We are going below the belt today. We're talking all things that we've been keeping private with Dr. Sophia Found, Co founder of Zensual. She is quite the personality. She has a wealth of knowledge. She's incredible. I've learned so much from her. I'm obsessed with her whole product line. I'm obsessed with her in general and her partner and what they're doing on social media, what they're doing for women's health, especially. Especially us women in midlife. I have so many questions for her today, and there are things that we're not typically talking about publicly, and we've got to go there. We're going to go below the belt today. So, Dr. Sophia, thank you so much for being here today.

Thank you, Natalie. I'm so thrilled to be here with you talking about midlife.

Yeah. And below the belt. Okay, so let's back up a minute. Because you were an ob GYN or you are an obgyn, what made you get so interested in these specific topics, moving away from just, you know, delivering babies and just regular pap smears? Like, what got you interested in all this?

Well, when I was in my country in Venezuela, I mean, I had like more than 15, 20 years of practice doing that. But during that time, I realized that women's art so mis on misunderstood about how they work, like in. In a integral or balanced way, how the body work, how the body is connected with the mind, and how so many stuff that we go through life, we. We are like a changing humans, different from men. Women go through different changes over their life. And every time we have to adapt to those changes and the lack of knowledge of those changes take women to do stuff that may be, like, not adequate and can have bad consequence in their body and in their functions. And so there is so much that a woman could learn about the body that when they do and they do the right stuff in their body and they know, they change the whole panorama. And during that time, I realized that a lot of that lack of knowledge, knowledge goes around the sexual health, the intimate health. So I started, like, doing stuff in my country around social media, around TV shows. And the response of the public was so amazing. Like, giving me thanks for, like, informing about that stuff that, that I. I mean, I would change life. Not even touching or doing surgery, just talking about what no one talks. Yeah.

You know, so maybe it's the. It's. Maybe it's your culture helping you along or something, but you have been so eye opening for me because I watch you talk about these topics that are almost considered taboo and private and most people kind of gasp at. And I think, but, gosh, you have such good information and this is so helpful and I wish we had more of you and, you know, full transparency. When I asked her to be on my show, she said, you know, I can speak English, but I've got all my stuff is in Spanish. Is that okay? And I said yes, because I need you. We need to get you out there. I need more people to hear your messaging. We will bear with the Spanish on your website because I don't, I don't care because you've got such good information. So I'm going to, I'm going to go right into some questions because you're the best one to ask these two. And I'm just like, warning, if you've got like kids in the car or something, you may, I mean, I don't know how you feel about it, but you might want to wait to listen to this episode because we're talking below the belt. Talking below the belt. So this is an adult conversation here. So just that was your, that was your little warning. Okay, so we're going to talk first about pain during intercourse that seems to start after having a baby and seems to get worse in menopause. What the heck is happening? Why is that happening to us? It feels like a cruel joke.

I mean, this topic is very important for us women to understand about it because I think pain during intercourse is the number one killer of the sexual drive. A woman that endure and that over the time. Pain in several times is a woman that is not going to wish to have sex with her partner is a woman who is not going to like desire or love to get intimate because of the pain. So pain Star, as you said, very accurate. Sometimes during, after we deliver a baby and the pain in that period of time in a woman is naturally induced because of the hormonal change that a woman go through after the woman have a baby, even though they have it through vaginal delivery or C section, no matter what, in that time, the woman's body is prepared to feed the baby, to take care of the baby. So all the hormones that produce in our brain and in our ovaries are like blocking that part of desire. And vaginal lubrication that is the key of the pain in that time of our life. So what happening is that breastfeeding, even though you do not do breastfeeding in that time, but the preparation of breastfeeding Induce that some production in your brain or hormone that tells your vagina not to lubricate adequately. If the woman on top of that had a vaginal delivery and had, let's say, a tear of the vagina or episiotomy of the vagina, on top of that, you get a tissue that is not well prepared to expand and receive that penis and will have the natural lubrication that usually has to be there in order not to have pain. And while the pain comes there. So once the woman experience pain, once they start to. If they do not know these, they start to imagine. Because we are very creative in our brains and we start to say to ourselves, oh, what's happening to me? Oh, I don't love my husband. Or oh, maybe what happened? I mean, if we are not aware of those changes and we do not talk to our doctors about it or we are not told about it in the aftercare visit to the clinic, we start to imagine stuff and we start to put away in our brains that wanting of having sex. And it's very stupid, and I'm sorry to say the word, because it's the easiest pain, is the easiest pain. Pain to alleviate. With the silly stuff that we just have, like correct lubrication in our vagina, we can alleviate that pain or maybe start with different techniques of introducing the penis into the vagina. This is something that is not written, but I have been observing how the vagina is in shape and in direction and with a simple inclination of the penis, introducing in the vagina, the pain is alleviated. I can show it to you. I don't know.

Yeah, let's do the models. If you're watching the video, if you're not watching the videos, you're missing out here because she's got some. She's got some props.

Yeah, the vagina has the vagina. I say to my patients and to my. The people following me is like slider. You know that in the top, in the entrance, when. When this is the entrance. Okay. The inside the vagina is like a little bump. And after it goes, when the woman is belly up to ceiling, I mean, he's laying down back in the. In the bed. The vagina has an inclination like a slide to the back of our body. Okay. So when you. I'm going to open the model so you can see it.

That's a big vagina model I've never seen.

Yeah. So the vagina has this inclination like this. It goes down. Okay. This part of here, I mean, the entrance. For those who are not Looking at the video, the entrance of the vagina has like a group of muscles there in that part that is called the perineum. It's part of the pelvic floor muscles that are like behind the skin you see in the vulva. So that part is usually, even though you had had a delivery, is a very tough and a very firm part. If the woman has no lubrication and the penis intend to go into the vagina straight ahead, it's going to bump with that part of the perineum and it's swelling, it's tender because of the liver. It's going to be painful. So if you put a little bit of a good lubricant in the penis and you introduce it with a little bit of inclination, like if you can't.

See, she's pointing down, like she's got an angle down. Yeah.

I mean, for those who are listening, if you take like the penis through the base and, and incline it to the back of your body a little bit, it will slide on to the direction of the vagina. And the introduction is going to be much easier, of course, not painful at all. So. Okay, that's a good technique that everyone.

That is super helpful. What do we look for in a lubricant? Because like, you, you designed your own. Because I know you were frustrated with what's out there. And she's got a whole product line, by the way, essential, which when. By the way, when she sent me her box. She sent me her box of stuff and I'm thinking I'm getting like supplements and maybe a little lubricant. No, there was a box of toys. My husband got like, pret. Excited. He was like, what is happening here? Oh, it's a gift for me. I see. There's like, there's all kinds of stuff in there. Anyways, you got to check out their stuff because they've got the best stuff. But anyway, they have fun stuff too. So. Okay, so what do you look for in a lubricant? Like, how do they know? Like, do they need yours? Can they buy a different. Like, what do they need?

Okay, I love that question because, I mean, you have no idea how many lubricants I have tried during my life. Because, you know, and then so much side effect that I have experienced myself and my patients through that journey of, I mean, looking. The perfect lubricant. The perfect lubricant is something that has to be water based. And it has to be water based because, you know, when you have a lubricant that is not water based. They are tend to be oily and the oil gets stuck into the vagina. The vagina ply. How do you say pliers? Like the vagina is like. Like this instrument that you open and shrink the vagina is. Shrink it. And when the penis is inside it expands, you know. But when the penis is not inside it shrink again. And those folds that are inside the vagina, they tend to accumulate the oily lubricants and they do not absorb easily. So it's like more easy to get infections when you use oil based lubricants. So water based, without glycerin, without parabens, dirt and phenoxy ethanol that are toxic, toxic to our bodies. And they shouldn't have silicone.

Okay.

I know that people love Ceylon because it tends to long last in the. In the intercourse. But silicone is also something that is not easily absorbed by the vagina.

Good to know.

The other important stuff that you have to look for is they do not have a sense or flavor because those additive could cause a lot of side effects like redness, swelling. And it can be like an allergic reaction reaction in your body easily. The other stuff that is essential in a good lubricant, it has to have something that work for your body after you finish the intercourse. Like yellow veronic acid. Lubricant that has hyaluronic acid is more than a lubricant. It's a moisturizer for your body. And as you moisturize your skin, your body, you should moisturize every day your vulva and your vagina. Because you're given like the nursery or nutrients that the vagina needs to be spongy. That tissue has to be like a spongy.

Okay, while we're talking about that, what happens down there? What happens to vaginas as we age? Why do they get. Why does it change what is happening?

Okay, that's great. Because it's everything related to what happened in. During the. After we have a baby is something similar that happen when we go through our menopause or perimenopause changes. During the age, our ovaries start to diminish the amount of hormone they produce. Our body and our vagina and vulva depends a lot to grow. In order to grow or be rejuvenate, they need estrogens. When estrogen start to diminish, the vagina start to lower the thickness. Normally the vagina is like a multi layered tissue. Imagine a cake of multi layers. Okay. And that tissue of multi layers is Easily to have water and retain water inside. Like this sponge you are seeing here. When we age in time, the vagina start to lose those layers like the cake. Reducing layers and it reduce the capability of retaining water. So when you give water to your vagina through those, a spectacular moisturizer in gels like the. The one in sensual, you start to. To give what it had before the hormone went out. You give a little bit of water, they start to. To go thickness and to retain more water. I'm gonna show it to you. I don't know if you could. Everyone could see it. But it's like a sponge that you have in your, in your dishwasher. I mean if the sponge is with water is going to be thick. Is the sponge is without water, it's going to be thin. But that sponge, when you put water every day, the sponge will grow and will like have that reserve of water inside.

I love that analogy. Yeah.

When the vagina is moisturized every day, because this is something you cannot do just once. If you do it every day, you're going to keep it like thick with water inside. And when you are going to prepare for intercourse, she's going to be ready. I said she's going to be ready because the vagina is part of us. She's going to be ready to lubricate that in a. In a good way.

You know, makes sense.

So that's why you have to look for something, a lubricant that is more than a lubricant. A lubricant that moisturize your tissue from, you know, from the inside. So that those characteristics are all of them in sensual lubricants, we have two lubricants, one long lasting, that have a lot of stuff inside, more than yellowuronic acid, that are very good for your body, that is intended to use during the intercourse and the moisturizing one that is intended to use in those women in middle age menopause that need to hydrate every day. The external part and the internal part too.

Okay, got it. No, so, and I'm going to. By the way, if you want to jump ahead, anyone, and you're like, I need to see these products. It's essential. Z E N Z S U A L the name of the company. Okay, more questions here. What is going on with odor? That's another topic that comes up. And you mentioned make sure you're using these without fragrances. But I think the reason so many women are using douches or fragrances is they. I don't like the smell. So what's happening there? What's changing during menopause years, okay, during the whole.

After a woman got her first period and in. Even during menopause, her vulva and her vagina has a smell that is very particular to that area. Is not as is not a smell of flower or strawberry or lavender. No, that part cannot smell like the floor or like the bathroom or like the spray we used to like inhase our homes. No, that part has to smell like, like it should be like a vagina. It's a little bit of acid, you know, smell. And when we do exercise, could smell a little bit like an armpit without deodorant. Yeah, because, you know, no one knows, but I mean, a few knows that in the vagina. Not in the vagina, but in the folds between the legs and the vulva, major lips, there are glands that only are on your armpits and that and that part. So the smell is like similar. So that's why sometimes when you put your like your sport clothes and you do not change it and you keep the whole day with the, with the pants, you know, that part start to melt like a little bit like an armpit. So that's not normal. You should clean it. But it could happen. Okay, what I'm. What I want to get to. The smell is not supposed to be like roses. Okay? So those stuff that women do, douches spraying stuff that has smell, cleaning the area with a soap that has a lot of foam and detergents. In order to get rid of that smell. They are doing the worst to the, to the area because they are taking out two things, the fat and the hydratation that naturally occurs in our skin in the outside part. And when they clean inside, they clean and wash away all our good bacteria. We have something called their microbiota inside the vagina and also in our vulva skin. Vulva is the outside part, vagina is the inside part. Okay. We only have to clean the vulva external part. We cannot clean inside.

Wow.

Inside. I always said that part is self care. It's like the oven autocomplete.

Leave that alone. Leave that part alone.

Leave that part alone. So that desperate intent to add a different smell in our genitalia is going to cause the contrary. You're going to wash out all that bacteria that protect us from the bad ones. And you're going to be more propense to have infections that are going to like really give you a bad odor. So please clean your genitalia with something smooth that has no Detergent. That's very, very important. There is a word that is used in cosmetic to identify a product that has no deterg that is called thin, that S Y N D E T without detergent products. Okay. So if you clean that part of your bulba with something without detergent that has hyaluronic acid and that has other stuff like the cleanser incentile that has cranberry and has also a part of of chamomile that it. It. It help you to, to get like a smooth shaving or when you, you know, when you have like a little bit of swelling. Chamomile is very good to, to improve that swelling. I mean you are doing something good for your skin. So wash just one or twice a day, no more than that, because over cleaning is going to do they, they hydrate your skin. Okay. And after you clean, you have to get a moisturizing. As I told you before, you have to moisturize because after we got menopause, everything that I have telling you the skin get like for the aging process and because of the men, the hormones, the skin tend to like reducing thickness. Like the superficial layer that are dead cells tend to keep there more time. And, and it's something that if you wash a lot, you're going to like do more damage than benefit to that skin.

So makes sense.

Okay, that's is what the best, the best advice I can I can give you to. To have that part like clean. Please do not over clean and do not use something that change your natural odor.

Okay, that makes sense. Okay, so we're clear. We don't clean inside, you clean outside. What odor is normal, what's not and what's sticking out. For me, what's really standing out is like we wash our faces, we wash our body, we moisturize, but we are not doing that there. So like why. So that makes sense.

You know why? That's why we tend to have like more wrinkles over the time in that part that you have it in your face and something that is very, very important. That part tends to darken with the ages. I mean with ages because it's dehydrate. You know, when you have a skin that is dehydrate, the skin will turn like darker and you start to see how the folds between the legs and the vulva start to darken more. And I mean it looks like aging and you have a genitalia that is not a core.

Keep it youthful and plump. Wash it correctly, moisturize correctly. We got it. Okay, so let's talk about libido. Why is that changing? But you talked about pain a little bit, but what else is going on that's making that change?

Okay, libido change over the time because two factors, one like organic factors, hormones again, I mean, we start to have less quantity of estrogen and testosterone. That is the hormone that like in we were in the woman's like post the libido. So once we start to go through that role of menopause, perimenopause, testosterone start lower down and you experience a lot of, you know, diminish in the sexual drive. And the other part of lowering libido is our brains. We're not conditioned to think about sex and erotism and sensuality as we should be. I always tell people about food, the analogy with food, because I mean, if you do not think eating and if you do not try stuff, you're never gonna want stuff when you eat. It's similar to sexual drive. If you do not train your brain to think about it, to enjoy it. And if you have something like a misconception in your brain that sex, sex is not good, if you do it only for pleasure or sex, you have to do and you have to have, you have to, you know, be what your partner want to be and not for yourself and pleasure is not permitted. A lot of stuff that you can have in your mind because you know of what you are, your family, your heritage and stuff. If all those mixtures in your brain, all those conceptions can take you to forget about sex and your brain like hide it out in a very dark place. And I mean, if you do not know that pleasure is there and if you do not have good experience before is something that is going to be like hard to work with. So sexual desire in menopause is very low because one hormone goes down. Two, because our misconception that menopause is like the aging menopause is the dad of sexuality. And all the stuff that we read that we used to hear from our grand grandmothers and stuff. And I mean, we believe it and we start to like die in that, in that part. And we think that we have no more to do. And the reality is that is like a new world. I mean, because you're not gonna get pregnant. I mean, it's something good that if you think about it.

Yeah, that's true. It's totally true.

Yeah, you can be like free of expressing yourself. I mean, you are like, if you, if you work in yourself, in your self esteem and you have a good communication with Your partner, you, you, you can dare to ask what you really want, you know, without like being shy and stuff. So sexual drive is something that can recuperate at any age. And believe me when I tell you that this doesn't happen only on menopause. Did happen. This happens a lot after we deliver a baby. Sometimes when girls take pills, pills, pills to you know, anti conceptive they, they also experience a lower of desire because the anti conception pills get lower a little bit your hormones and it's like I tell them like a mini menopause, you know. And they can go through it. And if you know that you can go through it and you start to work in your mind and in your body with some lubrication, you can pump up that desire.

Okay. Okay. All right, next question. I've got for you. What is going on with pleasure orgasms and what is female ejaculation? I'm asking it because a lot of people don't know and I'm going to ask it for, for them.

Okay, which one of those you want?

Whichever you pick. What do you want to talk about?

Okay. Female ejaculation. Because I'm so mad with porn that has stick offs that stigma that every woman in order to have a good orgasm has to, you know, spit out that amount of liquid through her vagina. That is total myth. I mean female ejaculation exists, it is true, but it's not like you see it in porn. I mean ejaculation is, is event that occurs sometimes with the orgasms, sometimes without the orgasms. But of course in a small quantity, sometimes undetected because it comes from a part of our body that is really, really small. We have a little, little small glandular inside of our, you know, acai or uretra. You know the uretra is the part where the pee comes out. We have three holes in, in our vulva or two holes in the bulba and one holes in the, in the back part. That, that is the anus. The two holes in the vulva are the one for where you do pee. That's the retra and the vagina. We pee in a different hole than we have intercourse or where the baby comes out. Okay, so the female ejaculation comes from a little, small, real small glandulars that are beside the little hole where we pee. And the amount of liquid that they can hold is ridiculous. I mean it's sometimes 1 ML, 2 ML in the top 5 ML. I mean what you see in poem is like I don't know, like 10, 20 MLS. I mean, it's too much liquid that what you see in porn comes from your vegeta, from your urinary part. It's not really a female ejaculation at all. Okay, so it's a myth that that quantity is so much. It's a myth that every woman can do it. Not every woman can do it. Those that can do it, I mean, congratulations, great. But those who do not, that are most of us, don't get sad because you can enjoy sex even though you do not get an orgasm. Nevertheless, a female ejaculation. So don't focus on that. There are techniques to improve and to get closer to get it, but don't fix on it because I mean, it's not going to get, get you like, it's going to get you like through frustration instead of more pleasure. So.

Okay, another question I'm going to ask because other people will not. And I want to, I want to speak for people that don't know these things. Orgasms. People talk about G spot. They talk about clitoris. Like, what is the. Where do you. What's the difference? People don't understand. Women don't understand. What do you want them to know? Can everybody have an orgasm? Both ways help with that.

Okay, first of all, there are a lot of women that do not have an orgasm. And that frustrates me because our bodies, and if we prepare, our brains are prepared and are intended to have pleasure during intercourse. That's something that you have to get in your system in order to, to execute, to mean to, to deliver it, you know, like 20, like between 30, 40% of the woman in this war have never experienced an orgasm. And that is frustrating. But hopefully if they listen to me and to all those wonderful people who talk about pleasure and sexuality, they will get there. Okay. Orgasms is, is something that depends in my conception, in, in some of the researchers, mainly from the clitoris. Clitoris. You say clitoris. Clitoris, I love that word. I love. Clitoris is my. That is my favorite organ in the body. In the body. This organ, the clitoris is, was designed only to give us pleasure. A lot of researchers have intended to find different function to the clitoris, but there is no other function that give us pleasure. Okay, so the orgasm in a woman depends like mainly in the clitoris. And of course they can be triggered in different ways. Okay, so 80% of the women have orgasm through external stimulation of the clitoris. And that is very normal. Don't get frustrated. And of course you can learn to get orgasm from during vaginal penetration or anal penetration, but, I mean, it's easier for us. And it's not a scene to have an orgasm with external stimulation. I mean, if it's there, welcome.

It's there for a reason.

Yeah, yeah. Is there for a reason? I said to everyone, what do you think about orgasm through the vagina, through the clitoris? I mean, orgasm is an orgasm no matter how you have it. I mean, if you have it, you're blessed, right? And if you don't have it, I mean, you can train. You can be trained to have it. Okay? God gave us a few spots.

We have a few spots there to play with clitoris.

Assimilation, external orgasm. The key here is to be very good lubricated, okay? Because if you are not lubricated and you get too much stimulation through the clitoris, it's gonna be like, a little bit painful or awkward, okay? So you can assimilate clitoris in different ways. I mean, you have to find the way that you like the most. You have to be in a private place to do it. If you are not, if you have never done it, I mean, I really encourage you to start doing it because it's the best way to know your body, your response. And I mean, if you cannot get a orgasm by yourself, I mean, it's very hard to get it with someone else. That responsibility is not from. The other one is your responsibility. Okay? So be in a quiet place. Start to, like, play and. And feel. How do you feel? How do you feel all your vulva? Touch not only the clitoris. That is the part that is in the top of the folds. The. The two folds, skin folds that you have in the middle. And the top of it there is the clitoris. Some of us have it, like, very high with a lot of skin there. And some of us have like a. A little bit more visible. Okay? You have to touch everything. You shouldn't touch only the clitoris. You have to experience all. How do you feel in your folds, in your. In your big labias and in the clitoris and start, like. And start, like, different movements so you can see how you feel better. There is something there. Reading that the left part of the clitoris is more sensitive and has more, like, nerves there. That is in most of the woman, the part that you should stimulate. But I mean, everybody is different. So I encourage to like, explore everything different. If you start feeling great, you have to concentrate on how you feel your body. You have to feel if you lubricate or not. You can start playing after that. Like, reaching inside your vagina is a very good technique that you change from clitoris stimulation to vagina after clitoris stimulation again. Because in that way you can move your sensation from the different part of the vagina. When you touch inside your vagina, you also are touching your clitoris because not much people know that the clitoris is inside. And it's like giving a hug to a vagina. When you see the vagina in the back, there is a whole part of the clitoris that is inside the vagina. I can, I mean, for those who are not seeing it, imagine like the clitoris is the person who is riding a horse. The vagina is the horse body. Okay? Okay. And the cliff. Yes. And the clicher is, is the person who is, you know, in the, in the horse body.

There's a lot of different areas. Yeah.

Yes. The, the head of the person is the head of the clitoris that you see outside your vulva, but inside your vulva is like the neck, the body and the legs of the person. Okay. So when you put your finger inside your vagina and you touch the, like the ceiling of the vagina, the part that is, you know, through your belly, you are touching all the center of your clitoris. And if you go aside from your vagina, imagine your vagina is a clock. And if you touch the 12 o', clock, okay, you are touching directly the part of the corp of the pleturis. If you touch between 3 o' clock and 9 o' clock in your vagina, you're touching all the parts, the bulbs of the clitoris and all the nerve of the clitoris. So that's a technique that you can use to find your G spot. Your G spot is in that part of the vagina, like 3 cm, 4 cm. When you put your finger inside your vagina between 3 o' clock and 9 o'. Clock. So if you use that technique like going between external stimulation and vaginal stimulation, doing the clock exercise, that is, that's a good exercise describing in sexologies to improve your, your sensation inside the vagina. You might have like a orgasm that come from clitoris and also from vagina. After you do that for a while yourself, you can try with your partner with the fingers or with the penis, and you can start playing. And in that way, even though you do not get the orgasm right away, you're gonna get it sometime going to feel a lot of pleasure. That's the important part that you have to be pleasure during all the process.

Okay. One More question here. And then I'm going to have to do, like, a whole series with you about below the belt, because I can talk to you forever, but I'm going to keep this laser. So one more question. Sex toys. Why do people, like, talk to us about that? Because people think like, oh, it's porn, it's bad, it's bad. But you have a different thought on that, so can you share about that? And why are they important?

All right, let's see. Sex toys are. Toys are an extension of our fingers. Okay. Sometimes when our fingers do not reach. Sex toys can reach there inside the vagina. There are a lot of spots that are, like, deeper that can stimulate a lot of pleasure in a woman. And sometimes they are reached a lot better with sex toys. Sex toys are a way of. That a woman has to know herself, her reaction, her body part, her original parts. And sex toys can be instruments between a couple to, like, go out, out of the routine. Monotony that are very frequently when we spend a lot of time together as a couple. And monotony and routine are like the worst enemies of sexual desire. So toys. I love them. I have, like, a bunch of it. I'm a. I'm officially the tester of the sex toys in my. In my company because my. Me and my partner, I have. You know, I have been married for 23 years. And let me tell you that in this journey since me and my partner, Dr. Claire Sanyo, open, sensual. I mean, it has been the most pleasurable time with my husband because my imagination, my resources, my. I mean, I have gone out of the routine and. Or the common sex always. And it has given like a spark. A spark, you say? Like a chain.

Yeah.

In your relationship. So this is the thing that she.

Sent that when my husband saw it, he was like, whoa. Twice.

Yeah. Thanks for your. It was very, very. Yeah. A very good way to improve your relation to get out of the routine. I mean, if you use it every day, it's gonna be a routine.

So be careful there because you'll be.

Yeah, be careful with that. I mean, if you are alone, okay, you can do it yourself. But if you are with your partner, you have to, like, include it in. In the play of the couple or use it sometimes yourself to get satisfaction. Yourself is permitted. Okay. But you have to be aware of one. The toy has to be made of silicone. That it. That has no latex is better. And medical grade silicone. Medical grade silicone has no micropores, so it won't be like something that that bacteria stick on. So medical silicone is very important in a sex toy. Okay? Okay. Second stuff that you have to be aware using sex toys is that you have to change the way you use it every time. You cannot get accustomed to one rhythm and one breath vibration. Because if you use it, for example, in a high, high, high level after, you're going to get like a little bit difficult to get an orgasm without the toy. Okay. So you're going to vary it used to it. So you have to be like different vibration mode. So choose a good toy that have different controls so you can modify the, the pattern of vibration and the intensity of vibration. Okay. But definitely I love toys and I use it in my personal life. And every woman that I recommend a toy, they have been experienced like a great sex after it even. It's very useful for, for us as a sexologist to teach a woman who has never had an orgasm, to teach her how to fill orgasm is easier with a toy at the beginning. And after she can go through that learning, you know, experience with the finger with the button and, and stuff. So definitely recommend that. But you have to, you know, try and toys and see which one is better for you.

Well, Dr. Sophia, this has been fascinating. I think it's fascinating. I hope people listening are finding it fascinating. Okay, listen, you got to go check out all of her products because as you can see, she's a super passionate call. Sexologist, sexologist. She has an amazing doctor. She, she understands women. She understands midlife women. Her products, I can vouch for them, they are fantastic. She sent me a whole box. Like I said, my husband and I were like, what the heck? We love this. Like, lots of good stuff. There's stuff for your husband in there. There's stuff for you. There's like, she's got everything. You got to check out her store. Now listen, here's the deal. Her website is completely in Spanish. So they did something really nice for us. They actually made a whole page just for us. If you don't speak Spanish and if you go, you can find it by going to zensual.com I'm going to spell it for you. Z, E, N Z s, u, a l.com forward slash Natalie Jill. Zensual.com forward slash Natalie Jill will also put it in the show notes. Wherever you're watching this, you'll find it underneath, but check it out, you'll find that. And listen, Dr. Sophia, I've got to have you back. I'm gonna, I'm gonna put you on my social media we're gonna do a whole series around below the think these questions are important and not enough women are listening to them.

That I so.

So everyone so remember zombie want to spell it Z E N Z s u a l.com forward/ Natalie Jo remember the rest of the website is in Spanish so bear with us but we do have that page that is in English so you can find more and I'm going to be featuring Dr. Sophia more on my social media so stay tuned for more below the bell topics. Also if you're listening to this and you want to know more things from her more questions that you have any questions have ask us below. Send me a DM Send them a dm. We just want to know because I am going to bring you back on my social media because I need to we have a lot of questions and I just love your personality so thank you for being here today.

Thank you.