HRT, Self Tanner & Lip Wrinkles - Midlife Chitchat with Lori Ebanietti

Welcome back to midlife conversations. Today I'm doing something a little different, following my conversation with Brooks because many of you messaged me that you liked that banter. So I thought, you know what? Let me bring on one of my friends in midlife. This is my friend Lori Abenatti that I'm going to introduce you to in a minute. Now, she's a newer friend. I only met Lori when I moved to Arizona about eight months ago. I met. I'm going to tell you how we met. The reason I wanted to have her on is me sharing about HRT recently and how I always share about fat loss and how we age. I bring on experts all the time. I've had some of the best doctors, some of the best authors, some of the best experts. But I want to bring this down to just real girl talk. These are conversations that me and my friends have, real time. And I thought instead of just doing this privacy on our own, let me open the conversation up to you. I think we might be able to actually break things down, explain them a lot simpler than some of the interviews I've done. Now, this doesn't mean don't go back and listen to the interviews. I want you to listen to the interviews we've done on hormones and HRT and menopause, all those things. But I want to also bring you into a real time conversation in case you haven't act. Had access to these types of conversations. So thank you so much for being here today, Lori.

Oh, I'm so happy to be here. This is so fun.

So I want to back up. And Lori listens to my podcast, so she's, she's familiar with what you all are listening to and she loves to chime in. She'll always send me a message and go, oh, but I'm glad you covered this. Or what about that? It. So she's been real good, real time, first and foremost. Lori, your birthday is coming up. It's like this week, I think, right?

It's next week, a week from today. I can't believe it. 57.

57. Okay. How does that. How can it be? How can it be? How can it be? I know. That's what I always, I always think, like, I, I forget that I'm not. I mean, you. I look in the mirror and I realize I'm not 20. But sometimes I forget, like, your. Our minds still go to that. And then I'll say something and my daughter will go, mom, don't say that again. That's. That's like, you sound old people say.

1980S, I think, like, that was 20 years ago. Right, Right.

I know. Isn't that crazy? It's like so long ago now.

I know, but 57, I do. I mean, to that point, I feel like that same person inside of me. And I'm not trying to look 20, but for 57, I am trying to keep it together. And it gets harder a little bit every year. But as you know, there are things we could do to feel better and to be better at.

Absolutely. And you're doing a good job at it. You're doing an absolute good job at it. So first, I want to share how we met. So I just. I had just moved to Arizona, and this is important because some of you are, like, struggle to have new connections and friends in midlife. And I. And I think Lori is like me. We are definitely extroverted. We definitely are fueled up by having other friends. Like, I'm a social person. I need to be in community. I have to have friends. And I don't mean extroverted. Like, I like to be wild at parties all the time, but I definitely need my girl time. I need connection. I need friends. And when I moved to Arizona, that was one of the things I was actually really worried about because I had such a great network of girlfriends in San Diego. And I thought, this is going to be really weird. Like, I'm not used to not having friends around to go do things with. So when I moved to Arizona, one of the girls that was following me on Social Gina, she sent me a message and she said, hey, I know this might sound out there to you, but there's a group in Scottsdale on Facebook, like a girlfriend's group, so you should join it. So totally out of my character, I joined it. And I just made a post in there and I said, hey. I just described me and I said, I'm a girly. Granola is what I called myself. I like active things. I'm girly. I'm just looking for friends. I just moved to this area. I would love to find other girls that are active in my age group. And I shared my age. And another girl, our friend Charmin, responded to me and said, hey, I just moved here too. We have a great group that's been hiking. Let's meet up for a hike. And I said, awesome. So I went on, like, a blind date hike. But I asked, told Charman. I said, let's post in the group and have see who else will join. Well, Lori came. Lori, who's on right now, she came and her friend Erica came, and literally, like, I became instant friends with Lori and Erica, which was so cool. And we've been friends ever since.

It's so true. And you know that group. I did join the group. And you had a great experience from the jump. I had a different experience. I put myself out there and I kissed a lot of frogs until I found ladies. I did. But you have to try and you have to put yourself out there, because they do say one of the things about growing gold successfully is to have a tribe. And I left my tribe back in New Jersey, so I had to find a new tribe out here. So now you're part of my tribe.

Yes. But you weren't even a member of that group, Right? Like, you just had met her. Is that. Or were you a member in that group?

I went on a lot of dates with a lot of.

Oh, okay, so you tried a lot of them, and then you're like. And then you came on. What made you say yes to this hike?

Well, you know, I. I. Charmin just has such good energy. It just came right through the screen. So I met with Charmin. She actually came to my workout class, and then we hiked together for a second date, and then she invited me to the third date. I'm like, sure, why not? I dragged Eric along, and it was. It was love at first sight.

I love it. I love it. So then. And then, of course, Lori and I realized our husbands had a lot in common. So we ended up introducing them, and they bec. Same buddy. So it's been like a whole thing. So she was officially my first friend moving to Scottsdale. You're my first friend. And I. And I love that. But what I also love about Lori is that we share a lot of similarities as far as our health journey, our. Our journey with hrt, our journey just in general around fitness. So I wanted to talk a lot about that too, and. But just to close the loop on that connection thing, for those of you that are like, I want more friends, I want more girlfriends, I'm going to tell you, you got to put yourself out there and be uncomfortable a little bit. In addition to start little hiking group, which I don't really know that I've done much with the hiking group other than I met Lori and Erica from IT and a couple other women from it But I also wanted some entrepreneurial business connections. So I decided I was like, you know what? I need to create an entrepreneurial business group. And I just decided, like, as I would go about my day, if I met A girl that kind of fit into that profile, I'm going to invite them into my group. So I did that same thing and I've met some really great friends from that. And I just started like, I call it collecting people. It's kind of funny, but like I. Even the surgeon that did my explant, I met his wife. I'm like, oh, she's cute, she's an entrepreneur. But I invited her in. So I just put myself out there and I created a women's group of like 15 women now in Scottsdale, all close to eight my age, entrepreneurs. So I want to share that, that don't. If you're like thinking, I don't have friends and I need more of that, just put yourself out there and ask because you would be amazed. And I know Laura, you meet girls all the time from the gym, don't you?

I do, I do. You know, I always tell people, if you're moving to a new, like, location.

Join a gym and do a class.

Probably class and do at the same time every week or every day. And you'll see the same faces. And before you know it, you'll, you'll have friends.

I love it.

A way to keep your body fit and strong, which we know is so important. I know you want to talk about that a little bit, but really, you know, you meet like minded people.

You do.

Yeah.

I still haven't done a class yet at the gym, but, but funny story too. I, when I first came here, I was like really needing to find a gym that had like the vibe that I wanted. And, and I, I tried so many gyms and I didn't like any of them. I was so bummed. And then I joined this, what everyone said was like the bougie club. And I joined for a month and I just didn't like it. I just. And I had met Lori meanwhile, and she kept saying, come to, come to my gym, come to my gym. So I went to her gym and I'm like, what? I didn't even know this thing was here. Which, by the way, it's Lifetime. I love, I love Lifetime now they're all over the place. But I think Lifetime's done a phenomenal job rebranding, like, work, like, cool. It's like a playground for adults. It's a playground.

It is. We have things to play on all the time. And now they even have these social activities happening outside of the gym.

So I've done none of that yet, but maybe I should.

Yeah, Eric and I went to this summer Salt Sis yoga thing the other night, and my girlfriend Beth sang. It was beautiful. Sound bowls. It was so nice. And just. P.S. they also now have a liquor license. I know we're trying to avoid alcohol in midlife. It's really not the best, but it.

Makes a little fun sometimes. Yeah. Hey, I didn't know about that. I need. Thanks for the invite, Lori. Thanks for the invite. I didn't know about this thing. I also thought about signing up for, like, a. They have a. A pickleball. You want to take pickleball lessons with me there? Maybe we should do that.

Really do. But I have to tell you, I. You know, I think of myself as an athlete. I do. But every time a ball comes zooming to my.

Then we should definitely do it together, because that's how I look at it. Okay.

So.

By the way, Lori, we're gonna get into the. The workout stuff. I promise I'm gonna talk about HRT first. But Lori kicks my butt on hiking, and we'll talk. I've, like, twice been hiking with her, and I embarrassed myself. I have to, like, sit down just to give me electrolytes. She puts me to shame big time. So she's. She's got it together. We're gonna talk about that too. But let's talk about. I want to talk about hrt, and I'm gonna explain. Explain it in super basic. Lori was an elementary school teacher, so we're going to use those same tactics to help teach. And I'm not trying to insult anyone. It's just that I see the questions coming in and I. That it's so flipping confusing. And part of the reason it's confusing is many doctors are actually not educated on this. They just are not. This was not what they're educated on.

It's so true. In fact, my journey was not. It's. It wasn't linear. I, I. When I first went for help, I was actually put on antidepressants, which is so common. They do this and it's not what I needed. And for my doctors back then was that I was too. That I wasn't in full menopause. Right. I was in perimenopause. It was kicking my butt. I had the worst anxiety. I mean, I couldn't get through day to day. Yep. I think. And they put me on antidepressants, and that was absolutely not the right move for me. Antidepressants are appropriate for certain, you know, people when they need.

I think if you actually are depressed and you need them, I understand. I'm not Going to challenge that. But what drives me nuts, I think it's lazy medicine. And I can. I'm just gonna say it. It's lazy medicine when you go in and say, I'm having these symptoms and you are of perimenopause, which is, by the way, 10 years before your day of menopause. Menopause is a day. It's day your period stops after a year. Okay? So 10 years leading up to that, you are in perimenopause. And you got all these things. Brain fog, anxiety. Maybe you can't sleep. Maybe you're starting to get night sweatshirt, hot flashes, moodiness, libido changes, a vaginal dryness. Like the list goes on. Okay? When you go in and you say, I have these problems, and your doctor says you're in perimenopause, here's an antidepressant and birth control pills. Find a new doctor, period. End of story.

Find a new doctor, you know, and you don't know when you're 10 years away from menopause. I'm 57. And just to put it out there, I had a period a few months ago, so I'll be 57 on Sunday. So really, technically, I can't even be in full menopause until a year after that. So the youngest I can be in full menopause is at the age of 57. But you don't know that, right? No. No. So if somebody comes in with these symptoms and they're even in their early 40s, they could absolutely. Or even late 30s can absolutely be suffering from perimenopause. Yes.

Now, okay, I want to speak into a few of these things, too. So first of all, people, something to go. Why is it bad? Okay, first of all, I was on birth control pills for 30 years, and I wish I had not been, but I was. I was started then when I was a teenager. Maybe it's been 30 years. So I went on at age 15. What the heck? 25. 35. I went. I was on for 20 years. Sorry. I was on for 20 years. 15. I didn't know what I know now. I did not know. But. So I got it. Like, you're in. I'm not gonna go there. I don't think I would do it again knowing what I know now. But if you're. If that's you, you're. You're trying not to get pregnant. I got it. That's a different reason. But to tell a menopausal perimenopausal woman that we need to put you Birth control pills. Because of this. That is lady medicine. Same with antidepressants. For that reason, if you are actually depressed, that's a whole different story.

Right?

But what I want you to consider is our hormones start to tank. They start to tank and change. Estrogen, testosterone, progesterone, they start to tank and change during perimenopause. So I know it's called hormone replacement. I look at it as hormone replenishment. Replenishment, just getting you back up. And I want to share this. When you go to the doctor and they test your hormones, this is what happens. You go to a regular doctor with your insurance or whatever, and they. Not all, but many. And they say, oh, your estrogen is at a 25.

But.

And they look at your age and they go, oh, but you're 52. You know what? You are in normal range. That's what they tell you. Okay, Got it. Yes. For post menopausal, you've done your period, you are. Your estrogen drops. That is normal range for the average person at that age. But why are you normal? Do you want to be normal or do you want to be optimal? Now, if you want to be optimal, you want to go to where you were feeling your best when you were younger. So if you look at like a pro. Yeah, go ahead, Lori.

I was gonna say, not only that, I mean, estrogen is protecting us, it's protecting our bones, right? It's protecting so many women develop osteoporosis. It's protecting our muscle, it's protecting our brains, it's protecting our brain health. Right? So all of it, right? So it's. You want to get on this, the hormone replacement therapy sooner rather than later to reap the benefit.

Years ago, years ago it was realized this is. I remember my mom going through this. That like menopause in itself or that declining hormone is increasing your risk greatly for all types of disease, all types of age related problems, okay? It's increasing it greatly. So they, at one point, years ago, they would like 75 of women, they were just prescribing estrogen. Now that they were not prescribing it the way that it is now, the bioidentical. But it was helping. And then overnight they did this Women's Health Initiative study that has since been shown to be flawed. Like they have come back, they debunked it. It was flawed. And I've done so many episodes about this. But. But they scared women and said estrogen causes cancer. That has been completely debunked, Completely debunked Now, synthetic estrogen, synthetic progestins, synthetic problem think can absolutely lead to that. But bioidentical, where it's just having your body mimic the response of estrogen that is not related to cancer. In fact, there's a lot of studies that show it prevents. Now, before you message me and go send me the studies, you're not a doctor, I'm not a doctor. I'm not claiming to be. And I'm not going to be the research agent for you sending a million studies. But you can happily go listen to any episode I've done. You can do some digging yourself on this, and you will come to that same thing. You will find that same information.

It's true. And unfortunately, a lot of doctors are not even updated on this because they don't have to be, which is so sad. They're continuing education. They're not required to study up on this. So your gynecologist might not be up on this. Another thing learned about hormone replacement is vaginal estrogen, which actually stays localized. Right? So let's say you're a person take estrogen because certain cancers or what have you, most people can take it vaginally. And it helps with UTIs. Now, one thing that I saw when my father got quite ill was that UTIs don't just make you feel uncomfortable. And then you need to drink cranberry juice. Remember, like growing up if you had a uti? No, it actually affects your brain, and it makes them so sick and almost delusional. So many older women suffer from UTIs and causes so many terrible things in their health. I mean, it can make them disorientated. All of a sudden, people could think that they're developing Alzheimer's. No, it's a ut, and vaginal estrogen helps prevent that.

Now, I also want to share. We're going to talk about, like, the kind that we're taking. I am not telling every woman to go take hrt. Like that is. Not everyone's on their own personal journey. But what I want to share is you should at least understand it and make a decision for yourself. And it's also not a badge of honor when someone's like, well, I'm all natural at all. First of all, it is natural. It is natural. You're. It's mimicking. It's bioidentical. And you're just replenishing so you can feel back to your normal self. So I'm not telling you you have to do it or you don't. But what I don't Want to happen for you, which I have seen happen for many women. They think they're riding through it just great. I did too, until I'm almost 53 and now I'm like, holy cow, I'm having a lot of hot flashes. All these things. And I realize my estrogen is not even a 20 on my blood tests. Super low. And I'm glad I caught it because had I not caught it, not just my mood, my attitude, all those things, my health would deteriorate and I, it could get to a point where it's too late. So be up to date on like, like at least learn and explore this yourself and find a doctor that understands this. I don't actually want my OB gyn, who happens if, if they're not up to speed on this, to prescribe it for me. Like you want someone that actually understands it to prescribe it for you.

You do. And you know somebody that's up on all of the latest research and it is so important. During the peak before I started my hormone replacement, I was having hot flashes, I want to say 20 night sweats a night.

Oh yeah, that's how I was.

It was terrible, awful. Blankets on, blankets off, blankets on. And it was just all night and I wasn't sleeping. And it got so bad that I started doing sleep deprived activities such as backing up into the wall at the end of my driveway. You know that wall, that retaining wall.

Oh my gosh.

Came right out of my garage, right into the wall of my brand new car. That was sleep deprivation. Yeah, yeah.

So yeah, I had that. I can check from my aura ring. Like I could see. It was like all. Now I just sleep right through the night. Now here's the crazy thing. I actually was on hormone replacement for many years. I just wasn't on strong enough. I was taking a very, very, very low dose of Bias, which is a cream. And then I was doing small doses of testosterone and progesterone to balance it out. But, but my, my estrogen had fully tanked when my period stopped, like it fully, it fully tanked and so I was all of a sudden five hot flashes an hour. Get like the night sweats, all of it. So my doctor, who's Anna Kabeca, who I've had on before many times, she was like, let's. She didn't. She's smart, she's like, we're not going to jump it all up at once. Let's go higher on the cream first. When that still wasn't making a dent, she's like, all Right, we're moving you over to the patch, which. Let's talk about that for a minute. I want to talk about the differences. So from what I've understood. And Lori, interrupt me if you've been taught something different. But from all my interviews, I've understood that progesterone you want to take in pill form. You want to always do that in pill form, and you want to cycle it so you don't do it the whole month. Do you do yours the whole month, Laurie? Cycle.

I do mine every single night. And you know, if you have a womb, right. If you. If you had a hysterectomy, you don't need progesterone, but if you still have your parts, you need progesterone, and that does prevent the cancers. Progesterone also helps you sleep at night, which is another hack for. Yeah, so I. 100 milligrams, I believe it is every night.

So I do 200 milligrams, and I do it most nights. I can't fully cycle it because I don't have a period anymore. So I don't know. I can't, like, measure that. But what Anna's asked me to do is take at least seven days off. So she said so. So with. According to her, I do seven days off and then I do it the rest of the month for progesterone. For testosterone, I do a low dose bioidentical cream that I put on my. My wrist. It's very. So my testosterone is actually not high. I. I think a lot of doctors overprescribe test. And then I had actually a woman message me this morning on Instagram, and she's like, I was on testosterone and, you know, I grew hair on my body and my jaw changed. I'm like, whoa. Like that. Somebody gave her too much testosterone. You've got to test your blood.

You do. I get tested now. At the beginning was every three months. Now it's every six months. And I'm also testosterone. I take the shot. In fact. Okay, today's the day for my shot.

Yay. Yay. Do you do it yourself at home? Is it like a shot? You do it?

Yeah. So I could do it or John will shoot me up. It's always better.

Like every three months or. How often do you do the shot?

Once a week I do it. It's a very small.

Once a week. Okay. Okay. So I might at some point do that too. Right now the cream is working, so I'm looking. I look at my levels, and I'm not looking to be on the high side. I'm looking to be an optimal. So I. I do that cream. So then the estrogen. There's all different ways to take it. I think you and I both agree. We're fans of bioidentical. There's different times. And for those of you listening, there's different types. There's Bi Est A cream, which is a mixture of estradiol and some other. I don't, I don't. I'm gonna say it all wrong. It's like a mixture. Do you know, Gloria? What that's.

I don't. Because I now, you know, like you.

Yeah.

So.

So, well, if you. If you got. So, by the way, my. I'm just a quick shout out to my friends on Instagram. The wise and well, girls, Maria and Kristen, they are hormone educators. And so a lot of what I've learned is actually from them. And they have a new book. You can pre order, by the way. You can find that. I don't even know if you go to their Instagram Plays it page. It's wise and well, and I'm sure it's on Amazon. You can pre order. But they taught. They have always spoken out about why they're not fans of bias. And they told me for the last year, like, I don't think you're going to be happy with bias. I don't think you're gonna be happy with it. And they, they were right. It was not enough later. So I'm on straight. Then I switched to the higher dope, more estradiol. And then now I do the patch, which is straight estradiol, which is what you're on. And I love the patch.

It's great. I've been on. I started at the very lowest dose, which is, I believe, 0.025. And I did and everything. The hot flashes stopped, the night sweat stopped. It was the lowest dose. And I knew I was eventually going to have to go up. And after, I guess about six months, I did go up to 0375, which that's where I am right now. I tried up to the.05, but then I started, you know, PMS, my breast.

Okay, so I'm on.05 and I feel great. And I think that's because I was just. Do you know what your blood numbers were? Do you remember by chance, like, what they are now when you're on replacement?

I would have to look it up, but I do, I do get checked every six months. Because when you replacement want to be checked, you have to really be checked. It's important.

So my point.05. Like, I. We haven't retested yet, and I need to. But my estrogen on my blood was. Was 20. Like, which was so low. It's like, basically saying, Natalie, you are 85 postmenopausal. Like, and my FSH was super high. So Anna's like, you are, like, non existent with the estrogen. So we did 0.05. And I feel great. Brooks has to hide from me at this point because I. Your sex drive is. Mac. I'm just saying. I hope my daughter's not listening. Sex drive is back, like, big time. Lori and I joke about that. Lori, can I tell you a funny story about the gym?

That was hysterical. Yeah, go for it. Yeah, you tell it.

You're so funny.

When I was at the gym. That one. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. So, you know, I'm going along eight months without a period. I'm thinking, okay, I'm in menopause. Then one day at the gym, I'm looking around the gym like, everybody looks so attractive today. No, I was definitely getting a little sweaty and not from the workout. You know, A week later, after eight months, I got my period.

That's funny. She was ovulating and on estrogen double hormones. Yeah, that's hysterical. So I could tell, like, all of a sudden, I was like, oh, something's normal. So it's not just testosterone that increases your sex drive, ladies. It's estrogen, too. So. So that my hot flashes instantly stop. No more night sweats. My brain. This is wild. This. This thing is really. I don't. Laurie, you're not really adhd, so I don't know if this one resonates with you, but I've been ADHD my whole life, and I. And I love it. I think it's an advantage. I like having adhd. It gives me creative thoughts. It gets me excited. And in the last, like, year or two, I was kind of like, all of a sudden, things just weren't as adventurous. Like, I used to chase different interests. Like, I'm interested in this. I'm interested in that, which is add, right? But that kind of died off. And I would look at things in my business, like, I don't. I don't really feel like it. As soon as I started the patch again, my ADD came back. And. Which tells me. And I. Because I texted that to Anna, she's like, it's because your brain health is. Is back to normal. Like, that is a total. You want to feel how you always Have?

Yeah. You want to get your judge back? That's what my girlfriend Gladys says. And then she started hormone replacement therapy. You got her judge back.

Yeah.

Just being you, right? I'm not looking to be anything more than who I am.

That's exactly right. Okay, now, so another little funny story about the clicker and the stuff that we put on our arms before I switch to the patch for those of you on it. So when Anna first switched me to the estrogen, the higher estradiol for the cream, she sent it as a clicker, and she did that so we could, like, test amounts, like, do a one click. Well, I didn't know the lid was on. I kept clicking, clicking, clicking. I probably clicked it like, seven times. And then I'm like, oh, the lid's on. So I took it off, and I wasn't thinking, and I just, like, put the whole thing on me. Okay. Anyways, an hour goes by, and I turn into bitch crazy woman. Like. Like, Brooks is like, what the frick is wrong with you? And I. I was like, what's wrong with you? Like, it was like PMS times 5,000. So it took until a little bit later that day, and I connected the dots. I'm like, oh, that's what I did. So you do need to take it seriously. I know, but what I did like about the cream is when I was in Europe, before I started the patch, I was still getting the five. Five lashes an hour, and they are annoying. And I put the cream on, and they would stop for, like, a couple hours, and they come back with a vengeance. So I carried the cream with me. Kind of like the little old ladies that carry Werther's with them. I was, like, carrying my bias my buy ice cream with me. Why do they carry Werther's with them? I don't know, but they do. There was a lady on the plane. I watched every five minutes, she put a new Werther in her mouth. So anyways, I was like, I would smear my cream on constantly, constantly. And then Brooks got his blood test back, and it had, like, higher estrogen. I'm like, oh, shoot. I think I got it on my husband. Not higher, like we have a warning, but higher than normal for him. It's like, that's my craving. There's a cream.

The patch is so nice. It's just once, twice a week. Yes. Fabulous.

You change it every three and a half days. Because the week. Seven days. So three and a half days. So I change mine on Wednesdays and Sundays, and it's so easy. You don't see it. It's clear. It goes on your stomach. You put yours on your stomach. Is that where you put yours?

Yeah. Really low though, you know, like. Yeah, I have Emi, but I have my Brazilians. I put it a little bit.

Yeah, Yeah. I put it low, but so. And then do you feel anything when you put it on? For me, like within the first 30 minutes, I get a little tiny twinge of a. Like a little menstrual cramp. And then that's it. Then it goes.

I don't really feel anything. In fact. Oh, my goodness. True story. I was just in Vermont for a funeral. My son in law's dad died unfortunately. And I brought my patch because I knew I had to change it. But I was out of my routine, you know, So I took it off, I showered, I went to the funeral. I was out all day. I went to sleep that night. I woke up the next morning.

You forgot about it.

I didn't have my patch on. My gosh. I was so afraid that something terrible was gonna happen. It was okay. It all worked out fine.

Did you get any hot flashes or anything when it was off?

No, I, I. Thank goodness I didn't.

But I think it stays in us. I think as long as we switch it within the.

Yeah, yeah.

I usually switch it at the same time. Like I basically put the new one on and then pull the old one off.

So. Yeah, well, usually I take it off before the shower, then shower. Because residual step on your.

I use a little alcohol swab. It's good.

Okay.

That's what I'll get you for your birthday. Alcohol swab.

Oh, there you go. It's functional too.

Old lady gifts. I bought them where there's an alcohol swabs.

Yeah, no, I have my red light mask that I've been wearing every day. Right. And then it has the holes, you know, it has the eye holes, you know.

Right.

But I put it on my neck because I'm like, all right, I have to get my neck. So I'm gonna have like a smiley face on my neck. And now I'm like, I'm putting it on my belly too, because I'm sk is loose. So I'm gonna have a smiley face.

You gotta come use my big red light panel. I have one here. You can just sit in front of the whole thing. A lot easier than the face you're trying to patchwork with your face mask.

I really am. I should buy the neck one and the hand ones because. Oh my gosh. Because of you. No nail polish, by the way.

Oh, look at that. See, I'm running, I'm getting. You have to do the Dazzle Dry because that one, that one's amazing and non toxic.

I know. I'm rehabbing them right now.

It's been almost two weeks that just Dazzle Dry. It's great. Yeah, it's, it's, it's. I got all kinds of ideas for your birthday now. Dazzle Dry, alcohol and Werther's.

There you go.

That's what you're gonna get. That's what you're. Okay, so, so back to the hormone situation. You also. There's another type that her and I are not doing but you can do like it's called a tro, right? It's like a lozenge that you put in your mouth that has your combination of your estrogen and your testosterone. I've got friends that do that. I don't know much about, about that one. But here's what for those of you listening, they're like, I want to explore more. I want to understand more about hormones. There's a couple things I'm going to suggest. Number one, follow wise and well, because they are educators. They're not doctors, but they educate on all of this. They've got a great new book coming out. I've t any doctor I've had on this on this show like Anna Kabea, the gutsy gynecologist, Dr. Jen Simmons, her episodes coming out soon, I've had Sabrina Salt. Those are all great resources to also listen to about hormones. But here's, here's the other thing I'm going to say, and this is an unpopular opinion and I wish this was not the truth, but it is. We can't let hor. We cannot let insurance dictate our treatment. If you are looking for your insurance covered doctor to dictate your treatment within a five minute consult, that is not going to be ideal. That's not going to work. Most doctors, this is not going to be a thing that they do. It's usually more concierge out of pocket. Naturopathic doctors, functional medicine doctors that, that do this. Both Lori and I use functional medicine or naturopathic doctors for this. Now I do think insurance sometimes covers hormones but a lot of times your good consults around this are not going to be from insurance.

It's true. And you know, being a retired teacher, the thing is I do have great health insurance. So all of my bioidentical estrogen is covered. My progesterone is covered. They still do not testosterone, because look at that.

Yeah. And I pay out of pocket for all mine. I don't have. I actually, it's a whole other. It's a whole other episode about insurance and why I don't like it and my issues with it. That's. That's a whole rant for another time. I'm a fan of health shares, but if I had your situation, Lori, and had like a, you know, guaranteed, that would be awesome. Or if I lived in another country where things were covered. But so just be prepared. I think it's. Ladies. I do think it's worth the investment to find somebody that understands this, that can actually test your blood and can look at these things and really help you dial in. Optimal. But the keyword is optimal. You want to say, I want help with optimizing my hormones, not what's average or normal. Because you are not average or normal. You're. You're leveling up your life like you want that next. That next level. Okay, so I think we answered. Did I miss anything on the hormone part, Lori. That I did.

Talking about how it also helps our skin. Did we talk our skin?

For sure. Yeah. I wish it would help brown spots, though. Dagnabbit. How do we get rid of brown spots?

If I could go back in time, I would tell my younger self a few things. Number one, don't worship the sun. So yes, for sure.

Yes.

Number two, lift heavy weights, which that's one thing that I did.

Well, we're going to talk about that in a minute. That's a good one.

And wear a supportive bra. I mean, you know, those would be. Supportive bra.

Yeah. I would tell my younger self. Self, do not be tannorexic sick. Because I. I didn't just worship the sun. I like, full on. Made it a false idol. Like, I. What the heck was I do? I would be in a tanning bed every day. I used to have. I used to work at a tanning salon. And I would get anxiety if I was not laying on a raft in the pool in the summer. Like, I had to be. I had tanorexia. I have full tanorexia. I am so grateful that at age 24, I had basal cell carcinoma. And I saw what they took out of me. It was like this little dot that. And they took out this big lump out of my chest. And it stopped me cold turkey. I'm like, I will not be sunbathing anymore. And for those of you that want to be like, but the sun's Good for us. I agree. Vitamin D is good. Some sunlight is good for us. Tanorexia is not good for you. No.

It's brown spots, and it makes your skin creepy. Right?

Yeah.

So the thing. I'm more.

For those of you that are 20 or 30, that you're like, I. Tanning is healthy. It's amazing. Come talk to me when you're 52 and let's look at your skin, because I am very grateful that I stopped when I did. I am. And I. The brown spots that I can, like, connect the dots on me are all from that. And no laser does not remove them. I've done it. I've done all the lasers. Does not remove them. They come right back.

They do. They come right back.

Yeah, they always come back. I hate. I spent so much money on those. So if anyone out there has truly invented something to get rid of brown spots, like, really, I.

That you.

It actually works. I want to know.

I want to.

You be on my show. I want you to tell me. I will sell your product for you because we know something that works. And don't tell me about that. Like one of those, like, muesli or whatever, because those are toxic cream. Like, a lot of those creams. I don't. If you. What that does to your liver is not good. So all I had to see was liver numbers when I tried to use a bleaching cream. No, I'm not. I don't want that. I want. But if you actually have something that truly removes it that's not toxic, I'm all ears.

And if it stays out. Right. Not if it comes right back. Because that's right.

The other thing. I don't know if you know this story. Do you ever use the spray tan?

I used to back in the day, but then I remember thinking, oh, it's activating now. I could smell it activating. And then I was like, smell it activating. That can't be good for your. Like, what are you putting?

Okay, so you know why I stopped spray tanning? Okay. Yes. That. Like, it's got to be. Even if they say it's organic or natural, like, what does that smell? But the other thing is, on older skin, it does not look good. I'm sorry. I know you guys think it looks good on you. It does not look good. You look like a Dorito on leather. It just doesn't look good. When I see my friends that are in their 50s and 60s spray tanning, it doesn't look good. And I. And I'm that friend that Will tell you. I'm like, what's going on? Why are you having brown and orange patches all over you? It doesn't look good on dry skin with lines and brown spots and it makes all your brown spots darker.

And by the way, one other thing. If we could figure out how to get rid of these lines over here.

Oh, yeah, how do I get. I have those two. Smoke, man.

And by the way, do not drink from a Stanley Cup. Sorry, I'm guilty.

I'm drinking out of my Hydroflax. That's probably what's causing it.

Look, but don't suck. See? Make that face.

Yeah, I just did it. You're right.

Oh, you gotta, like, just, you know.

Okay, I'm switching. I'm switching as of today. No more straws.

No more.

Okay, good, good. So, because I have those too, and I never smoked, I'm like, what is this? What's going on?

What's happening there?

So, okay, but what do you do instead of self tanning? I'm going to tell you, this is awesome. You can buy. So there's a really cheap one at the drugstore. I'm sure it's toxic. I don't care. It's cheap. It's like $5. It's the Sally Hansen. Have you seen. It's like, it's a spray that you use. It like puts a tan on you, but it just covers all the brown spots. It's nice. Like a body makeup, airbrushing kind of thing. Yes. Yeah. And then I just tried one recently from Westmore Beauty, too, which was really good. And the key is you. If you put it lotion on first or. And then put it on, it will get on everything. Like, you're gonna leave. You're gonna go to, like, your friend's house and sit on their couch. You're gonna be embarrassed because you're gonna leave a shadow. So don't do that. But this is what you can do if you don't put lotion on. So you gotta strategically plan. You really dry your skin off. Like drop brush and then dry your skin off. And then you put it on and you fully let it dry. Like, let it dry. And then I take a dark washcloth, I don't wet it, and I just kind of wipe over it. Then it stays on you. And like, you say it'll stay on for like three days. If you don't want, you don't scrub. And then I won't.

You know, you could like, you could do a whole podcast on this.

Yeah, it looks good. I think I sat on your white furniture and it did not come off. So see, it works. And. But what I do do is I, when I travel, like, if I'm going to be. This is, this is a little much. And you.

That's okay.

The lengths we go to. If I'm gonna, if I want to look tan and I want to do that, I'm going to be in like a bathing suit and I want to go in the water, whatever. I bring a black towel with me because I don't want to be at like a hotel or a resort and get it all over the White House. So I, I bring a black towel and I. That way I look, people are like, wow, she looks so tan. She has no brown spots. Well, it's makeup and it stays on and it's great. It's way better than self tanner, which looks terrible over after 50.

The thing about travel, so now I have to travel with my needles, you know, like, if I'm going more than a week, I'm like, you do? Yeah, I have to go through, you know.

They let you do it. Do you tell them what do you do?

They do. Because if it's in a prescription bottle and you have your needles, they'll let you just think about it. They let diabetics travel with insulin one.

Oh, that's a good point. You just, you have to. Do they ask you what they're for or whatever?

I, they haven't, but I'm, I'm just saying. And I did bring them to Europe last year. I had to bring them into Sicily. I was there for two weeks. I couldn't be without my testosterone.

Oh, yeah. Yeah, that's right. So let's talk about some of the other things, because I don't know about you, like you just mentioned, the list gets longer as we get older. One thing that I'm in a phase of, and I'm certainly not perfect at this, I'm not claiming to be all natural by any stretch of the imagination. Like, I'm gonna still color my hair. I have hair extensions. I'm gonna still paint my nails. Like, there's things I'm going to do. I'm going to use my. I'm a look tan in a bathing suit, but I'm in a stand state of undoing. I'm trying to lessen the load. I don't know about you, Lori, but I, I feel like the list can start getting really long of things we do. So I'm on this mission of like, what are things that we can do that lessen the load. Like, I don't want to start getting eyelash extensions and all that because the list just starts going on. How do you feel about all that?

I mean, eyelashes that they don't work on me anyway because I'm like a dude at the gym. I'm working out, sweating. I literally take my shirt and wipe my face or so I can't do. They'll just be.

They bug me too if I do the extensions.

I'm just not girly enough for that. But yeah, I just can't keep up with all that. Right. So what are my have to's? My have to's are sleep. That's a have to. I need a good night's sleep sacrifice that. I have to get my workouts in. I have to get my hair blonded, you know, so those are my have to's.

Yeah.

Everything else, you know, like I said, I'm tapering off, I took the nails off. No more gels. I'm going to try the Dazzle for sure. You know, I just want to do less because. And I want to.

Yeah, that's how I feel like. And I saw, I'm like, pick your things. But I'm trying to make the list a little bit less, by the way, on the Dazzle Dry. Just a quick little tip for those. And I don't, I'm not sponsored by them or anything. I just like it because it dries in five minutes and it's non toxic. And fun fact, the same person that developed it is the one that developed gel nails to begin with. So she was looking for a non toxic option. So. So not every salon does it. So at first I was like trying to find salons that do it. And I know here in Scottsdale, my friend Lana owns Pampered Soul, they do it there. But I'm not always here in Scottsdale and I travel. So what I did is I just went on Amazon and bought Dazzle Dry. You could buy it for like the little kit, the base coat, top coat and the colors you want. So you pay 20 to buy it and then I just bring it to the salons I go to.

You can go to any salon, easy.

Just I just say do this. I just say put this, use this top coat, this base coat, this whatever. And it's easy. So that's a little tip there. So I want to talk about the workout and the eating because you and I have some things we definitely do the same and some things that we don't currently do the same. And first and foremost, you cannot See Lori's butt right now, but she's got it going on for 50 like you have. She's got, like, the perfect legs and. But she's strong but feminine, like so. And she works out hard. Like, she works out hard. I've always taught body weight. I've done weights for sure, but I've been up the body, body weight. I'm stepping more into some weights now, but Lori really crushes it. And I see how you all have heard that you want to add muscle because we lose it in midlife, right? And that's. That's why our metabolism's slowing down. That's why we're putting our pounds. We're losing muscle. Muscle is the longevity thing. The best thing we can do is to add muscle. And where I really see it is not just the physical, but I watch, like, how Lori moves, how she navigates, not getting injured. I watch her on hikes. And that muscle is keeping her young. So I want. Can you speak a little into that? And when have you always done this?

I've always. That's one thing. Like I said, if I could go back in time, I'd say add a girl. Because, you know, I'm so proud that I lifted heavy at a young age because that really served me. As soon as 17, I got a car. I was able to drive myself to the gym because I did not grow up working out at all. The only running I did when I was a teenager was from the police because we were probably drinking beer and cool. So I had no real, you know, fitness expertise whatsoever. I just knew that I felt good when I lifted weights and I felt strong. And from there, I took in the 80s where you wore the thong outside.

Oh, yeah, I did that.

Yeah. Of course, we had the side.

Now they wear the pants that go up the butt. Like, you can see all the anatomy. There was a girl bending over at Lifetime. I'm just going to share this one was like, she was, like, doing some, like, kicks or something. Bending over at Lifetime, and every guy and woman was looking up her hoo ha. And I was like, what does she not realize? You could see every little drop of the anatomy going on in there. Or maybe they like that. I don't know what's going on. I didn't do that.

I don't know. But I'm glad that, you know, people are proud of their bodies. Like, I'm glad that women are feeling good. I am too.

But I don't want to see inside your stuff while we're working out.

I know it's me neither. But, you know, back in the day, it was like aerobics and lifting. I did always lift heavy, but it was about trying to be my smallest version of myself. You know, I wanted to do a lot of cardio because I wanted to be skinny. And, you know, now I'm so grateful that I lifted, because it's really not about being the smallest version of yourself. It's being the self. Right. Because that is. That adds to longevity. Because you know what's not sexy? Not sexy is when you're 80 years old and you sit down with a toilet bowl and you can't stand back up. That is not sexy. Right. Not being able to play with your grandchildren.

No. Not being able to walk a few blocks.

Box.

Just no getting in and out of your car. Just a lot of, like, just movement things. So I. This is where the connection is coming in for me big time. Because I've always had muscle, and I've always worked to that, and I'm working to add more muscle right now. Like, I want to increase my muscle. But where I'm really seeing it now is other friends my age that did not work out, and they're starting to have a lot of issues with this. And my friends that work out, they don't have that same thing like you. If you look at two women from behind, like, walking, you just watch them. You can see, like, you can usually guess someone's age by, like, how they're moving, right? You're like, oh, they can have long hair and all the things, but they. You're like. How they're moving is different. People that work out, they don't have that same thing happen. Like, they stay physically strong and it changes their movement.

It does. And it's protecting our bones, too. Do you know the number one, one of the main reasons that women die when they get older is because they fall, they break a hip, and they don't recover.

Wow.

So this is a matter of life or death, really. Plus, it looks good, right?

What advice would you give for someone who has not been on the workout train or maybe really wasn't lifting or building? Because, like, you teach a pretty intense class. Like, can. Can anyone go just jump in on that? Or do you advise? What do you advise? They start with doing So I. I.

Could differentiate the class to meet anybody's needs because, remember, I was a school teacher, so I'm the queen of differentiat. But that being said, you can gain strength at any age, and it's really important to do that. They've done studies with people even in nursing homes in their 80s, and they put weights in their hands. And these people gained strength and muscle, which does add to your life expectancy. So that's pretty huge. But, you know, start slow. You start with a little bit. And we're not doing, you know, reps of 100 reps either. We're doing lower reps, heavier weight, and you need to eat, you need to feed the machine muscle. Right. So that's another important thing that I think women don't think about. You know, again, trying to be their smallest version of themselves, instead of trying to be the healthiest version of themselves. We now what in protein is back in the 80s and the 90s, remember, it was like the fat free phase.

Yeah. Everything. If it was bad free, it was healthy. You were like, gummy bears are fat free. I will eat a whole bag.

Yeah, I did that.

Rice cakes, gummy bears.

Yeah, totally.

Crystal light, remember? Crystal light?

Yes. But now it is to increase our protein. Right. Especially as older women or midlife women, we must increase our protein.

Yeah. So, but I don't know about you. Like, I. Okay, so I've had many experts on that are like, you have to eat your body weight and protein. I'm a nutritionist by trade, and I absolutely agree with the importance of protein, but I do not agree with obsessing over it and forcing it in because you still need to. If you trying to release weight, you got to create some type of deficit in calories. I mean, I don't. And I'm not a fan of calorie counting, but in general, if you eat too much, you eat too much. Like, and I don't want people forcing it in. And some people are not just eating protein. They're like, forcing in by adding it with other. A lot of other things. And that could be problematic. So I'm. I like leading with protein but not forcing it in and not being obsessive about it.

Right. And I think we both agree how important fruits and vegetables are too.

Yeah. She was at my house. Lori was at my house. I had some friends over and I, I can say because she's a good friend of mine, Sabrina was over. She's the doctor, but her and her husband are carnivore. And Lori and I are definitely not carnivore. But we were. It was like a funny discussion because her husband was trying to convince us, like, why our vegetables were killing us. And we, he was not getting anywhere with us. We were like, we were, we were like, we do not care we will be eating vegetables the rest of our lives. So we, if we're, if it's death by broccoli, whatever. Like, so you could not convince me and Lori that, that vegetables are not good for us.

Right. Imagine we're like, okay, then broccoli would be my cheat food.

Yeah. I'm having some kale today. Lori. We're going out to kale happy hour. Yeah. There was no convincing.

No. And you know, first you could tell when people eat a proper diet and include fruits and vegetables. You can see it in their skin.

Oh, for sure. Yeah.

I.

Look, look, if you're listening, Carnivore is working for you. More power to you. Like, I'm not gonna tell someone to change. I think we're all unique and there's different things.

Things.

I'm just not going to be Carnivore ever in this lifetime. And I don't think Lori is either. I don't agree with it. I don't. I personally, I've just seen too much on the aging side and how important fruits and vegetables are.

That's.

That's my opinion. But you all do you boo you do you. But so Laura, I watch Laura. I've eaten out with Lori a lot of times. She eats very similar to me. We both eat primarily unprocessed, natural, real foods. We focus on protein. We both drink a lot of water. We're going to stop using this, the suck straw thing because it's making the lines on my lips. I guess I just realized that today it was. I was today years old when I figured this out.

Yeah, yeah. Just go old school.

Just go old school. Okay, so a couple, a couple more things and then I, I want to ask you, Lori, but I also want to share with you all if you've listened this far. There's a class I'm doing depending on when you're listening to this. If you're listening to this on day of release piece. I'm doing two classes this week that are totally free if you Natalie class.com Natalie class.com. i'm doing my fat loss as you age class where I'm going to go way deeper on these topics on like the foundation. And I guarantee, I promise you that Laura is doing these things too. Anyone I know that is fit and thriving in midlife? They are doing these fundamental things and it's so important and I'm going to teach this class for free. Now why am I teaching the class for free? Why do I do it twice a year like this? This. Because I open up My Total Body Thrive twice a year, which is an eight week program where I walk through all these things in midlife, including hormones. It's not me teaching it. I teach the fundamentals, the foundation, but I bring in my experts. Like Anna Kabeca comes in with the hormone component. I've got Dr. Amy Hornman teaching thyroid. I've got Carrie Glassman teaching cortisol and insulin. Like, I bring in the experts to this and I'm constantly adding to it. And this round Lori, because of her butt and her muscle, I'm gonna have her do a whole section on muscle building in our midlife. So we're gonna, we're gonna, that's gonna be coming new. But the reason I bring that up is I don't want people to join Total Body Thrive unless they've gone through my fat loss class. Why? Because one, I need to make sure you have the foundation down and you, you like it and it feels good. Two, it's a way to try on my coaching and go, okay, hey, I want to learn more. I want to go deeper with you and your experts. Or you're like, okay, I got what I needed from here and you're not the coach for me and that's fine too. So my goal is not to get everyone that jumps on the class to sign up for Thrive. Not at all. I think like 5 to 10% of you might, but it's for you to try on my coaching and go deeper. There's a lot more I can do on this class than I can do on a quick Instagram post or even a podcast, which is one way. Like in the class I'm gonna be able to actually interact and answer your questions too. So that's NatalieJo Class.com. but before we wrap up, Lori, what am I missing? What do need to know about midlife and thriving? What do you want them to know?

You know my key things. Like I said, get your sleep.

Choose your tribe carefully.

Right. Surround yourself with people that are going to celebrate you and lift you up because that's so important.

Yep.

Get your, lift those weights and I don't know, maybe we just need a full body. Red light.

I've got them here. So I'm gonna, I'm gonna, I actually have two. I'm gonna loan you one of them so you have a full body. I gotta find it. I think it's in our storage. I'm gonna get that for you. You. Because you, you need the full body situation. Okay, so Lori, Lori is not. I brought her into podcast world today. She doesn't have a podcast or any of that yet, but we're gonna. We're gonna get her known by you guys because of her butt. You'll see soon. Where can they find you? Can. Can they go follow you on Instagram? Can they find you there?

Lori Ebonetti. That's my handle on Instagram. So easy.

And she'll start posting some stuff also.

So I teach live at Lifetime North Scottsdale, so come find me class. Just. Oh, yeah.

Try a class with her.

Yeah. And I could get you in. You could try a class, see if you like it.

Oh, you're saying that now? Until you've got a thousand people that send you a tm.

I'll get them in. The more the merrier, you know?

The more the merrier. We love Lori. All right, well, happy birthday, Lori. Thank you so much for being here today. Thank you all. I'll see you all, hopefully register. Save your spot on the class. Natalie, Jill, Class Dot com. I will see you on the next episode.

Bye.