Big Coach Energy w. Ashley Gordon

All my tools sometimes are working in my favor, and then like the next second I'm freaking out. It's a constant dance. Sometimes I'm coaching it, I'm crushing it, and then other times I'm just losing my shit.

Welcome back to the Yes, And podcast. I am your host Bunny Young, serial entrepreneur, retired stuntwoman, mother of 3 amazing kids that you're gonna hear about in this podcast episode, and a builder of a life that I don't need a vacation from, or I don't feel like I need to escape. And on season 2 As you know, we are diving deep with some extraordinary people who are shattering barriers, building legacies, and redefining success on their own terms. I cannot wait to share some of these badasses with you. And today I couldn't be more excited to welcome one of those badasses, Ashley Gordon, who is a true force in the world of coaching and personal transformation. Ash is the founder and CEO of the Quantum Coach Academy company, where she's empowering a new generation of heart-centered coaches to step into their greatness. She's also the visionary behind the Badass Manifestor podcast, a top-rated show that inspires listeners to manifest their biggest dreams and unleash their full potential. With her signature blend of science, spirituality, and strategy, Ashley has guided thousands of individuals to transform their mindset, master manifestation, and remove the blocks holding them back from the life they truly desire. The other thing that I want to say is that she is a friend and she's a fellow CEO mama, and I just cannot wait to get into this conversation. We've already had a little bit behind the scenes, so now I get to bring you guys into it. So Ash, it's an honor to have you here. Welcome to the Yes and podcast.

Thank you so much. Thank you for having me. I love you and I can't wait to jam.

I know, let's do this. Okay, trigger warning, right? We're gonna go right into a topic that I think is going to be a hot button for a lot of people and probably us too. This aspect that everyone's a fucking coach.

Mm-hmm. Yeah.

Do you hear that? Or is that just like in my land of the woods where it's like everyone's a coach?

I mean, everyone in my world is a coach pretty much. Except my high school besties, they're not coaches yet.

Yeah, like, and so as a retired therapist, I had this disdain for hanging up a shingle and being a coach. Yeah. So I, I have this duality that I want to talk about, and I know that you talk about like big coach energy, which I effing love. I have this duality where as a therapist, I'm like, I'm a therapist. You know, which is obviously in the, the human hierarchy of people that are there to support you in your ventures is higher than a coach in my head. Sure. Also, I have this very personal experience where as a therapist, I felt like I had these boxes that I was just bumping up against.

Yes.

And I love coaching and I love being a coach, being able to work outside of those boxes to be able to push towards action, because that's not something that we do as therapists. There's homework, there's healing, but there's no action, there's no goal setting in that aspect.

Sure.

And there's very little accountability, right? Because we're there to listen and it's mostly talk therapy. And something that I love about what you do is you bring so much of the somatics, you bring so much of the body, you bring so much of the energetics into it, which I absolutely love. And so that's the duality of my experience is I had this visceral reaction, and you're not as professional as a therapist. And then also this love affair that I've had with the coaching experience, and this realization that as a D1 athlete, I've always, at the highest level of my performance, had at least one coach. So it just makes sense.

That's such a good reflection. I mean, it's interesting, like, over the years, so many therapists have come through whether privately coaching with me or even coming through QCA to expand their toolbox and whatever. And they've real— they've come up against the same box and pushing those edges of the box and feeling like they're so limited in not only the impact they can have but also the income that they can really bring in by stacking their calendar with just one-on-one clients. And so it's been a lot of expansion, I think, for a lot of therapists who can blend their gifts with coaching and have that be like so next level for their clients, but also for themselves and the life that they want to build and create. But yeah, I think that's really common.

So how would you describe coaching, and what conversation would you have with someone who's like, well, everyone's a coach, and just dismisses that and doesn't really see the value in that big coach energy? Like, because there's a very real tangible difference with the coaches that come out of QCA. Like, I'm not plugging QCA here. Yeah, I have no affiliate code yet. There might be one in the—

you should definitely know you want—

there might be one in the show notes by the end of this. But I honestly see the work that you're doing, and I see the shifts that your coaches have internally, which I think is my non-negotiable for coaching. I'm always like, when I ask a coach who's coaching with, and they're like, oh, I don't have a coach, that's a red flag for me. So how would you describe coaching at its essence and big coach energy to somebody who would say everyone's an effing coach?

Yeah, well, there's two parts to that. So to someone who's like, everyone's an effing coach, they're— the next line out of their mouth is probably like, well, I could give advice to somebody and make money and charge people for that.

Yeah.

And I would say to them, that's not coaching. Coaching is not advice giving. Coaching is not telling someone what to do. Coaching is not trying to fix someone's problems. Coaching is about helping someone really discover that the answer is within themselves. The client's always the expert at their life. And like, as coaches, we have the skill set and the tools to help our clients find the answers for themselves, which is way more powerful than trying to give somebody the answer. So that's one part of it. And then the other part of what I would describe as big coach energy is about humbly being the most confident coach in the room. It's like big dick energy, which is like, yeah, feeling And they got the biggest dick, hottest girl in the bar. Exactly. And like, big coach energy is when there's a million coaches, and there are so many coaches in this industry, and I still feel like we're at the start in a way. And at the same time, what separates the mediocre from the great are the ones that actually know how to facilitate transformation. And inherently, if you identify with wanting to become a coach and create transformation with people, on some level you have this natural ability to connect with people. You have this natural ability to bring things out of people or create a safe space for people, which is the foundation of it all. But people don't realize that there's so much more to be able to take people from where they are to where they want to go and go really, really deep with them. So that big coach energy is what naturally magnetizes success to you, because if you get on a discovery call with someone or you're in the DMs talking to them and you know without a shadow of a doubt that you can change their life, that energy is magnetic. Yeah, that energy is like, oh my gosh, I really feel like I could trust this person. I'm going to lean into this. And they're so confident in their ability to take me where I want to go. That is the energy that brings people to you.

I love that. I love that. My word for 2024 was magnetic. And being a projector, that invitation is so important. And you're right, the number one place that I created the most clients 2 years ago was on an airplane, because as soon as I sat down, like, yeah, being a therapist and a coach, I feel like energetically people were like, oh, you're gonna listen to me. And yeah, so I love that you shared that. We talked about therapy and we talked about coaching.

Yeah.

And mentorship. What's the difference between those 3?

Yeah, good question. And I just want to go back to one thing you just said, and you were like talking about how you were listening to people. And I feel like that is like such an underrated skill as a coach that we don't even realize. Listening is your superpower as a coach. That is transformational in and of itself for someone to be heard. Yeah. So I just want to like say that.

Yeah, absolutely. And something to just like expand on that is, you know, we do the Equine Retreats that you and I were talking about offline, and I use horse analogies all the time to help people expand their businesses and understand their relationship with their clients. And so what I'll I say is if your feet are moving more than your clients, you're losing. Yes. And that's because in a round pen, when you're exercising a horse, if you're chasing the horse, that's not clean energy. That's not safe. You have two legs, the horse has four. You're gonna get exhausted before the horse does.

Yeah. 100%.

And so I keep that in my mind when you talk about the importance of listening, because it's like if you are talking more than your clients, yeah, that energy should shift.

Totally. To me, that tells me that you are probably very ungrounded and unsure in your coaching, and so you're just trying to fill the space because the space is uncomfortable. The difference between therapy, coaching, and mentorship— so, and then there's friendship too, where the line can be blurry. So the simplest way for me to differentiate therapy and coaching is therapy brings people that are sometimes dysfunctional to functional and maintains your functionality. As— and then coaching takes people who are functional to the next level of their life. It takes them to a whole nother identity, takes them to a whole nother series of goals that they want to achieve. Like you said, it's more action-focused, inspired action. And then mentorship and consulting can kind of blend in that, okay, I've done this. I have mentored people in fertility stuff because I have been through so much IVF and all the things. And so other people that are going through that, I like to mentor them and say, this is my experience and hopefully my experience can help you.

Mm-hmm.

And mentorship's more about sharing your experience with someone and this is what I did and you can do this too kind of thing. Mm-hmm.

Yeah.

And consulting is having that bird's eye view of I've done this for this company and that for that company, and this is the strategy you can follow and here's another strategy you can follow. It's really. Giving people strategies, not necessarily from your own personal experience. And then of course, friendship's literally all of that in one. And honestly, people say to me in QCA and beyond, they're like, well, what if I do consulting and coaching? Or what if I do mentorship? I'm like, that's fine, you can literally wear all of those hats, but you should know the differences between them because you might say in a session It's so valuable because let's just say that you and I were working together one-on-one. Mm-hmm. And we're revamping something and we're working on energy, we're working on business stuff, whatever we're working on. Let's just say I just whip out a strategy and I'm like, this is what you should try. And it doesn't feel good to you. That's where the coaching comes in where I'm like, actually, what would feel good to you? Let's work on that. Instead of just telling someone what you think they should do.

Yeah. Ashley and I are on the same page energetically, which is why I totally interrupted her story in the 3D to be like, I know exactly what you're gonna say and I love this energy. And that's because you and I share something super uncommon in QCA and in Defy is I'm not gonna give you that effing DM strategy, 40 people, like cold DM them and your coaching business will grow. No, that's not coaching. That's prescription.

Yes.

You're fixing a symptom, which I think as a therapist is why it just, ah, it like you're solving a symptom. In coaching, it's like, well, what about the fear of being seen? What about the fear of success? What about the fear of failure? Um, so I give myself chills in that aspect, which is why I jumped in on your energy because coming from being a consultant, I feel like I move the needle on some of the bottom line metrics and the dashboard and the profit margins, but ultimately the metrics that I really wanted to move were internal.

Yeah.

And that's when I move more into coaching is because I'm not gonna give you a strategy to be able to grow yourself. And I just, I love that. So like rewind this. Yeah. Show me I'm a millennial without showing me I'm a millennial. Millennial. Rewind this and listen to this again because it's that part that I really, really hope that people hear you. About.

Yeah, yeah, I'm so glad that you said that. It's such an important point, and I have done— and everything has its place, right? Like, that consulting piece is really important, but the other part is also equally, if not more important. And I have been there where I have given people blanket strategies, and my coaching relationship with them, it didn't end well because they weren't happy because it didn't work. And I had to learn the hard way as a coach. And so, yeah. Yeah.

It's important. I wanna get into your million dollar launch. And before then, you've shared just a tiny bit of it with me on what shifted in you that shifted everything in your business. Wanna talk a little bit about coaching as a parent because my mastery of my coaching has helped me so much. I have a 13-year-old.

Yeah, I hate it.

Almost 8-year-old and then this tiny 11-month-old. Um, and working for 6 years as a therapist in child protective services, I feel like I was so much more patient and kind understanding, like other people's kids. And then you become a mom and it was difficult for me. I can only speak to my experience. Then now with coaching, my husband will sometimes call me out and be like, you're using your psychology on me, which I can't help.

But do that.

But I, I just also see everything so much slower for me as a mom with my tools as a coach. My specific question is like the balance, the yes and of being a mom and coaching, cuz I feel like we're always— I say this about sales, that we're always selling something. I'm selling bedtime, I'm selling eating your breakfast, I'm selling doing your homework. And what I tell my clients around selling is that if you're in alignment, you're never selling, you're serving. Like you said, oh, I know. So I have these gifts, why would I not share them with you? Um, and that's what I found with my daughters. You know, I, I'm obviously not coaching my 11-year-old yet, but I found with my daughters, like my one daughter Victoria, she's struggling in kind of coming into this middle child energy. And she very much didn't want to do her homework. And so like there was this element of like, you have to do your homework, you have to do your homework. And then I kind of backed off of that and got curious and was like, hey, could you tell me a little bit about why you want to do your homework? And I think that that's available to me because I'm a coach.

Yes.

Or I guess that's what I'm telling myself. And I'm asking you to validate my—

yes. And coaching as a parent is a fucking superpower. That's like the one thing that I was most excited about parenting. I am gonna mind fuck you in the best way. Like, you are gonna always remember who the fuck you are. I'm gonna teach you that you're a powerful creator from the second you're born. Like, you know, but then like real life hits and you're like, why are you throwing your food across the fucking floor? Like, I don't understand.

Like, you know, this is an entire Instagram reel now. Like, this is it.

I'm just like, wait a second, all my tools sometimes are working in my favor, and then like the next second I'm freaking out. It's a constant dance. I remember I used to teach yoga at a drug and alcohol rehab center, and these people were so hard to deal with sometimes. Like, they were just so disruptive. And like, I would finally get them into shavasana, and they'd finally be laying there, and I would do Reiki when they were But still. And then of course when everyone's quiet, some random person would be like, Miss Ashley, can I get some Reiki? Miss Ashley, can I do this? Miss— and I'm like, I'd be all zenned out and then I'd be like, why are you talking? I feel like that's my experience as a parent sometimes. Sometimes I'm just coaching it and I'm crushing it, and then other times I'm just losing my shit.

Yeah. Yeah, I, I laughed because you and I were just like, can we just see each other for a second? In the aspect that like 95%, maybe it's like 90% of the time for me, like I am, I'm in alignment. Yeah. And then there's literal times where I have this out-of-body experience where I'm watching this like human being in her skin suit walk up the stairs about to scream and I'm like, mm. We're not gonna do that, you know? And I think the more— the best thing that I've done as a parent is work on myself. And I think that entrepreneurship— Tracy Litt says this, she says like marriage, entrepreneurship, and parenting are the biggest lies, like the bait and switches, and it's the biggest personal development journey. And that's been very true for me. Oh, so speaking about the tools and also speaking about Tracy, she has a ton of tools. I know in QCA you talked about Reiki. Yeah, I want this to lead into our million-dollar conversation, is that you're teaching coaching but you've got the energetics. So I'm assuming you have some Reiki. I know you have hypnotherapy. I know you have, um, tapping and EMDR.

We don't have EMDR, we have, um, tapping and NLP.

Okay. Yeah, neuroling—

neurolinguistic programming. Yes.

I don't know why I couldn't say that this morning.

You're crushing it. We have Time Techniques. I'm gonna help you out. Time Techniques. We teach group coaching, how to facilitate in a group scenario, group setting. And we also have our signature method. It's all compiled into our method, but our method is the Quantum Coaching Method.

So, and okay, so your method though is what you've lived, Ash.

And so like 100%, but you've had this chrysalis melting down several times.

And I was with you last year when you had the latest one? I mean, you tell it that led up to this 7-figure launch.

I was in a really, it felt like a, an intense plateau. I'm sure people can relate to that, but I was having very similar launches and I felt like there was a glass ceiling that I just couldn't break. And I was so obsessed with how can I make this work and who can help me or who's my coach or just looking outside of myself for the answers of who would be an amazing affiliate partner and who would do this and who Who would do that? And just that constant seeking. And then at the first retreat that I went on for CEO Mama was in June, and we were in this very deep breathwork ceremony. Probably was the deepest one I've ever done, and I've done a ton of breathwork. And it, it took me by surprise, but it, it just took me super, super, super deep. And it was so clear. It was just the simplest answer of, you are the one you've been waiting for. Stop looking outside of yourself. You got this, you can do this. And it was just this knowing, it was a cellular level knowing. I mean, it sounds so simple saying it out loud, like you are the one you've been waiting for, like duh. The most spiritual truths, even when I'm, you know, on a mushroom ceremony journey, the simplest things are the most profound, you know? They're just the things that are so game-changing for me. So I took that, I'm the one I've been waiting for, and then I realized, what I needed to do to change up my funnel. And then I realized, okay, I need to create this webinar. And then I realized this, this, and that. And then I attracted Catherine to be an affiliate, and she agreed to come on board and affiliate for that launch. And it would just literally all fell into place after that breathwork ceremony, after I went in. And always, all the most profound shifts in my life have happened when I go in, like truly go deep, deep within myself. And figure out what somatically needs to shift. And I was just toning, and I was crying, and I was releasing, and it was so intense and all the things. And then after that, it was like reality shifted, you know, and things just completely changed. My nervous system wasn't ready for it. I was freaking the fuck out. I was like, wait a second, I'm gonna sign 100 students into this one cohort. This is gonna be a million-dollar launch. And my body didn't feel safe. It didn't feel fully, because what had you done up until then? We were doing between $250,000 to $350,000 in launches. $350,000.

Okay, so you're talking about like 25 to 30 students.

Yeah, yeah, that's—

that is massive. That's 30 times students.

Yeah, yeah, exactly. I know, so it was wild, and I was nervous about you know, how we were gonna hold that many people in Zoom and how the experience would be and would the experience still feel intimate and high level and high touch and, you know, just all the things that come with scaling to that level. 'Cause everyone wants a huge coaching business if this is what you're doing and, you know, you come into the space and you're like, I wanna be Bunny Young or I wanna be Ashley or I wanna be Catherine or I wanna be Natalie or I wanna be like Tony Robbins. But if you woke up the next day from zero to Tony Robbins, or zero to Bunny Young, or zero to me, whatever, you wouldn't be able to handle it. Your body would not be able to handle it. That year really showed me how important somatic work is physically, because my body is the container to hold all the things, all the people, all the wealth, like all of it. I have to expand my capacity through my physical body to hold it.

To be strong, you know. Yes. And, and you're like beyond your body too. And yeah, so I just want to thank you so much for sharing that because as we had talked offline that I just redid all the curriculum for Defy and we're going into February doing it. It is incredible. And like, we just— to follow the timeline of me getting the California house, which was such an expansion, having a boy, you know, like having our third child It makes sense for Defy to get that up level. And I know that this is going to be our biggest launch. And like, even as you're talking about Catherine affiliating, I'm like, well, because Defy, I have so many coaches because they learn how to do coaching and then they're like, now how do I do business?

Right?

I know this is going to be our biggest launch and there's still that, uh, can you hold? And so the power of you breathing through that and moving the energy, just thank you for sharing your experience and thank you for giving that into the QCA as well, because it took me so long as a therapist to learn how to do that. And I think that that's truly just such a gift. So I just want to thank you.

What I learned over the last year is creating neutrality within my body and within my energy. That's what allows me to access the safety. So when I think about having a million-dollar launch, before it was like It wasn't neutral in my system, you know what I mean? It was anything but. So it has to feel neutral. Like the first time I ever went into a Chanel store, I didn't feel like I belonged there, you know? But now I walk in, I'm like, this is my home, like whatever, you know what I mean? I can buy anything I want in here, but I don't have to, and it feels neutral, so I feel safe.

Because you're the one that can collaborate with Chanel, but you don't need it to go back full circle to what we were talking about. Of course Chanel is gonna vibrate at your frequency, but you're no longer trying to vibrate at Chanel's frequency.

Yeah, 100%.

I love that. So I, I wanna ask you first off, like stay tuned because I think that we'll probably figure out an affiliate thing between QCA and Defy. And we're about to just blow the F up of like the Defy, the Work-Life Alignment Challenge where it's already like, I love the name Defy so much.

It's so good. Well, it's still on brand right now for Wicked. Yeah.

But it, it's design. Yeah. I planned that.

Defying gravity, baby.

I know I planned that. Stay tuned on that because I can feel that expansion and Defy was design everything for your life. That's the D-E-F-Y of it is like a defy life. And so leading into that, like what is your yes and life? Like how do you define that?

Yes, and to me is pure expansion and possibilities all the time. Meaning this is not an or universe, this is an and universe. So if I'm debating whether I should buy this or that, I'm like, actually, I can have both. And I can have both. So for me, it's really giving myself permission to want what I want on every level and to remember I am fucking powerful. I am fucking powerful and everything is possible and available. And it's so important for me to go back to that in moments that I doubt myself, because I do doubt myself, you know?

Yeah.

So it helps me really combat the doubt. Yeah.

And I mean, of course you doubt yourself because without the doubt we wouldn't have anything to realize the rise against. Yeah.

That's true.

Right? We're gonna have those experiences. Like without night, we wouldn't recognize day.

It's true.

I love that. Um, and I also love just to make this like a little bit more of our organic natural cycle. When you said that you plateaued, like that's winter. Yeah. That's everything dying. That's everything slowing down. And that is, in having 16 companies over the last 19 years, that seasonality is completely normal. So thank you. Yes.

And I was still proud of what we were creating. Yes. And I knew there was more.

Yes. Okay. So speaking of more, people are definitely gonna want to follow you, and I know there's so many coaches that listen to this podcast. So how do they follow you? How do they find out more about QCA other than in the show notes? What's the best connection here?

Okay. So I would love to invite you all to a free masterclass to help you really understand how you can uplevel your coaching. So in this masterclass, you will literally be able to gain real tangible amazing tools to help you become the next level coach, tap into your big coach energy even more. That's number one. Number two, I'm on Instagram at thequantum.coach, always hanging out there, always giving tips and all the things about coaching. And the website is just thequantum.coach. So it's thequantum.coach everywhere— Instagram, website, all the things.

Love that. So first and foremost, I just want to thank you so much for being here, Ash, like, and we're jamming on all things business and personal and life and your expansion.

You too. Thank you so much. I just adore you, and I can't wait to hug you so soon.

All right, well, thank you for listening. Thank you for being here. Thank you for joining us on the Yes And podcast wherever you were listening to us. I do want to have an ask. I have an ask for you guys, for you to leave a review. Let us know how you found this episode. Subscribe, like, and then also I would love it if you could go on to Instagram and Tag Ashley and I in your takeaway.