Dr. Aziz teaches a two-word confidence fix: say "It's okay" to yourself after a mistake or setback. He shows how this simple phrase shifts you from self-criticism to self-compassion, using his son's experience as an example of how it builds resilience.
Today I want to share two simple words that you can use to create an instant shift in your confidence. When you use these words, you can shift from stressed, anxious, self critical, full of doubt to way more confident, way more relaxed, and way more on your own side. Stay tuned to find out what those are. Welcome to the Art of Extraordinary Confidence. I'm your host, Dr. Aziz, and this is the show for you if you want to 10x your confidence in every area of your life that matters, whether it's your dating life, your social life, your work and business and career, your finances, every area that's important, Confidence is the doorway to success in that area. And today we're going to look at something that you can use across the board in every area of your life. And it's two simple words that can help shift you from a stressed or anxious or tense state to feeling way more confident. Because here's the thing. Self compassion, being on your own side, not turning and attacking yourself is the biggest piece of confidence, hands down. It's the biggest skill. I call it the master skill. Because here's the thing, you get the job, you get the girl, you win, you naturally feel good about yourself, right? You're like, haha, I'm the man now. What happens when life doesn't deal you the winning hand? Let's say you don't get the job, you don't get the girl, you get ignored, you get rejected, someone doesn't like you, someone fires you, someone, whatever, you don't get invited. And then what happens? We feel frustrated, we feel down, we feel critical, we turn on ourselves. Ah, I'm an idiot. I suck. What's wrong with me? Right? And that is the biggest drain on our confidence. And in fact, if you can win, you can eliminate that and you stop attacking yourself. No matter what happens. You can be amazed at how you have unconditional confidence. You have confidence that remains high no matter what the ups and downs of your life are. So here are two words that can help you get back into that state of solid, unchanging confidence in yourself. And I learned them from my son Zaim, who's almost three right now. And confession, it's actually three words, but two of them are smushed together. So it's three, two words. I don't know, you be the judge of it. But here are the words. Let me tell you this story real quick. So a while back, he's a little kid and he's trying to figure out how to do stuff and he wants to do stuff more for himself. That's part of his drive for autonomy. That's healthy. So we let him. He wants to get the raisins out of the jar. He wants to pour the cereal. He wants to open up the container of liquid and pour it. And so you kind of help him because you don't want him throwing the cereal and throwing the milk everywhere, but you also want to give him some sense of his own autonomy. So. So we're doing that, and I think at one time, he grabs the hemp milk or whatever and just goes. And just, like, spills it all over the counter. And, you know, me being the dad that I want to be, when that happens inside of me, I go, what the fuck? I gotta clean that shit up. Outside of me, I say, it's okay, buddy. Because I could tell he poured it, and he's like, you know, I'm like, it's okay. It's okay. It's just, have milk. Then we clean it up, right? Me being an awesome dad. Well, flash forward, you know, a month later, and he spills something else. I turn around, he's got the protein powder all over the counter. And my reaction is silence, because, you know, anger comes up in me. I don't want to yell at him, so I'm just like. And he goes, it's okay. It's okay. And that just melted my heart, makes me want to cry. I'm just like. And then it just totally shifted my state, and I'm like, yeah, yeah, it is okay. It's not a big deal. It's just some powder. Let's clean it up. Those are the two words that can shift everything. It's okay. It's okay. I didn't get the job. It's okay. I told myself I was going to go, you know, approach those people or go to that conversation and be bold or give a better presentation. I told myself I was going to overcome my fear and approach that woman and. And ask her out, and I didn't. And in that moment, that's when you want to turn on yourself. You want. Demon comes out, bounces out of the shadows. And in that moment, guess what you want to say, it's okay, and throw your name in there. Aziz, it's okay. It's okay, buddy. You know, I throw that little phrase in there, buddy, too, because that's a term of endearment. And when you refer to yourself by name and use loving words or terms of endearment, it can completely shift your state, completely change your psychology, make you way more on your own side, way more compassionate. Which makes you way more confident, increases your risk tolerance, and makes you a much better performer in all areas work, business, and even socially. So those are the two key words. It's okay. Use them. Try it out in your life and share below. What are you noticing? Do you use this in your life? What have you found? What gets in the way? Let's all help support each other out. And as always, if you want to find out more and get more of these videos as they come out, subscribe and I look forward to seeing you in future videos. Until we speak again. May have the courage to be who you are and to know on a deep level that you're awesome. Talk to you soon.
