Change These 3 Patterns To Become More Confident Now

There are three patterns that you're going to want to change now that you can change right now that will radically increase your confidence. Would you like to know what they are? I'm going to share them with you right now so you're in the right place. If you're enjoying this, click down below to subscribe and hit the little notification bell so you get all the videos as they come out. Because the more you study this, the more you apply this, the more confident you'll become. And confidence is the key to success in all areas of life. External success, which is great, but even more importantly is internal success. Because you want to feel good, feel confident, feel, feel accomplished, feel fulfilled as you're succeeding externally. Because if you succeed externally, but inside you don't feel like you're enough, you're still not good enough. No matter how much you earn, no matter how many people love you, that's not success. Right? So let's get inner confidence handled as we also succeed out there. And there's three patterns that are affecting your confidence that you must shift. And this is absolutely essential to understand because most of us think that confidence is locked in place. The way I feel about myself is because that's how I am, that's what I deserve, that's how it is. And, and actually it's a moment to moment pattern that you're doing. Even things like I have social anxiety or I'm a shy person. These are actually patterns that you've run so many times that you think that's who you are, that's your identity, but it's not who you are. And you can shift those things very quickly. And that's what I do with my clients all the time. So let me share how to do that with you right now. There's one client that I work with, his name, we'll call him Gerald. And Gerald demonstrated all of these patterns. He said, look, Aziz, I'd love to be able to walk into a group of people and just start a conversation, but I can't. I've never been able to do that. And I'm like, why not? He's like, well, I've always been shy and I have a lot of social anxiety. I've dealt with social anxiety for years and so I just can't walk in there. And then people tell me I should just walk into the group and do it and they give me some tips and then they never work. So what's going on there is he feels inhibited, he feels stuck, he feels like this is just how it Is, this is who I am. And when people just tell me to do otherwise, it's angering to me. They don't get me. It's frustrating. If it was just so easy, then I would do it. So he's feeling maybe a little inadequate too, Right? Like, if I could just do it, I'd be enough, but I can't. So then we get locked into all this. Our identity, defending our identity, being upset at other people, feeling limited. Let's release all of that. So I'm gonna share these three patterns with you right now. Are you excited? Okay, first things first. Before I do, you gotta shake out your body a little bit. I know it's weird, but do it, because here's the thing. Rigidity in your body is rigidity up here. And then when I share something with you, you're gonna be like, no. Doesn't work. So at my live events, when I'm working with people, or even in my Mastermind program, when I'm working remotely and zoom and stuff, like, we're always. I'm getting people to move up and shake their body around all the time. Even just a little thing, a little shimmy. Come on, just give me a little shimmy. Okay, you can still do it sitting. Just be, like, in your chair. Little shimmy. Looks like one of those Egyptian dances. I don't think Egyptians actually dance like that. Right. That was just. Anyway, okay, three patterns. The first thing you got to shift is a pattern of where you focus. Now, focus is a big topic. I could talk about that for hours. But the specific one I'm talking about right here is your focus is on you or them. That's the first pattern you gotta shift. So when I asked Gerald. Okay, okay, so you're nervous. What's one thing you're nervous to do? And he's like, well, walk into a group and start a conversation with people. And Gerald was actually merriled. Gerald was merriled. Gerald was married to Merrill. No, Gerald was married at the time. And so for him, he didn't want to use this for dating and stuff, but he did want to. He'd go to these networking conferences and stuff for his business, and he'd feel anxious or uncomfortable just walking into a group and starting conversations. So if he could do this, it would improve his networking, improve his business, improve his career, as well as his social life, too. And he's like, it's so uncomfortable. I can't just walk into a group and start a conversation. I said, okay, walk me through this. So there you are. You're in this room, there's all these people around, and there's this group of maybe say, two people talking, and you're drawn to go join in. He's like, okay. I'm like, okay, you're right there. You see them. You want to join in. Like, help me get into Gerald right now. What's happening? What are you focusing on? And he's like, well, I'm feeling tight in my chest, and I'm wondering, like, what am I going to say? And I don't know what to say to join in. And I don't know if what I'm going to say is going to be good enough. They're going to think that I'm interrupting them. I said, okay, all right. I'm just going to replay back what I heard there. I'm feeling anxious in my chest. I'm not sure what to say. I don't know if what I say is going to be good enough. And I kind of. There's more that he said, but I followed every single, single thing. I said, who is your focus on right now? And he said, on me. And I said, I know. And when our focus is on ourselves, we're. We struggle in life and socially. So what's happening is he's not saying, I wonder what they're talking about. I wonder who those people are. I wonder what businesses they're in. I wonder how they're feeling right now. I wonder if they're enjoying their conversation with each other. Maybe not. Maybe both of them are like, I hope someone comes in and breaks this up. This is so boring. But I'm too nice to leave, right? I wonder what might come from our conversation. I wonder if there's a way that I could benefit them. I wonder what they need, right? Like, the focus is out on someone else. And so I guided them through some of those questions. Like, okay, imagine you're standing there. There's those people over there. You want to start a conversation. You want to ask them a question, and you want to say, I wonder what they need in their businesses. I wonder what brought them to this conference. Like, really take a moment to imagine those people and think about what brought them to the conference. I was like, are you imagining that? He's like, yeah. I'm like, how do you feel? He's like, curious. I'm like, do you feel anxious? And he said, no. I said, exactly. So focus on you focus on self. Study this in your life. You get bound up in dating. You get bound up in conversations, social stuff, career stuff, any kind of interaction you're getting bound up in, I guarantee you, your focus is getting more and more and more internal, internal, internal focus on the other person. So that's the first shift. Focus from self to focus on others focus. The second shift, the second pattern that you need to change is the pattern of act versus halt, act versus halt. So when we have many years of social anxiety built up or shyness or other labels that we put on ourselves, then there's a situation, and we've trained ourselves through repetition to halt instead of act. So those are the people to walk over and talk to. Halt, raise my hand, ask that question in the group. Halt. Make that call. Halt. Go ask that person out. Halt. Right? And that's all it is. It's just a pattern. It's a pattern that you've done. It's not who you are. It's not written in your DNA. There's nothing in there that is limiting you to do that. Now you might say, no, no, no, I was born this way. I don't know about that. I mean, because there are people who've been born all kinds of ways that didn't limit them their entire lives. And how much of this was conditioned into you? And a lot of it, we don't even know what was conditioned into us. So what I like to do with clients is say, well, let's just run an experiment. Would you be open to an experiment for a week or two? Now, most people, especially if they're investing in their coaching, will say, okay, they're not going to be like, all right, here, I'm taking my time, my money, my energy to do coaching. I'm like, you want to do an experiment? Hell, no, I don't want to do an experiment. No. They're ready. So hopefully you watching here, you're ready. You want to do an experiment for a week or two? Okay. The experiment is, what if you trained yourself to act and you found one thing a day where you noticed the impulse to halt and you acted. And it doesn't have to be the scariest thing, but a small thing. One thing I love to do is a cold shower every day. I still do. I've been doing it for months, every single day, because there's that internal urge to halt and then you act. That's a very simple one. You could do that anytime. You could do that every single day. But you can also find other opportunities. There's that email, Halt, do it. There's that thing you want to share, that impulse to say something, to ask something. Halt, act, halt. Act, just train just once a day. That's the experiment. You don't have to do 17 times because the changing of the pattern doesn't have to be really dramatic all at once in one day. Just slight course. Correct. Because then you'll start to see, wait a minute. This is a pattern I have control over. Okay, the third thing, third pattern of shift is express versus inhibit. Now this is a form of acting versus halting, but it's even more specific, express versus inhibit. So if you're running a pattern of inhibition, that means you are tightening up your. How you express, you're tightening up your energy, your voice tone, your body language, your eyes, your face, your emotion, everything is being ratcheted back, bringing it back in, bringing it back in to, to keep everything muted. Hello. I'm going to act in my Persona now. So you don't judge me. Right? It's gonna be some muting of you, some altering of you. And so what you want to do as part of this experiment could be to turn the dial up just 5%. Just 5%. 5% more expressiveness. What would that look like? Would you move your hands a little more? Would you make a few more jokes? Would your eyes light up? Would you show some excitement or enthusiasm about something? Again, you don't have to change everything radically overnight. Just 5% for a couple of weeks. You down for that? Okay, so those are the experiments. If you run those, it will transform your social confidence, it will transform your life. If you want a lot more guidance around this, I highly recommend checking my programs inside of Confidence University. That's the most powerful online confidence training there is to learn this stuff, internalize this stuff, get this stuff. We give you exercise after exercise, exact little tweaks to make those little 5% shifts that add up to, to a radically new you at the end of that year. So check out Confidence University to join that and share below. What are you learning? What are you finding most valuable? Until we speak again, may have the courage to be who you are and to know on a deep level that you're awesome.