Complete Self Confidence: Fight The Lies! | Dr. Aziz - Confidence Coach

Do you doubt yourself? Do you say critical or negative things or hear them in your own mind that tell you that you're not doing it, that you're not capable, that you just can't, that you don't measure up? If so, we got to get in there and we gotta pull out the lies, suck out the poison, and return you to your natural state of boldness, confidence, belief in yourself, and love for yourself. And that's what we're going to do in this episode. Welcome to another episode of the Art of Extraordinary Confidence. I'm your host, Dr. Aziz, and we're going to talk about confidence and you. And of course, we do that in all areas of your life. Your dating relationship, your career, your physical confidence, everything. But this episode is about getting rid of the lies, which is going to create complete. And the way that we're going to do that is by finding some of the worst offenders. And what I mean by the lies are at different times in your life, starting from as early as you can remember and probably even before you can remember, you have had moments where someone told you something that was not true, something that was a lie, something that was false, and you believed it. Now, I'm not talking about someone telling you about the tooth fairy or Santa Claus. I'm talking about something way more negatively impactful. Someone told you something about who you were and what you were capable of and what your worth was or was not. And whether you were attractive or not, whether you were smart or dumb. That person might have been one of your parents. And sometimes people, you know, we got the. Some of you got the lottery where you got a parent who was just shitty, you know, a lot of the time. And they were either alcohol or drug using or abusive in some way, either physically or verbally or emotionally. And so they just, they told you straight up, you'll never amount to anything. You're a failure, you're stupid. What's wrong with you? And if that was your experience, even more important to fight that. And maybe in some ways you can really see how fucked up and distorted their perspective was. So it's like, wow, I'm going to believe that. That's what I'm going to take as factual information. But sometimes it's not so extreme. It's a little more subtle. Sometimes the parent doesn't say, you're stupid. You never amount to anything. They just, you know, criticize you a lot. If you don't get an A, better be smart, you better achieve. They put a lot of pressure on you to be athletic like your brother or your sister, which the message there is, don't be weak, don't be interested in art, don't be interested in music. Be better at sports, be stronger, be whatever. So however it was transmitted, with ill intentions or good intentions because they were obviously angry or because it was for your own good. We want to find some of those lies. And maybe you didn't get it not just from parents. Maybe you got it from other kids at school. Maybe everyone at school made fun of you when you were a kid for something. Your ears look stupid, you're too fat, and everyone you know, a bunch of kids made fun of you for it. As I'm saying this, it's gonna be triggering memories, and you're gonna come up with some. Some of the lies. And some part of us is like, oh, no, no, I don't want to go there. I don't want. I don't want to pay attention to that. But guess what? If you run from it, it runs you. It runs your life. It creates patterns of fear and avoidance. You don't want to be close to people. You don't want to reveal yourself. You don't want to share yourself. You don't think you're attractive. You can't get into relationships. You can't create the job and the career that you want because you're not worth it. You're not smart enough. It runs you. It dominates your life. And so we need to face this. We need to find the lies. And as they say, and I believe it's bananas, the Woody Allen movie, You got to suck out the poison. Suck out the poison. And that's what it is. It's just. It's bullshit. So take one lie right now. One lie. Can you think of the one for me? One that's like, up for me recently is I was told from a very young age, 15, that my body was permanently damaged and that I would never be fit and strong in my body. There was something wrong with my body physically. And that would be the way for the rest of my life. And I believed that lie for 19 years. Believed it. And, man, that'll fuck you up. Maybe for you, it's that you're not attractive or that you're not worth anything or that you're not smart. So find that one lie. And then let's just take a look at that. And here's the thing. Maybe you're in an abusive situation where someone's telling you that right now on a daily basis. And if so, that's going to be something to look at, because how are you going to build your confidence if someone is there berating you all the time? But for most of us, that's not happening now. That was happening way back then. And you are the one who's perpetuating that lie. You are the one who's repeating it many times a day, pressing play on that play button. Let's hear that one again. Ooh, it's like a song that you just can't get enough of. Oh, yeah, there it is. You'll never amount to anything. Yeah, I love that tune. Right, so let's stop that right now. What's the opposite of that? What is the exact opposite of this lie, whatever lie that you've been telling yourself? That you're attractive, that you are worthy of love, that you're smart instead of dumb, that in my case, my body is extremely healthy and physically capable of anything. That I'm an athlete, that I'm a warrior, that I'm. What is the opposite of your lie? Say it now to yourself. Think it now to yourself. Write it down. Bring it into your consciousness as possible and affirm that and look for the truth of that. And when the voice comes back in and says, no, no, no, no, no, no, we have evidence for this bullshit old story. We have this evidence and that evidence. And so and so said that. And so and so said that. Look, it's just what people said. It's not true. And take a step back and say, okay, do I want to live my life by that. That old thing that's been keeping me stuck, or do I want to be open to something new? And you can make that decision right now, in this very second that you're watching this video right here with me, and you can decide. I'm going to believe in that. And guess what? Tomorrow your mind might go back to that. Forget tomorrow. How about in 20 seconds your mind might go back to that and you say, I'm not going to affirm that. That's not true. I don't believe you. The truth is I am healthy. The truth is I am smart. The truth is I am worthy of love. And then here's the real kicker. You don't just say that and then sit back. Because if you say that, guess what's going to happen? You're going to do this ping pong thing where it's like, I am. No, you're not. I am. No, you're not. You know that little dance? So here's how you break free of that dance. I don't believe you. I am blank, right? Whatever it is for you, I am attractive. I am capable. I am intelligent. I am physically healthy and strong. And then what do you do? You take what immediate action that affirms that, that builds that I am attractive. If I knew that was true, what would I do? I would go talk to that person. I'd share my ideas. I wouldn't hold back. I'm physically healthy. What would I do? I'd go for a run. I'd go work out. I'd go do something to show that, to build that reality. So that's what you're going to do? I don't believe you. The new truth. Go take action. You repeat that enough over a course of days or months and your entire world will transform. So share below in the comments what you're learning, what your old bullshit story was, and what your new truth is. Share it below. I want to read it. I want to support you on your journey. And until we speak again, may you have the courage to be who you are and to know on a deep level that you're awesome.