Dr. Aziz explains how to build confidence by acting on small impulses faster. The smaller the gap between noticing an impulse and doing it, the more confident you become. He uses examples like rejoining a gym and asking someone out to show how quick action creates momentum.
Do you want more confidence? Faster? I mean, who doesn't? Isn't that what our modern society is all based on? It's getting stuff and getting it faster? I don't want to wait two days for my package to arrive to my doorstep. I want it at my house. I want it there in 30 minutes, delivered by a robot drone, and I want it now. So I'm right there with you, though, if you want more confidence, you want it faster. I want to share a simple technique that's going to help you radically increase your progress in freeing yourself of social anxiety and becoming more bold and more confident in your life. Sound good? Okay, here's what it is. It is your impulse to action quotient or number. Impulse to action. And here's what I mean by that. You are constantly having little impulses that move through your system, that move through your awareness. And these can come up when you're alone, These can come up around other people. These can come up anywhere. And the impulses come in a variety of ways. It might be an image, it might be an urge, it might be an idea that. A sound that pops through your mind or a word that go through your mind. So you're talking to somebody and you want to ask them a question. There's an impulse to ask them something. There's an impulse to interrupt them, to ask them something. There's an impulse to do something or an impulse to. Maybe you're on a date. An impulse to reach out or touch or take an action or put yourself out there or say something more provocative or edgy. There's an impulse to be more real with someone and share what you're feeling. There's an image that comes to you that it's about an action to take, right? These are all the impulses. Then there's when you convert that impulse into action. And if you do, first of all. So if you don't convert into action, then your quotient is bad, zero. But if you do, it's like, how many of those impulses do you convert into action and how fast? Now, what kind of impulses am I talking about? You know, you got an impulse to, you know, eat a ham sandwich, convert that into action. Is that going to give you confidence? Not in any clear way that I can see. I don't think ham sandwiches are the secret to confidence. But how about an impulse to speak up? How about any impulse that is driving you forward in any way? So it could be a social context. That one's more obvious, right? You have the impulse to Share your idea. Share your idea. You have an impulse to make that joke. Make the joke. But it could be other things too. Like, you have an impulse to take action on a certain project. Go take action on that project. Because confidence builds in all kinds of ways. So if you're making more advance or more progress or more action at work, you might start to feel more confident in general in how you carry yourself. This is a quick example from my own life. So I've been really obsessed with running and hiking for quite a while, and pendulum swung so far over. I used to go to the gym and stuff, and I stopped going to the gym because I had to wear a mask in there. I was like, why do I have to work out with a mask? This is terrible. And. And I just kind of felt confined. And I love being outside every free moment. I just love being outside. And so I did that. But it's getting into. The weather was changing, and I was like, you know what? I want to shift things. And I just. I had this image. I was going to bed one night, and I just saw myself in the gym. It was different because I had. You know, my schedule was designed to have me have outdoor time and hiking and running and stuff. I had no time in my schedule for the gym. And I was like, okay, just like, that image or impulse to action. The very next day, I went to the gym. And it's a gym I've been to in the past. And they're like, what do you want to do? You want to sign up for a monthly or for the year, and you get this massive discount and you sign up for the year? And I was like, wait a minute. I know how that works. You know, let me make sure that I'm actually gonna use it. I didn't trust that impulse, right? Like, what if I just go for a month and then I stop? And I was like, no, let's just be reasonable. Let's go with the monthly. And they're like, well, right now there's a super special going on, and you get 14 months instead of 12. And I was like, sold. Let's go for the year. And the guy was, like, kind of amused at my. Like, at me, I guess. I was like, sold. Let's do it. And he's like, okay, and I signed up for the year. Now you might say, hey, Aziz, that was not just following an impulse. That was impulsive, and that was bad. Well, maybe you could say, well, how do you know you're gonna follow it up for the year? And I was like, well. Cause I can choose. Like, this is where I'm gonna put my energy, Right? So it's the same thing. It's like, how do you know that speaking up is gonna be the right thing to do? And how do you know if asking that person out is. I don't know. But it's like you decisively take action based upon those impulses, assuming the impulses for something healthy, like going to the gym. If it's like your impulse is to, like, you know, shotgun six beers, maybe that's an impulse to let go by the ham sandwich. I don't know. I'm a little on the fence with that one. I think you could probably make a better, better choice for your health, but that's up to you now. So pay attention to the impulses. Convert them into action as quick as possible. You want to radically accelerate your confidence growth. Impulse to action. Impulse to action. Impulse to action. Interestingly enough, when you're in the flow of a fantastic conversation, you ever had that experience? It's just flowing. You know what to say next. You're having a great experience. You're not even thinking about the next thing you're going to say. It just comes to you. What's happening is there's no pa. There's no gap between your impulse and your action. You're not even thinking about it. You're just being and doing life. You're being done. You're being expressed in that moment. And that's the state that if you can get into that, not only do you feel just free and confident, but stuff happens fast in your life. So share down in the comments below what you're learning. Hope this serves you until we speak again. May have the courage to be who you are and to know on a deep level that you're awesome.
