Dr. Aziz offers brief, practical advice for ending conversations gracefully and without guilt. He contrasts adult over-politeness with his five-year-old son’s blunt exits and recommends using a short phrase (e.g., “Hey, it’s been great talking with you — I’m gonna go”) to give yourself permission to end interactions. He briefly promotes his program Confidence University (course: Social Mastery) and invites viewers to share experiences in the comments.
Have you ever been trapped in a conversation where they just kept talking and you didn't want to be talking and you wanted to get out of it, but you stayed in it? How long did you stay in it? An extra 2 minutes? 5 minutes? A year maybe? You got into a relationship with a person and you really wanted to leave from the beginning. Like, I'm exaggerating there, but we can feel this obligation and this difficulty around ending conversations or saying goodbye or completing a hangout, whatever, and it really detracts from our experience. It makes us not want to hang out with that person again. Or you just leave a social interaction feeling drained. You know, there's so many clients that I work with who think I'm introverted or there's some reason why I just don't like to connect with people that much. And the truth is, actually, they would enjoy connecting with people more. They're just so restrained. They're. They're playing by so many rules. And one rule that I want to free you of today in this video is the rule that you gotta do this really drawn out goodbye and wait for the other person to be done. And one of my best teachers for this is actually my son. He's five years old and he's figured out how to FaceTime me from my wife's phone. So just before this video, we're sitting in the park getting a little lunch and I get this FaceTime video. And it's from her. I know it's really from him. So I open it up and there he is. And he's like, hi, Daddy, what are you doing? When are you gonna be home? Blah, blah, blah. And we chat for like two minutes. Then he's like, okay, bye. And even before I could say, bye, I love you, he's already hung up and he's just totally free. He's done having the conversation and now it's over. And while you might use a little more social grace as an adult, you might say, oh, hey, it's been great talking with you. I'll catch you in a little bit, or I'll see you later. You don't need much more than that. You can take that exact same energy of like, am I done here? Like, checking in with yourself? Am I done? I am done. Hey, it's been great talking with you. Or, hey, nice talking with you. I'm gonna go over here. Or, well, listen, I need to go check on this other person. I'll see you in a little bit. So something really short, really simple, one phrase, and then you have complete and total permission. Shut up. We're trying to record you have complete and total permission to end the conversation and you'll be amazed at how much little tweaks like that can totally free you up. In fact, if you want to learn a lot more about this, I don't know if you've heard of my program Confidence University, but you can find out all about that on my website socialconfidencecenter.com or you can go to theconfidenceuniversity.com find out about it directly. But inside of Confidence University we have an entire course on Social Mastery which is going to ultimately give you that sense of permission and freedom to be who you are across all conversations and learn how to connect with people easily and freely as yourself. So share below when you're using this technique and how it goes for you and what you're learning. I love reading those comments. Until we speak again, may you have the courage to be who you are and to know on a deep level that you're awesome.
