A short YouTube confidence-tip video (Jan 15, 2018) by Dr. Aziz urging viewers to stop ghosting and instead confront endings directly. He illustrates the point with a personal anecdote about quitting a Muay Thai/Jiu Jitsu gym despite a one-year contract and paying a small fee to cancel, then encourages listeners to have difficult conversations to build confidence and integrity.
Hey, what's up? Dr. Aziz here, and this is a quick two minute confidence tip for you to give you the courage to stop ghosting in any area of your life. This comes up a lot in dating and relationships, but this can happen in anything. And in case you're not familiar with it, ghosting is when you don't send a clear message of goodbye, I'm done, I'm out, anything like that, you just stop showing up and you just kind of, kind of fade away, and they reach out to you and you hide and you don't respond. That's ghosting. Now, I was just talking with a guy in the gym. I just finished my workout this morning, and he was in a dating situation about maybe three or four months ago in the summertime, maybe it was longer now, Geez. Maybe six months ago in the summertime. We both joined this gym in Portland. Like a fighting gym. Separately. We were talking in the gym, like, oh, you joined it last month too? Oh, cool. He wanted to learn Jiu Jitsu. I wanted to learn Mai Thai, Muay. Muay Thai, I should say. Muay Thai is a drink. Muay Thai. And I went for a month and then I quit. Now, the reason I quit is because, I don't know, I was getting beat up. My. I was just getting. It felt sore in weird places. And I was like, man, I don't. It's not worth it to me to risk injury because I'd rather go to the gym and run and do other stuff like that. So I was like, I'm out. But I signed a one year contract when I joined, and so I had the thought, like, oh, maybe I'll just not show up anymore. But I didn't want to pay for it. I actually could have ghosted because I changed my credit card since joining to when I was leaving, so they could have never got after me. But I was like, you know what, man? Step up. And that's the recommendation I have for you if you're thinking about ghosting. If you want to ghost, I would say step up, confront the issue and solve the problem. Problem. You'll be better off for it. So I was talking to this guy in the gym and he wants to. He's like, you just quit and you got some money. You know, how much did you have to pay to get out of the agreement? And I was like, I don't know. I mean, I paid like 180 bucks and I got out of the whole year. He's like, whoa, that's it. I'm like, yeah, and he's like, wow. So I don't know how much he's paying in dues every month, but it's gonna add up to a lot more than 180. I'm like, dude, you should just talk to the guy. He's like, yeah, my reasons aren't good enough. He's gonna, like, tell me I suck. I'm like, whatever, man. Confront the issue and solve the problem. Just have the conversation with the dude, deal with any questions he asks you, any shame you feel. Step up, confront the issue, and solve the problem. Just tell the person, no, thank you. This doesn't feel like a good fit for me. I'm done. I'm out. I just don't want to do this anymore. You don't have to have a million and one reasons. In fact, don't share a million and one reasons that comes across as like, oh, here's why we're not a good fit for dating. I have to convince you. You. Here's reason number one. Here's reason number two. Here's, you know. And then you guys are arguing over whether those are legit reasons. Fuck that. Just say, look, this doesn't feel right for me, and I'm done in whatever area that is. So confront the issue, solve the problem now. I don't know if he's gonna do it. He said he would. We'll see. I did. It was a little uncomfortable. And then I'm out. Right, so what are you gonna confront and solve right now? What, are you gonna let that loose end of ghosting that's just kinda hanging over you? Like, you think it's the easy way out? No, it's the coward's way out. You're not confronting the issue. And so you don't build the confidence, you don't build the trust in yourself. And now the next time you want to end something, guess what? You're weaker. You don't know how to do it strongly. So that's my tip for today. Strong endings. Confront the issue, solve the problem. I'll talk to you soon. Till we speak again. May have the courage to be who you are and to know on a deep level that you're awesome. By the way, subscribe down below. You can hit the little bell for notifications so you can see the videos because I'm gonna be doing a lot more videos this year. I'm feeling pumped in 2018 to make 2018 the most confident year for me and for you, for all of us. So subscribe, stay tuned, and I'll talk to you soon.
