A short YouTube talk by Dr. Aziz explaining why people over-invest in others' feelings. He argues the behavior stems not from moral kindness but from a sense of personal insecurity and safety—if others are upset, the speaker feels unsafe—so caring becomes a form of self-protection. The video aims to help viewers recognize this dynamic and shift toward authenticity.
If you're constantly worrying about what other people feel, what they think, trying to take care of others, you have to watch this video to the end, because here's the biggest reason why you're doing it. It might seem like it's about being a good person. I'm really a kind person. I care about people everywhere. I'm not saying you're not kind. You don't care. But that's not what the source of this pattern is. Because the real reason that I'm constantly worried about how everyone's feeling is because if you're upset with me, if she doesn't feel okay, if he's not included, then I'm not okay. I'm not safe. And now I have to control what he's feeling, what she's thinking, what's going on over there so that I safe? Is that really about being a caring, good person? Is that really even about other people? Or is that about me and my own safety? And when you really see this and shift it, it frees you up to stop trying to be what you're supposed to be and allows you to be who you really are.
