A short YouTube monologue by Dr. Aziz offering practical, psychological guidance for handling feelings of exclusion. He distinguishes between chronic feelings and actual exclusion, recommends an internal affirmation of belonging, advises against over-trying to force inclusion, and encourages seeking other, more welcoming social circles.
Here is the secret to dealing with feeling left out. First, you have to be able to assess, am I really being left out, or is this just this chronic feeling? So maybe you're in a conversation with three or four people and they just start chatting amongst each other for a moment, and you're like, oh, nobody likes me. You know, you got to be able to become aware of that old pattern and start with this deep foundational affirmation, I belong everywhere I go. And isn't that true? Maybe there's a couple people and they're like, we don't want to be your friend, but I belong where I am. They might not be open to connection, but I belong everywhere I go. So first, create that deep foundation of belonging in yourself. And then if you're getting excluded, you don't really have to try that hard. The more you try, like, oh, include me, include me, the worse it gets. It does feel like they're kind of excluding you. Say, hey, I'll let you guys have this conversation. I don't need to be friends with these people. I'm just here to get the job done. But if it's a social thing, move on. Don't try to be included with people that aren't trying to include you. How exhausting. There's going to be millions of people that will lovingly include you. Go find them.
