How To Feel Attractive And Worthy No Matter What

Do you want to feel more confident and more loved, like people like you more? You trust that people like you. You just have the assumption that people are going to like you. And you generally feel like an incredibly likable and lovable person. If you don't feel that way right now, or if you want to feel more of that way, watch this episod. Welcome to the Art of Extraordinary Confidence. I'm your host, Dr. Aziz, and this is the show for you to 10x your confidence in every single way, every which way possible core confidence transformation that's going to help you just crush it in life. If you're enjoying these episodes, click below to subscribe. And by all means share it with folks, because today we're going to get into something that is super powerful because we all want more love, right? I mean, who doesn't? And at the same time, though, I found that we have. It's like a spigot, like on the side of a house, it turns on a hose. And there is something that most of us do that turns the hose off. And in this metaphor, the hose is love, right? It's flowing, there's a huge amount of love that we could feel, but then we turn off the hose and then we don't feel love for ourselves. We don't like ourselves, we don't love ourselves, we don't think other people are going to love us. And here is the spigot turning thing that I've noticed. Probably should get a better name for that. Here's the mechanism that turns off the spigot is we have a rule, internal criteria. It's an if then statement. You know, I studied computer science before I got into psychology, did that for two and a half years, and I did a ton with if then sequences. If this happens, make the program do this. And we have an if then sequence in our brain that says, if I am good enough, then I can feel love. If I'm not good enough, cannot feel love. If I'm good enough, then I can feel love. And what we're doing is when we say I'm not good enough, we turn the spigot off and we don't feel love. And we can have a million criteria why we're not good enough, I'm not smart enough, I'm not attractive enough, I didn't do that well enough, I didn't show up confidently enough, I was nervous, so therefore I wasn't good enough. So therefore I can't be loved. And we just turn it off right there and then we can't feel all the love that we want. So here's the thing. Stop turning off the spigot that those. You do not. Those don't. That does not compute. Error. Error. Right? You don't need to be more. You are enough already right now as you are to receive love. You don't need to be better than you are to receive love. To be worthy of love, to be loved. You already are loved. There are people around you right now that love you. You're swimming in an ocean of love and approval and acceptance and goodness. You are a spring. You're a continual source of love. You can love yourself right now. You don't have to be better. You are good enough. What if you're good enough right now? I was working with a client, and she was going to be going to this business meeting, mix everything. And there was a particular mentor of hers or someone who was in her organization that she really looked up to. And she had a number of interactions. I mean, the person knew her, they knew each other. But, you know, she always felt nervous around this woman and always kind of was trying to get this woman's approval and thinking that she wasn't quite getting it. And so sometimes she'd have an interaction with this woman, and then afterwards, even if it went well, they chatted for 20 minutes. It seemed good. She'd, like, replay it in her head 50,000 times and want to go apologize to this other person for being too awkward or too this or too that. And she really was tense about meeting this person always. And she was going to go to this mixer thing. Of course that person was going to be there. And I said, what if you knew that you were already enough? Absolutely knew it. Of course you were enough as you are right now. How would you show up? She's like, well, without missing a beat, I'd be confident. I'd be outspoken. I would talk to everyone there. I would join groups. I would. I would just feel good about myself. I'd really enjoy myself. I was like, great. And how would you work with or how would you talk to this particular mentor of hers, person she admired? And she said, I would just be myself. I would ask her questions, I would share with her. I would just enjoy talking with her. I wouldn't need anything from her. And I said, huh? It's a powerful question. What if you were already enough? What that's doing is. That's turning the hose back on. You don't need to be good enough. You can be loved right now for who you are with your nose just the way it is with your height, just your same height, with your current weight, with whatever appearance you have, with whatever qualities you're in, with the current job that you have, with the current income that you have, with the current challenges that you have, with the current fears and anxieties and depressive moods that you have, with the current failures and setbacks and unfinished projects that you have, all of those things, you're still enough. You're still loved. The concept of enough is just this weird, arbitrary thing. This is a bar that we set for ourselves. And we're never quite there. We're never quite enough. So we never most. A lot of people, I don't know if it's most. It might be most don't ever let themselves turn on the hose all the way. Well, I'm not quite there yet. Even crazy successful people. I've worked with a lot of really successful people who just want more confidence and they're like, yeah, but I'm not here yet. Or, yeah, I'm great at work and I'm really successful there, but not here. So they turn the hose off there. There's all dozens of rules. Well, I can't be nervous. Well, I didn't do that. Well, they didn't like me, so therefore I'm not enough. Not enough, not enough. Turn off the hose. Turn off the hose. So just do that with me right now. Take your hand and make that sound, too. I know, it's really. It's silly, right? Sounds and gestures work on your subconscious. And just imagine what color is the water that comes out of that hose. Is it clear? Is it bright? Is it crystal clear blue? Maybe it's bright yellow or pink. Whatever it is, just imagine it flowing. Imagine that you're bathed in that light. Imagine that people love you. There's a poster, a banner that I have at all my live events that says, the world is a friendly place. What if you are enough? Maybe we should make a poster that says that. What if you already are enough? Ooh. You might see that if you come to a live event, you are turn on the hose, let it in, and share below what works for you. How have you just accepted yourself as enough? What does it feel like as you've let more love in? Let's support each other. Let's share. And if you like this, click, like, subscribe. And if you really want to transform this area of your life, go deeper. Go to my website, socialconfidencecenter.com watch the videos there. Check out the free ebook I have There 5 Steps to Unleash youh inner confidence. This is something that you can transform for your entire life and your entire life, man. When you're getting more love, when you're letting more love in life, Is life so much better. That's really all we all want at the end of the day, and I want this for you. So go deeper if you're called to, if you want to. And until we speak again, May you have the courage to be who you are and to know on a deep level that you're awesome.