How To Instantly Become 10x More Attractive
27 Jul 2016 · 16 min
A podcast episode by Dr. Aziz (July 27, 2016) offering practical and mindset-focused strategies to rapidly increase personal attractiveness—primarily for dating and romantic relationships. The episode mixes actionable advice (grooming, posture, clothing, fitness), mindset work (eliminating self-stories, owning personal value), promotional material for Dr. Aziz's paid programs/events (30 Days to Dating Mastery, Unlimited/Ultimate Dating Confidence Bootcamp), and listener testimonials.
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Hey, everybody. Welcome to today's episode of the show. I am Dr. Aziz, and I'm excited because today we're going to be getting into you and how you can become a lot more attractive. And this could be for all areas of life, but usually we think of attractiveness in our dating life, our romantic life, and our relationships, and that's what we're gonna be talking about today. And there's a lot here, and I know a lot of people have a very fixed idea about how attractive you are. I know I did for many years. This is what I look like. This is how attractive I am on a scale of 1 to 10. And it's not that great. And I don't know if it can change. Maybe it can go up, like 0.5 points here or there, but this is just. I'm just not that attractive. And look at those people that are very attractive. You know, those people are out of reach. I can't be friends with them. I can't date women that are that attractive. So that was my story for a long time, and I'm excited to help you be free of that today. And speaking of being free in our dating lives, I'm super excited because we are doing a flash sale right now that's starting today and going for just three days from the 27th to the 29th of July here in 2016, where we're going to be having the entire 30 days to dating Mastery program on super sale, where it's 50% off. So normally it's $9.97 right now. You can get it during the sale for. For $4.97. And here's what I'm most excited about. When you get your copy of 30 Days to Dating Mastery during this three day flash sale, you also get a bonus. There's a number of bonuses, bonus programs that come with that. I mean, you can check it out. I'm not gonna list them all. Three ways to how to become irresistible. I forget all the bonuses. There's lots of bonuses, but. But the one I'm really excited about is a ticket to my upcoming event here in Portland in October, October 14 through 16, called the Unlimited Dating Confidence Bootcamp. That's what I'm most excited about, because then what you learn inside of 30 days to dating Mastery, you'll be applying it, you'll be getting some momentum, then you'll come here and you'll just break through and skyrocket to an even higher level. And I would love to work with you in person, dive deeper and see how we can help you massively shift. And what I'm so excited about for this is, is I know how fast this can shift. I know how quickly these stories can dissolve about who we are and what we deserve and how attractive we are and what's possible for us. And I've seen it happen so fast at these events. So I'd love for you to come. So to get your copy, just go to 30daystodatingmastery.com flash30days to dating mastery.com flash F L A S H. You get all the details there. We'll keep track of if you got it during this flash sale and then you'll get a ticket. We'll send you all the details. It's October 14th through 16th. I highly recommend coming the program itself, life changing and then coming out for a weekend even more so. So do that if you feel called to. And in today's episode, that's exactly what we're going to be getting into is how to be more attractive 10 times more attractive and fast instantly. Let's talk about how to do that now. So first of all, how attractive do you think you are right now in this moment? How attractive do you think you are to someone that would want to date you or that you hope would want to date you? The person that you're attracted to, the person that you want to spend time with? Maybe you know, a woman that you already would like to date, or just in general you're looking for someone you're hoping to connect. How attractive do you think you are? And not just intellectually, but how attractive do you feel? Because that is a huge factor in your dating success in your dating life. If you don't think you're that attractive, then it changes everything. It changes your behavior. It changes your eye contact, changes your body language, changes what you say and what you do and how you approach people. And if you approach people, all of that is based in some way on how attractive you think you are. And if you don't think you're that attractive, then you think your odds of getting rejected are higher. And as a result, you are not going to want to reach out and approach someone, right? Because you think you're going to get rejected. Maybe your mind even tells you that it's a certainty that you're going to get rejected because you're not attractive. That was my experience for a long time. I was convinced that I was not attractive. And like you might be doing in your head, you might have a lot of stories and evidence as to why that's true. You might be saying, yeah, that's easy for you to say, Aziz, but you don't understand about blank and in the blank, insert your reasons why you think you're not attractive. Your height, your weight, your face structure, your teeth, your eyes, your hair. Or maybe it's something about your life. I don't have enough money. I have a roommate. I live with my parents. Whatever it is, that's your story as to why you're not attractive. Good. And just notice that. And I had that for many years. For me, it was, I am not muscular enough, kind of smaller, weaker guy. My legs are skinny, I'm kind of scrawny, and I have very unattractive darkness around my eyes. It makes me look like I'm tired. And just. No woman would find that attractive. That was my story. Or those are my stories about my appearance. And I was. If you asked me how certain I was, I'd say 100% certain. So what are your stories of why you're not attractive? And at this point, don't get into a battle of if it's true or not, because then we're already stepping ahead of ourselves. We need to slow down. What are your stories as to why you're not attractive? Or maybe not attractive at all, but less attractive. What brings you from a 10 out of 10 down to a 5 or a 6 or an 8 or a 3 or whatever your perception of how attractive you are is. Come up with those stories now? Maybe you're so aware of them that it's just. You don't have to come up with them. They're just floating around all the time. But maybe you're not even that aware. Maybe you're just. You've taken something as fact. You've absorbed something from media, from society, from some fucking YouTube video you saw eight years ago. If YouTube even existed back then. I think it did. You know, five years ago. Good. I would encourage you to really think of those. Write them down. Now we're gonna take a quick break, and when we get back, we're gonna shred these. We're gonna help you see what's really going on and help you become way more attractive right now. Ready? Stay tuned.
Are you single? Do you want to meet someone but feel completely held back and stuck when it comes to meeting women, flirting, and getting dates? After spending over a decade of his life stuck in the same struggle, Dr. Aziz found the way to freedom and confidence with women. It's what he teaches his private clients how to do every day. Want to get There yourself. Go to 30days to dating mastery.com to get a free copy of Dr. Aziz's e book, 7 Ways to Start Conversations with Women, Anytime, Anywhere, and start meeting women today.
Welcome back. Okay, let's talk about attractiveness. Let's talk about you and how you can become more attractive. So did you get your list of stories? Do you have reasons why you're telling yourself that you're not attractive? Okay, let's break this down. Okay. There's two types of reasons or stories that I found. There are things that you can't do anything about, barring, like, extreme procedures, you know, and then there's things that you can do something about. So what are some things you can't do something about? So me. The area around my eyes, the color. You can't really do anything about that. Your nose, your facial structure. I guess you could get plastic surgery. Although I highly. I definitely would want to. I think there's a lot of work you can do before taking that approach. And Maxwell Maltz was his name as a plastic surgeon who became obsessed with personal growth after he did surgery for many years. Because he started to say, hey, there's people that come get plastic surgery and nothing's solved. They just want something else done right. And he was saying, it's all about self esteem and inner game. So there's the things that you can't do anything about, and there's the things that you can do something about. What are the things you can do something about? Well, how about if you're critical of your weight, if you're critical of your physical appearance, not in terms of what you were born with, but because of how you've been living, then it's time to take ownership of that. Because when we say, oh, no woman's gonna want me because I'm fat, we're in such a victim mode. It's. We're stuck. We're victim of circumstance. We're at an effect in life. We're not a cause, we're not powerful, we're not creators. And so we say, well, I'm fat and women won't want me. There's like double victim there. One, women are choosing me. I don't have any power. They're choosing me. And secondly, I don't have any power. I'm just fat. That's just how it is. And there's probably loads of stories in there. So then it's a matter of ending the excuses and the stories. And there's a great couple chapters in my new book, the Art of Extraordinary confidence, which is all about that. How to eliminate and slice through excuses and stories, face fear. And then we can just get into bold action. Because if you want to change your body, health and get more in shape, great. Get yourself into bold action. So that's something. You have control over all kinds of things. And this is really interesting. So I wasn't. I'm an attractive guy. I used to think I wasn't, but I am. I know that now. And I didn't do things that featured that. So I didn't really get haircuts, cut my own hair didn't look very good. I wore, like, really raggy kind of cheap thrift store clothes. They were not raggy. They weren't, like, tatters, but they just didn't fit that well. And they just didn't look. They just didn't dress that well. And when I decided I wanted to get a girlfriend and start meeting women, I said, you know what? Let me actually put a little of attention to my appearance. And I actually got a woman who was very stylish. She was from la, and I said, hey, and that she was someone that I worked with. And I told her, like, hey, I need better. I need a makeover. Can you help me out? And she loved it. And she went to the store with me and picked things out for me that I never would have. I was like, oh, designer jeans. Oh, my God, Those are like $150, right? And I didn't want to. No, I don't want to. But here's the thing. It doesn't have to be designer stuff. It doesn't have to be expensive. I have some amazing clothes right now that are relatively cheap. I don't. I'm not a big fan of the designer stuff, but you just. It just fits you better, you know, like, don't get the big, saggy jeans that kind of like parachutes floating around in them, you know, and then the gigantic shirt that goes down past your crotch.
It's comfortable.
I know it's comfortable, man. I do most of my work in sweatpants these days. And still, if I was going out to potentially meet women, you want to dress well. So these are the things you have control over your haircut. You know, if you spend all day in front of a computer and you're hunched over and you're pale and you're just like, you know, then get some sun, go out, learn how to stretch and open up, do some yoga and stretch your back open so you can stand upright. Your full posture. These are all things we have control over. And good God, these are not just to get women. These are not just. Or if you're a woman listening, this is not just to get a man. This is for you to be your optimal self, your optimal healthy self. Because check this out. You at your most healthiest, most attractive. So it's optimal for you to be at your healthiest, not just to, you know, one. Because you maybe want a partner or a date or whatever, but just for you to feel your best, to feel your happiest, your most energetic, your most confident, to go out here and do whatever it is you're here to do, which is much bigger than just a relationship, I guarantee you that. So focus on now, with me here. What are the things I have control over? Let me get into a state, take all of that hopelessness and victim, oh, it's not fair, it's never gonna work. And just channel it, get pissed off at it and say, you know what?
Enough.
Fuck that. I'm gonna take charge of my life. I'm gonna take charge of my destiny. I'm not gonna victim anymore. I'm gonna do what it takes to figure out my health, to figure out my appearance, to get, you know, as polished as I can be, not just for women, but just because I'm gonna show up bold and full and strong. Because I'm an attractive man. I'm an attractive person, and I'm gonna do this. And the more you can own it, the more you can make it not just something that you put on to impress or get her, but because this is who you are, and you own that. Then things start to open up, and then you start to have more opportunities and more connections and more doors open. Because, you know, you don't just get that door slammed in your face right away because of your appearance. And there is much more. This is just a tip of the iceberg. I just want to get this stuff out of the way because it does matter. But we need to get to the core. We need to get to what's going to get you. Emanating attractiveness, emanating confidence, emanating magnetism. And that's what we're going to get into right after this. So stay tuned. We're going to take one more quick break, and we'll be right back. I want to take one moment to acknowledge a listener who left me a message through the website shrink. For the shy guy, it was really touching, really compelling. And he just shared how much he's grown, and it's awesome to hear about his progress. So let's jump into that right now.
Hi, Dr. Aziz. My name is Will, and I am enrolled in both your programs, confidence unleashed and 30 days to dating Mastery. And I just want to thank you for offering these two programs online. I've been really sticking to them a lot, and I found that I'm able to do a lot more. I'm not as shy as I used to. I am definitely a lot more confident. And the most important thing, I think, is that I feel that I love myself. I love myself a lot more. I'm not beating myself up as much as I'm used to. So I want to thank you for your time listening to this, and thank you for the amazing ipod, the streams that you do on Shrink for the Shy guy, and I hope you have a great weekend.
Thank you. Welcome back. So let's get into the core of it here. And this is what we're. This is what the weekend's all about. That I'm gonna be talking about the one I was mentioning at the beginning of the episode, the October 1st Ultimate Dating Confidence Bootcamp, which you can get a free ticket to when you get your copy of 30 Days to Dating Mastery, which is 50% off right now for the next three days. OMG, it's gonna be awesome. And that's at 3.0days to Dating Mastery. 30 Days to Dating mastery.com/f l a S H. And you can actually go to the Show Notes at Shrink for the Shy Guy for this episode, and we'll have a link there, too. So what are we going to be doing at the weekend? What is the core of attractiveness, of becoming 10 times more attractive now that you've gotten out of victim and taking ownership of the things you have control over? Is this maximizing your own value, seeing yourself as extremely valuable? When you get this, then everything opens up. So right now you're thinking your value might be just in your physical appearance, and then it's not that great. Right, because you judge yourself. Or maybe you're thinking, maybe you're not even aware of your value. Maybe you're just aware of all your flaws and criticisms. And I'm working with one client right now, and all he is aware of is the ways that he's not enough. The way he's not good enough for her. He doesn't have this, he doesn't have that. He's too this, he's too skinny. He doesn't have enough money. He's this, he's that. He has just all these reasons why he's low value. He's not valuable. And when we think we're not valuable, we're lost, we're toast, we're done. We're gonna get rejection after rejection, and then if we do have someone that's interested on us, it's gonna be someone that maybe you're settling for that you're not that excited about. But you think, well, geez, there's not that many options, so I guess I'll just take it. And that further erodes your self esteem because deep down you think, okay, the women I'm really drawn to would never want anything to do with a loser like me. So when we are low value, we're toast. And it shows up in everything. And that is the biggest thing to shift, is knowing in your core how valuable you are. And it goes way beyond appearance, way beyond that. Appearance might get your foot in the door. Appearance might get you laid a little more easily. But if you want to create, if you want to have a girlfriend. And a lot of people I talk to, they don't even have a concept of what that is. I didn't have a concept. You have this sort of life where you don't have that much contact with women. A lot of it's fantasy and in your head and a lot of porn and a lot of like, I don't really know. I'm so lonely. And it's like, well, I hope I can connect with a woman. I want a girlfriend. But we don't actually know what that is. I didn't know what that was. I thought that was like, well, you hang out together and have sex and it's awesome, but it's a relationship. It's two humans coming together. Why are we in a relationship with anyone now? If your reasons are obligation. Because I have to be. They're family. Well, not those relationships. And, you know, maybe you ought to check that out and see if all your relationships can be by choice instead of obligation. Anyway. The relationships we choose with our friendships, with our dating and romantic life, we choose them because our lives are better with that person in it. When we hang out with that person, we generally feel better. They bring something to our lives, it's of value to us. That's what's gonna get a woman to want to spend time with you. That's what's gonna make her want to not just hang out once, but like, hang out again and again and again and be loyal and loving and not want any other man. Not because of your appearance. That is not going to last very long at all. What's Going to last is the value that you bring. And you want to become really aware of what that value is. I don't know what it is for you, but you do. Even if you're not aware of it right now, part of you knows what that is. And you got to find. You got to dig deep and find it. So what is it for you? I got a jag on a jag this week with a lot of my single clients. And I was like, I told like three of them. I was like, this is what you got to do. You got to go on a long walk. I didn't say it like that, but you got to go on a long walk. Or I encourage you to go on a, you know, 30, 40 hour long walk and just get connected with your value. Why is it awesome to be in a relationship with you? Why would it be great? Why would someone's life be better with you in it? Why would someone be lucky to have you as a partner or as a boyfriend or as a girlfriend, as a husband, as a wife, as a lover? And the reason I say go for a long walk is because initially your mind might say nothing. Well, doesn't. Yeah, but you got bad teeth and you just. Man walking helps with that shit. Get out in nature or just even on sidewalks in your city on a nice day, or with an umbrella, whatever, just get out there, start moving, start breathing, and just say, okay, that's right. Criticism, self judgment, which is all just protection, it's all just safety, police fear stuff. And beneath that, what is my value? What do I bring? How is someone. And just look at your current relationships. Are you funny? Do you make people laugh? Are you attentive? Are you a great listener? Do people feel seen and heard by you? Do they like to share things with you? Are you intelligent? Do you help guide people? Do you help give people great advice or suggestions on specific challenges in specific areas? Are you a lifelong learner? Or do you have interesting things that you've taken in about psychology and people and business and life? Do you have a great perspective on things? What is the value that you bring? And you want to become really aware of it. So aware that in fact, when I was recording this, I was recording this right now and I was planning it out. I didn't think of doing this. This is just spontaneous. But I'm going to do it. It's like, well, what is my value? And you want it to have it be so ready, so in your consciousness, so available. You're so connected to it that you can just speak it at will. You don't have to pre plan it. So if you were to say, what about you, Aziz? Why is Candace lucky to be with you? Like, well, dude, I'm awesome. I am good looking. I have a great smile. I'm charming. I'm hilarious. I'm really funny. I make people laugh all the time. I make her laugh all the time. I. I love to make people laugh. So it's like they're laughing and I feel good as I'm doing it. And we're just having a great time. I am incredibly loyal and loving with her, very gentle and compassionate and sweet. I have a deep, deep level of commitment in me. And one thing that makes her incredibly lucky, and I know she appreciates this is how I am. A lot of people are kind of like, well, I'm in this. But, you know, if you change too much, if your appearance changes or you get old, I'm not going to find you attractive anymore. That's a story that a lot of people have, and I am very clear about. Fuck that. It's, you know, we don't want to take any messages from society that tell us because something changes in our body or because we have wrinkles or we have gray hair, we go bald or we're fat or whatever, that we're bad. And it's our responsibility. It's my responsibility to do my inner work, the spiritual work, so that I see deep beauty, regardless of how appearance changes. And I know she's tremendously relieved by that because lots of women. She's 43. Lots of women have fear that as they get older, their partner's not going to find them attractive anymore. Another reason I'm amazing is she can talk with me about anything. I'm super nonjudgmental. I'm very good at talking to people, as you might guess from the work that I do. I mean, I could go on. I could probably go on for a whole episode about this. And here's the thing. This isn't egotistical. This is healthy. You want to be able to do this, and you might say, well, that's bad. That's just your critic trying to smash you down. You got to let that go, man. Because if you can own this to the level that I'm owning right now, you become so magnetic, you become so attractive, your fear of rejection plummets and. And the responses that you get skyrocket. So that naturally brings us to our action stuff. Time for action. Your action step for today is to go on a long walk, perhaps by the water for 30, 45 or 60 minutes on a nice day or on a rainy day with an umbrella, whatever it takes. And get connected with your value. Let the criticisms come and go, the self judgment come and go. Know that those are just stories, things trying to protect you from pain or rejection. Dig deep. Find your value. Get associated to it. Make a list of it. Be able to recite that list and speak that list. And as you do that, your attractiveness will skyrocket. And you can do this today. So get out there. Go for that walk today, sometime this week, go to 30days to datingmastery.com flash and get yourself a copy of the program. You won't regret it. Your life will transform like mine did many years ago when I got my first dating program online. And join me for the weekend if you think this is like, if you're feeling something stirring, like, whoa, yeah, maybe I can feel my value. Maybe it is possible for me we're gonna just blow the roof off of this. My goal is for everyone to leave their feeling and knowing their value in such a powerful way that they might, you know, forget about it. They get rejected and they're like, oh, I'm a loser. I mean, we all have that, right? But then their center of gravity kicks in and they go right back to knowing their value. Because from that place, your dating life, your relationships and all of your life really starts to open up. So thank you so much for being with me today. Until we speak again, may you have the courage to be who you are and to know on a deep level that you're awesome. Talk to you soon.
Thanks for listening to Shrink for the Shy guy with with Dr. Azeez. If you know anyone who can benefit from what you've just heard, please let them know and send them a link to shrinkforthshyguy.com for free blogs, ebooks and training videos related to overcoming shyness and increasing confidence, go to social confidencecenter.com. Sam.










