Dr. Aziz gives short, practical advice on consciously choosing friends by evaluating how interactions make you feel using a simple three-point system: plus (energized), zero (neutral), or minus (drained). He recommends spending time with the 'pluses' and identifying recurring themes in past relationships to find more compatible friends.
If you don't consciously pick your friends, you're either not going to have friends or you're going to have just kind of whatever you get, which is not necessarily the best for you. So how do you pick your friends? Try this. After you spend time with somebody, just tune in and see. Would I give that a plus, a zero or a minus? Plus is I feel energized, I feel uplifted, I feel seen, connected, happy, playful, something positive. Zero is neutral. And minus is like, oh man, I feel drained. That was hard. I was irritating. I'm agitated. Something's not right. Go through your friendships, hang out with the pluses. And if you're like, I don't really have that many friends, then think back in your life and what were the themes? Who are the kind of people that tend to bring out a plus in you? Find those people, find those themes, create relationships with those people and your friendships will be awesome.
