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Dr. Aziz outlines four steps to break people-pleasing: decide niceness isn't worth the cost, actually say no and speak up, work through the guilt that follows, and repeat until you shift. He says the trait can change.
Dr. Aziz outlines four steps to break people-pleasing: decide niceness isn't worth the cost, actually say no and speak up, work through the guilt that follows, and repeat until you shift. He says the trait can change.
If you're a people pleaser, I have some urgent news for you. It turns out that the vast majority of people who are people pleasers will never change this in their entire lives because it's a personality trait that seems to be fixed. But guess what? You can change it with these four simple steps. Step number one decide that you're not going to be nice anymore. You know it's causing you way more problems than benefit in your life. Number two do the not nice thing. Speak up. Ask directly, say no. The things that make you feel guilty or anxious, do those things. Step Step number three work through the stuff that comes up. Dismantle the guilt. Challenge the old stories. Check out my books not nice or less nice. More you to give you tools on how to do this. And step number four is repeat do those things again and again and again and you will change your personality. You will become the most bold, authentic version of you.
