I Hate The Sound Of My Own Voice (How To Fix)

Do you hate the sound of your own voice? Perhaps in a recording or in video? Maybe it's your own appearance. Anytime you see yourself or hear yourself in a recording, you cringe. You want to get away from it. And then if there's an opportunity to put yourself out there in some way, whether it's for promotions at work, this is becoming more and more common with clients I work with who have their own business. They want to put themselves out there in social media or elsewhere. Oh, I don't like the sound of my voice. I don't like the way that I look. Or even a friend whoops out a phone to take a little video when you're out and you're like, get away from me. And I can absolutely relate to that. I'll tell a little story in this video about that, and I'm going to share a unique technique that I think will change things more than anything else. That's what it's done in my life and for the lives of many of my clients. So I'm going to share that with you today for free. You ready? You excited? Okay. So the hating of the voice. I remember there was this moment we were in high school and there was like, about to graduate getaway. We went to something. It was like an hour away from our school, and everyone spent the night in the woods somewhere in some cabins or something. And there was someone there who's filming. And this was back in the day. So it was like a camcorder. There's no cell phones back in my day. Anyway, there was someone filming and they had you talk about it was they were going to show it at the reunion 20 years from then or something. So I was like, talk to your future self and what do you want to tell them? And so, you know, they're kind of pulling people one by one to go do this filming. And they sit me down and I wasn't even nervous ahead of time because I don't think I'd ever done anything like that before. And then they put the camera on me and I just get flushed with anxiety. I'm so nervous, and I'm just overwhelmed by how much I hate my voice. I hate my appearance. I thought I was so ugly at that age. And I don't even remember what I said. I just said something like, I hope you're happy, and then ran off. It was felt so embarrassed after. It was awful. And that was the beginning. I hate my appearance. I hate my voice on camera. Like, I already knew I didn't like the way I looked in the mirror, but now I hold a whole other dimension of disliking myself. And so that was, you know, you could say, oh, that's for kids. It doesn't really matter. As an adult, though it can significantly impair you in the ways that I was describing at the beginning of this video. So how's it affecting you? And even if it doesn't really severely limit your life or your business, to hate yourself in video or audio recording, that's kind of a little bit of a canary in the coal mine, a little bit of a red flag, isn't it? Hating yourself. That's not normal. I mean, well. Well, it's normal, but it's insane. And that's what I talk about in my book. Almost the whole first part of the book is called insanity, which is it's like the insane normal. Everyone's like, do you hate yourself? Me too. Isn't that fine? It's not fine. It's messed up. And so we want to have an alarm bell go off and say, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, what's going on there? And then here's how to solve it. So some people try to say affirmation. I love myself. My voice is beautiful. I'm beautiful. Maybe that's worked for you if you're watching this video. Probably not. Didn't super work for me. Affirmation. Sometimes they have a very specific use, but usually it's only to get someone into action, not as a total reprogramming. That's my perspective. But you don't need to do affirmations to shift this. You can if you want. But here's what I'm going to suggest. Let's zoom out a little bit. I don't like the sound of my voice or my appearance or whatever it is. So therefore. What? Well, therefore I don't want to be recorded. I don't want to be on camera. I don't want to be have someone audio record. I don't want to put my voice out there in a podcast or in a marketing video. Right. Okay. So the reason is because I don't like my voice. Well, what's the result of that? Well, my voice is bad. Okay, well then what? Well, then people are going to laugh at me. People are going to hear my voice and be revolted, dislike me. And then, of course, if it's for some other purpose like marketing or whatever, they're not going to want to buy anything from me. They're not going to want to listen to me or follow me. They're going to Hate me. Right. So we conclude that because my voice is, quote, bad, according to me, no one's going to like me or I'm not going to get the result that I'm hoping for. Now, if you've watched any other videos on my channel or read any of my books or anything, this is the mechanism of the safety police, where it predicts that people aren't going to like you, Bad things are going to happen, so don't take the risk. Right. Classic example is you think you're ugly, so you're not to go approach someone that you find attractive. I know that one well because I played from that playbook for, like, I know that one well because I use that playbook for about 15 years. Nope, nope. Out of my league. Can't go approach that person. Look, I got to avoid being rejected potentially. Yeah. Interesting how that works. In any case, you think that you know what's going to happen and so you don't take the risk. And that's the exact same thing that's happening with the dislike of your voice. So my solution to this, which has worked extremely well for me and for other people, because I actually got this question three times this last week, which is why we recorded this video. Three different people, totally unrelated to each other, asked me, how long did it get for you to get comfortable on camera because you record a lot of stuff, you dislike the sound of your own voice. I was like, no. They're like, well, I hate my own voice or I hate my own appearance on film. I was like, ah, well, I used to. I don't. They said, well, how did you get over it? How long did it take? And I started asking me these questions. I just started to record this video. So what is the solution? The solution is the same for any way that you want to defy the inner critic and defy doubt, which is you must do the thing that it says is going to go badly repeatedly. Now what does that mean? So if you're afraid someone's going to reject me, you have to approach a lot of people and realize that prediction is overblown. Not everyone's gonna reject you. Some people might. And you can learn that you can handle that. So it's the same thing with your voice. So I remember I was talking to someone just yesterday, and he wants to get more marketing videos out there for his own business. I was like, well, how many have you recorded? He says, well, not. I don't like the sound of my own voice. I said, okay, great. So if you really want to solve this, don't wait around doing affirmations, trying to like the sound of your own voice. That just keeps you in an endless holding pattern. Instead, make a commitment. Over the next three weeks, I'm gonna record 10 marketing videos or whatever numbers you wanna and I'm going to do it. I'm going to get them edited, I'm going to put them out there, I'm going to release them, right? Because if you just record them and then stuff them in a desk drawer somewhere, how's that any sort of exposure? I'm going to release them. But that's with, oh my God, people are going to hear my voice. I'm going to get negative comments. Your voice is so awful that I'm going to cry. Okay, maybe, maybe. And then you'll learn that you can handle that. But you're also going to find that you're probably not going to get any negative. Probably no one's going to watch those videos, right? It's going to take a long time to get some momentum on your videos. Maybe you got to put 100 out there over like a year before you start getting views, right? So let's get going. Let's not wait another six months, six years to get into our lives. Let's go now. And what you'll find is don't wait for yourself to like your voice. Just start recording, recording, recording, recording, go, go, go, go, go, go. And eventually it dissolves. Truly it does. Why? Because you disliking your voice isn't like an objective reality that your voice is quote, bad. It's a feeling of dislike. And why do you dislike it? Because you're afraid. And when you finally just put yourself out there and go, go, go, record, record, record, the fear dissolves and the need to dislike, it dissolves as well. If you don't have a business or anything, I would recommend recording yourself and just doing it repeatedly. Release some videos on YouTube or share some videos with friends, or you know, record an audio and send it to your friend. Like, I did this all the time with my brother. We communicate a lot via audio message because we have both very busy lives and instead of trying to find time for phone calls, we often just exchange 5, 10 minutes of audio a day and just do that. It's oh, but I hate the sound of my voice. So what? Keep doing it. Look for opportunities. So if you keep looking for ways to not do it, then that dislike will stay there forever no matter how many affirmations you do. And when you look for opportunities to do it, to confront that fear, it will dissolve. Okay, hope this serves you. Let me know any other video ideas or questions you have, put them in the comments below and I look forward to serving you more in future videos. Until we speak again, May have the courage to be who you are and to know on a deep level that you're awesome.