One Technique To Rapidly Transform Your Confidence

Do you tend to see yourself in a negative light? Like, I am not attractive enough. I can't do this, I'm not good enough, I'm going to fail. People won't like me. Any form of that. Do you want to shift it to I'm awesome. Of course people are going to like me. Of course I can do that. I'm the man. Then watch this episode. We're going to talk about how to transform your identity faster and more rapidly than ever before. I'm going to share one of my most powerful life changing techniques with you in today's video. Welcome to another episode of the Art of Extraordinary Confidence. I'm your host, Dr. Aziz, and this is a show for you if you want to 10x your confidence in your dating life, your social life, your relationships, your career, your finances, just how you feel about yourself. Because when you feel confident, life is good and good things happen. So let's talk about how to continually escalate confidence, our confidence. And today we're going to be talking about a huge subject which is how to transform your identity. How to go from I can't and I'm not good enough and I'm not this to I am good enough and I'm awesome. And of course good things are going to happen. And when we make that shift, doors open up, people are attracted to us, tons of good things happen. And this is actually coming from the last episode I did. I talked about identity. People had a lot of questions about it, so I thought I would go deeper on how to change your identity. Again, that's a huge topic. You can learn a ton more about it in my program, Confidence Unleashed, which has nine modules, hours of time. It's a system, so it's a specific sequence and there's a module in there about transforming our stories and our identity. So that's like the comprehensive version. This is a super powerful laser technique version. What I can share in this kind of format. Shorter videos. So here's how to change your identity. Now, first of all, someone here has changed their identity and they're like, what? Like not be who I am or wear a trench coat like a hat? Like a. Like Raphael the Ninja Turtle when he's going into the city and doesn't want people to. You guys remember that. I don't know if the original Ninja Turtles, I don't know if they still do this. In the Ninja Turtles. The original Ninja Turtles, one of these like gigantic green mutant turtles would freaking walk around New York City with a trench coat on and a hat and like People somehow didn't notice, like, what the fuck? You're a turtle. I don't know, maybe they clung to the shadows because they were ninjas. But anyway, didn't seem to bother me. When I was a kid, I thought it was awesome. Number two, Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. Number two, Secret of the Ooze. Probably one of my top five kid movie favorites. I'm gonna force my son to watch it. Dad, this is old and outdated. Shut up. You gotta see this. Anyway, I digress. Where was I? Identity. It doesn't mean you have to change who you are. You're going to become more of who you are. Because this identity, this negative. I'm no good. I'm not attractive. People aren't going to like me. That's not who you are. That is not who you are. The more confident version is who you are. Yes, I can. I am awesome. I am attractive. That is who you are in your core. And you know how I know this? Because I know at one time in your life you were three years old. And that is what every three year old thinks and perceives about themselves. They don't think they're not attractive. They don't think they're not funny. They don't think they can't do it. In fact, they're the opposite. Of course I'm attractive. I don't run around saying that. But that's how they think. That's how they operate. Of course people would want to love me. Of course they'd want to do what I tell them or ask them to do. Of course I can. Give it to me. I'll try it. My son is too. And that's why he's like, me, do it. Me. I do it. I can just. We have a little potty. Potty train. He's got his little junior potty and he goes in it and it's full of like pee and poop. And, you know, we would take it and dump it in the regular toilet and flush it. And now it's like, I'm gonna do it. Me, me, me. Take it. And we're like. At first I was like, well, let me help you, because I don't want you to spill it all over the place. Because guess who's cleaning that up? And he's like, me, I'll do it. I do it. And it's just like, oh, okay, just let him do it. Let's just. Instead of treating him like he's not capable, let's wait until he dumps it all over the floor. And then I can start helping him because maybe you can do it. Fine. And guess what? He can. He runs. He doesn't run. He walks across the floor, dumps this like full thing and flushes the toilet down. It's fascinating to watch. It's a little self contained unit now. So he thinks, of course I can. Even if he doesn't say that. So you were just like that. You knew you were attractive, you knew you could do things. You knew people wanted to be with you. You knew you could ask for things and it wasn't a problem. That's your core, that is your identity. So how do we shift to that? How do we get back to that? Here's a simple and powerful technique to do that. One of the reasons why we have a hard time shifting our identity, you might have tried this with affirmations or something like that, is you're telling yourself day in and out, I'm not attractive. I can't do it. It's not going to work. I'm not good enough. And then you say, well, that's not, you know, you read some self help thing or watched a video and you're like, you know what? Today's a new day. I'm gonna. I am attractive. Gosh darn it. People do like me. And you do some affirmations and they don't really work or they kind of work or I don't know. People have a lot of experiences all over the map, but they're not like the answer that people are looking for. And what happens is they say this new thing and then they think to themselves, no, I'm not. No, you're not. That's not true. You're just blowing smoke. Oh, you're just saying this stuff to try to make it true, but it's really not. I. Other people really don't think you're attractive. Look at that example over there. And your critic just takes a shit on it. And then you're stuck. In fact, you go back to where you were and feel more deflated. So how do we actually change our identity? Because when we say those things, it doesn't register as true. And if we try to fight for it. No, it is true. No, it is true. Then we're just in this battle. And here is a simple workaround I found to be incredibly helpful is instead of I'm this or I'm that, I'm this and I'm that. Change the or to and I'm telling you it's simple, but it works. TSW shit works. So imagine this. I was Talking with a client, and he was feeling really like he's, you know, I'm nervous. His identity. I'm nervous, I'm awkward, I'm anxious. I don't speak up. I make people uncomfortable. Those were pieces of his identity, his social identity, particularly showing up in his social life and his work, too. Even just talking to colleagues. I'm awkward before meetings, that sort of thing. Imagine a circle. Draw a little circle out, right? A little, small circle. That's his small identity. The small, not likable, not good, not confident, awkward guy, small identity. And then we were saying, well, what is the bigger identity? Well, I am confident. I can speak up. People do like me. I am assertive. I am bold. I am charming. I am funny. I can tell great stories. It's all this other thing now. Instead of saying, what would happen is he would tell himself that, and maybe he had some experiences where he was like that, but then he'd have another experience where he felt nervous or awkward or held back or inhibited or shy. And he said, ah, you see? You see? That's who you really are. That other thing was just a fluke because he was thinking as this or that. But it's not. It's just, are you here or are you here? You can go back and forth and back and forth, and they're both you. They're all part of you. You are everything. I am incredibly confident and assertive and outgoing and charming, and sometimes I'm nervous and shy and awkward. I have a ton of things to say. I know how to put people at ease. I can have great conversations. And sometimes I have no fucking idea what to talk about. I believe in myself. I know I can do it. I take bold action, and sometimes I doubt the hell out of myself. And I hold myself back. You are it. All this and that. So instead of being so worried and limited and like, oh, God, I got to get rid of this, and I'm stuck in this, just say, yeah, I can fall back into that. Everyone can. And it's as simple as that. You can shift, and I love that. Think about it like I'm making that sound on purpose. Take a breath in. It's like a balloon. Expand it up. Breathe it in. Expand your lungs like a balloon. Bring your shoulders back. Pop into that new identity and take bold action from that place. You are that. Look at your life. You will find evidence already of that, that you want to be. I am funny. Look for evidence of that. I am attractive. Look for evidence of that. I am awesome. I am capable. I can do what I put my mind to. Look for evidence of that and you will find it. It's already in you. You are this and you are that. So don't fight it if you are nervous in a situation. Okay, so what? Sometimes I'm nervous and I'm still really confident. Two. Right. It's a paradox. Our mind is like, no, no, it's A or B. A or B, A or B. That's just the, you know, the binary thinking of our mind. But no, expand it this and that. So what is your bigger identity? Who are you at your best and how can you bring more and more of that into the world? And just like, share with us, share what your identity is. That'd be awesome if you share that in the comments. Share what you're learning. Share questions you have. Share challenges. Share what works for you. Do you have other tips and techniques on how to expand your identity? Share below. Let's all help each other out until we speak again. Have the courage to be who you are. Show who you are, share who you are, Express who you are and know that who you are is awesome.