A short motivational YouTube talk by Dr. Aziz teaching a practical technique to care less about others' opinions: instead of pushing through shame, act as if the world you want already exists (e.g., "own the pose"). He uses a personal anecdote—doing sun salutations on a San Francisco street corner—to show how modeling desired behavior creates a new social norm, reduces fear of judgment, and encourages others (including his children). The video closes with a CTA to join a Facebook group and mentions his "Shrink for the shy guy" podcast.
Chapters
Hey, welcome to your weekly confidence boost. Today, I want to talk about something that I know you're Gonna Love. I'm Dr. Aziz, by the way, in case you don't know. Probably know if you're getting these, but I know you're gonna love this, because this is something that everybody wants more of, which is how to care less about what people think. And this one is money, because this one works. So often times, you know, we realize we got to do something. We gotta. You know, maybe I want to make a change or I want to speak up or I want to try something, but. But, man, what are other people gonna think? What are my family members gonna think? What are people that know me gonna think? Man, I don't know. And that can hold us back for weeks, months, or even years. And it can show up in all kinds of ways. You know, what we say, what kinds of hobbies we have, our interests, our career pursuits, how we dress, how we wear our hair. Like, from the smallest to the biggest. You know, what we eat. Oh, my gosh, my family's gonna judge me for eating this way, or. Oh, they're gonna judge me for wearing these different clothes, or all this stuff can. Can extremely limit us and just give us a lot of concern. And it can hold us back in even bigger ways in our lives too, Right? Like, maybe you don't pursue a certain career or vocation that you love because, you know, maybe you don't write that book because what would other people think, right? So let me teach you something that's gonna be really powerful to help you shift this. So oftentimes we use the push through method, which is like, all right, I'm gonna try to. You know, after remaining caged for many years, we're like, all right, I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna push through, and I'm gonna. And then there's all this judgment coming our way. Either literal people are saying it, or we imagine it's coming, and it's like this force that's like, get smaller, go down. And we're like, no, I'm gonna do it. I don't care what anyone thinks. And you got this whole thing going on. It's a lot of tension, a lot of stress. There's a better way here. Let me tell you a story about how so many years ago, I was on a street corner with my friend Dimitri. And Dimitri is an amazing man. I actually just had an opportunity to interview him recently for my podcast that'll be airing probably in a month or two on Shrink for the shy guy. If you're not familiar with that podcast, check it out on itunes. Shrink for the shy guy. It's been going for five years now. Amazing show, amazing reservoir of knowledge for free. If you want to binge on that, go do that. It'll skyrocket your confidence, guaranteed. Anyway, I had an opportunity to interview Demetri after many years. We hadn't talked. We kind of met, moved to different cities. Anyway, I love that, man. And one time we were on a street corner together in San Francisco, and I'd been getting into more yoga at that time of my life, and I really loved stretching. Stretching felt good. And we were waiting around for something. I don't remember what. And I just. I wanted to stretch. But we were in a busy street, you know, area in San Francisco. We're outdoors. I think we were waiting on someone to pick us up. And so then I'm like, stretching a little bit, you know, doing some, like, normal stretches that are allowed. And then I kind of bend down towards my toes, but, you know, and he's like, what are you doing? And I'm like, I'm stretching. And he's like, man, if you're gonna stretch, just own the stretch. You know, if you're gonna do a yoga pose. Because I was doing, like, these semi yoga poses that look more casual. He's like, if you're gonna do a yoga pose, like, own the pose. Let, like, God move through you, and you do it. And with this encouragement, we did this full round of sun salutations there on that street corner in San Francisco. If you're not familiar, sun salutation, you can look it up on YouTube. It's just like, you bend down, you do this, like, curl up. You're not just, like, kind of casually. You're, like, fully doing this yoga move, right? And then you're up, and then you're down, and it's like this big thing. And what was amazing about that is I didn't feel any fear of what other people were going to think. It was so liberating. I thought about it since then, I was like, how did I do that? And what was happening was, in that moment, I was fully connected to. This is the world that I want to live in. It's crazy to live in a world where you can't. Like, stretching and doing something healthy is weird. Meanwhile, down the street, at the bar, at the tables outside on the sidewalk, there's someone there with a cigarette, drinking a beer, and everyone's like, that's normal. That guy over there Stretching. What the hell's wrong with him, right? And I'm like, that's crazy. I want to be in a world where I can do that and. And it's normal. So how do I create that world? I freaking do it. And now I do stuff like that all the time when my kids are around so they can watch me. So it's like, oh, it's normal. It's normal to do something, you know, stretch on a street corner. It's normal to yell out your incantations about why you're powerful and what you're grateful for in your life while you're taking a cold shower in the morning because he sees mom and dad do that, right? It's normal. That's the world I want to live in. And so when you do that, all of a sudden the judgments, if they are coming your way, they don't stick. You're just like, you think I'm crazy. I think it's crazy to live unhealthy and not be able to stretch. You think it's crazy to wear these kind of clothes. Like, I want to live in a world where anyone can wear whatever they want. You think it's crazy for me to leave this job and pursue something else that's more exciting to me? Like, I want to live in a world where people have the courage and the boldness to do that. And so I'm creating that world right now. So you're not trying to accommodate other people. You're not trying to be part tethered to the herd. You're being a front runner. You're being a pioneer. You're being a leader. Then not only does that get you better results in your life, but it actually feels really freaking good. And you don't care as much what other people think. So apply that in your life. Let me know how it goes. Come join our confidence warriors Facebook group down below and share about your experience. Maybe even post a video of you doing something. Being a front runner. I love watching that kind of stuff. Alright, until we speak again, we have the courage to be who you are and to know on a deep level that you're awesome. Be well.
