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Dr. Aziz breaks down how "yes, but" thinking sabotages your confidence. When you list reasons why something won't work, you're usually hiding fear underneath. Notice the pattern, name what you're actually afraid of, and push through it anyway.
Dr. Aziz breaks down how "yes, but" thinking sabotages your confidence. When you list reasons why something won't work, you're usually hiding fear underneath. Notice the pattern, name what you're actually afraid of, and push through it anyway.
Are you killing your confidence without even knowing it? Unfortunately, the answer is probably yes, because there are many things that we do subconsciously, without even being aware of it, that have a significant effect on our confidence. In fact, I'm going to share four over the course of the next video, a four part series of sneaky confidence killers. These are things that you and I do without even knowing it, and they tend to reduce our confidence over time. And here's the thing, if you add up enough of these things, we just don't have the confidence that we need to face challenges, to step up, to grow, to create what we want. And we think that there's something wrong with us. We think that there's some deficit, some major problem. And actually it's just a bad habit of stacking a lot of these sneaky confidence killers, which is fantastic news, because when you see these things and you become aware of them, you can instantly change these patterns. So are you ready? Let's talk about the first step, sneaky confidence killer in this video. Number one, which is yes, but. Yes, but. So here's the thing. You have a sense of what you'd like to be able to do in your life if you had unlimited, unstoppable confidence. What would you go after? What would you do? What would you create? I love asking this question. I not only ask this question to potential clients and people at my workshops, but I'll ask it to someone on the airplane. Although right now I'm not sitting on any airplanes near anybody. But, you know, I love talking about this with people. And everyone's got a vision, or if you dig it out of them, they have a vision of how they want to be, how they want to be free. And then they'll say, yeah, but. And then they'll give you an extended reason or set of reasons as to why that's not possible, why they can't do it, what's getting in the way, what's stopping them, why it will never work. And this is us arguing for our own limitations. Yes, but. And we'll go so far as to fight for these things. I was just talking to someone earlier today, and she had this big vision for her company, what she wanted to create, what she wanted to do. She had to pivot things, given everything that's happening within the pandemic in the world. And so we were exploring ways that she could shift, ways that she could pivot. And every single idea that she had or I had, he's like, yeah, but. Yeah, but. And do you know what's Underneath those yes, buts, it's just one thing. It's fear. That's it. And any story or very complicated rational reason that you have as to why it's physically or financially or medically impossible is actually just fear underneath. Because the truth is, if there's a will, there's a way. If you want to create something, you will get creative. If you want to make something happen, you will get resourceful, you will find a way. And the only reason we say yes, but is if we didn't say yes, but then we'd have to go do the thing, then we'd have to make those phone calls, then we'd have to get into connection with people, then we'd have to put ourselves out there, then we'd have to fail, then we'd have to get rejected, then we'd have to hear no, then we'd have to feel disappointed along the way to our goals, to our what we really want to create. And so we stay in yes but and yes but sneakily is killing your confidence. So when you notice yourself saying that, you might literally say yes but or you might just have reasons that come up. And when you do that, I want you to call it out and say, ah, yes, but yes but. Ah, there's another yes but. You can make it like its own word. A yes, but a oh look, it's another yes but. And you could sound like you're from the earliest 20th century or something. Good day, sir. How are your yes buts? So what you want to do is you want to catch those, you want to identify it, and then you want to start to shift that and say, okay, what's the fear underneath? What am I really afraid of? What's this BS story I'm telling myself? And now how do I go confront that fear, which is courage, which we'll be talking about in future videos. So share down below what you're finding most valuable from this particular session around sneaky confidence killers. This is number one. I'll be sharing three more over the coming weeks to follow. So thank you again and click down below and not only share your comments, but also give it a thumbs up and subscribe if you want more of these videos. Because the more you study this stuff, the more you identify these sneaky confidence killers and everything else that I'm sharing in these YouTube videos, the more free you'll become, the more confident you'll become. And that's what I want. I want a more confident world. I want a world where you are are more free, more boldly yourself, more unapologetically, expressively you. Because the more that you are you, the more that we all benefit. Thanks for being with me until we speak again. May have the courage to be who you are and to know on a deep level that you're awesome.
