A short spoken piece by Dr. Aziz arguing that being excessively "nice" undermines trust because overly pleasing people often avoid telling unpleasant truths. He claims this inability to speak directly (about breakups, work disagreements, needed changes) makes them unreliable and harms relationships.
The number one problem with overly nice people, and trust me, I say this as someone who lived many years as a very, very nice person, is this. You can't trust them. Now, I know that might be an arrow through your heart if you're a very nice person, but here's why. Because if someone's really, really nice, which means they're very, very pleasing, then they cannot tell you what's directly true if it might upset you. And so the nice person reassures their partner that they secretly want to break up with. No, I'm not going anywhere. I love you forever. At work, someone says, hey, is there a problem here? Do you disagree? No, no, I don't disagree. And then their behavior shows otherwise, and then aggressive because they can't say directly. I disagree. They can't say directly. Yeah, this doesn't work for me. We need to make a change in relationship. It's gonna be over for me, so watch out. If you're being overly nice, you ultimately might not be trustworthy, which ultimately might not lead to having great relationships in your life.
