A short monologue by Dr. Aziz explaining a counterintuitive psychological strategy to increase others' liking: soothe and meet your own needy/desperate part instead of pressuring others for approval. By reducing visible neediness, you remove an invisible pressure that pushes people away, which paradoxically increases likability.
Here's the number one secret to make people like you. And when you hear this, you might get a little frustrated with me, but I'm just the messenger. I'm just sharing what is true in working with thousands of clients that when you hunger, you need that person to like you. What you're doing is you're psychologically putting a form of pressure on them. It's invisible, but it's very palpable. People feel it. And people don't like that pressure. They want to move away from that. So the secret to make them like you is to actually find the part of you that's desperate and hungry and needy and actually find a way to meet that part's needs, like comfort that part. Super soothe that part, be with that part of yourself. I can be with this. I might want something from them, but I'll be okay, even if they don't like. And then paradoxically, when you let go of that psychic pressure on them, it makes people like you way more.
