Dr. Aziz teaches a technique to stop seeking approval from specific people. You breathe, visualize someone you want approval from, and repeat "I don't need anything from you" until the tightness in your body releases. The practice works for dates, bosses, partners, and anyone else you're trying to impress.
Are you hooked on other people's approval? Anxious about what someone's going to think of you? If so, watch this video because I'm going to share a simple, powerful reminder phrase that you can say in your own mind repeatedly, like a mantra that will help you let that go. You ready? Alright. By the way, if you're benefiting from these videos, make sure you click down below the subscribe button, the little bell notifications. You can see them as they come out. The more you watch these videos, the more you're going to benefit. And, and you're gonna build your confidence which is gonna make your life better as well as everyone around you. And speaking of making your life better and those around you. Letting go of approval seeking. When you are in approval seeking mode, I need you to like me. I need you to think positively. It not only makes you feel bad and anxious and brings out not your best version of you, it also negatively impacts others. Because you're being less direct, you're being less real, you're being more disingenuous. Honestly, even if it doesn't feel that way. You're like, I'm trying to be myself. But you're not because you're filtering yourself, you're altering yourself, you're hiding yourself. You're doing whatever you need to, you're pretending in order to get the person to like you. You know what you're really doing is you're attempting to control them. It might not look like that because you're like, oh no, I'm trying to give them things and be nice to them. Why? Because I need to control their thoughts. I need to control their feelings to make sure that they're positive thoughts towards me and they're positive feelings only. So how do you deal with this? Well, that's a bigger topic of something that I teach on this channel, on my podcast. If you're not familiar with my podcast Drink for the Shy Guy as well as my books and programs and all that stuff. But I wanna give you a simple mantra today that's really gonna help you. And you wanna take it further, check out my other materials. So here's what you do. I want you to think about a person right now in your life that you tend to get a little graspy about their approval. Maybe it's a boss or a love interest or a partner or a parent, some authority figure, maybe a friend, maybe even just a colleague. Someone where you feel a little tense. You want them to see you positively. You don't want them to be upset with you. I want you to think of that person right now. Really imagine them notice. Do you feel any tightness or tension or squeezing? And if so, breathe. Like, literally breathe more oxygen into your body. Fill up your belly, fill up your lungs, and see if you can just let go a little bit. And then as you do, say this in your mind, I don't need anything from you. And as you say that, you might feel a little more contraction. Like, no, I do need something. Right. Okay. What's happening is there's this tightening. There's an illusion that you know they're the source of something. They're the source of safety or love in life. And without them, you'll never be safe again. You'll never have love without this person. Right. It's not true. That's a distorted, limited perspective. There's a million other perspectives. There's a million other truths. There's a million other opportunities for love, connection, safety, everything you could ever need. So we're just snapping. It's like breaking the spell. Hypnosis. Try it again. Focus on that person, softening your body as much as you can and reminding yourself of the truth. I don't need anything from you. And really letting yourself unbind them from whatever invisible chains you're trying to hold them to and trying to control their thoughts and their feelings and their opinions and everything. And just, I don't need to do that anymore. You could even say that. You could put your hands out to the side and say, I don't need to do that anymore. Hooray, Hallelujah, I'm free. So practice this. This is the kind of thing that you don't just say at once and you're like, I'm done. Right? You really want to get into a slow state. Breathe. You can practice after this video is over. Take five minutes. The key is to really focus on your body. Notice where there's tension and just invite yourself to let go, even if it's just 2 or 3% more. And the reminding is helping you to do that, letting go. And the reminding phrase is, I don't need anything from you. And just notice how liberating that feels, not just for you, but for them. Imagine on a date, it's like, I don't need something from you. I don't need you to like me. I don't need you to approve everything I say. I don't need you to want to have sex with me. I don't need you to do whatever it is. Want to be my partner, want to have kids with me or whatever. Pressure we're putting on the other person. It's like, I don't need anything from you. And then, wow, you can just find out who is this person. Same thing for a boss, same thing for a friend, same thing for a colleague. And it doesn't mean that you don't care about that person. You don't want to stay connected. Let's say it's your partner or one of your kids or something. You're like, I don't need anything from you, get away from me. Right? It's like, no, of course I'm in partnership with this person. I love this person. We're going to be in each other's lives, but just in this moment, I don't need to control what you think and feel. That's what we're letting go of. Not the caring, not the connection. And as you let that go, there is more opportunity for care, connection, love, contribution, everything beautiful that you really want in your life. So share down below in the comments what you're finding most valuable. If you want to take this further, I highly recommend my program, Confidence University. You can find out in the description below about that and get access to that. There's multiple courses. It's an amazing life changing home study course. So check out Confidence University University and until we speak again, may have the courage to be who you are and to know on a deep level that you're awesome.
