Who Are You Going To BE This Year? (Brand New 2018 Confidence Tips!) | Dr. Aziz - Confidence Coach

Do you want 2018 to be an extraordinary year for you? Do you want it to be a year where you're able to do more of what you want, achieve more of what you want, and most importantly, experience life as you want to experience it, not have it be a repeat of the year previous or all the years before that, and truly show up in a way that is fulfilling to you in your life, that's confident and you living life on your terms? If so, I want to share one secret with you in today's episode that's going to help you actually be able to do that. So stay tuned and watch this. Welcome to another episode of the Art of Extraordinary Confidence. I'm your host, Dr. Aziz, and I'm excited to be with you here at the end of 2017. And I also am excited to share something with you that I think you're going to find very valuable. And a lot of people, as it gets to the new year, have resolutions, have a lot of things they want to achieve, goals they come up with, I'm going to do this every day. I'm going to do that every day. I want to make sure I get this by this time. And maybe you're doing that, and maybe that's great. Now, I know there's a lot of statistics about how most people don't keep their resolutions, and maybe you've fallen into that camp yourself. I know I have at times, and that's why I want to share something pretty different in this video. It's going to help you make 2018 what you want, but in a way that's going to be more sustainable, more likely to help you get there. And. And that's ultimately going to be, I think, much more impactful, and it does involve goals at all. So here's what I mean. What happens to you in life, the things you achieve, the opportunities that come your way, are not a result of external forces and the whims of fate. They are a reflection of who you are and how you show up. All the good things that you want in your life, all the things you want to achieve and create, are going to come based upon who you are and how you show up in the world. And if you show up in a powerful way, in a bold way, in an authentic way, in a heartfelt way, in a genuine way, then better things will happen. More people will want to talk with you and be your friend. More people want to date you and spend time with you. Someone might actually want to marry you or have sex with you or whatever it is that we want to have some connection around or grow and obviously dating relationships, but maybe in your career and business as well, all of that's going to come from who you are. So instead of focusing on what do I want to get and when am I going to get there and setting up a bunch of more smart goals, let's talk about who you are and how you're going to show up in 2018. Now, for some of you listening to this, you might not even realize that you can decide that you might have forgotten, you might have been brainwashed, you may have been brainwashed yourself into thinking that that's set, that that's just. Well, who I am is just who I am. It's who I've been really. I guess it's just the same thing, just me, here I am. And you don't realize that you have the power to change that, to change how you show up, to change who you are. And I don't mean in some weird way where you have to not be you. I mean be more of you. Eliminate all the stuff that you do that's not you like people pleasing and ah, you gonna like me. And then holding back and saying, oh, I'm so scared, please, but I want connection, but I'm too scared. That's not you. You know who you is? The one who walks up and says, hey, how's it going? I want to talk with you. Or if you don't want to talk to anyone in that moment, it's the one that's like, no thanks, I gotta go, see you later. Right? To be able to say no or to say yes, but to do so powerfully and fully, that is you. Not all the stuff that we do to people, please. And get others to like us. So the question I have for you is in order to achieve all the things that you want in your relationship, in your career, in any area of your life that you want confidence for, who do you need to be and how do you need to show up? That's the question that you want to ask yourself. You might even want to like, think about that and journal about it or go on a long walk and actually reflect on that in order to get those results in life. Who would I need to be? What kind of person would I need to be? And how would I need to show up in all those areas of my life? How would I need to show up in my social life or on a date? Or how would I need to show up in a business meeting or in a conversation with a colleague or a Conversation with someone who's at a position higher than me or potentially can invest in my company or whatever it is. Who do I need to be and how do I need to show up? You want to start to think about that and eliminate the idea that says, well, it doesn't matter. There's no reason to even think about this because I could never get there. That's a story that you want to just push out of the way and keep exploring and say, what? How would I need to show up? And that's hard. If that negative identity says, you can't do that, you can't do that. You'll never be able to do that. Here's how to bypass that. Just say, okay, okay. All right, all right, Safety police. I hear you. Now, how about a hypothetical other person? How would someone. Not me, how would someone need to show up in their work, in their dating life, in order to be able to do what it is that I want to do and brainstorm that way? It's the same stuff, right? It's just a way of bypassing your own negative identity. And. And then you can start to see, well, they would need to show up this way. They would need to be outgoing, they would need to be able to start conversations. They would need to look people in the eye, they would need to like themselves. They would need to think this about themselves. Then you start thinking about, well, that's how I need to show up. Now. That is the first step, right? We need to really brainstorm and mind map. How is it that I need to show up? Next step, show up that way. Now I can already see the comments saying, well, dude, come on. Easier said than done, man. Well, look, no, it's the story that you have that you cannot change that actually is stopping you. You can reinvent yourself fast. You can shift, you can be different. And the reason that we don't is not because we're not capable. It's because it's uncomfortable. That's the only thing that stops us is the invisible force field, gravity of discomfort. I don't want to feel uncomfortable. Watch this. Let me show you exactly what I mean right now. Can you do something outrageous with your face and your body that you've never done before? Like, never in your life can you do that? Right now, in this moment, is that possible? Yes or no? Not, do you want to, or would you feel comfortable doing it? Or would someone judge me if I did that? So I don't want to. None of that. Just straight up yes or no, is it possible if you Wanted to do something with your face and your gestures and your sounds in your body that you've never done before in your entire life. Is that possible? The answer is yes. Now, here's the acid test. Would you like to do that with me right now? Would you? So this is how we go beyond theoretical. It's possible to change, but I don't. I can't. Remember, we strip all that BS away, and the truth is, yes, you can. The only thing that stops us is fear. And fear of what? Fear of discomfort. Fear of some emotional discomfort. Someone judging me, me judging myself. A bad outcome. A rejection. Right. Well, guess how we overcome that shit? We face it head on. And what if you decided in 2018 that you were going to do whatever was uncomfortable because it's going to get you what you want. Do what scares you in the service of something greater. Do what scares you until fear has no power to stop you from doing whatever you want in your life. So you can create the results that you want. You. And you could be the person that you're meant to be. So in the spirit of that, what if we kicked off 2018 a couple days early by doing something ridiculous and being uncomfortable? You ready? So stand up. Or not. I don't know what gesture you're going to make, but on the count of three, let's do something we've never done before. Now, you don't have to get too technical about this. Maybe you have done it before. I don't know. Something random, weird and crazy that you've probably never done before. Now, I'm going to do this without thinking about it too much because that. That defeats the point. So, ready? Here we go. On the count of three. Ready? One, two, three. I had an element of Zoidberg from Futurama. I could safely say that I've never done that particular gesture sound combo in my entire life. You've just witnessed history being made. But you know what? Maybe you didn't even witness it because you were doing your own wacky shit combo. Now, here's the thing. If you just sat there and watched me do that, this is what I'm talking about. This unwillingness to be uncomfortable is the very thing that's stopping you. So if you did, I would encourage you to rewind, go through that part again, and just do it. And if you're like, I don't know, you're on a bus right now and you don't want to do it, then when you're home, do it. Then later on, a couple months into 2018, you can do it on a bus and by then you'll be embarrassment inoculation city. So use this. Apply this in your life. Do what makes you uncomfortable in 2018. Reinvent yourself and show up the way that you need to show up in order to get the results that you want. And I can't wait to hear about it. Thank you so much for being on this journey with me in 2017 and before however long you've been with me and we've been growing together. I can't wait for 2018 and many more years to come. So until we speak again, may have the courage to be who you are and to know on a deep level that you're awesome. I'll talk to you soon.