You Will Be Disliked...And That's Good!

You will be disliked. And that's a good thing, right? Right? Is it? Well, actually, in this video, you're going to discover that it actually is a good thing. And it can be something that you can actually feel at peace about and not have to run your entire life running away from that. Posturing, managing, controlling, hiding, hesitating, hoping, fearing this. Oh, my gosh, what if someone dislikes me? Do they dislike me? Does this person dislike me? What if they're upset with me? Is that person upset with me? They get upset with me and you're just running ragged. You're stressed out. Whether it's work, I know people that are constantly afraid if someone's going to be judging them and thinking they're not good enough, or a client's going to be upset with them, or even their close relationships, their friendships, their lover, their partner, their family. They're like, oh, is someone upset with me? Or what does mom think? And what does that friend think? And someone may be upset, someone might not be upset. If you're living this way, to you, it's in your nervous system. It's all the same. It's all threat and danger and fear and stress. And it doesn't have to be this way. So how do you shift it? That's what I want to talk about in this video. And if you want to take it even further, I'll share at the end how to take it further through my flagship course called Confidence University, where you learn, step by step, how to build unstoppable confidence so that what other people think you doesn't phase you at all anymore, and you can just be you in every single area of your life. But how do we shift this pattern around being disliked? So let's break it down. Is there anything, any object, any tangible or intangible thing in the world, whether we're talking about a printer or a song created by someone, or a mountain or a dinner, a fried okra dish, right? Anything, a human, anything that exists that every single person on the planet agrees that they like it. Is there anything? Is there anything? The answer is no, because everyone has got a different perspective. And even if there was something that everybody liked, there would be a subgroup of people that say, you know what? Everybody likes it. I used to like it too, but now, because everybody likes it, I got to dislike it and they got to feel, well, I'm special and I'm different, so I dislike it. There is no way that everybody is going to like the one thing. Even you, even me. Shocking, right? There are people that Dislike you and me. What is wrong with them? And so it is a fact of life. It's like death and taxes. Like they're gonna happen. It is a hundred percent unavoidable. At some point, someone is gonna dislike you. And the dislike might be they're irritated with you, they judge you, they want you to do something that you're not doing. And now they're frustrated or they're disappointed or they're hurt or they're blaming you. Maybe that means they want to never see you again. Maybe not. You know, if it's a friend or a partner, you know, maybe it means there's a little conflict and you work through it. But whatever it is, it's going to occur. Let's face that right now. Because as long as you're trying to manage your life so that doesn't happen. That's like trying to manage your life so you never die. No matter what you do, no matter how healthy you are, no matter how great care you take of your health, you're gonna die. And it's the same thing. No matter how nice you are, no matter how pleasing you are, no matter how accommodating you are, people are gonna be upset with you sometimes. They're gonna dislike you sometimes. So there's two things to do with that hard fact of life, right? One is to live in constant fear and try to be so nice to everybody that no one can ever be upset with you, even though they will anyway. Okay, that option, give me a thumbs up or a thumbs down on that one, right? Like, sucks. You've probably done that for a long time. So what's the alternative? The alternative is to embrace it and to see, you know what? Yes, people are going to be upset with me. No, that doesn't have to be a threat to my nervous system, is to adapt to it. And here's one little technique that I've used to adapt to it. And I had to do this because as my world grew and I started to interact with more team members and more clients and more people through the Internet, Internet, you know, you put yourself out in the world to a larger audience and there's going to be some. There's going to be some, let's just say some heat on some of the feedback. And I used to be so sensitive to it, like, oh my God, this person's upset with me. And they don't. Now I got to explain and try to convince them to like me. And it was just this mess. I was like, okay, I got to upgrade this. And the way that I did it, I said, you know what? I'm going to give myself a dislike quota. That means at any given time, there are three people who are upset with me right now who are disliking me at any given time. And those are people that are close to me. I don't know about someone on the Internet. There's probably hundreds of people that don't like me, maybe even thousands. Hmm. Anyway, so what does that mean? Well, maybe I got a client that's upset with me because they wanted something and they didn't get it. Maybe my son is mad at me because I didn't wrestle with him in the morning. Or maybe. And when I say mad, it doesn't mean they're like enraged. They might just be a little disappointed, a little bit upset. But doesn't that little bit of upset bother you and scare you and make you feel guilty and anxious? Right. So what if we say, you know what, at any given time it's to be expected. And then what happens if you imagine someone's upset with you or you find out, you know, they give you a snarky comment and instead of saying like, oh, no, something has gone terribly wrong, there's one human that's upset with me or disappointed me in some way, you say, okay, yeah, I got a quota for that. That's my one. There's probably at least two others right now. And what does that do? That helps your nervous system respond to it as if it's not a threat and it really isn't. And that, that is where true liberation lies, is when you really get on a deep level that it's okay you, as you watch this could be liking or disliking me or something about me or something about the way that I'm saying it, or something about the way my face looks or what I'm wearing. And that's okay. It doesn't impact me. It's not a threat to me. And even if we were best friends or it was my wife or something and she was upset with me, that is uncomfortable. But it's also not a danger. It's not like I'm in harm, harm's way. It's just something to work through, something for us to navigate. In fact, it's an inevitable part of life. And if you want to take this one step further, as I mentioned earlier, Definitely go to TheConfidenceUniversity.com you can find a link down to it below. You can also go to drzeze.com and product section. There's that page. If this is where you really want to take this stuff that you're learning in this YouTube channel and make it a permanent shift in your confidence, that's the proven pathway to do it. So take that next step when you're ready and until we speak again, may have the courage to be who you are and to know on a deep level that you're awesome. I'll talk to you soon.