You're Going To Fail!

You are going to fail. Yeah, you. Now this is a helpful video. Stick with me. I know that might not seem that way, but it actually is one of the most beneficial things that you can really see about your life, about yourself. We're going to discuss how and why in today's episode. Welcome to another episode of the Art of Extraordinary Confidence. This is a show for you if you want to maximize your confidence and fail more. Yeah, that's right. So here's the thing. Nobody likes failing, nobody likes getting rejected. Nobody likes making mistakes, looking bad, having an awkward interaction, whatever, I get it. And that unwillingness to fail, that aversion to failure, that avoidance of failure cripples your confidence. It destroys your self esteem. Because what you do is to avoid failure, avoid making a mistake, avoid rejection, all that stuff, you don't take action. That's the only way, right? Do I want to ask that person out? Well, I could get rejected. So I won't. Now I didn't. Now I didn't fail, but I also didn't get a date. I could speak up with this colleague or I could raise my hand to take on that leadership position at work or whatever, but I might fail. It might not go well. They might not like what I said. So I won't say anything. Sit here quietly, look busy, taking notes. And now I missed out on an opportunity to grow in my career, an opportunity to advance, an opportunity to progress to the next level and maybe earn more, get more recognition, have more autonomy, whatever it is that you want as you accelerate in your career. So we miss out on what we really want and we also get to dodge failure. Now you might already know this. You might be preaching to the choir. If you watched any of my videos and have been subscribed to my channel for a while, do that now, click subscribe and the bell and you'll watch all of these. You become a powerhouse, just like subtly influencing you to become the most badass, confident version of you by subscribing now. So you might already know this, but here's the thing I've discovered and this came up, actually, one of my team members who does a lot of help with me around Confidence University says, you know, I've noticed a slightly alarming trend in all the participants of Confidence University. And I said, yes, alarming trend, go on. He said, well, there seems to be this feeling in the comments that I'm getting the sentiment that I try. I did the exercise, I did the action step and it didn't go well. Like what? Wtf? Now what? And it's like, oh, interesting. So on some level, they're expecting it to go great. I was like, uh, oh, I'm talking more about failure in there. And. And tell them they're gonna fail. And so I was like, I need to tell everyone this. Everyone's gonna fail. Because here's the thing. Whatever it is that you want, you wanna have a better dating life. You wanna have whatever you want your confidence for. You wanna be better conversationalist, connect more, have more friends, be more assertive, whatever. When you start to do the thing, face the thing that's uncomfortable for you, you're gonna fail at it. You're gonna make mistakes at it. If you've been avoiding your dating life for months or years or decades, and then you just start to go out there and put yourself out there, do you think that people are just going to throw themselves at you? I know it sounds ridiculous when I say that, but on some level we do think that we expect that. And when that doesn't happen, you can tell that you were expecting that because you get pissed off or you get sad or you hate yourself, or you get frustrated or you get overwhelmed, like, oh, my God, hopeless and helpless. It's not never gonna work out. How many times did you try? 3. It's never gonna work out. Right? We get all discouraged and desperate about it because on some level we're saying it's supposed to go perfect. I'm not supposed to fail. I'm not supposed to experience mistakes. If I was just this, if I was just smarter and suaver and knew what to say and this and that, then I would never get rejected. That's the unconscious story we have, and we gotta let that go. No matter how awesome you are, no matter how suave you are, no matter what you look like, you're going to get rejected. You're going to fail. You're going to make mistakes, you're going to have bad days, you're going to have off days, you're going to have unproductive days, you're going to say stupid things, you're going to make jokes that no one laughs at. That's you. That's. Even the best version of you is going to do that. So we need to accept that, and we need to start to move into those failures with more regularity. Again and again and again. So don't stop at 1. Anticipate failure and repeat it. Learn from it and do it again. Learn from it and do it again. Learn from it and do it again. Now, again. This is one of those things that you might intellectually already know. You might be hearing me and saying, well, I already know this. Well, are you doing it? Are you living it? When's the last time you did something, took a risk and failed? If it was not in the last week, then we might want to look at something there. You might want to increase your failure rate by taking action more. Awesome. Thanks for being with me today. Share below in the comments what you're learning from this video, what you're finding most valuable and questions you have, and until we speak again, may have the courage to be who you are and to know on a deep level that you're awesome. Talk to you soon.