Elizabeth Stone explains why you keep waiting for disaster in a new relationship. The fix isn't the relationship itself but how you handle doubt: notice the thought, do nothing, let it pass like a cloud. Repeat until the anxiety loses its grip.
Hi, I'm Elizabeth Stone, and here's today's question. I have struggled with attracting the wrong people for a long time. Thank God that phase seems to be over. Happy for you. However, I am in a relationship with someone who is committed and devoted to me, but instead of enjoying and accepting it, deep down I wonder, is there a catch? And I try to squash it when it creeps up, but it's lurking somewhere. How do I overcome it? This is a good question. I really like questions about upsetting thoughts because they dissolve easily when you look straight at them and deny that they have anything to do with reality. So here's how I do this. When you think that thought— for you, it's something like, is there a catch? And maybe, is this a good situation really happening?— first notice that you're thinking those thoughts. Then don't do anything. I mean that. Nothing. Just notice them. Then notice as you think a new thought. You see, it's not the actual thought that is a problem. It's that you're worried the thought is true and then start imagining and catastrophizing about the consequences. It's thinking the thought is a problem, which is the actual problem. Let the thought go and it will change like the clouds in the sky. Resist them and the unwanted thoughts Will keep coming, and they will attract more thoughts just like them. But if you stop right when you notice a negative thought like this and deny that it has anything to do with anything, it's just imagination, you can easily get free from it. And like, maybe not forever, but long enough to regroup. And then if the thought comes back, do it again. Pretty soon, accepting the reality you're living in will be much easier. But thoughts like this get to be a habit, but only if you keep doing some combination of believing in them and resisting. So now go out and enjoy your new relationship, please. All right, please like and subscribe to the channel. It really helps the channel to grow. If you're interested in getting my help with your situation, I offer one-on-one coaching. Go to my website and click the coaching tab at the top of the page, and you will see your options and how to book. Also, while you're there, you can sign up for my 2 master classes, The 7 Blocks to Manifesting Love and 3 Innocent Mistakes Women Make with Men for free. I will talk to you next time. I'm Elizabeth Stone. Have a great day.
Why He Tells You To Stay Away From Other Guys (And Why You Do Not Have To Accept It)
