In this YouTube video, relationship coach Elizabeth Stone answers a viewer’s question about a woman in her 50s whose long‑term partner of nearly eight years has told her she is no longer in love but continues to live with her as a lodger. Stone first acknowledges that the partner’s willingness to stay under the same roof is a modestly positive sign—it shows the relationship isn’t hostile and the ex‑partner isn’t compelled to leave immediately. She then warns that cohabitation can also hinder healing and that the situation is not automatically healthy. Stone points out common reasons why the love may have faded, such as loss of personal “mojo,” neglect of self‑care, and taking the partner for granted. She advises against pleading, trying to convince the ex‑partner, or ingratiating oneself, praising the asker for already avoiding those traps. The core recommendation is to rediscover the qualities that originally attracted the partner—physically, emotionally, and socially—by reclaiming one’s own confidence and happiness. Stone ends with a standard call‑to‑action, promoting her one‑on‑one coaching services and free masterclasses on manifesting love and avoiding common relationship mistakes.
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Hi, I'm Elizabeth Stone, and here's today's question. If someone who used to tell you that you were the biggest love of their life tells you that they aren't in love with you anymore, just shy of 8 years, then continues to live with you amicably as a lodger, is there any hope? Context, I've not tried to ingratiate or persuade myself with her. We are both females in our 50s. All right, so I'm a hopeful person. I have seen all kinds of relationships turn around, and first, it's a decently good sign that she's willing to stick around you with— as a lodger and a roommate. And all that means is that the sight of you isn't so annoying that she feels like she has to get away immediately. You're both acting kind toward each other. This is positive. But of course, that doesn't mean that it's necessarily a good idea to keep living together. But next, there were strong past feelings. The flip side is that both of you are there under each other's noses. Your ex doesn't have to accept your loss at all because she's right there watching you every day. There's no mystery. Also, usually to get to this point of low interest and lack of passion, the person who asked me the question, you, usually has lost your— their mojo in some way. You might have let yourself go, either physically or emotionally. You might have stopped doing things that make you happy separately from the relationship. You might have taken her for granted and imagined that her feelings about you could have never changed. Now, you might have done all or none of these things. I don't know what it is for you in particular without hearing a lot more, but usually what works to attract someone back is the Opposite of most people's base instincts. Usually people think that leaning into the relationship and trying harder with their ex is the answer, and usually once it's gotten to this point, then that's not very helpful. So well done avoiding that. It says that you didn't try to convince her or change her mind or ingratiate yourself to her, so excellent. And since you don't have to clean that up, your next step is to remember who the heck you were when she fell in love with you in the first place. Then go out and regain your lost mojo. So best of luck out there. Keep me posted on how it goes. And before you go, please like and subscribe. It really helps the channel to grow so I can reach more people. If you're interested in getting my help with your situation, I offer one-on-one coaching. To book private coaching with me, please go to my website and hit the coaching link at the top of the page and book your one-on-one session with me. While you're there, you can also visit the training page and sign up for my 2 masterclasses for free, the 7 Blocks to Manifesting Love and the 3 Innocent Mistakes women make with men. Until next time, I'm Elizabeth Stone, and I'll talk to you soon.
