Relationship Advice | How to Have the Best Sex for Years to Come

because the more detailed you become, the more you hit your own target in relationship to what it is you really desire, right? Said at the beginning, our desire is our own responsibility. How could she ever figure all that out, right? You could barely figure it out. We could barely figure it out. Like, it's— we, we are complex, and it's changing every moment, because the things you love now, next month, will they still be true? That's why this art form is so critical. Because we're learning the skill that will allow you to adapt to your changing desires month after month, year after year, because they don't stay the same. So it's not something we tell our partner once, we figure out once. This is an ongoing exploration. So for some, that sounds like a daunting task, but what it unlocks in intimacy is your sex is infinite. The experience of after 15 years, not for one moment being bored during sex. Like, whoa, to have lovemaking be so ecstatic. And that's possible. That's what we create. And it gets created by exactly what you're noticing about yourself right now, that specificity. And so one thing that I want to give you, but also for everyone in this group, that level of hyper-specificity is the greatest gift to unlocking your deepest desire. And the more specific and exact you become, the more you must balance it with patience and compassion for your partner. If we only develop that hyper-specificity and it isn't accompanied by compassion and patience, it can be a very harsh aspect about us. We get clingy, craving about our desire. We notice because it'll create a sense of agitation. That's when we've gone too far. So just know, as you continue to sharpen and refine, that's exactly what you want to do. But every refinement has to be matched with compassion Attention, patience, equanimity. That's how we really master this art form as fire keepers.