You’re One Video Away From a Six-Figure Opportunity

I've never been a camera person. My whole life I hated taking photos. I hated the way I looked in photos.

Put the camera up to you, you immediately slap my phone out my hand like you were gonna melt or something.

You know, most girls growing up, they're like selfie queens and things like that. That was not me.

I see that you consume so much greatness, so much high-quality content. I see a lot of people who look up to you or don't even know you exist yet that would look up to you because one, you're beautiful. Two, you're smart. You were a professor. You mean you have your master's degree. You were going to be a surgeon at some point, thinking about it. I mean, you have such high quality. Now you're a business owner. There's so many young women or older women that would look up and say, damn, that girl's doing it.

I may be cringe to a certain population, what happened, but not cringe to—

what kind of goal do you have to put in front of you in order to realize not only do I want to do this, I need to do this, to I can do this?

I am only making this content for people that matter.

I'm going to drop a nugget on you guys. This is probably a big secret that would make you multiple hundreds of thousands of dollars in a year, you know, is that you So you've had the issue, and I don't want to say issue, but you've had the hesitation on stepping in the camera. From the time that we've met, you did not like the camera. I would— yeah, I put the camera up to you, you would immediately block it, put your hat down, slap my phone out my hand.

Yeah.

And you were just so anti-camera, like, like you were gonna melt or something, or you were a wanted criminal and you didn't want no one know who you were. Yeah, and looking back at how you were to you making your first video, what happened? What made that change?

I've had to get out of my own way, most importantly. I've never been a camera person my whole life. I hated taking photos. I hated the way I looked in photos. I just probably never took enough photos to to know my angles, know what I like, knew how to smile. Like, that's why I'm still kind of awkward or derpy in pictures, because I don't practice those things. You know, most girls growing up, they're like selfie queens and things like that. That was not me. I don't even have a lot of photos growing up because I just hated the camera. Yeah, so I've never been huge on social media. I had social media, but I've never posted a lot of pictures of myself. And I noticed when I, you know, wanted to start branding and becoming my own business, you know, facts tell but stories tell. People want to know the real me, and I couldn't do that by just putting facts online about what I'm selling. And I think that's what inclined me to the shift, and it took a long time. And I think a lot of people out there can relate to that, that If you're not used to being on camera, whether it's photos or videos, it takes a lot to get out of your own way, to get out of your own head and shift that perspective and kind of just go with it. You know, it sounds so easy, just go with it, just take the photos, just get the practice in. But taking the photos and seeing yourself and have to repeatedly do that, and then I get stressed even still thinking about it. I'm still trying to get out of my own way.

But I just find that curious because there's a lot of people who take pictures, who do videos, who should probably not be doing videos. But who am I to say that? There's some people who they know that their stuff don't stank. They know that they are the boss chick, like you can't tell them nothing. They look flawless.

I admire that confidence.

And it's crazy to say that most people who look at you would just say that you're gorgeous. They would say that you must be a model. They will say that you have the perfect face, you have the perfect— just everything about you.

You got the love goggles on.

Yeah, no, not me. I'm just saying that's what the normal general— the general public would say when it comes to somebody who is online, who's on social media, who's an influencer, who does actual content. And I've always found it very interesting that somebody— and I'm so used to the gym world and girls always doing the selfies and their workouts and always so on it about social media. They may not know why they're posting. Maybe it's just for vanity. Maybe it's just to validate themselves that they're actually in the gym, or maybe it's to say that I'm pretty, so I want everyone else to know that I'm pretty. So again, that validation. And I just find it interesting that, you know, watching your struggle on being in front of the camera to actually saying I'm going to be doing it, that transition on that mind, like it's easy to say, oh, just do it. But how do I just do it? How do I come in terms with myself and realizing that there's something that's limiting me from doing point A to point B? Maybe, you know, I don't want to post anything online because I'm just, I'm an introvert. I don't like the attention. But you would see a lot of introverts post because they don't have to actually talk to anyone. They're talking to the camera. Like it's just me and the camera here. I don't have to worry about anyone saying anything. I don't have to respond to the comments. I could just leave that alone, the likes, whatever. I just like to post to post. And there's some people who just, I can't do the camera at all. Like I see the camera like, ah, like, oh geez. Like what I guess the question is, what kind of goal do you have to put in front of you in order to realize not only do I want to do this, I need to do this. To I can do this?

I think the first thing is to just set a goal. So for me in the beginning, it was, okay, I'm gonna do one post this week or one post every other day. It was so long ago that I couldn't remember what systems I put in place, but I was like, okay, we're just gonna do baby steps. And I was like, let me just start with just the words. Let me just get— start with being comfortable putting things out there that aren't just me and my personal life, but me and business. So I first wanted to shift that perspective of my audience that this is another facet in my life. I'm no longer just hiding what I do because I don't have to advertise it. Now I have to advertise it and I want to slowly transition my audience so it's not just like straight business and I'm trying to sell you something. I wanted people to get a little comfortable with who I am and how I want to put myself online now. Of course, if you don't do that at all, your whole following is personal. Your whole following is just acquaintances and friends and family. So doing that was like the first big step because I didn't even have to get comfortable with my face or videos yet. I had to get comfortable with shifting that perspective of who I am to my audience. And doing that plus pictures of me and videos with someone who didn't even wanna put myself out there that way at all, I just don't like the attention, that was two big steps. So I had to start one at a time. So the first thing was like, let's just put words out there. It could be soft call to action, soft stuff on my business. Maybe just a sale I did. It doesn't have to be like, here's what I do, this is what I'm selling. It was just, oh, here's a win for me today in my business. And get people comfortable with seeing me have wins, that I'm really good at what I do. So I started with posting my sales here and there online, posting my wins, then posting a little bit about my business. And then slowly incorporated my face, videos. We're now getting, well, what we'll talk about a little later is long-form content, which is a huge step for me. I'm getting out of my own way with being hyper-focused on how I present myself online or what I'm saying. I just have to do it.

Yeah. So for you, the biggest change was it wasn't just about posting your everyday. I mean, you go on Facebook, Facebook was always known for family photos, current events, what's so-and-so doing from high school, how's their glow up, how's their downfall. It's always kind of like you're peeping Tom, you're like paying attention and like just the rumors, the gossip to see what's going on there. That was the social aspect of it. But now that you're realizing that social media is not just for social media, but it's actually for true marketing for a business and for your endeavors that you want. Now I feel like, or what I'm seeing is that since you've become a business owner, you've realized organic content credibility is huge.

100%.

In order to have that, you need to have content.

Yep. I have to have consistent content over a long period of time to show my credibility.

Mm-hmm. So that's— and I find that interesting because If you guys hear that, it's our dog choking. She has a collapsed trachea. She's 14 years old. So yeah, that's a thing.

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All right.

Now let's get back into the video.

So for the person that doesn't have a business and say that they're trying to get in front of the camera, trying to get comfortable with it, maybe that's not their goal. How do they— and you might not be able to speak on this because you don't have that— how do they come to terms to be able to post since you realize that in order for me to make more sales, get more trust, gain more credibility, I need to put myself out there? If they don't have that, what do they do?

Are you saying people that just want to post more videos of themselves and selfies online, but not necessarily business?

Yeah, maybe they want to get comfortable in front of the camera. Maybe they don't know what they want to sell yet. Maybe they know they just want to be online because they see their favorite person doing it and they're like, oh, I could do that, whatever that may be. If it's just talking the gospel of God or if it's preaching about a book that they read and they just wanted to talk about this book or something that they learned, something new, and they wanted to share it with somebody, but they're afraid to step on the camera.

Yeah, I think two things is, well, for me, I'm hyper-aware of how awkward I am. And that might be I'm awkward because I am hyper-aware. I don't know which one comes first. But I am hyper-aware that I'm awkward. So I think doing things repetitively reduces that awkwardness because I'm just like so in tune with what I'm doing that it makes me almost robotic and like just, I just look derpy a lot. I can't just relax my smile. So strained and anyways, hyperaware. And I think that repetition, so you don't even have to post things yet, just take videos of yourself, take selfies of yourself, store it in your phone and get comfortable with doing that action and seeing yourself because it's hard to just do that photo or that video then post it. I'm like, oh, that's so ugly, I'll store it away. But after doing that a lot and taking 100 shots, Pick one that you like, edit it, whatever it may be, just get yourself out there. And then also maybe mixing that with something you love. Like you said, you wanna talk about something you're passionate about, maybe post it like you're shopping at your favorite store, you just bought something like a juicer that you're so excited to use and post with that because then it's not just like, oh, here's my selfie. It's hey, look at like this really cool thing I'm into. And it takes a little less attention off of your face and yourself, and maybe people are paying attention to whatever product you're using, and maybe it will ease your anxiety on that. Yeah, if that makes sense.

That makes sense. And when you said product, that made me think about years ago when every day you spend an hour plus with your makeup, your routine, what you do, it's always just chef's kiss, perfect. Everyone always compliments you. Everyone asks, Oh, what eyeliner do you do? Oh, what mascara is that? Oh, what lip gloss?

And you—

and it's funny to me because I'm around you so much and I hear you spill off all of these products, all the knowledge.

I don't gatekeep at all.

Not at all. Who's the celebrity that's wearing it? Why you chose that brand? Like, you know so much about it. I'm like, why do you know that? And not just why, but when did you take the time to know that? So it's— there's women that don't wear makeup at all and they know nothing about it. But then there's women that have all of the knowledge about makeup that would help the women who want to know about makeup that don't know how to do makeup. Well, who do I learn from? Oh, I see this girl, Cassandra. Her makeup's always flawless. What does she use? And I've always stressed about— and maybe that's my problem there, as I said, stress, which puts stress on you.

You always wanted me to record my makeup.

I'm like, dude, you should do some content with that. You could do so much of your routine. Get ready with me. Today is this day. I got a meeting at 6, blah, blah, blah. So today we're going to use, uh, show the product. Get it on there.

See, pause. I'm already myself, I'm comfortable with my face now, I'm done up or whatever it may be, I feel like I'm presenting myself at my best, plus my product, my business, there's my shift off of my face, my attention. So that's where I'm comfortable at. But doing that whole routine of here's my makeup, doing my makeup on camera, I use the same 10 products every single day for like a decade, okay? I am— True to myself. So trying new products, trying new foundations, that's not in the books for me. I am through and through committed to my products. I don't navigate, I don't shift. When I do, I'm like full of regret. But that's already too much in the mix. I'm still on the beginning stages of being comfortable, but like I'm good at posting myself now and just like, it is what it is.

Yeah.

That's my photo, that's my face. That's my voice.

So do you think that for you in that instance, you already felt kind of insecure about your looks and already put this pressure on yourself on how you should present yourself on camera, that you didn't want yourself to be seen on camera without makeup, that it made you not even want to do that to begin with?

That definitely could be where it stems from because I like, I always make sure I put my best put forward. I just was raised that way. And maybe I'm like— I guess that was also part of why I just didn't post a lot online is because I always wanted to be perfect, which, you know, no one's always perfect. But that's the pressure I put on myself. And, you know, forcing myself to be online and post business things really made me get out of my own way and kind of accept that I'm not always going to be super perfect. Because not only I'm like, okay, I look decent, but what if I hate my voice? Some people hate their voice.

I—

it's not that I hate my voice, I just— I'm not used to hearing myself. So that was another— there's so many layers to it to get comfortable with. Because I see you, you've been recording yourself for what, 15 years, and you are just like, whip out the camera, you don't care what angle it has, you don't care if you have 10 nights of little sleep, eye bags, and you are just ranting off, boom boom post, and I'm like, God bless you, because couldn't be me. I will chop that thing up, I will put on the brightness or whatever it may be, put a filter on, put a filter on, and maybe not even post it at that.

And I think that's interesting because for me, for YouTube and videos and the pressure on editing, and not to get too far into this conversation, when you set that standard in the beginning, that's how you always feel like you need to present yourself at that time, all the time.

Yeah.

Your audience would feel that. If you always have all these edits, if you always have all your makeup on, you're always done up, and you've done this for so many videos, and then you come with that one video where you're just raw, people would be like, whoa.

Well, that's the thing too, like, I will always go to events, I'll always go out in makeup. So like, if I don't, then I feel like, okay, then it's a shift in my identity and not in a good way, at least for me.

But people like that, you know, sweatpants, hair tied, chilling with no makeup on, you know, Drake.

We'll keep that for the home. Okay, fair enough. Maybe one day they'll get a get ready with me, but not today.

So you have to be dolled up in order to feel the confidence in order to move forward within making your content.

You have to control the controllables. Key facts of life: control the controllables.

Fair enough.

Let go a little bit, but control the controllables.

So everybody has their own little thing that they have to make sure is completely done before they can hit the record button.

Yeah, and some people it's their nails. Some people, it's their beard. Mine's my makeup, but done in a certain way.

Like, I lack there of beard, but I'm trying. No, I get you on that.

No, you don't. But I think another really big key component is surrounding myself with people that are also posting their business, following a lot of accounts where fellow women or even men were also promoting their businesses, products, whatever it may be online, because I visually saw other people putting themselves out there. So I'm like, it can be done. People that barely have a following do it, people that have millions of followers do it. And I see that they also— I watch a lot of videos that they talk about how they started. They were also extremely awkward. They're so shameful of their starting videos, of their starting posts, that they just had to get through that phase. Everyone's going to be cringe at the beginning. And because I'm basically hitting puberty so late on posting myself on social media, I am starting cringe right now. Well, within this past year. And I have to get through my cringe. I might always be cringe, but I need to be okay with that.

The cringe is your perception on it.

Yeah. I might be the only one cringing.

Yeah. I mean, we watch a lot of cringe stuff and it's like, really? You posted that? And then you just see the engagement is ridiculous. Like they eat it up. They love it. Thousands and thousands of views. And you're like, really? And then you try to doll yourself up for some high quality content and all of a sudden you're not getting—

No one cares.

No one cares about that at all.

And that's too, I may be cringe to a certain population, but not cringe to the people that matter. And so that's what I really had to shift my focus on and my perspective is that I am only making this content for people that matter. Forget all the other people, forget my friends or following that only see me in one certain way that really is contributing nothing to my life, like on a day-to-day basis. You know, great having them, love you all, but on a day-to-day basis, you're not paying my bills, we're not hanging out all the time or ever, and if you unfollow me, I wouldn't know any different. If you sent a hateful comment, maybe I feel bad a little, but you know, at the end of the day, it's not contributing anything positive to me.

So you need to have the accountability of what it is you're working towards in order to post. And I like what you said, just do it, just post it. And it's easier said than done, but when you make that first post and break the seal, you don't have to know everything you're gonna do with that post. Yeah, but you have the video, you have the receipts of different contents, of the different unboxings, of the different voiceovers of whatever you did, the different YouTube videos that you may start one day in the future. It's there. Once you have it now figure it out because you at least started doing that. You got comfortable whipping out the phone whenever, you know, the most awkward spot or awkward time. But it was the most powerful time to have that phone over that recording. Not saying it's for a car accident taking place and you're trying to, oh, look what happened there, or a fight that breaks out, like something that's actually impactful and meaningful that you're contributing to community.

Yeah, especially when things are something really meaningful or impactful, like you said, happens to you and you want to talk about it right away because that's when you're most passionate about it or it's fresh in your mind. You have to be comfortable with recording things on a whim. So that's something that I've been getting a little bit more comfortable is, you know, talking about things while it's fresh because you'll be able to tell that story a lot better when it's fresh. But to get back to like my process, I think one is just start in baby steps, being comfortable posting content even if it's just words or whatever it may be if you don't post anything online. And then two, community. Following people that align with you, what you want to be, people you aspire to be, content that you like, whether it's physically aesthetic that you align with, or you just love how confident they are on camera and you're like, when you watch their videos, you gain confidence too. That's a big thing. And then one of the best things that happened was you in my life because—

You heard it here, folks. Best thing that's ever happened in her life. Oh, I can't wait to see this in the future.

For the content. For the content and other things, because you push me every single day, all day. Yeah, coach, pretty much, because I am so resistant. Like, it's innate in me. I'm so resistant to the content, to social media, to recording. It's, it's just I haven't done it day in, day out for a long time, so it is a skill. It's muscle memory. Um, so you being on my arse all the time, whether it's just pushing me, like hyping me up, telling me what content I should post, giving me ideas, being my setup guy, all those things, giving me ideas on, you know, whether it's apps for editing, cameras, things like that. I am not good at tech either. There are so many things that you've done and helped me with my systems, tech, recording confidence that has shifted me to be who I am today showing up online.

Yeah, and I know I could be very naggy only because we live with each other. It's because I see so much in you that you can be doing, but I know that you have to get out of that shell that you're in in order to really do some powerful things. And I say that because I watch what you watch and I see the people you look up to. And it's nice to always consume their content. But when you just keep being high on that dopamine of what they're saying, but you're never applying what they're teaching you, that's where the disconnect happens. And that's where I feel like, Cassandra, you have all this, you know all this stuff. What are you going to do with this? You're just going to take it to your grave?

Yeah.

Are you just going to— what's going to happen with us? I mean, it's nice to know all this stuff. And that's kind of like why my disconnect is with news and current events. A lot of things like that. It's nice to know things, but what am I going to do with that knowledge? Am I going to go out and preach about it? Am I going to protest again? It's— if it doesn't relate to me in a way that I'm going to use it, then I don't need it. But I see that you consume so much greatness, so much high-quality content. I see a lot of people who look up to you or don't even know you exist yet that would look up to you because, one, you're beautiful, two, you're smart. You were a professor. You mean you have your master's degree. You were going to be a surgeon at some point, thinking about it. I mean, you have such high quality. Now you're a business owner. There's so many young women or older women that would look up and say, damn, that girl's doing it and she's married and she's a woman of God. That's crazy. Like, there's so much qualities that's there that would make you so visible to so many people who don't know what you're really capable of other than being Justin's wife, because they see me posting all the time. Yeah, but when you have your own platform, and you're really excelling, showing who you are, you're going to be a killer, hun. Yeah, I think it's powerful.

Well, thank you for that. Thank you for all those nice comments. I paid him. I think surrounding people that give you that stage, that platform, that confidence to step into your own self is really important too. Not being with people that dim your shadow, because I'm a person that I'm I'm so okay being in the shadow. I'm okay being in the backdrop. I've never been wanting attention. I've never been theater kid or wanting to be on stage. Heck, even posting myself online, like I haven't been doing when I was younger. And that's why to take center stage is so different for me. And it is— I'll keep saying one of the best things. Being married to you. Because you give me that stage, you willingly give me that stage and you hype me up and you push me physically with your foot. Get on stage, girl. Yeah, literally. And I need that. So for someone like me that's so okay with being in the background, that works in the shadows, that it's like no cameras naturally, it's so important to be with someone that shoves you on stage and says, get out there and get it.

Get out there and do it, girl. I mean, going back to, I mean, simple terms, our wedding. You said, let's get married in court. And I said, absolutely not.

Yeah.

Your sister got married in court. Your parents never walked her down the aisle. Sorry if you're watching this.

And a true aisle.

True aisle.

Yeah.

And then I didn't want that for you. I wanted more for you. I wanted your family to be able to say, I'm giving my youngest daughter away, my last child. And then I'm an only child. So I know my mom wants to, you know, be a part of a ceremony giving her only son, only child away.

Yeah.

So I felt like that was something that's very beautiful where I said, well, If you just want to get married in court, I'll just take the reins on this and I'll plan the entire wedding, which was phenomenal in Hawaii. Highly recommend watching that video. It was so sentimental and beautiful, but I feel like I have to see the good in people. Not that I have to, but I love that I generally see good in people and I guess it's one of my gifts on knowing that people have something in them that can be so much more.

She's old.

She's old.

She likes to be near us. Yeah, we never know when we're gonna be her last moment.

All right, little old girl. All right.

Okay.

It's okay, Mama, it's okay. Okay. Seeing gifts in people that they don't see themselves, and it frustrates me because I want— maybe that's the problem there, is I said I want and it's not for my want. I wish that they would see the potential that they have in themselves, that when somebody says, man, you're good at that, 'Oh, you would be so amazing to do that. How did you know that? You know, no one else knows that.' You know, when you're giving them that feedback and they're just easily dismissive on it and they just put it down and they don't see their value in nothing and they continue to just live out their days, it just— I don't know, it kind of breaks my heart, but it just makes me really disappointed that, wow, people have such great talents and such gifts, but they don't know how to utilize that, or they don't see the value in what they can contribute, and then they lower their own value for whatever their dollar amount is per hour at their job, and they stay like that, and they wonder why other people become successful and they just fall short because they don't believe in themselves.

And the scariest thing is them fast forward 30 years and someone says, wow, you had so much potential.

That's the worst.

And they're like, dang, yeah, I was told so many times I could be a good leader, I could be a good whatever. Yeah. And they never used it. So I know it can be really frustrating. I'm sure sometimes it's frustrating for you too, seeing me kind of like push back on certain things, and just know I'm going through my process.

I know, and then I expect you to be resistant because one, I don't want to say I have expectations for my marriage, but I hold my marriage up to a high value and a high standard. Not that it's pressure that it has to be my way, but I know what our potential can be. And in order for that potential to be met, you have to continue to sharpen the iron and keep putting the iron against the grind and just slow pushes, little nudges, little 1% better every single day.

And that goes with what we said in one of our first podcasts is that in order to grow, you have to be okay with being uncomfortable. You have to get uncomfortable and you have to kind of feel comfortable in uncomfortable. Moments. Yeah, and that also goes for marriage. In order to push each other to be in that better version of ourselves consistently in life, I have to be okay with you making me uncomfortable and pushing me to be in things that are new. And if you were just helping me be complacent with life, that wouldn't be a good marriage. That'd be a terrible marriage.

Yeah.

Um, so I'm grateful that you make me uncomfortable. I think in a lot of marriages they might sense that as a bad thing. It may create a lot of friction. It could go a whole other direction. And so it's a delicate dance and balance of pushing, promoting, saying it, delivery. Yeah, to have a good delivery.

It's all about delivery. Yeah. And the messaging, because you just can't give the final product like, you could be doing this. Yeah. And just leave it as that. Like, this could be you. Why isn't this not you? I have to paint the picture on where we're at today how the journey is going to be, what greatness we're going to have along the way to then get to that ending destination that's going to be so beautiful. Yeah, like a GPS. You start from point A to point B, and point B is there, and our starting point is here. I'm trying to show you which navigation we're going to take. Are we going to take the, the quick route? Uh, we're going to take the expressway and pay a little toll for a little shortcut? Are we going to take where all the traffic is at and it just learn through all the bad things and make our marriage all rocky and, you know, angry and stuff like that.

You got to be around people that inspire you. You got to inspire people, not be a dictator to people.

Yeah, that's nice to say.

I've had leaders that just bark commands at you and reprimand you when you don't do things a certain way, and they're like, oh, you could be doing this or that and, you know, become this, but their delivery is awful and it makes you want to run in the other direction. It makes you not want to do it. And I think it's so important to have people that inspire you. And like you said, deliver in a way that's going to guide them, inspire them, and give them the tools to get to that final position in life. And really visualize that next goal and what it would look like for them, because without that, it's not going to happen.

Yeah, and then that helps break that limited belief that you have with what you can do which makes you not want to get on camera to make your video. And by having that guidance and just chiseling away that shell that you have up there, that protective coating, you're able to then get to that center yolk of you being happy and being confident with who you are to say, I could be on camera.

Yeah.

And when you say that, you know, you look at your, uh, heroes, people that you're inspired by, the Leila Hermosis and Who else do you watch?

I'm agreed.

Who?

I'm agreed.

Emma Greed. Yeah, I'm not familiar with her.

Okay, well, she's co-founder of Good American, but she's like a true businesswoman. She has so— you gotta watch her.

Okay.

All right, she's great.

People like that on where they're at today, you watch them and you should see that they're so far ahead, and you're like, absolutely not, I can never achieve that, I can't get there. They put in so much work. Something I like to do is just like whoever your favorite influencer is or somebody that you look up to that's a good influencer, reverse engineer where they're at to where they started. Go to the oldest videos, look at what those first videos look like. Look at what you're feeling right now today. You're feeling that cringe. Those first uploads that they put up there is their cringe. Those are probably your first videos. If not, you've probably learned way more than they did for their first video, so your first video looks like probably their hundredth video because you've already applied a lot of their teachings that they've taught you. They probably didn't have anything back then. Yeah, they were just like off the rip, like, we're just going to turn the camera on, we're going to just see where this goes. But you've already learned what doesn't work, what doesn't work. You have some type of frameworks in mind. So now you've skipped ahead already and now your first videos is probably way less cringy than theirs. Yeah, but it's always nice to go back to see what that looks like and see what their upbringing, what their journey was like. And you learn so much about that and then you learn what it took for them to get from point A that makes it really relatable to you in your current state to where they're at now, and you're like, oh, that's all they did? Yeah, I could do that.

And that, that's super important you talk about that because I do scroll back in some of their feeds, some people I look up to, and it's like their quality was so much worse, their content was a little cringy, I ain't gonna lie, or maybe they look different because it was like pre-procedures, whatever it may be. And Of course, they evolved over time in all capacities, but I was like, "Okay, they had so many phases. Their content looked so different every couple weeks, months, maybe even days." Yeah. And they've evolved it into this amazing platform now that they have. And also watching— I love that we're in this day and age where we can hear people's stories, especially those that are heavily online. A lot of them go on podcasts, talk about their background, where they started. And a lot of them started decades ago, several years ago from the ground up, working for free for people, being in, you know, basically the ups and downs we go through, but 10 times worse over and over again to get to the success we see today. It wasn't an overnight sensation. It was blood, sweat, and tears for years and years and years, sometimes almost going bankrupt.

That's a bar, blood, sweat, and tears for the years.

That's a bar, sorry. Okay. Yes, blood, sweat, and tears for the years. And seeing them go through that, we're just seeing in our head the finished product. Of course it isn't, but this finalized beautiful person they are now and business that they have. But truly they have been a working machine that they've been making little tweaks to for a long time.

Yeah, and they're getting real feedback, real-time feedback every time. So they're posting it, but they're learning about what they're posting because I mean, they might look at their viewers, look at the engagement they're getting. Maybe they look at similar views or similar content that's posted posted in that same niche or whatever and are learning what not to do, what to do, how to change their tone. Maybe they heard their feedback on how they sound. Maybe they said, why do I sound like that? Hey, why do I sit like that? Maybe I should be more like this. Maybe I should turn the camera more like this. Maybe I should get a new light and make it like, like this to make it more vibrant.

Exactly.

There's so many things that you learn, but in order to learn, you have to—

you gotta do—

you gotta start, because you can never— you will never have the perfect product right in the jump. And if you did have the perfect product, it's probably not going to be really relatable because It's perfect, it's your first post, you're probably not gonna get much engagement, and then what do you do from there? You've already made the post of that's perfect.

You're already at the top of the top.

Now what do I do now? How do I top the top that I tried, that I waited all these years to top? And that didn't really get any engagement or anything like that.

'Cause they've adjusted over time to their content. Now this is now feedback time for me.

Yeah.

And another thing that really helped is that when I was shifting this identity from just personal social media content, personal life, I was so used to getting quite a few likes because it's all fun things, it's people that, oh look, she's celebrating her birthday or whatever it may be, going on a trip to another country and I got a lot of likes because it's easy thing to celebrate. But when you're posting things about your business or shifting things, you gotta get to a period where you gotta be okay with getting very few likes because not a lot of people are gonna celebrate those things. It should be more celebrated, but not a lot of people are gonna be promoting, helping promote your business or really relating to health insurance or whatever business you have that it may not be as sexy, may not be as exciting. You're not gonna get as much engagement at first because you're still trying to reform your following to people that are quality for your business. So they're still quality for your personal life, but they're not quality for your business. So you gotta be okay with not a lot of engagement and working up to maybe from 6 likes to 100 likes to maybe one day 1,000 likes and thousands of comments. But you gotta know that you're looking for quality, not quantity, at that stage. And that's why when I post things and I only get a few likes on business, I'm like, great, but maybe I got that one client who's reaching out that it related to, and I sell a policy.

Yeah, absolutely. And that's one thing you take— it's viewers versus your profit. Views are not going to make you money. I mean, when back in the day when Instagram or YouTube came out, your viewership And your AdSense dictated how much money you would be getting. And that's what people thrived off. That's what I did. I was trying to make the content that was the latest unboxing video for the newest PlayStation or whatever the new iPhone came out. Like I was jumping on the trends that way I could be in the top search rank so I can then be popular so that way they'll see my, my content. And oh, Justin did an unboxing on this and you make your money off of that, but it's super competitive. And that is the old way on trying to monetize off of social media. The new way— and I'm gonna drop a nugget on you guys, this is probably a big secret that would make you multiple hundreds of thousands of dollars in a year, you know— is that you self-promote your brand in your ad. You have your video, in your video you have your ad for your product, your service, whatever you do. Rather if it's in the description, rather if it's look over your policy, rather if it's I could do some type of mentorship for you. You promote yourself, not someone else's stuff. I mean, you can do products, whatever it is. This video is sponsored by— and sure, if they're paying for it, whatever. But for your own services, in-ad promotions are GOAT because those will drive true dollars. So taking those viewers of thousands, hundreds of thousands of views, that's not going to give you money. It's It's not going to really do much for you. It's going to make you go viral. But is virality going to really give you true money? It'll give you exposure and it may give you money down the road. But in the short time while you're starting this, don't chase the views. Don't chase the virality. Chase those small, intimate people who are going to rock with you, that your core 100 people who are going to rock with you from today all the way to the end. And they're going to tell their friends and their friends and their friends and they're going to— I need health insurance.

Yeah.

You put a little call to action at the bottom. if you need help with your health insurance, DM me the word help and I will help you as best as I can. What happened this morning? You posted something like 5 weeks ago. Somebody commented help, send her a message. Now we're sending her a message and we're back and forth now. We're going to hop on the phone and try to figure out what's going on in her situation there. Yeah, but that was a seed that was planted.

Had you not been posting because you're too afraid to post, would have never happened.

Would never happen. And then in sales, what do most people do? What's the old way of sales? Before you had door knocking, now you have cold calling. Now we have all these call blocks and everything. So cold calling is not just the way to go because when you stop calling people, when you stop buying leads from these vendors, your business stops. You have no ingredients for your business. What do you do?

You—

well, you have no credibility because you have no organic content. So no one knows who you are. You're just a closet cold caller and you have nothing to show for it.

Yep. And that's the biggest thing why I wanted to make online presence and build a brand. Is to be in the business of people, of relationships, of a referral business, of a long-term relationship, not only with my personal community but like clientele and people that, you know, want to root for me or had a great experience from me that continue to follow me and think of me every single time someone in their, you know, web diagram needs insurance. And that it I wanted to shift away from a transactional business.

Yeah.

And I know you feel the same way, that that's a big thing why we want this community, because when you have a transactional business, it's so easy for that to become unstable, and it's definitely not a long-term plan at all. So not only do we still get leads online, you know, that's always going to be a good way to immediately feed your business But for longevity, even to eventually maybe if you want to sell your business, having a core group of people that are sending to you, whether it's referral partners or book of business, whatever it may be, that's so important to have because that means your business is quality, it's healthy, it's thriving.

And the sales are so much more rewarding because you've— they've engaged with you, they know who you are, they rock with you, and they feel that you really hear them out. So then by the time that you hop on the phone with them, or even if you don't even hop on the phone, maybe they just send you a message and they just need your help. That warm market is so ready to buy and it's so intimate that they're going to share your content. They can't share— I mean, they can share my business card if I call them, you know, cold call them and just hope, then pray I get referrals off of this stranger that they just met, sold a policy to, you know. But when you have that organic content, it's so much more inviting, so much more fulfilling. Like, man, I'm making these videos not knowing what's going to happen with them. But the content that I have is infinite. It is out there forever. My calls are one and done.

One and done.

I call one person I paid money for and I don't have that person ever again unless I sell that lead to go sell it to someone else. They call them or I call them in 6 months to see if anything's changed.

And it's not even one and done. You're going to call them, they might answer, you're going to have to keep dialing them. Yeah, it's so much of your time. Maybe sell them. And maybe they think of you when they have someone in their network that needs the same product.

And maybe they will not be a chargeback.

And maybe they will not be a chargeback. So there's a lot of maybes. So it is a business of numbers. Transactional business is a business of numbers, but we don't want to be in that business where you got to be a workhorse. We want things to organically come to us and be a little bit more hefty.

Yeah, and that pain point of what you were experiencing with the leads that you were having help ignite more of the why I need to make the content, why I need to step in front of the camera. So again, when I first asked the question on do you need a business in order to go ahead and be in front of the camera, you don't have to have a business, but you have to have a solid reason on what it is that you want to do on camera to be able to exploit— not exploit yourself, but to expose yourself out there and to put yourself out there to maybe get criticized, maybe not get the views that you thought you were going to get, but you might change one life and that one life is more meaningful than disappointing all these other people because you didn't post the right thing at the right time and because you limited yourself there.

That's true. Even as simple as me following a lot of these wellness girlies that are incorporating, you know, more whole foods or certain micro ingredients. I love watching those things and I'm sure some of them don't even monetize off of it, but I just enjoy watching it and they're making an effect on my life.

Yeah.

And it's so enjoyable to watch and do.

And I'm glad you said that because this is the— this is where you have to have that balance between consuming other people's stuff and then creating your own stuff there. There are people who just binge, who just watch, who sit on their phones and just scroll aimlessly all day waiting to get to the bottom and they never reach it. And there are some who just love to create because they're so creative and they love to give. And maybe they're hungry for money. There could be that too. A lot of variables with that. But there are people that like to create content for others to consume. You always— and I say always— you got to find the fine balance of consuming enough content that keeps you accountable to create your own, where it's not too much of your own consumption of creating or watching other people live their life while you don't live yours. But then also you don't want to just be in your own bubble of just creating so much content that no one ever cares about because it's— there's— you have no audience. You're creating for yourself. And true, you're creating for yourself because you're feeling good about what you're doing, but you have to know what your audience is and what your audience want. Who are you talking to? It's a one-to-one conversation, but you're talking to many. Who is that person that's sitting on the other side of the camera that you're talking to? That one-to-one person, that's where you have to have that fine align at. So that's why I always pressured her, consume less, create more.

Yeah, it's a fine balance between watching things that inspire you, that you align with, and also doing something that's investing in yourself rather than just taking a back seat.

Yeah, and investing yourself is a huge thing because there's brain rot, which sometimes is needed. Sometimes you gotta turn the brain off and just let it do its thing.

Yeah.

And then there's time where you have to actually really invest. I need to take I'm taking in valuable information that's going to help me excel myself, not reruns of the same shows, not listening to the same music all day, every day, because I know the lyrics and I feel all big and bad when I'm in the club. I can spit every lyric about it. What is that really doing for me monetarily, spiritually, business? What is that doing? That's what you have to really understand. That all ties down to your why. What is— what are my moves? Why do I wake up every single day? Who am I impacting? Is it my family? Is it my kids? Is it my spouse? Is it because I hate my job and I want to leave it? What is your reason for being? And that is such a huge thought that it becomes overwhelming, but it's your reason for why you're here, and you got to realize that or just continue to live disappointed every day.

And that's the shift you got to have, because going from W-2 to being a business owner I was used to clocking out and getting the brain rot. I was used to wanting to just shut off my mind because I didn't have to work. Work was done. Now it's time to just kind of rest, reset, enjoy a little bit of what I had. And shifting that to now needing to invest in myself, I had to shut that off and be like, okay, less brain rot, more investing in myself. And when the fire was hot, when you feel inspired you gotta roll with it because it is so important to take advantage while that spark is going because once it goes away, once that fire's out, it's really hard to get back.

Especially when you don't have a surrounding environment that keeps that flame going.

Yeah.

While your flame is flickering in the wind, there's got to be somebody who's holding their hand over to just—

someone's trying to blow it out.

Well, I mean, somebody there to try to keep it going, you know.

No, but I'm saying if you don't have that community around you that's going to help.

Yeah, yeah, everyone's trying to blow it out.

Everyone's trying to blow it out. No one wants your light to be bright. They want you to dim your light.

No one likes to watch other people succeed. They want to see people fail.

You got to find the people that wants to help you succeed, that wants to root for you. And I think that's why it's— if you're going to shift to be a business owner, entrepreneur, solopreneur, you gotta align yourself or be around more people like you that are going after building something for themselves because if you're around a bunch of people that are just clocking in to their shift and clocking out, they're gonna yank you to do things where they just wanna like rot, so they want you to rot with them. You gotta be with people that are like, hey, let's do a filming day, or hey, let's go work on some social media content, or even just post together and sit on our computers, or instead of going out for cocktails, let's have like a coffee morning together and work on you know, how we're going to promote each other's business, or just network, go to a networking event.

Yeah.

And those are the kind of people you want to align with, because once you become your own business, your business doesn't stop. You are the brand.

Yeah.

So you need to find ways to promote your business in all capacities.

Oh, you're like holding the mic. Is it coming?

Oh, I was moving it.

Oh, okay.

Sorry.

Yeah, I don't know why, when you were talking about rotting and being around other people that rot, I thought of like bread and you're a slice and you're in a loaf together and one starts to rot, then it just makes all the other ones rot. So it's like the whole loaf is your department.

Or you're in a pack of cuties and one cutie goes bad and then all the cuties are bad.

Is that from experience?

Yes. And my lychee, I packed a lychee I got. There was one mold one day, I'll throw it out. And then the next day there was two. And the next day there was so much more and throw out the whole bag. There it is. That's your whole business gone.

I was so sad.

My business gone.

So now that you created your first post, you overcame it, you broke the seal, how do you feel?

I feel good. I feel like the shackles are slightly released, you know. I'm always going to be a work in progress, but I feel like the shackles have been somewhat taken off because I was so fixed to who I wanted to present myself online. I was so fixed to not being a business person or pushing any products online, um, and being so hyper-aware of how I look in my photos. And now that it's just, okay, I am who I am, you take it or leave it. I'm going to promote myself because I have great products. I love what I do. I am damn good at what I do. And if I can help you, you're going to be in good hands with me. So why wouldn't I share that with the world? And I had to come to terms with that, that me holding back my gifts was a negative thing for both me and the people in my community. Because there are so many people signing up for insurance left and right these days that are getting a bad life insurance policy or a terrible health insurance policy, not knowing what they're signing up for, or a group insurance policy that they're paying 3 times the price of what they should be paying. And me being able to help them not only, of course, will help me and my business be healthy, but save people. I save people all the time, thousands, if not tens of thousands of dollars, every single client that I help, because there's always a way to put them in a better position.

Absolutely. And that would have never happened if we didn't get married.

I didn't say that.

I'm glad you said that though.

If you didn't kick me on the stage.

No, but if you didn't just start to do it. And that was at least being around it to know that you needed it to be done.

Yeah, I had to put myself out there a lot, not only online, but what helped a lot too was putting my, myself out there with networking groups, even presenting through Zoom and in person through my networking groups really helped with me being confident with my presence. So that translated to social media because I was You'll hear it in your voice when you start being confident in yourself, conveying things to other people, you are a lot more eloquent, you're less timid, hunched, you know.

Yeah, more conviction.

More conviction in your voice and what you're doing, and that'll translate to all aspects of your life.

Yeah, which is something that you didn't have when you first started.

No, because I had nothing of my own. I didn't have anything on my own. Even when I first started, it was like I was just starting to build my business, so it was like, okay, we gotta put our training wheels on. And before that, in my W-2 jobs, that truly building for someone else's dream.

Yeah.

And I may have been good at my job, but I wasn't confident because I didn't want to be there my entire life.

Yeah. And you know, when you said that, I don't know why I thought about this, but when we look at our leaders, we look at our look at them as mentors, supposed to, somebody that you want to be. You got that degree to get to that business, to work your way up to that chain of command, to wherever that President, Director, whomever is, and that's what you're supposed to want because that's why you went to the school and did all that. But when you're not learning anything in that environment or you don't respect the business or respect your leaders, it's like, then what am I doing?

Everything goes out the window.

How am I really learning? What am I really learning? That's where the brain rot sits. That's where you slowly start to die. That's when you don't have growth. That's when you don't have any conviction. That's when nothing happens. That's when your marriage starts failing. That's when you spiritually walk away from God. There's so much that just happens.

Yeah.

And you don't really realize that because you're in this circle, this box. And once you have that community of people that want more for themselves and want more for their neighbor, it's so enriching and it's so— it's like you don't— there's so much— there's— it feels like there's not enough time in the day because you're so excited to do so many different things.

It is. And that brings me back to my PTSD from corporate America, that when you're in a position that you work your ace off for. I don't know if we're allowed to cuss in this podcast. Um, arse, that you work your arse off for, and you, you know, don't get the promotion. Your leaders don't hype you up, and there are other people climbing the corporate ladder that are not as good at their job. It's because they kind of rubbed more shoulders than you, kissed more arses than you. And it is so defeating because then you're like, okay, as natural human instincts, we want to progress. We want to progress as a species. So when you're feeling like you're not progressing in the place you're spending most of your time for, the goals that you set yourself out for, then your job is— it is actually just purely transactional. It's no longer something you enjoy because you are not being fed right at your job. It's, it's very defeating, and I feel like a lot of people can relate to that. Because they have morals. They want to follow their morals and not kiss butts in the way that some other people will do to get to that next promotion. And, you know, you work yourself way harder than the other person, and that's where you get to that tipping point, like, okay, I should go off and do my own thing because then I can actually hit my own goals, make my own money, and not have to be in this hamster wheel of a W-2 job.

Yeah, so that pain point of seeing where you were rotting at helped you realize that you want to run a business, to then start a business, to realize how the businesses are traditionally ran aren't lucrative in the way that— enriching for yourself, to the point that you realize that content and organic and having a brand, having an image. When someone sees Cassandra, they know who you are because of your content. You realize how important that is. Everything just kind of staggers along the way. Unhappy job. I need to do something for myself. I'm doing something for myself. Whoa, what am I doing for myself? This isn't really working. I'm only doing it because I'm told to do this. Okay, I need to do something for myself. I need to create a brand. I need content to validate my brand. That was a turning point, it seems, to then say, let me turn on the camera, let me be on it, let me shoot my first YouTube video. I've done it. I broke the seal. I feel good about it. I want to get better.

Yep. And now it's just, let's get better.

Let's get better.

That's it.

I love it. Thank you for being here today.

Oh, I'm always here. I'm always here. Thank you for being here today. Always, always, always.

If you're sitting there and thinking about sharing your story, but you're scared to be seen, I want you to know something. The world doesn't need another version of someone else. It needs you. It needs you to be visible. And visibility is not arrogance. It's obedience. It's saying yes to calling what's inside of you. If you can see that my wife can do something like this after years of hesitation, so can you.

Yep.

Head to the link in the description. We got a 3-day challenge starting soon that's gonna walk you through the exact same steps she went through to get to where she's at today. Can't wait to see you guys. Peace out.