A Conversation with Bernadette Doyle | S03E07

Welcome to season three of the Leadership Is Feminine podcast. I'm Chris Plackey and I'm so happy that you're here. In this season, we're doing something different. One of the things that I believe to be true is that there is so much unsourced, beautiful wisdom in the everyday person. I really like to talk about what I call obscure wisdom. That means these are things that people know that unless we meet them at a cocktail party or at a barbecue or sitting next to them, you know, on a train, we don't hear about it. And these aren't celebrities. These aren't people who've written, you know, best selling books yet. These aren't people that are on the circuit that everybody else is learning from. These are everyday women who are CEOs, building, dealing with, working through all the pieces and parts of running a company. And I want to bring my beautiful clients and their wisdom to your ears because I know that you'll find it to be validating and insightful and hopefully also some fun. So, without further ado, let's get started with this week's amazing personal client and guest on Leadership Is Feminine. Okay, everyone, welcome, welcome. I'm so happy that Bernadette Doyle is here with me. Bernadette and I work together, you were just saying. It's been about a year ago now through the how to CEO program. She was one of our star clients who came to all the calls and did all the work and did a lot of heavy lifting. We were working together. So I was so excited that you said yes and wanted to be on the podcast. So I'm thrilled you're here today. So welcome. And while I turn it over to you, why don't you tell us who you are, what you do, and what the magic is that you bring into the world.

Okay. Well, I am Bernadette Doyle. I'm here in Belfast in Northern Ireland. Not originally from here. I actually grew up in Oxford in England. And my business I started 26 years ago this year.

That is amazing.

I started out selling sales training to corporate clients and then it evolved into working with in service providers, self employed service providers. So like coaches, consultants, really helping them to get clients and showing them how I'd got my business established. And then about, oh, it must have been about 18 years ago, then I moved online and I started selling information products online. And then that's now evolved into an online coaching business. So I still work with the same type of person. So someone who has an expertise that they share with clients and they want to know how to get more clients. In a nutshell, I help people get clients and make money.

That's not a bad thing to do in the world.

It's a good thing to do in the world.

It's a really good thing. How has the last couple of years.

Been, I'm curious, with COVID And so it's funny when. When Covid came along, what I most remember was like, this feeling of it's showtime. And I was like, game on. And I knew that I really wanted to lead. My people, who were like, a lot of people were getting into fear about what would happen, Sphere of unknown, and like, what's this new world that we're entering into? And, you know, I was almost like. It was like I was making a call. I did Facebook lives, and I was like, this is the moment of opportunity. If you keep your head and you stay focused, you're going to thrive through this. And I created a program we called Plan B. And it was a 30 day program. Awesome.

Yeah.

And we did it in April 2020, and it was really just about helping people to, like, essentially keep focused and keep enrolling during the pandemic. And it was amazing. Like, I had client. One client came in and did 40,000 in sales that month, and that was 40,000 British. So that would be maybe like 60 or $70,000.

Yeah.

And so many clients that, like, it became their best month ever, and it was just a case of, like, just really keeping them focused on the right things and, you know, just handling the fear that was coming up for everyone. So that was fun.

You know, I have to say, when. That I had a similar experience to you, and there were a few of us who got together on March 12th or 13th, 2020, and we really had that conversation, like, okay, this is what I've been preparing for, really. And in my experience, having worked in leadership coaching and development, I had all these tools for change and ambiguity and how to lead when you don't know where you're going. And so I actually created a program in April that I called Leading Through Crazy, which is so funny. And. Yeah. And some of the people that did that became some of the best clients I've ever had and have done really, really well. But it was, you know, people were really, really. All of us were so searching. We were so. And we were all. I think we all found an Achilles moment for ourselves that we all had to sort of get other support for that maybe we hadn't really done in the past. Right. That's certainly what happened for me.

But it was good.

It was a good. It was a good time, and it was a good time to be prepared. So I have a question. 26 years.

I know.

I was a toddler.

I know you must have been five when you started, right? You were selling Legos. But what do you think is just coaching someone right now, just right before this call for this recording? And she said, I have to get out of the cycle of, am I going to keep doing this? Should I just walk away? Should I just quit? Right. Because she's so exhausted with so many of the elements of running a business. I'm just kind of curious, what is your secret sauce that keeps you going?

Although I've been in business for 26 years, and I've always been working in the area of sales and helping people to get new clients, but there's also been a lot of variety in that, and it's normally been led by, like, what my clients tell me they want. So, for example, when I started really getting into online and I had an email list and I was sending out a newsletter when no one was sending out a newsletter, when you said, oh, I've got a free newsletter, people were like, wow, sign me up. You know, those were the early days. And then I had clients who saw me doing that and they're like, okay, can you teach me how to do what you're doing? And so. So then I was like, okay, I'll teach you how to set up an email list and I'll teach you how to create products that you can sell online. And then, like, there's always something new to learn. So I remember it was about 15 years ago, I got really into selling from webinars and using webinars as a sales tool. And more recently, it's been around Facebook lives, so. So I always feel that there's something new for me to learn, and I think that's what keeps it interesting for me.

Yeah. And it sounds like because you sort of have this natural interest and then you learn it and then you extend that learning and teach it. Right. So you learn it, make it yours, and then sell it. Right. As part of your services. So that's pretty cool. Yeah. That's a true entrepreneurial space spirit. Right. I've often had people ask me, would you ever go back to a corporate. Like, if someone offered you a really good CEO position or something, would you go back? And there's no. There is no way ever.

Yeah, I don't actually think they'd have me. I think I have said the same thing.

I Think I'm unemployable at this point?

Yeah, Certain I am.

We work in strange, weird hours and so forth, so. Okay, so another question I have for you that I've asked a few of the other women that have been on the podcast so far is really kind of that, you know, we're spilling the tea a little, right. We're talking a little bit about things that people don't talk about. And I remember when I was pregnant, you know, I remember realizing there's a lot of things that people don't tell you about being pregnant, that once you. Once you go through it and you say these things out loud, other people are like, oh, yeah, me too. Like, why don't we talk about this part? We only talk about this part. Right. The fun part. So I'm kind of curious what you think is something that other women, as CEOs do wrangle or work through that we don't talk about that much.

We do talk about it in your world, but it wasn't until I came into your world that I really got a sense of how much the things that I'd struggled with around team and people management that I actually had a lot of shame about. So I didn't want to talk to anybody about it. I didn't realize until I was in your world just how many other women were dealing with that as well. And I think. Because I think for me, looking back, there was a lot of people pleasing, a lot of avoiding confrontation. I'm going right back to very early in my business just to have the conversation of, like, having to let someone go. It was just excruciating because I had so many thoughts around it. And what I loved about being in your program was from day one. I don't remember you ever saying this explicitly, but to me, you just exuded. There's no people problem that I either haven't dealt with or that we can't deal with. I could feel my nervous system settle down in your presence.

All this drama, all these stories I've got about what's happened and what I think I can or can't do. It's like you were just like, we've got this.

We've got it. Right. Yeah. You had an Olivia Pope moment. You know, Olivia Pope is. Yeah.

Scandal.

Yeah. It's handled. It's just handled. I love that. I love her. I love her suits, everything about her. She has great wine glasses.

I loved the early series of scandals. It just got silly.

It got dumb. I agree. But, yeah, the early. The first couple Seasons were amazing and inspiring. Yes, I loved her. Okay, well, that's really, really powerful because I've heard a lot of other women say, you know, and it's interesting because we were talking right before we started the recording that there was a time when you used to come to the States a lot and you were part of Masterminds. And, and I know even when I met Allie Brown for the first time and I hired her and I did a VIP day with her and I was like explaining to her what I do and she was like, wait, what? Like people do that? Like, she didn't know either because it's like we get into these masterminds to grow our business, but there's this part that's never talked about. And if team is talked about, it's talked about in a very tertiary kind of way and not really in that because I think it's such a soul work hiring people.

I must tell you about the first mastermind I was in and it was run by a guy called Get Yannick Silver. And there's a lot of people that have gone on to be massive digital marketers like Ryan Dyess and Perry Belcher. They were in the group as well. It was very male dominated. And for me, even get to these meetings was massive because my, my kids at the time I think were maybe like 1 and 2 and I had to arrange a family member to come and stay and I'd go over and would love the fact that I could just sit on the plane and have a glass of wine. Because you had toddlers. Anyway, at one of these meetings I was celebrating because I'd finally, I'm single and I finally got myself a live in nanny housekeeper. And I was saying to the guys in this group, I'm like, this has just been a complete game changer for me. It's like there's a portion of my brain that no longer needs to worry, is there milk? Is the laundry done? There's food in the fridge, dinners on the table. Like, this is just transformed. Like all of my brain that was worried about that I'm now able to put into my business. And the room went silent. And the guys are like looking like this at me. And then one of them pipes up, but Bernadette, we've all got one of those. It's called a wife.

Goodness.

But that's how it was. And I think that's how it is for women running business. And so I'm talking there about like domestic help. But I remember those meetings. It's like I couldn't get the help that I got in your program at those mastermind. Because if I was trying to say, well, I've got this situation with this person that isn't quite right, but I love her and we're friends, and how can I possibly say to her, you know, this isn't working out, and I think you need to go and do this. And they. They would just like, woman emotional.

Right?

Let's just talk about rates.

Conversion.

You need a minute?

Oh, that's where the acronyms start. And I'm like, in a room. I'm like, I don't. I'm like, with my phone, like, what is this acronym?

I don't know what anything means.

Somebody just said something on a call the other day. I'm like.

But listen, if you need to fire your best friend, I'm your girl.

Anyway. I love that you said that. You know, it's interesting, I was talking to a girlfriend this morning, and I don't really know what's happening in my brain, but I've been at this for so long. Just like, we all, right, we all have our sort of discipline that I've studied this for so long. And ironically, a lot of my philosophy is getting a little evolve. It's getting evolved, and that's good. But it's getting. It's almost like becoming a little oxymoronish. Like, I'm having these contrarian thoughts to things I've thought a long time. And that's because I've been leaning so much into this idea that leadership is feminine and not having that really cultivated in terms of definition. But I am very called to really notice that even a lot of the systems that I teach are rooted in male and masculine models.

And I think I've done a pretty good job at trying to integrate feminine qualities and skill sets into it, but it's still rooted in something that I'm working on. So, you know, I echo your life experience, and I feel like this is just something that will just keep growing and growing. Like, I can't imagine ever not doing it. And that's super fun. Once you don't ever entertain quitting.

It'S not on the table. Like, no, it's just something else. I need to figure out something else. I'll try. Right? I'm kind of curious because you work in helping people sell and increase revenue through clients. What is it? What do you think is a superpower that helps people be better at that or more successful at that or more effective at that over time than maybe others?

Something I've been talking to my clients about a lot recently is the energy in how they show up and being willing to show up before the clients ever show up.

A story I share with them is something that I witnessed. I was on holiday in a place in Lanzarote. It's called Club La Santa. And I think probably the closest thing would be something like Club Med for you guys.

Where was it?

Did you say Club La Santa? It's in Lanzarote, in the Canary Islands and surroundings. There was. But they used to do lots of activities. And there'd been a party the night before and I was down by the pool and there was an aqua aerobics class scheduled for. I think it was around noon. And I was like, I don't think she's going to get any takers for this class today. Because I saw what was going on last night, observing.

Clearly, of course, you were not participating. No.

And so at 12 o', clock, I saw her walk over to her music station. I thought, well, she's packing up to go now because no one's shown up for the class. And to my surprise, she took off her tracksuit bottoms, she put the music on, she went to stand by the pool and she started to do the motions and started calling out to an empty pool. She was calling out the aerobics class. And at first I was like, I was excruciating embarrassment for. Because I'm like, that's just awful. And then I was like, actually, no, this is really cool. Like, she is scheduled to give this class and she's not making showing up dependent upon whether there are people in the pool. She's going to do the class no matter what. And after a few minutes, some people sort of got into the pool. By the end of the class, the pool was full with people doing class with her. And I use that as an example with my clients because it's like I tell them, like, it's not just having a great message or, you know, doing enough prospecting or being great at converting interest into paying business. Yeah, those are all skills that you can learn. But there is nothing in my experience that trumps that energy of just showing up committed. I'm committed to serve. I'm here and I'm showing up even if no one's online. So if you're going to do a Facebook Live, you do a Facebook Live and you can see you might have no one on with you, but you just show up and you just give it your all anyway. And I think that is the superpower.

Yeah, it's a commitment to yourself above.

Anything, really. Right. Because that's the commitment ultimately is I've decided to show up and I'm going to show up. I love that. I love that because I think there's a lot of people. I had this flashback while you were talking. I went to a, you know, like, motivational speaker thing when I used to have a job job, and this guy was standing at the front of the room and he was doing an experiment that I thought I had figured out. Right. And he said. He held up a $10 bill or $1 bill or something and said, who wants this?

So in a room of like 150 people, I got up and walked up the aisle to get it, and he looked at me. I was crazy. He was like, what the heck are you doing? And I literally shrunk away in total shame. Right. And of course, that was the whole point. And he ended up giving it to the second person who got up and took it. And I. But I. That commitment to yourself before what you think others will think of you. Right. You know, being an entrepreneur is really living on the thin side of a knife blade. Right.

Like, it's.

You have to be willing to.

Believe in what you think the world needs much more than anybody else does if you're going to be able to get and convince others and persuade others and influence others that they need it, want it. So I love that. I think there's a lot of truth to that, just in general. Like, do you commit to yourself first?

Well, you do a lot of retreats, and I'm sure, like, when you're negotiating with hotels or whatever, there's a point where they're like, okay, you need to make a deposit now. You need to place a deposit. This is holding the space. And it's like, that's the moment, you know, when I'm in. It's all in.

I've worked with clients who were trying to fill retreats. I mean, it's a lot easier now doing things virtually. But when they were doing events in conference and they were like, well, I'm not going to make the deposit because I haven't had a booking yet. And I'm like, it doesn't work like that. You're not going to get a book in until you make that so interesting.

Yeah. And the retreats are a great example because I've been doing those for 10 years. This will be my 10th year. And I was just telling someone this the other day. It used to take me almost a year to fill one retreat with, like, Six people.

And I did it every year. One year maybe three people, another year maybe seven. And I just was so committed. I've been so committed. And so it's so cool because this year I'm doing actually four and that. Right. But the commitment that, like, this is on my heart and I'm going to do this. I've gotten so much pushback. Why is it always in Hawaii? Why is it going to be so far away? I can't go to Hawaii without my husband. I can't go to Hawaii without my family. Like, all the things. And I'm like, listen, this is where you have to go if you want to work with me here. So commitment to yourself. I love it. And for women who are CEOs, I feel like that's even more.

Important to remember. Like, do you keep an honor not just in sales, but in your. Do you keep an honor, your own commitments to yourself?

Well, going back to your story about the dollar, and you know that when he looked at you and like, what are you doing? And you felt all that shame. And it's like, I think as women in particular, we so much conditioning around other people's opinions of us.

Yes.

Much more than men, I think. And I think. I think I know for me personally, I've had to, like, shed a lot of that in my entrepreneurial journey.

It's hard to survive if you don't.

Yeah.

So there's less levels of shame. It's like, oh, good, I got through that one. Like, that one, I would pass with flying colors now. But then there's. We just keep sort of. As we grow and expand, we have new levels of vulnerability, I suppose is the way that I would say, yeah, always new. So here you are running this beautiful business. What would you say is really the most potent and powerful leadership lesson you've learned?

I was about to say, is it leadership? But yes, it is. And actually, this has happened and really consolidated since I did your program, which is. I'm just now really clear that my life has to come first and my business fits in around my life. So I walk daily now. I've got lovely woods near my home. And.

That'S before anything. I go and do hot yoga, which was something I always used to love. But I had so much stories like, well, it's too time consuming. I can't do it. And it messed up my hair and I won't have to time to blow dry it and all these things. And then I just got really clear last year, and I'm like, I'm Sorry. I'm just not doing business unless I get to do it really on my terms. I think that is leadership, first of all, just modeling that, but also, like, having that in my business, that my. My team understand that. And. And actually, I. I value it for them, too. I don't want anybody in the business who's, like, in sacrifice.

Mm. Ooh. That was well said. But what. Anybody in the business who's in sacrifice.

That'S not good for business, is it? If someone's there and they're getting the job done, but they're doing it with an energy of resentment or just sort of unhappiness. I think energy is really powerful, I think. And I think it does play out, and I actually think clients are more sensitive to it now. I think that you might have been able to get away with that 10 or 15 years ago, but I think clients really, they sense it if a business is unhappy.

Well, there's plenty of examples of that. I'm sure you see them. Right. Lots of businesses that look really happy.

But don't operate very happy. Right. And I would agree. I think that there's so much more transparency today that. That gets harder and harder to pretend. And I hope that there's. This is another conversation that we've been having is, you know, there's always been so much attention on helping people who lead be better. Right. So that employees and team members have a better experience. But I also think that team members are starting to become more aware of their own expectations for what they want. And so we're. I do think we're in a little bit of a revolution here as. As to what work looks like. And what I love about what you said is so many women start businesses because they want to have time, they want to have freedom, they want to have the luxury. The luxury of a flexible schedule. Right. And then we start these businesses and put ourselves into these jobs that we're working 12 hours a day. Then once that starts, it gets very hard to pry people away. I know one of the things that I struggle with or I struggle to help my clients understand is it's really not that big of a deal if it's not done today.

Unless you are. Unless there's dying babies. This is something that my former colleague and I used to say, like, really, it could wait till tomorrow. Your health, your time, your life is much more valuable. I love that you do hot yoga. Do you do Bikram or do you just do, like, a hot yoga?

Yeah. The studio I go to, they do have a couple of Bikram classes. Well, they call it 26 and 2 now because he's been discredited, hasn't he?

Oh, oh, I don't know the rules.

Oh, well, go, go and check. There's a Netflix documentary. Very interesting.

Oh, interesting.

But I do. I really like the Vinyasa flow. I've really been hooked on that.

Yeah, Bikram's a little. I did one Bikram for a while, one studio, and she wasn't nice, the person who led it. It was very intense and weren't allowed to leave the room and it was scary.

Yeah, that sounds scary.

I know, but I'm. I've had such, you know, pandemic fear that I haven't. I haven't been able to get myself into a yoga studio. And I would love to, but I just. The sweaty bodies, I don't know. I'm having a hard time.

With my germaphobia. It's not a good thing. There's always a guy. There's always a sweaty guy. No offense to the sweaty guys, but you know what I'm talking about.

There's always.

Anyway, okay, back on tasks. So you were in the how to CEO program. You did a lot of really great things when we were doing our work together. And I am kind of curious what sort of was the lasting piece for you out of that that you've integrated into your business that you've been able to apply over and over and again, whether it's wisdom or an actual practice.

We started using suite process tools and that's just been amazing. And now to get to the point where my assistant is, you know, I was like really involved in it setting up, but now that she is, like, creating processes, she's about to go on maternity leave and is training up, like someone to step in. And I haven't had to have any involvement in that at all because it's just all there, it's documented. So that's been incredible.

That's so good. And I want to sort of echo what you said because you said I was very involved in the initial part of that process. And I, I think that's the part that a lot of us sort of are frustrated with, that we have to do that part. But the future self investment, right, that's what you're now reaping the rewards of. Like, okay, I made that investment in time and all the thoughts and the energy that I had to put into it. But now you can have an assistant go out on leave and your business is going to operate without you having to dive back into that role. That's beautiful. Right.

Because there was a thing that I became aware of when I was in your program was a thought that I had that had stopped me up until I was in your program. And it's the thought, it's just quicker if I do it myself. And that is true in that one moment. It's quicker if you do it yourself. But until you actually go and create the documentation so that you can hand that over to someone else, it's not quicker because you're stuck in that over and over. And yeah, it was in. In your program was when I became really aware of that thought and how it been holding me back.

Yeah. And you know what? That is a sneaky thought. Like, I even will. It'll even pop into my head, oh, I'll just do it. It'll be easier if I do it myself. I'll just take care of it. It'll be easier if I do it myself. And that's just such a lie, because then the next time, guess who's going to do it? Right? So, absolutely. I think that's powerful. And those are one of those sneaky ones. I know. One of the other thoughts that I've heard clients say. I had one client specifically, she would say it all the time. She would say, you would think that someone who is, you know, 50 years old would know how to do this, this, and this. You would think that someone who's making $100,000 a year would understand how to do this, this, and this and this and that little thought. You would think, like I said, no, they don't think. Yeah, you think that, but they don't think that. But it prevented her from having the conversation she needed to have, from explaining what she really wanted done. Right. Little thingy things that we think that get in the way.

Yeah. I remember the great phrase that you had was like, if you want someone to read your mind, you have to write it down.

And I have to give full credit to Brooke Castillo for that one, because she said it. We were on a podcast. She's like, oh, my God, I'm brilliant.

She said it, and she was so impressed with herself. So I will give her all the props for that, but she's damn right that's the only way. And the pain of taking an idea. I'm going through this right now because I have asked somebody to create a landing page for the Sage CEO program, which is my next offer, my next program. And she said, okay, great, just get the copy over to us. And I'm like, okay, right. Because I have to actually, if she's like, give it to us in the order that you want it. I'm like, oh, no, no. Can I just plug in somewhere? And someone knows what that needs to say. Right? It's so hard. Listen to me, I'm having a tantrum. But that's the same as explaining to someone how to onboard a new client.

Well, I think it's because for a lot of the things that we're documenting, we've already got like unconscious competence.

Yes, yes.

Like you don't have to think about it. So actually it is hard to slow down and go, what is step one? What is step two? Actually, no, I now realize there's a micro step in between step one and step two. And like I. It was like a mental workout and I definitely used to get tired because it was like it was just working muscles in my brain. I don't. Obviously I don't think the brain has muscles, but it was working part of my brain that I wasn't used to working. And so it did, it did. It could feel tiring. But it's so worth is like working out at the gym. You've got to go, yeah, my muscles are a bit sore. But you know what, just keep showing up and doing the work.

Just pay off that hot yoga, that gym thing. Yeah. Okay. And so how do you work with your clients? Do you work with them in a group? Do you do private coaching? What do you do? What's up?

Yeah, so my main program is a six week program. It's prerecorded content and then I do live coaching with them in a group twice. I do it that way because I'm like, look, if I want to transmit information, then that totally can be done and prerecorded.

Right.

When we get together now, we're, we're doing transformation. And this is. So you bring what's coming up for you, what's getting in the way of you implementing this, and then, you know, I coach them through it.

Okay, cool. And so the goal that when they're done working with you is.

So my main program right now is called Simple 100K. And I teach them a very simple method for getting clients organically through a Facebook group. So at the end of that six week program, they know what the protocol is, they know what they need to do, and I've actually taught them all of the steps so they're ready to just go and apply it.

That's awesome. Okay, great. So what's next for you? What's Your next kind of.

Do you have a.

Do you have a thing like a. A big goal that you're planning on?

I've been talking about it for years, but I am definitely getting a book published this year. I will self. I'll self publish it, but I have. This is why I was nervous, I reckon some part. I knew I was gonna make this announcement.

Oh, well, here we are. Let's do it.

So I'm making that commitment. Yeah.

What's the book gonna be about?

Well, I'd like to do it around the sort of simple 100k theme because I think there's so much drama about all the things that people think they need to do to reach that income goal in their business. And I just wanna show people. No, it's so much simpler than you think. And you just got to focus on these things and this is what makes that result inevitable.

Good. Well, congratulations in advance.

Thank you.

Very exciting. I'd like to write a book this year too.

I'm surprised you haven't written one.

I would have thought. I have.

I've written.

I wrote one like real one like 150 plus pages. And then I've written two others that are a smaller. They're like guides, for lack of a better word. So they're like 40 pages. They're not as extensive. So. But. And I did just write another one last week that's going to be another kind of how to guide that somehow right now I think it's just called the Survival Guide for the Depleted Female Entrepreneur.

Wow.

Because we have a lot of us out there. There's a lot of people who are tired.

Yep.

And when you don't know how to lead and manage a team, you're even more tired.

Yeah. Because when you're tired, the people that are there actually to support you, it doesn't feel like support, it feels like a burden.

Yes, exactly. And then you treat them like they're a burden, which sort of perpetuates a circle that isn't a cycle, that isn't really healthy for everybody. So. But it's understandable. You know, we were talking about you, right. Like you finally got domestic help. And, you know, not only is that a process of posting a job and hiring someone, but it's also the work you had to do to believe you were worth it, to not feel guilty about it. Right. There's so much else that goes into that for women. And so I watch so many women who have. Are running seven figure businesses and these huge family lives and feeling overwhelmed by it. But not asking for support and help.

I really think we're at a point just in the world that we need to figure out how if we're going to step into this space and claim more space in the leadership world, which I think we should be, how do we also take care of ourselves and honor ourselves better?

So. Well, with that support, I had to. I had a story. I'm unsupported. I had to consciously work on that belief. And what I did was I looked for evidence every single day of how life was supporting me. So I lie on my bed and go, okay, I'm supported by the mattress and the mattress is supported by the bed frame and the bed frame supported by the floor. I really did it.

Yeah.

But I got really good at it and I started doing things like when I go to the airport to get on a plane, I've asked, look how supported I am. How many people had to show up to work today so that I could get to take this flight. And when you start thinking like that, it is mind blowing.

Lovely. What a lovely frame of mind. Yeah, that's beautiful perspective. I love it. I love it.

The people that made the meal that they put on the plane, the people that loaded them, the little cans, you know, the little drinks, they.

Your baggage, getting there with clothes in it, all.

The things, they're actually calculated what number. I'd like to figure that out.

No, I think that's really well said because. Yeah, that thought I'm not supported is so poisonous too. Right. It's not healthy to let that simmer around in your brain. So. Okay, so as we wrap up, I'm curious if there's. What's the last bit of wisdom you have for our listeners today?

My last bit of wisdom is that they should do your program.

I'm glad you gave me the opportunity to say this because I've been meaning to make a video for you and I put it off. But what I loved about being in your program is I think there's different levels of teachers. So I think there are some teachers that have really great information and they can share this information with you and that's cool. It's like you're going to get attacked tactic, you're going to learn something. And then there are teachers who facilitate transformation. So those are normally the ones that will get dive in with you and coach you and show you your brain and actually really help you implement. And then I think there's another level of teacher who is like facilitating transformation through their presence and through their consciousness. And like me you are that category of teacher. Like, that presence right from the start of your program. Like, it really did settle down my nervous system. And I had so many beliefs about. This was an impossible area for me. I had so many stories. But it just meant that from the start, I trusted you. And I trusted you enough to really give my all to the program. And I did show up to every call and do the homework and everything. But it's because of who you are and who you were being as a leader of that program.

Wow. I'm incredibly touched. A little speechless. I didn't pay per to that to say that anybody who's listening, and I'm very grateful for that because I seek the same.

So.

Thank you. Because I seek the same. I think there's a level of visibility, and we want to be seen, and we want to be seen for all of, like, I love the word that you said. This level. A whole other level of consciousness that we can hold this energy for one another and see each other in a way that most people aren't seen and aren't. I think a lot of people aren't comfortable being seen. But I have an incredibly high bar for myself and who I give my attention and energy to, which is why I'm pretty discerning about who we invite into our program. That's also been really fun to watch who comes in and experience their growth as well. Thank you for that. And that just really.

Validates what I guess I want to create. So thank you.

Yeah, you're wonderful. Okay, well, if everybody listening needs to learn how to sell and get more clients, where can we tell them to go?

Come on over to Bernadette Doyle.com and I have a free PDF which is about helping you to get clients. And that sort of kicks off connection with me and will lead to invites into my Facebook group and lots of other masterclasses and fun things.

So all the good things. Well, listen to me. Bernadette is the real deal, you guys. There's a lot of traffic and a lot of noise out there. I actually had an experience just the other day. I was got kind of fallen. Fell into a funnel that I was like, ooh, ooh, right. I got all excited. Such good copy, such a great experience. And then terrible delivery. Oh, and I find myself incredibly disappointed. Right. Like, I was going to write a meme that just says, could you please be as good as your copy says you are? Because you can't just be good at copy. You have to be good at delivery. Right. And I think when you talked about earlier. Like, people are becoming more thoughtful and they can sense when the energy's off or when there's a. When this. When the business is unhealthy. I think we're all getting that way even now. Like, I am. So I get so frustrated when I think I found something that could be useful, only to find it was just somebody who really took a really good copywriting class and didn't really learn how to step into the game of delivery. So all this to say that Bernadette's the real deal, you guys, and she offers incredible value and is just lovely also.

And we can't wait for your book.

Thank you, Chris. So you better get it now. I've announced it here.

Yeah. I think we have about nine months left.

Well, exactly. It's like I said, oh, I'm going to have a baby now. I need to go and get pregnant.

There we go.

Well, getting pregnant in this case is as easy as picking up one of these and getting a cup of coffee or tea, since you're in Northern Ireland and sitting down. Emma, putting some earbuds in and cranking out, because you know it's there with you, right?

Oh, for sure. Yeah. Yeah.

I will share this one other thing with you. I know I always go long, but we were in Hawaii, and one of my clients, Tina sue, was she in with you? I can't recall. No, you were right before her. But she came to Hawaii and she wanted to start a program, and she said, well, I have to clear my calendar and I'm going to have to work on it. I'm like, no, you're not. You're going to wake up tomorrow morning and you're going to Write out all 16 modules and you'll be done. Yeah. She's like, I am not even. And so for sure enough by 10:30 or 11 the next day in Hawaii, like, oh, my God, I totally did it. I'm like, yes, you did. Because it's in you. When you birth a book that's in you, it's really just creating the space for it to come out. It's not. If you overthink it, you complicate it. Yeah. Yeah.

Thank you. That's great advice. Yeah.

Just. And write it. This was the advice Brooke actually gave me when I wrote my first book. And it's great advice. Write it to that. That one client that, you know you want to hear it, whoever is that person that you're like, no, this is for Jenna or Mark or whoever, because, you know. Exactly. And then you speak directly to the client. It's really good.

Brilliant.

Thank you. Of course. Well, thank much you so for being here. It's lovely to see you. I appreciate you. I'll see you soon. Yeah.

Psychiatrist.