A Well-Resourced Woman and Personal Agency

A couple weeks ago, I decided I was going to do a special podcast focused on the well Resourced Woman. And after some thought, I decided and recording a few of the episodes, I thought, no, you know what, I want this just to be on Leadership is feminine. This belongs here, doesn't belong somewhere else. And so the first episode dropped a couple of weeks ago. And now we're going to start releasing each one of the episodes going forward. So thanks for tuning in.

Well, hello and welcome to this next episode of the well Resourced Woman. And today we're going to talk about personal agency. This is a really, really tough one for me for a lot of reasons. It really is like, it makes me emotional to talk about. There are millions of women on this planet who do not believe that they are worthy of their own life. They think other people are supposed to make decisions for them. They think they aren't supposed to argue, they aren't supposed to resist. They aren't supposed to have an opinion. They think that, that they are supposed to abdicate all of the major decisions in their life to someone else. They accept horrific behavior from other people, their partners, their children, their parents, physical abuse, emotional abuse, psychological abuse. They accept this unknowingly. They just think it's how you live your life because they're modeling so much of what they've already seen. Maybe that's how their mother lived her life. Maybe that's how their grandmother lived her life. Maybe that's what the culture they live in expects of them. You know, maybe it's dangerous to be anything other than that. I do not stand in judgment of these women. I stand in solidarity with every single one of them. My heart breaks for every woman who cannot live out loud. My heart is always trying to figure out how to talk to her so that she can know that at least she is seen. We know you're stuck. We know that you can't get away. There are millions of you and we know that about you. So I do this work for her, knowing she'll never get it. She'll never be able to leave. She'll never be able to start her own business. She'll never be able to because she is in danger and is in an environment where there, there, it's next to impossible. But most of the women listening to this podcast, that is not the case. There are other millions of women who abdicate all of their life power, their personal agency, to their partner, to their parents, to their children, who do tolerate really poor behavior, emotional abuse, physical abuse, psychological abuse, who can choose differently who have support, who have means and they don't. Same reason they're afraid. But there are people who, and women who, who have their own business, who make their own money, who have built their own empire, who still abdicate out of habit, out of a lack of wanting to what? Emasculate someone or intimidate someone or accept ownership for their own decision making. Most of the women that I work with are very, very in tuned with their own personal agency. But all of us have spaces within these lives that we're living where we haven't fully embraced what that means. Because when I say personal agency, what I mean is total and complete responsibility and accountability for your life experience. It isn't owed to anyone and it also isn't because of or to be blamed on anyone. You are you. And you accept full responsibility for the role that you play in your own life. Which means, see, to me, I find that very refreshing, very exciting, very liberating. I get to live this life as I choose. Now sometimes that's incredibly debilitating. What do you mean? What do I do next? How do I handle this? Where's the roadmap? But to watch women who have all that capability and all those resources and the support and they still abdicate, they do not take personal responsibility, they do not accept that they have personal agency. Because a well resourced woman knows when she's in full embodiment of her personal agency, she knows she can do whatever the f she wants. And see, what I love about that woman is when she's with me, she wants to be. It's not because she feels like she has to be. When she's with her partner, it's because she wants to be, not because she's afraid not to be. When she's spending time with that group of friends, it's because she wants to be, not because she doesn't know what she would do if she was alone on a Friday night. You get that. So if that's you and you're listening to this and the truth is you have all the resources to live into your best life and you are still abdicating elements of your life, your emotional health, your physical health, maybe you're not taking care of yourself. Your mental health, you're not taking care of yourself there, you're tolerating all sorts of BS from people who work for you, you're tolerating it from your family. You have become the appendage to everyone else's dreams, but not your own. If that's who you have sort of been the muck you've been sitting in. Despite all the resources that you have for you to not do that. This is for you. Because a well resourced woman decides, okay, my attention is valuable and the first person who should get it is me. I'm going to start to pay attention to what brings me joy, to what I no longer want in my life, in my business, in my space. I am going to start to draw boundaries for this one beautiful life that I have. Because for those of us who are able to, to have complete and total self possession and personal agency, I believe we have the obligation to. We have the responsibility to live bigly into this life. Why? Because there are other women who cannot. And I will not waste this experience when she is suffering. I will do this so that I may crack a little bit more of the energetic code so that she gets the benefit. Because we do know that as a collective, we are so much more powerful, right? We know this energetically. If more and more women stand in their voice and in their power and in their capacity for what they already have, we change the world. And I want to change it for her over there, who can't do it by herself. She can't. But we can. So why am I tolerating this behavior from this numbskull in my accounting department? Why do I tolerate the disrespect from my children? Why would I ever be married to someone who is so insulting and intolerant and the way that I am? Why would I ever tiptoe around anyone? Not when I have the resources to not do that anymore. Your attention is gold. It is priceless. And whatever you have decided, whoever you have decided to give your attention to, even right now, you're giving me your attention. I value that. Mama. Does everybody else in your life. Because if the answer is no, then you have work to do. This is it. One ride. This life right here.

We're not getting another ticket. Personal agency. If you have the resources, you have the responsibility to do the work. We have to do it for ourselves and for her.