8 Dec 2025 · 12 min
Host Kris Plachy discusses "hiring PTSD" experienced by female entrepreneurs, recounting her own string of failed assistant hires and the emotional impact. She urges listeners to treat hiring as a CEO responsibility: create a CEO job description (myceojob.com), hire proactively before crisis, prioritize roles (assistant or integrator), require skills projects during interviews, use clear 30/60/90 onboarding plans, and set explicit expectations (hours, performance). She emphasizes persistence (a numbers game), adjusting postings/titles, and not personalizing failed hires.
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Hey, I'm Chris Plackey, host of the Lead you'd Team podcast. Running a million dollar business is not easy. And whether you're just getting started with building your team or you've been at this for a while, I'm going to bring you honest, specific, and clear practices you can use right now, today to improve how well you lead your team. Let's go ahead and get.
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Welcome. How are you? I'm so glad you're here and I'm super excited. For those of you who have joined the how to CEO program, we start when I'm recording this. We will start the day after this is recorded or, excuse me, this is released, this podcast. So. And I know there's a few of you that have registered that have said that you found this podcast and sort of binged. Binged, listened to it and just found you at the right time. So I'm so glad our paths have crossed and we're going to get to take the lessons of this podcast and so much more and create your CEO blueprint together. I'm really excited. I'll be excited to share with all of you who listen, who haven't joined me yet, what we're learning and what we're doing together through the how to CEO program. In case you're going to want to ask me, we do not have a current schedule for the next launch, but when we do, we will let you know. Okay, so what are we going to talk about today? We, as the episode title says, we are going to talk about hiring PTSD D for female Entrepreneurs. All right, let's talk about hiring. So, first of all, hiring is sort of a terrible job.
It's kind of an awful. I don't know, I've never enjoyed hiring. I don't mind interviewing. Like, I like talking to people and meeting people. But the hiring process I do not think is a desirable activity.
And that's why I know so many people avoid it. And frankly, I think that's why so many people don't ever get good at it, because it's not sexy and it's not fun. It's sort of arduous. And so what I want to talk with you about is kind of all the things that you need to think about when you're hiring. But the crux of this episode is to help you, because if you are like so many people, including me, who have been so disenchanted with the hiring process, disenchanted with people that you hire, that you thought, oh, this is going to be the person this is it. This is the one who's going to make it.
And they don't.
Right? And it's so hard, I know for you. Sometimes you wonder, is it me? Is it them? Did I do it wrong? For those of you who've been listeners for a while, you know that I have sort of had my own story about this, which has been really humbling and really good because I don't want this to sound bad, but I really have always had really good success with my hiring. I've been a little confident, a little maybe a little cocky about my ability to find good talent and when, however, comma, when it comes to finding my personal. So I have a. I have an assistant who helps me at my house that has been wonderful. I've had a couple of people who we've just transitioned for good. I mean, nothing bad. That's been super easy for me to fill and find great people. My assistant, like the person who helps me kind of with my life and my business in terms of my schedule and my calendar and my travel and you know, it's such a level of intimacy. That role I have really struggled with and I talked to you all about how critical this role is. So I really do know that what a handicap this is. I have people who help me in my team right now which, and they're wonderful, but that isn't their long term gig and we have to, we're going to change that. But my all this to say, I get it. And I got that. I got to PTSD, I think a year ago this time. So 2019, I think I had hired over the course of like four or five months, six assistants and none of them worked. One of them didn't even last like three hours.
And I know that's me, I do not blame them. And so I've just really stepped back. Like, okay, I'm going to give priority to other parts of the business right now, get things cleaned up so that I can get really, really clear. Because that's been the issue. I haven't been clear about what I wanted. And so I wasn't hiring to this sort of read my mind expectation. I wasn't able to communicate, which I'm excited because I'm a lot closer to that. And I will share that journey with you as I go along. So what I want you to hear is I understand that when you make that choice to finally bring someone into your business and connect with them and if it is an assistant role or another role that requires a level of connection and I use that word a lot intimacy with you. It can feel so disenchanting again when it doesn't work. And I know for most of my clients, there's this sort of helplessness, like, really, am I ever going to find someone? So when you start to think about hiring, we have to first make sure that you have a process that you follow. Now, I go into depth in this, in the how to CEO program. What I'm going to give you on this podcast are those basic things you always have to remember. So if you, if you start thinking, huh, I need to hire, that thought usually comes, frankly, too late. If you're now, right now thinking, yeah, I probably need to hire someone to help me with whatever, you probably needed them three, four months ago, and now you're realizing, because there's a pain in the business because you don't have the help you need, okay? So that's one thing, is hire before you're ready. Now, the way that we get the closest to understanding what we're going to need in our business, and you've probably heard me say this before, is to do your own job description as a CEO. And if you haven't done it yet, go to myceojob.com and take the five. There's five videos. They're not very long. That I teach you how to create your own CEO job description, and I walk you through this whole process of, you know, what's in a job description? Why do you need one? What's your current role? What's your dream role? And then I coach somebody through the process of creating her own job description so you can watch a live call, but we have to get to the point where you're really clear about what you want your role to be. Because once you do that, you are able to look at what you want other roles in the business to do once you're no longer doing them. Okay? So it becomes like this hiring strategy. Not just your role, not just your job. Okay? So that's step one. Then when we have sort of this strategy in place, then we have to decide which one comes first. So for me and what I often suggest, it's either an assistant or it's an. It's that integrator, operations, support role, depending how large your business is. It's that, you know, proverbial coo. It's the role of someone who handles and helps you develop all of the operational practices of your business. Now, for a lot of you, if it's just you, you're a solopreneur, you're just getting started or you're, you know, 3,400k that might actually still also be your assistant. That's okay. But that right hand role is the role I'm talking about. Okay. And then depending on what your business is, that really will determine what your next step is. For me, what the other role that I really knew I needed was a content copywriting strategist to support me with my digital presence. And I know how I kissed so many frogs on that journey.
Because of course, that level of intimacy is also crazy. For someone to be able to hear what you do and then translate that and hear your words and translate them into written copy that you don't produce. In the world that I'm in, it's incredibly important. So you have to do that work. You have to think about your business as a CEO, not as a woman who needs help. There is a difference. As the CEO, what does your business need to grow? And then you get help. You ask people to help you. You either write the job description. Now, if you do the myceojob.com, you're gonna get a job description template. How to write one, which it's not really that hard once you have sort of the thought process that goes into it that I teach you. So you write out that job description if you need some help. Maybe you've never. You don't really know what a marketing manager does. You don't really know is this the right job title? You gotta, you know, vet that out. Okay. Then we get some job descriptions going. Then we gotta go through the process. You have to post it in the world. And there are so many places you can post jobs. It doesn't just have to be. Indeed. And then you need to have some sort of process through your interviewing. That's not just about questions. It's also about proving their skill. I think a project, something that's related to the work. Don't just take your own brain's word for it that they're going to be amazing. Make them show you why they're amazing. We fall in love with candidates. I call it candidate crushes. And then we just are gaga and we think they're going to be amazing. And maybe they're not. Okay. Then they go through the interview, then we make the offer, and then we have to have a very clear onboarding process. And that's part of what I also teach, which is a 30, 60, 90 day. Everybody needs one when they start. Everybody needs a 30, 60, 90. Okay? So those are the steps. And I know I'M breezing through those. But the. Because this call or this podcast is about hiring ptsd, I believe that there is a core belief that somehow we think that when we go to all this trouble to write the job description and make sure our values are clear and our expectations are clear and we make a really beautiful offer, and we have our 30, 60, 90 day plan, and we set up their schedule for the first, you know, month that they're with us. And we really have this belief that when we do all of that, that they should be amazing and it should all work out.
And it doesn't, and it's so frustrating. Well, maybe then you try again. All right. Well, I had, you know, I had seven other candidates. They were. Look. A lot of them looked good. I'm going to go back, I'll find another one and bring another one in. And they don't work out. And at this point now you're kind of like, wait, okay, wait a minute. What's happening? What's happening? Am I doing something wrong? And, you know, this happens to my clients, and I know. Are there things you could do differently? Probably. Does it help to have someone to kind of vet that through? Absolutely. But here's what you can't do. You can't give up on hiring, because this is a process that you have to fail your way through to success. And if you stop hiring, you stop the pipeline of potential magicians to come in your business. So I had to work with a lot of people who would help me with my copy and help me find my voice. But then I found her, and I wouldn't trade her for anything. But when I was trying to find that person to fill that role because I needed the role filled, I was so frustrated. I wanted to just give up. Like, this is impossible. I'm never going to find somebody who can do this. Maybe what I want doesn't even exist. Maybe my expectations are too high.
No, they aren't. You just have to. It's a numbers game. It's like dating. It's like anything else. Right? It's like if you try. When you try to buy a house. Nope, that's not it. That's not it. And then all of a sudden, there's the house. Same thing in reverse. You're trying to sell your house. Your house is on the market for three months. You got all these people who come through it, and then finally someone comes in and they're like, oh, my gosh, it's my dream house. It only takes one. But if you decided after two Days because you didn't get an offer, you don't sell your house anymore. You're not going to sell your house. So hiring PTSD is a drag on your business. When you take failed hires personally, you impact the success of the business, regardless of your own success. Right. Do you see that? Like, we personalize that failure, but its impact extends beyond us when we personalize it. And hiring failures are not personal. Right. When it doesn't work out with somebody that I've worked with, that's not personal to me. I don't have a personal angst or animosity towards them, which just wasn't the right connection. It wasn't the right fit. And frankly, I take responsibility for that because clearly I wasn't clear and that it's frustrating because it's like, oh, right. I mean, some of the things that I have found over time. We recently had someone, and she was lovely, and we said, you know, we want people to work during normal business hours, which in my mind is clear. But she worked at night, she kept working at night, and we don't work at night. So that meant that people were coming into work with all this work to do that could have been done the day before, but because she didn't do it during the day, she did it at night, it was really just messing up the flow of business. Right. And we reiterated the expectation, and she really just couldn't meet it. And that wasn't personal. That was a decision that we just had to make. You're a good human, but this isn't the right place for you or for us, and that's okay. But we can't let that make us not take action. So if that's who you are right now, you've been a little beaten up by the hiring process. First of all, stop believing and investing and indulging in this notion that you're terrible at it. You probably just need a little guidance, a little tip here and there, which of course, you know I would always love to help you with. Hopefully I'm giving you enough in this podcast that you can do that for yourself. But mostly, don't give up. Change where you post, change the title of the post, Change some of the responsibilities. If you're finding that those are not coming through on the candidates that you want, be sure that your expectations and values are very clear. If you're finding that you're hiring people and their behaviors are not what you expect, expected, be sure that you set a really clear expectation of how much this job will take in terms of time and how many hours they should expect to work, what the hours are, how will you assess their performance? Make sure you have a process for that. Just do a dissection of what is in place and what could have been missing. And then do it again. And then do it again. And then do it again. Your person wants to work for you, but they can't find you if you're sitting in the corner.
Sucking your female founder thumb because you're so frustrated with hiring. Okay. Promise. Get back out there. Let's go. You got this. There's amazing people waiting. Let's go meet a few today. All right, Have a wonderful, wonderful day. I'll talk to you again next time. One more thing before you go. In a world of digital courses and online content, I like to work with my clients live. Because I know that when you have someone you can work with, ask questions of, and meet with, you're so much more likely to get the success that you want. So head on over to howtoceolive.com to learn more about our very exciting, very exclusive program just for female entrepreneurs. We'll see you there.
