https://www.listennotes.com/e/1c64467da03a4adcb5e5a93d7ec9f00f

A couple of weeks ago, I decided I was going to do a special podcast focused on the well-resourced woman. And after some thought, I decided, and recording a few of the episodes, I thought, no, you know what? I want this just to be on Leadership is Feminine. This belongs here. It doesn't belong somewhere else. And so the first episode dropped a couple of weeks ago, and now we're going to start releasing each one of the episodes going forward. So, Thanks for tuning in. Okay, so hi. Next section on well-resourced woman is money. Now, money, I think, is what most of us think about when we think about being well-resourced, right? We have money. We have not just enough, but abundance when it comes to money. But there's a whole relationship that we have with money, and that's where we're going to start this conversation, right? It's funny, I was talking to my girlfriend the other day We hadn't talked in a while and she, her first question, she's like, so how's your money? And she asked it of me kind of like, it was a friend or like, how's your hair? How's your teeth? Right? And we were talking about normalizing, like, let's normalize us asking each other that question. How's your money? How's your money doing these days? Right? Women don't talk about their money, which is part of why we still have so much work to do. around money, right? Money, guilt, money, shame, money, embarrassment, money, modesty, all the things, right? So for purposes of this conversation, first of all, I want us to think about money as an entity, right? Now, we know that money mostly is just this tangible representation of energy, right? But I want you to think about it as an entity. Like if money had a personality, if you had a relationship with your money, Right? How would your money describe its relationship with you? What would she say? How would she say you treat her? How would she say you engage with her? How would she say she feels about being with you or around you? How would she say you talk about her? Because of our long history, there is a real gap, I think, for many women when it comes to financial acumen. And I think it's very important that I stress, and I think I stressed this in the first episode, but I am also working on becoming a well-resourced woman. So in anything that I talk to you about, I am not standing, you know, high on the hill preaching to you what needs to be done as if I am like this excellent example of it. I am telling you what I know to be true, because I have the good fortune of being around and surrounded by so many incredible women. I have learned so much about all of the topics I'm teaching you that I am also still working on. And relationship with money is absolutely one of them because I will tell you as a young woman and all the things, a terrible relationship with money. I love money, but my money thought I was abusive. Right? And I didn't really care about it because as soon as I got it, I got rid of it. And so I didn't have a lot of financial acumen. I hated balancing my checkbook, right? Like, do you guys remember that? I don't. Do people still do that? My mom did, man, right? Like, you write a check and you immediately put it in the register and you do the math, right? Do you remember that? Like, I hated that. When the debit card became a thing, which is hard to imagine that didn't ever used to be a thing, but it didn't. you used to have to go to the bank and withdraw cash or you had to pay with a check. But when the debit card became a thing, I was liberated until that became a credit card. And then I was in debt. Okay, so our relationship with money starts when we're very young, and it's usually a mimic of what's happening with our family. We either do exactly what our family did or We do the opposite because we don't like the way that our family, mom or dad, manage money. So what is that relationship that you have with your money? The second thing is your acumen. How much do you understand money? If you're a business owner, there is an expectation that you are really good with money, but I know a lot of business owners who aren't. They don't budget, they don't forecast, they have someone else do their books and they rarely read them. They have someone else do their taxes and they don't really understand it, right? They never look at their money, maybe once a quarter. They don't know what their profit is. They don't know what their expenses are, right? And so if that's you, don't be upset about it. But let's ask why. Because what is money? Money is your freedom. It's your ticket to abundance. Sure, we need to have the other pieces that I've been talking about, time and health and energy, right? But money, is the currency literally of living your best life. So why do we ignore it? Why do we abdicate it? Why don't we understand how to invest it, how to make more of it, how to make money, make us money? Now, some of you listening will say, I do do all that. Fantastic. I can assure you the majority of people listening to this do not. I know a lot of business women who own their own companies who give their money to their husband. their husband manages all the money. And I have been on the other side of watching girlfriends no longer be married to those husbands who don't understand the first thing about their money later in life. So a well-resourced woman isn't just good with money. She claims her money. She is empowered to have a robust, honest relationship with money. She doesn't see money as a friend or a foe. She sees money for what money is, which is an asset. It is part of her arsenal to living her best life. A well-resourced woman has a intelligent, honest, ongoing developing role and relationship with money because she knows that the only person who will ever curate her money, her asset, the way that she needs it curated is her. So the smartest person in the room when it comes to your money should be you, not your bookkeeper, not your CFO, not your partner, you. And anywhere that that is not currently true, you are under-resourced, which means there is potential for a black hole in your acumen and competence when it comes to your own asset. And that absolutely has to change, especially because I know the women listening to this are running multimillion dollar businesses and it doesn't surprise me. So I really want to normalize. If you're running a $3 million business and a lot of what I'm saying is feeling like, oh, true to you. I really don't want you to take that as like, there's something wrong with you. It is so common, right? Like so many of my clients, we've talked a lot about selling businesses. A lot of my clients want to move through that process. Women are really at a disadvantage. They don't know the ins and outs of selling a business. And then when they start getting involved in the idea of selling a business, guess who's selling them everything? A bunch of male advisors, because there's not even a lot of women involved in the profession. So we don't have natural, you know, women aren't standing around at the pickleball court talking about their business sales. They're not talking about the money that they earn. Men are. Men talk about the deals they've closed. Men talk about the kajillion dollars they're going to put towards this new thing. Women don't. There's a lot of shame and a lot of guilt around money when it comes to successful women. Like somehow you will be ostracized. And actually it's not even somehow you will be ostracized by other women. I just had a client say to me the other day, she's trying to sell her business. She's like, I can't go talk to my girlfriends about selling my business for $25 million or whatever. They don't, they won't have the first clue about understanding that. And she's not wrong. But do you ever ask yourself, why? Why is it not normalized that women, little girls, young women aren't taught to build a relationship with money and to be proud of it and to seek guidance about it and to be overt about it? Do you ever ask that? I mean, we know the history and there's a lot of people who are trying to shove that, shove us back down that history. I'm not going. I imagine most of you aren't either. So your acumen is required. So if there are dark spaces in your relationship with money right now, personally in your business with any of the people, any of these potential partners that you have, bookkeeper, tax accountant, CFO, partner, business partner, life partner, assets from your family, stocks, Investments, any of these spaces, like one of the things for me that I'm working on is the investment stuff. I don't understand it very well. I have money, I have a lot of money invested and I don't understand it. And I hate that because I have really just genuinely just trusted other people and I'm not smart enough about that. I want to learn more about that. So that's on my list. And I have a real belief about what I want my portfolio to look like. And I have yet been able to create that because I have more to learn. And I'm 55. Like I wish I had learned some of this when I was 35, but I didn't. And I was certainly not encouraged to, but that's not anybody else's fault. I'm not blaming anyone. I just think it's interesting that we are not taught that. If I were going to recreate school, I would make school so different. than it is today for everyone. And one of them would be this, how to pay your taxes should be like by the time you're 15, everybody should understand that because 15 year olds start making money. So financial acumen is a vital resource for a well resourced woman. And if you know you have work here, then get to it. Pick one. Maybe it's just forecasting. It's just working with whoever in your business will be able to look 90 days forward, not backwards. We look backwards all the time. Who cares? Do you know what's coming and why? What's going on with your personal assets? What is the goal that you have? Do you know how to get there? What is the nest egg you need? You, you, you, you, you need if you have desires to not work. and by when? Do you know where all your money is and do you know how to access it? Do you have a relationship with money that you feel good about or do you want to hide anytime somebody wants to talk to you about money? It's okay either way, right? My CFO and I have a relationship that still, that when I pay my taxes, pay off my big credit card bills for my business, we do it together because it's still so triggering for me from the behaviors that I had when I was in my 20s that were really bad. And so it's just easier to have support, which is of course going to be one of my resources that we're going to talk about. But having support, I'm not above saying to her, okay, let's do this together. And that way I know it's done and I feel support while I do it because it still triggers me. I'm just full honest with you guys. Be honest with yourself. We need an honest, adult, intellectual relationship. with our asset, which is our money. Okay? Get it. Make more money. But in the meantime, pay attention to the money that you have. I'll talk to you next time.