Tactical Advice Won't Save You, But Self-Trust Will

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Hey. Hey. And welcome to the Leadership is Feminine podcast. I'm Chris Blackie, your host, and today is the final segment of the Female Founder Self Trust and Self Worth Real masterclass that I created. You can access the video of this by going to the Visionary CEO Trust. You'll have access to the index I created, which is super cool. It's about 20 questions. You can take the questions and then once you're done with that, you get a really cool summary of where you have tenderness, where you have opportunity, where you have success, and. And you're demonstrating strength as it relates to self trust and worth. Self worth. But then we also are linking that to the live or to the video that I recorded. Live. It's not live anymore. But we have also broken that video up and been sharing it with you here on the podcast because I think a lot of you. I've learned over the years that a lot of my clients prefer to listen than to watch simply because of your life. So. So what is this last episode about? This last episode is sort of designed to pull it all together. And many of you know that I run a program called Sage, and there's differing sort of entry points into Sage. I'm launching a new entry point here coming up called Sage, and we're calling it a mini mastermind. It's 12 weeks long. It's a way for you to work with me, sort of get your feet wet. We're going to focus on the beyond the CEO content that we did a few. Well, now, by the time you hear this, it'll be a few months ago to really look at and plan and be intentional about what you want the end of your business to look like. Even if you don't have any interest in closing it down anytime soon or ending it, I want you to be conscious of that because a lot of women aren't. But this episode is. Is really pulling together all of the root topics around self worth and self trust. And what I want you to really ask yourself is what would it mean to you to be unshakably believing in yourself.

To the point that you knew? Like, I don't need to worry about that anymore. I trust myself. I know what to do. I know how to answer this question. I know how to make this decision. I will walk in the room with confidence. I don't question whether I belong. I question whether other people belong with me. If we're honest. Right. How would it feel to have that kind of resonance in your life?

Right.

To utterly have total and complete ownership and agency over yourself in a way that I believe that despite our success, a lot of women still struggle with. So in this last episode, we're going to talk about how we know that you're not alone. If you are a high achieving woman, but you still struggle with doubt, you still second guess. And I want to talk to you about how true transformation happens. When you trust yourself and you recognize your own inherent value. We stop overworking, we stop over explaining and or running your business as a personal identity. When you start embodying self worth and self trust, you lead with confidence, you set better boundaries and you fully embrace the way that you want to run your business, the way that you want to live your life. This last episode I talk about a client of mine who I recently had a call with and what a journey she has been on. And I'm so proud of her. From when we first met and she was struggling in a business partnership to where she is now, where she completely owns this business and is hardly in it anymore and knows that she doesn't have to wrangle these staff issues that she used to wrangle all the time that would keep her limited. Right now she's asking much bigger questions and she's asking really fun questions about her life and what she wants to create. I hope you find this last episode inspirational and it gives you a vision for what you would like to see in your life as a leader, as a business owner, as a woman. And what is possible. There is so much more possible for you. You've just touched a fraction of it. When we step into learning how to trust ourselves more and truly embrace the worth, the value that we have simply because we are, how that absolutely changes the trajectory of your life. Let's go. So I was having a conversation with a client the other day who I've worked with now for quite some time, several years. And when she and I first started working together, she was in the process of trying to figure out how to get possession of a business that she was in a partnership with other people. And her, she didn't trust herself. She didn't believe she was worth it. She was getting beaten down honestly regularly by these men that she was in partnership with. And there was, there were a lot of tears and a lot of fear, a lot of fear. She had gotten in over her skis even though she knew, she knew what she wanted, she saw it, she knew it could be done, but she just didn't know how to stand in it in her own voice and, and her own agency. Right. So fast. Forward few years later, she bought them out. When I met her, I think she was, you know, running like a $3 million business. This year she'll clear 10 million. She's actually acquired another business. And our conversation was so different because.

She had taken the entire month of.

July off, traveled with her family, done all sorts of amazing things, didn't bring a laptop, didn't bring a phone, didn't feel bad. Team is operating really well and our work for this year is for. For her to really discover now that I've done all this, what do I really want now? And it was so cool because in the conversation she said, I don't need to worry about like the managing of the team and the. I don't worry about that anymore. I don't feel bad about that. I don't feel guilty for being out of the office. I don't care about it. I just don't know what to do with myself when I'm not in the office. It was so refreshing and so exemplary of what we're talking about. And she's not the only one. I have worked with so many women who have either gotten to the point where they sold and then they're like, oh, what are we going to do? And they moved out of that using the business as their identity kind of place and moved into this other place in their lives and also stayed in the business. But don't operate the business as their wubby, as their emotional litmus where they either use it to feel bad or feel great. Like the business just gets to be the business. Your life gets to be your life. You feel good or bad based on just what you're thinking about in the day. Not because you're worthy or not worthy, not because you don't trust yourself, not because you question yourself, not because you doubt whether or not you're the one who should do this. It's gone. It goes away. You dissipate out of that which you realize how unnecessary it is and how much lag that creates. What I like to leave you with is a couple of thoughts that what does it feel like once trust and worth are integrated into your life? Self trust. Self worth. A woman who possesses inherent self worth and self trust. She doesn't overwork, she doesn't overproduce, she doesn't over explain, she doesn't over prove, she doesn't hyper function anymore. She lives in resonance, not relevance. I love that.

You have great boundaries. You say yes when you mean yes. You say no when you mean no. You rest. Not because you're exhausted. But because it's vital you know that rest is part of your superpower. You indulge joy, you indulge your desires. You don't apologize for what they are. You don't make excuses. You don't. You don't come up with stories for why you're not in the office, or you don't come up with stories with why you don't want to do the things that your friends want to do.

You just say, no, that's not for me.

I'm going to go do this instead. And that would be really fun. Do you want to join me? We make more invitations and we don't accept invitations to things that we're not interested in or that we no longer need. When we integrate self trust and self worth, you build your own inner authority. You have a both compassion and foundation. It's a knowing that you can rely on yourself and that you are inherently valuable. This is your Sage era. Your wisdom is vital. Your knowing isn't just for you, it is for us. Because at the sage, at the point of your Sage era, we need you too, to help all of us move forward, to model for women like this is possible. And there's permission here for you to become her. It isn't arrogant, it isn't selfish. It is your right as a human. The path for high achieving women and founders who are ready to lead their lives and their businesses is through this work. I know that oftentimes what you want to know is how do I know how to hire someone, how do I know how to fire someone, how do I know how to have this conversation? How do I know how to make these decisions? And what I want to say back to you is, sure, there's always tactical support for that and we have that. I have all of that. I've built that nine times over. But until you become a woman who believes herself and believes in herself, it won't matter because you won't take the action in the way that will help you. You're asking for a surface level problem when we have to address the root cause. Why are you so uncomfortable firing people? I mean, you could google that shit right now. You could go on ChatGPT and ask, hey, how do I fire someone? It will tell you why haven't you? That is the work of developing yourself into this Sage version who trusts herself, believes herself and believes in who she is. She doesn't need other people to validate that. We do this work in Sage coaching for female founders. That is who we are. Sage is Reserved for women who are performing at peak levels, who have built the multimillion dollar businesses, who have achieved pillars that they never thought they would achieve. And a lot of people ask me why, why, why these women? You know, I run a business, but.

I, I make $200,000 a year.

Why can't I be in Sage? And I want to be really honest because I think it's important that you understand I'm not trying to be exclusionary. I'm being honest. It's because the conversations are very different between a woman who's still trying to figure out how to build a business and make money and a woman who has built a business and is making the money and still doesn't feel like she deserves it. It's a very different conversation. One is not more important than the other. But where my skill set lies and where my experience lies and where my wisdom and intuitive knowing tells me to be, is in the circle with high achieving women who are still unsure of their footing and who in many ways don't know how to admit to that or how to share that without feeling incredibly vulnerable. Because most of my clients are the women that all the other women are looking to in their industry, in their space, for their guidance. So where does she go when she has to work through her vulnerability? She comes into Sage where it is safe and honest, and she is with other sages. So I hope that this masterclass, the way that I have presented this, has given you food for thought, given you ideas to consider, and also helped you know that there is a space in place for you to work through where you are right now. And that if you are not in command of who you are and you are still questioning and doubting in a pattern that you're done with, and you want to build on top of that, then I really want to invite you into Sage Coaching for female Founders. We work on all of the elements that we've talked about here regularly. We also provide tactical leadership and management support for you and people in your business, managers in your business. And every quarter we have a topic that we dive deeply into. So when you go to the website, you'll see what our current quarterly topic will be. And those are based directly on the experiences of the clients that we're working on or working with. We pull that directly from them. And what I've noticed in the years that I've worked with female founders is there's a lot of, we seem to go sort of collectively in these directions. And so my job as a coach and as a teacher and as someone who provides guidance, is to assemble the resources, the questions and the conversations that we need to have that are relevant to that collective movement. Because it definitely seems to be that way. And I've noticed that for years. So that's what Sage is as a container. It's live coaching, it's live teaching, it's audio and video support, and we cover a lot of really great ground. It's also exclusive and reserved for women who are running multimillion dollar businesses, who are successful in business, who are successful in their life, but are still asking questions about themselves, still second guessing themselves, still not quite trusting their decision making and not really sure how to evolve out of the version that they are into the version, the next version that they want to become. So thank you for tuning in and I'll look forward to our opportunity to connect sometime soon.

Everything that you've already created. I know it might seem crazy to say that you don't trust yourself, but I have found that that is really true. And what I have found is that trust is not linear. It falls in different categories as female founders. There's visionary trust, there's money trust, there's love trust, there's communication trust. And then and so I built an index for you as well as a masterclass and I want you to have it.

It's free. It's a powerful tool for you.

Both of them are for you to get some insight into yourself. So go to TheVisionary CEO Trust so we can start this conversation and stop you second guessing yourself, questioning yourself and kind of having those like cringe moments where you wonder if you said it right or did it right.

You're doing it.

Great job. And I want to give you more tools so that you feel more confident, more empowered and more emboldened as the amazing person that you already are. Go to the Visionary CEO Trust, take the Self Trust index and get access to my free masterclass on self trust and self worth for female founders.

Let's do it.