4 Tips to Support Your Partner’s Growth (Without Losing Yourself)

The intention of wanting your partner to feel supported. Even when I have a crazy day and you just check in with me, like, what can I do? How can I help? Even just that makes me feel so much better. And it just creates a beautiful habit of prioritizing each other's dreams.

And we're back.

That's another episode of He Said, she Said. Okay. Okay. So, Chris, you have been on so many interview calls for people for the Mastermind.

Oh, my gosh.

That you and I are doing, like, so many incredible calls. But what I want to know is, because so many people who are listening, who might be thinking of joining, or who are just hearing it for the first time with this Mastermind, what are you finding is kind of the pain points that, you know, that we can solve in this Mastermind. As everyone is getting on these interviews and telling you where they're struggling, I.

Start by saying this. We're 85% sold out. So we're like right there at the finish line. And I think I mentioned last week we're at that tipping point where we have now made enough offers after interview doing interviews, as many spots as we have available. So at any moment, this thing is pretty close to sold out. So it's like do or die time if you think about applying. But you asked me, what are the common threads, why people are saying you're applying? I would say this. The perfect applicants that have gotten invitations extended at the end of our interviews together, they've been enthusiastic. I don't know why, but I just love that trait in people. They said that they've been doing it on their own. Like, I literally talked to a couple today and, like, it's just been us. It's just us. And they're doing great, right? They're making a couple million dollars a year. They've got a great business, they're making a big impact, but it's just been us. What would happen if we got outside opinions? And another example of that is there's a different couple that joined. And, boy, we have an increased number of couples that have applied this year. But it's for individuals and couples. But we have another couple that joined. I did their strategy session last week. Under the theme or theory of when you're just doing things that you've always done the past couple of years based on what you know how to do, you miss low hanging fruit right in front of you. I saved them over $350,000 by moving one thing that they're paying for in house to become a new business that saves them 350, and then we'll go on to make probably, you know, seven figures for them. You don't get those type of do this type of breakthroughs if you don't get somebody else's opinion, whether it's a coach or mentor or your peers, which are other really talented entrepreneurs in the room. So I think, in short, if you have been doing everything on your own, even if you've been successful up to this point, like the couple I just talked about, you don't realize that you're missing multiple six figures, if not multiple seven figures.

Well, it's so easy because you get wrapped up in the business and the problems and maybe you have to let teams go or hire teams. Like, there's so many things that you get stuck in. And also, I think the other really cool thing about masterminds, whenever we're in them, and I do masterminds with a bunch of women every single year, two different groups, is that you get to learn what is working the best in their business and what's bringing in their money and what's bringing in the most money for them. And a lot of times there's a version of that that you could apply to your business. And you're like, wait, oh, there's. Look at all these things that are working. Like, what, who did you use? Is that person hireable? And a lot of times they are, or it's someone that they could use or something that they could do. So that's what's really exciting about Masterminds. But today, speaking of all of this, we're going to talk about how we support each other's growth and how anyone listening? Whether you're a couple, whether you're someone who has a business partner, whether you're a person just in the relationships, how you can support each other's growth. We're going to talk specifically as a couple, but you can apply this as friends as well, so.

Or business partners.

Okay, so the first one that we are going to start with is something super basic, just syncing your calendar together every week. So every week I'm going to ask Chris, what do you have on your calendar? What time are you done this week? Are you available for dinners? What can, you know, do we sync for dinner? Like, we sync up our entire calendars if we want to be working out.

What time are we walking each day, all that.

Are we going to go on a date? Are we going to do one date during the week? What are we doing this weekend? So it's just really getting on the same page instead of having those surprises. I don't know about you guys, but we've absolutely. Before we sunk up our calendars, I'd be like, what? You're gone Thursday. I thought we were going to do something together. Like, I was looking forward to that, or I made these other plans, or I told this person we'd go out to dinner. So what the calendar syncing does is it really just gets you guys on the same page and making you feel like you're getting what you need. So if I feel like I need a dinner with Chris, I'm going to let him know. This is the perfect spot to talk about what you need for the week from your partner.

And I want to clarify, when you say calendar sync, we're not, like, literally overlaying electronically Lori's appointments over mine. We're sitting down and having a quick meeting. Okay. What does your calendar look like this week? What does your calendar look like this week? Where does it overlap? Where can we come together? Where can we do things? Where can we have dates and all? And how busy is your week this week? Because that leads to number two here.

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One of the things that I've done this year that has made the biggest.

Change in my life, that has made me so much happier and more productive, is to designate days of the week for certain things. So some days are my creative days, some days are my podcast days, my.

Meeting days, my planning for mastermind days.

Or our programs, whatever it is, I have them all set so that my brain really uses a certain part of my brain on those days. But let me tell you what doesn't change, that is how much I log into Shopify every day. I use Shopify as the platform for glossy and I'm so grateful because it.

Makes it so easy for me to.

Actually see every single customer, what is working, where they came from.

It's literally life changing.

And I know that you've probably been a customer who has had an incredible experience on Shopify because they make the shopping experience so easy.

And let me just tell you, this.

Is what you want for your customer because too many people are lost in the process. So you can upgrade your business and get the same checkout that we use at Shopify. Sign up for your one per month trial period at shopify.com happy that's all lowercase. Go to shopify.com happy to upgrade your selling today. Shopify.com happy when you look and you.

See one person has a busier week than the other, we have that weekly check in where we say, okay, how can I support you? And this is the second thing. How can I support you this week? Oh my God, look at your schedule. That's nuts. How can I support you?

And I actually find that I'm asking you that every single day because your calendar is so crazy right now. But the how can I support you? Goes even deeper. Like once you get to know each other's goals, especially, especially during that calendar sync, you could ask the question, like, what are your goals for the week? Do you have any goals that you're kind of shooting for, whether they're Physical, whether it's a goal that you want to get to the gym, you know, however many times that is. But with the how can I support you? I ask. I. I ask questions to Chris as specific as, are you gonna need food tonight? Like, should I have food waiting? Should I have the dogs walked before you get home? Because I know your day is so booked that you may just literally want to fall on the couch in this particular season. And I really want to support him around his physical goals. I want to support him while he's working so he feels good. I check in the morning, and I say, do you remember to bring some protein bars with you if you have.

A pack in my bag today? If you have a packed day, go Isagenix.

But I think that the huge thing about that is just really the intention of wanting your partner to feel supported. Like, even when I have a crazy day and you, you know, just check in with me, like, what can I do? How can I help? Can I fill up your car? Can I go run an errand?

Even.

Just that. Even if I'm like, no, you actually can't. Like, it's just too busy. That kind of creates chaos. Like, it still makes me feel so much better. And it just creates a beautiful habit of reminding yourself that it's prioritizing each other's dreams.

The third tip is, you know, if the second one was, how can I support you? The third one's kind of the opposite of it, and that is, don't talk them out of their obligations. Boy, do we do this. And sometimes, you know, we think we're being caring. We think that we're helping out, but doing things like, oh, it's right. You shouldn't go this weekend. Oh, that's right. You. You shouldn't, you know, book that extra meeting. Oh, you shouldn't go to that dinner with those people. Oh, you should, because, you know, it'd be better to stay home together or whatever. Don't be an enabler that allows someone to back out of an obligation that you know is good for them.

Okay, I have two things with this. So I think it was two days ago, and I hadn't really seen you. We had someone staying here, which was amazing. But I don't get to see you that much because I'm spending time with a friend. And so one of the mornings that I knew was your gym day. And you really. You have these physical goals. You want to make it to the gym on these certain days. And I also knew that you had a trip coming up, so you won't be able to make it to the gym as much as you want. And that's, like, a main thing for you. And so you came to me and you're like, oh, I think I just want to walk with you. Like, I want to reconnect. I haven't seen you. I feel like I just want to take a walk with you and the dogs before I go. And I literally knew that I had the power in that moment to make you have that, to be like, yes, please, I really need to reconnect with you. But you were like, oh, but I won't get to work. I'm like, okay, I want to go on a walk with you, but I think it's way more important that you get to the gym to commit to your goals, and you're going to be happier in the long run. And I know that because I know what you do. And I was like, we're gonna see each other tonight. Let's just. You go to the gym, do your thing, listen to a good podcast, and then we'll see each other tonight. And I know you're gonna be so grateful. And you're like, okay. And you went, and you were so happy.

God, yeah.

And then the other thing is, right now, this weekend, you have a mastermind coming up that you're going to.

Yep. Yeah.

Practice what I preach that you're an attendee at. And I know a couple weeks ago, I probably could have started whining or complaining or saying, I miss you, or I'm about to travel right after. And I know that I could have probably gotten you to change it.

Oh, yeah. I would have backed right out.

Or I also could be making you feel guilty right now, like little things. And we don't even realize this. So, yes, I say things to him like, oh, I'm going to miss you this weekend. But I say, but I'm so excited that you're going and doing this, because it's not just growth for you, it's also growth for us. And we know that it's so important to go to Masterminds. We know it's so important to build a network. Like, we really need to keep building our network, and we know that you're going to get something great out of it. So instead of when you kind of not necessarily complain about going, but when you're like, God, I just really wish I could complain.

I never want to go to things before I go, then I might be. I went, I don't need. No, it's complaining.

Right?

Like, I would Love to just jump right in on that complain train. I really would. That's my natural inclination.

I'd be like, have a weekend, God damn it.

I just want to hang out with you this weekend. But instead all I'm doing is really focusing on what I know he is going to get out of it and.

Reminding him the fourth thing. Go the extra mile. And I feel like I've been trying to do this lately. You have. I know that you're busy right now in like a crazy busy season. I'm in the busy season of my life. But because we may not see each other as much because we're not doing as much together, I want to make sure I'm still showing up big and supporting you. So I'm trying to go the extra mile. Everything from like taking out the garbage extra fast without you asking, or I know it's a little thing, but like dumping out and redoing the coffee in the morning when normally you do that kind of thing, or making sure that your car is washed every time that you go out there. That I had the car wash guy come by and wash it in the morning before you start your day. Like, I'm trying to go the extra mile and make your life easier and give you these little moments of like, hey, even though we're both busy right now, I'm still trying to show up.

Big for you and I feel it and that matters to me. And because you guys, when you get busy, it is really, really easy to kind of think your partner especially because your partner's probably really high functioning and can take care of themselves to think that they're fine and then all of a sudden wake up one day and be like, does this person like still think about me or care about me during these times?

And so these things make you really remind you, like, oh, look, he cared about me today. You got my truck washed.

Totally.

And I feel it. And every time you do it I'm like, oh, that was so sweet. Or that was just like, I feel so thought of. So you guys, we are so grateful for you. We would love to to see you at the Mastermind.

Yes. Here's what you got to do. Hit stop right now. If you want to apply. I'm telling you, we're down in the last moments. If you're going to make over $500,000 in your business this year, most are seven and eight figure business owners in there. But if you're going to make over 500k in your business this year right now, hit stop and go to Chrisharder Me Mastermind. Remember, this is both Lori's and my mastermind. This is the first year she's going to be side by side teaching with me. It's the eighth year that we're doing it. So go to chrisharter Me Mastermind. Again, that is Chrisharder Me Me Mastermind. Click apply. I'll take a look at your application. We'll jump on Zoom, and we'll see if you're that missing piece in the group this year.

All right, we'll see you next week, everyone.

Bye. Bye.