Create Inner Calm and Clarity Through Living Meditation with Dr. Jenelle Kim

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Of the answers we look for in this life really are within ourselves and in the universe around us.

There's so much distracting us from that, though, when you just hold on to all of these things and it's just one big block.

By letting those things go and detaching, actually you have that much more ability and space to connect with all the good things around us. The answers are there. We just have to connect.

Janelle, welcome to the Earn your Happy podcast. Thank you so much for coming on.

I'm so happy to be here. Thank you for having me, Lori.

Oh, I'm excited. I feel like already I know that we, we kind of have done so many of the same things. Meaning podcasting books. I know you're very passionate about movement.

Yes.

And meditation.

Yes.

And something that you had just mentioned was the art of living meditation.

Right.

And I remember when I was getting into the whole personal development world and really understanding that wellness is really what you're thinking, what you're doing, how you're moving, all the things. I had started to learn how to meditate. I was like, maybe I should do this transcendental thing. I got. I did the whole certification for it and I would sit and meditate for 20 minutes at a time. And I was very, very disciplined.

But.

But I'm also such a mover that I would find. Exactly. I would find that my best meditations were actually on my runs or walks.

Absolutely.

Except I wasn't necessarily meditating. And then I realized years later that. Yes. So this is the conversation I want to have with you is, is just how important it is to understand, like, what goes into making a human happy. Making a human fulfilled, actually, like being someone who is, you know, well, who's like truly well. And I think you're the perfect person to start that means for that I love this whole.

I'm taking it all in myself. Like, am I talking now? This is. I like what you just said, Laurie.

Took me years to figure it out. But yes, I'm really excited to dig in because I very much like biggest things in my life have happened in like what I now know was like a moving meditation or a moving prayer.

Absolutely.

And that has been, you know, it's very easy to forget that we have access to those answers in that way.

Yes.

So tell me about your story, because I know that you are. You have a very long history of what it is that you do, so I'm gonna let you fill us in.

I really appreciate it. I'm also quite have to acknowledge because so many of so many things that you just mentioned absolutely align which we. Which we know is the case, but said very beautifully. So I appreciate that. Yes. I have a long history. I am ninth generation. My lineage, ninth generation even I stop and think about that at times. You know, that's. We're talking centuries. Yes. And what I teach, I. I kind of sum it up in, if you will, three categories. Three pillars.

Okay.

Which I call the three M's.

Right.

Three. Everything in this whole universe, we can get into that maybe later. You can see a lot of times in. In three.

Wait, I have to put a pin in that.

Okay.

Yeah, we have to come back.

And so. Yes, we will. And in this, the three M's are medicine, movement, and mindset. And actually, I'm going to be very transparent right now. Something I just shared with you for the lot for many years, I actually called it medicine, movement and meditation. And then when I got to meditation, and I still may describe it this way, I would stop for a moment, I'd pause and communicate what I meant by that. And what I mean by that is what I wrote the whole book on, which is living meditation, which is exactly everything that you. So much of what you just mentioned. Now, living meditation, that phrase, that concept, that principle was not passed down with those two words for, you know, basically thousands of years, even further than the nine generations, because it came from somewhere. What I say is it's actually rooted in the Dao. So I am of the Dao. My lineage is of the Dao, and the dao is the universe. It's first came the universe, then came from Yin and Yang. It's a beautiful principle we will touch on a little bit later, I'm sure.

Okay.

But yes, living Meditation. Why? When I wrote this book, it was important to communicate in a certain way, especially because I made it the title. I thought to myself, based on everything that's been passed down to me and what understand is. How do I put this in just literally two words to have people understand truly what meditation, the way that our ancient masters and teachers taught us and how. How it has helped me to literally survive in this life and those I know who. Who follow the same path and those that I teach. And it is exactly that. You know what hits me? How I would love to answer right now, Laurie. Just the way the reality is around me in this moment. And what I see is that we have so many rules for things. One of my favorite things lately to say is, who made all these rules? Where did you come up? You know, meditation seems to be stressing everyone out. Well, right then and there, I'm of the dao. The dao is very. Can be very profound, but very simple. Okay. And I think it's important, especially in this time of life where there's a lot of overwhelm. And I'll say as a woman running multiple businesses with children, married for 15 years, been with them for 20, you know, tied in my community. Meaning. I understand. And so when we start to put pressure on ourselves, even when it comes to meditation, we've lost the entire principle of it. And there's so many things in this life that I find can fall into that. That bucket, if you will. So we have to be careful not to over complicate things, not to make things more overwhelming. So kind of going to what you were saying and sticking in meditation. That's exactly correct. The way I even start in, in the book, I talk about eight keys of living meditation. And they're basically eight principles that have been handed down for centuries. The first one being, know your true self. That's key number one. And that is our constant journey. I always say I don't expect to get a phone call one day like Dr. Kim. Janelle, I've got it. Like I know myself. I did it. Key number one, check. It's not going to work that way. Yeah, but how do we keep reflecting? How do we keep centering ourselves? How do we keep calming our mind? Because the more calm we can be means we can have all the energy in the world and personality. Believe me, you're not going to take that out of me. But if we can keep kind of centering, being able to rebalance our mind, that is true meditation. And what our ancient masters and teachers taught us Is a lot of many times it's when you fully can put your mind into something. So I love that you just said some of my greatest answers. Maybe this isn't exactly so forgive me or please adjust if I'm saying it incorrectly. But when you are going for a run, when you're moving. Yes. That's why movement is that second pillar when we're start where we connect and when we can really put our mind into something. So if that means you're sitting for sitting meditation, 20 minutes, hours. What I say is it can even take five to 10 minutes of really putting your mind and your heart into something. If you're able to do that, it's better than hours of sitting there trying to do it. Okay. And that's meant. That is meditation. It's a time that you can center, kind of open your mind for a moment, calm and connect within yourself. First three mind, body, spirit, connect to the universe around us. Then I heard you say this too, and not a lot of people mention it this way. And it's one of the most beautiful and comforting things in my life is that all of the answers in this entire world. This is what our ancient teachers, the Taoists, go back 10,000 years. I mean, 10,000. Let's think about this. Mind blowing, right? I constantly stop and think about this. What they taught us is all of the answers we look for in this life really are within ourselves and in the universe around us. And when you stop to think about that, it can be very comforting, you know, that the answers are there, which. So comforting. There's just.

There's so much distracting us from that.

Though, so people don't think that at all.

So how were you actually raised? What did you.

Yes.

Was this incorporated in your childhood? Is this like so normal to you? Like you just grew up this way?

Yes. You know, and it's a funny thing because it wasn't until relatively recently, I'd say the last five years, that it really hit me in that manner that.

That was not how.

This is not. I. Believe me, when I think back, Laurie, I knew this. I knew that my, you know, I was very. My father's Korean, my mother's American. Actually very similar to how you. Blonde hair, brown eyes, so beautiful. My father's Korean, very traditional, as he would say it, but very different than, you know, your traditional, you know, Asian type of culture. Okay. Even in the sense. And I'm just gonna say it, that I'm the oldest daughter and I'm. I've been handed down as the first woman in our lineage to be the. The guardian, the custodian of our formulas.

What was it? Normally, it was the.

Always the man.

Always the man.

Yes. Okay. And my brother, who I'm so close to, my little sister, we all have our place, our role in this, so certainly we're involved. But that alone, which I don't always share, that's not the case. And. And hence I say that my father was my everything, my greatest teacher. He learned, as many will understand or learn from the book, in the mountains of East Asia, like literally from movies with a master. And, you know, he found his way all the way to America.

That's amazing. Yeah.

Much more a different way of telling this, but ultimately, you know, and his whole wish, what he sacrifices is a strong word to use, but I'm going to say it right now, in some ways, sacrificed so much of his life to just sharing this because he knew how important it was to do so. I follow in that. So kind of going to what you just said to me. Yes, absolutely. My life was filled with this. I've also walked through a lot of ups and downs and challenges. So it's not like he was constantly. This is always like. It was something that I had to make a part of my own. And he was very, very big on that. And that's one of the main things, is that we can read books, we can memorize all the things, we can have all the knowledge, but to make it our own and absorb that whatever it is that we're doing. Even skincare works this way. Right. Even our supplements, which is also part of my, as I call my day job, how I even formulate different things, is how can our body absorb it properly? Because you can have the best ingredients in the world. You can have the best principles and philosophies in the world. Right. You can have the best movement in the world. But as us, as human beings, if we can't absorb what it is that we are learning or what it is that we're trying to have become a part of us, it will not. It's a very interesting thing. So I say it that way because it's around me, but also part of that key number one, know your true self is at the end of the day, it's always our choice. So while I buy blood and part of this lineage, it was always my choice if I wanted to actually become a part of it. And until I made that choice, truly set my mind and my heart and committed to this duty, as far as I'm concerned, which I know I Did coming into this life, But I still had to find that it never would have been handed down to me in that way. So it's an interesting way of. I hope that I'm communicating this, but it's important so to understand.

Tell me, like, in your family what that looks like. Because in our culture, obviously, I don't fully understand what it would be like for my parent to say, yes, this is a very important set of rules or thing that you're going to carry forward. I've never heard of that. I've never been spoken to in that way. So were you. You were aware that this way of being existed?

Yes.

But obviously, as a kid, like, that's like, you know, your parents can be really cool. You don't realize it when you're young. You're like, whoa, okay, how did you view that when you were younger? Were you. Were you like, oh, whatever?

Totally.

And then what age were you when you realized what it was and you decided it was something you wanted to carry forward?

Really appreciate that. Lori, Very few people have asked in this way. I say totally because I hear what you're saying. I'll start with the first of the two m's because it's easier to understand that way. Right. So the medicine part has always been a part of my life.

Okay.

Right. And it was not necessarily everywhere, But I didn't even notice. Meaning the certain East Asian herbs I took, even what we put onto our skin and our body equals what I'm even doing now. That was not anything that my family had put out into the world, per se, but it was part of our life.

Okay.

My job to put out into the world as I'm doing. Okay. So that was definitely a part how I eat, like, the nutrition, all that eastern medicine, that ancient medicine way of food is the best medicine, Having just different East Asian herbs, different formulas. You know, again, like I said, topical, internal was very much a part of my life. Okay. So that now, of course, at almost 43, I am. I recognize how grateful I am for that and now raise my boys in that same manner. Everything in balance, by the way. Yeah, the movement aspect, same thing. Martial arts was a part of my life since I was young. It was not forced upon us. But, you know, when we were little, we were expected to do it just like I make my boys do because it's so good for kids. I think the arc society even understands this now for discipline and consistency and strength and all the things mentally and physically.

And what is it you said it.

Was traditional martial arts. Traditional I teach now qigong, which is a part of traditional martial arts. We can maybe get into that also. So many pins, which is, you know, the oldest form of any exercises we know in breath work, but traditional, so more internal, not just, you know, what we think of, like karate or taekwondo, which is important, but for health and wellness. Okay. Then comes the mindset aspect. So this is something that. Yes. Now, when I look back, and even when I was little, I used to think this is what comes to mind is, you know, my father, because I was the oldest daughter and probably because of my personality and everything that I am as a spirit coming into this life, he was the most compassionate, the most affectionate, the most loving, but he was he disciplined. You know, it was different. And quite quite frankly, I raise my boys this way, too. There are certain things that principally. That's like what the word when I say principle, it's something that's, for the most part, is unchanging. There's not a lot of things in that life that fall into that category. But those principles, for example, be kind to others. You know, be compassionate, know the difference between truly right and wrong. You know, hurting someone versus not right. These are kind of, you know, for lack of a better way of putting it, principles. But we would be raised to always reflect. Yes, he raised me much stricter, if you will. Now, I know it was much more than that than, say, my little sister. Okay. And when I did have a time where I would get in trouble, which I honestly was a pretty good little girl and didn't get in trouble much, but I always seemed to hear something. And this is the point I'm getting to. Right. I used to think if I did something that, you know, caused a conversation such as this, which at that time, I realized my father was teaching me all of these things, literally, what's in this book. And that's why it's harder for me to answer just in one, you know, one moment. But, yeah, he would. I would used to think to myself, like, why can't I just be grounded like everyone else? Like, because I would sit there and we'd have these conversations, which, by the way, as a parent now running businesses and doing all the things, how much time does that take? Yeah. Wow. To sit there? And so. So the way I would conclude, answering you is if I really had to think about putting it into one kind of way of understanding is it was so much reflection and awareness, which I do believe maybe this answer would change tomorrow. But living meditation. Meditation, you know, what is that? It is a Reflection and awareness and a constant purification of yourself. Seeing where you stand, what you can adjust, seeing others more clearly. It's perspective.

Let's work backwards from that. Like, let's work backwards from the goal of everything that you do. So when we think of it that way, what is, what is the goal of this, like, ultimately in life for us to experience be all the things.

The goal for me to teach or. Why do we want to learn these things?

Yeah, why do we want to learn these things?

As far as I'm concerned, I couldn't survive without them. Let me just answer right quick.

Yeah.

I couldn't do anything that I do with. With the. And it goes up and down. I'm human, but with the calm that I am able to carry. Oftentimes people, because of the nature of the things that we do, will ask, you know, how can you fit it all? How can you do all of this? I have my moments. Absolutely. But when I really think about it, it is the ability to keep prioritizing, constantly reprioritizing. Right. And being able to calm and in constant states of stress or the unknown or challenges, whatever that looks like. Right. In business and parenting and relationships in community and all of it. And so these three M's, which consist of the medicine is everything I already said, the things we put into and onto our body, how we eat so how we take care of ourselves, True wellness, longevity, beauty from the inside out. Okay. The movement is something that is. I honestly didn't think I'd be teaching it at this point in my life. I thought it would be like much later in my life, but with a book. The movement just came and I started going out into the world with it. And it's really. People are resonating. And it's because to me, it is one of the most powerful tools, methods, is one of the most powerful medicines to be able to very quickly do exactly what I said, calm our mind and our body, no matter what's happening. Through particular techniques of breath and certain movements that have been handed down for, again, centuries, for thousands of years, they've learned certain things that can quickly rebalance the body. You know, Eastern medicine, we understand circulation, circulatory system, but also we talk about chi, which is vital energy which flows through a body in a very systematic way. Okay. And I can talk about this for.

I mean, don't go into it because there's been a lot of times my chi is way off.

Well, that's the thing about being human, and you just said it beautifully. Okay, fine. So in still answering your question. Why do these things? Why do we need. I, I feel compelled, like I can't even get it out fast enough. Lori. Again, I practice it myself, but also for people out there because so much of our society and our culture is not aware of this. Yeah, tools. There's so many tools that, that belong to us. You don't need anything. And here I am, I'm the one who makes the products for the amazing people who put it out into the world. So I'm all about that. But there's so much that there's the answers within us. So you did ask, so I'll go a step further. So within our. It's like Eastern Medicine 101. I went to school for like 8000 years to know this, but I'll do it real quick for everyone.

Thank you so much for doing that.

For all of us. Let's just.

So I can ask you one question and get my answer.

Yes, but it is, it's so important to know on everything we're talking about right now, once again, in the way that we eat, in the way I formulate products, in the way we think, in the way we move. So just remember this. So within our bodies, as I mentioned, so we know we have circulation that runs to our circulatory runs through our circulatory system. Right. And we can picture what that looks like. And many of us are becoming much more aware of when I say chi and channels and meridians, what that is. I'm so grateful for that.

Yeah.

20 years ago when I talked about chi or Marines, people would be like, whoa.

You're like, I'm so grateful. I can leave that part of the explanation out now and get to the.

Stuff exactly like, she must be an alien, maybe. Who knows? Call me. What you know, this is going to help you. So if I were you, I'd listen. And so the way you can picture this, and it is beauty, wellness, thinking, all of it, is that in our body we do have qi that runs through our channels and our meridian systems. So picture it in a kind of similar ish system as a circulation. And these meridian system, these channels connect to all of our organ systems. It connects everything together. And so how I like to think of it, and it's one of my favorite things actually of Eastern medicine, is I remind us all that thousands upon thousands of years ago, when our ancient doctors and masters and teachers started to understand the human body, they didn't have books and they couldn't go to school because that didn't exist. They didn't have pens. They had nature, and they lived. I. I don't remember being there. If I was there, I don't know. But what I imagine is this. And how we understand it in our ancient medicine is that they looked around and they thought to themselves, I wonder if the way I see the trees grow, you know, the things, the nature around me, you know, the cycle of life, how the rivers flow. I wonder if my bodies work the same. And that's the understanding of how Chinese medicine, which began there. I'm Korean. It started going to Korea, Japan, Eastern medicine started to spread, but it all started in China. So thousands of years ago, that's how they started to understand the human body. Okay. So moving. Don't worry. I won't take too long. I love. This is my favorite.

I'm like, go deeper. Get me lost in the story, please.

Oh, don't worry. I can. So they looked around and they thought, just like the river systems, I wonder if that's how it works. And it's exactly the way that it works. Right? So when people come to me, Janelle, what is the secret to beauty? What is the secret to longevity, to wellness? Okay. What I say is if we picture ourselves and this is how we can become aware that we have qi and circulation, blood circulation. So both are circulating through our body. One is yin and one is yang. So one is substance. I did. I started to go there. So I'm going to backtrack just a little bit because it's so important for us to understand. Okay. I said, first came the dow. The dao is the universe. One of the reasons I love to talk about this is that it doesn't matter what religion you are, what ethnicity, what gender, how old. Where you are in the world. Does not matter, because it's all the universe. And from the universe came yin and Yang, just like the symbol that so many of us are familiar with now. Okay, well, on one side is. It looks like a fish. Right. One side is black, one side is white. Yep. But if you look more closely, within that black, there's a little white dot. Looks like a fish. And within the white, there's a little black dot. That's why it's like the fish. And what that exemplifies is it's a constant balance. Never stops. Right? So change is the number one constant. That's Eastern, that's Western, old, new. We all agree. And that yin and Yang is the dichotomy that exists in everything this entire life. That's also. Now we're talking now we're talking all three M's, all three pillars, okay? What that means is you cannot know success without knowing failure. You cannot have happiness without sadness and grief. You cannot have feminine without masculine. Okay? Within our body, you can't have qi without blood. So even in our bodies, going back to that understanding of the river system, okay, chi is the yang. It's the flow, it's the energy and blood. Your body fluids are the yin. They're the substance. And that's what the ancient medicines, how we look at the body. And so ultimately, like a river system, when those ancient Taoists, immortals, looked at the universe and started understanding the human mind and body, they thought, okay, so if I look at the rivers, and by nature, the water flows. And over time, you know, some debris catches, maybe a tree falls down a stick, maybe someone threw some trash in the water, right? And so over time, that creates a blockage within that river. Our bodies are. That is. That is the natural cycling cycle of aging. That's it. And so when there's stagnation, it doesn't flow properly. So the number one thing is to block that stagnation, to unblock that stagnation, to remove it. And that's one way of understanding our thought process, how we think beauty, wellness on every single level. So the. The goal is in understanding the eight keys of living. Meditation, the mindset, the movement that I teach, or any kind of movement for that matter. Right? The medicine aspect, the formulas we put onto our skin, put into our body, the food that we eat. The ultimate goal always has to be that everything is flowing and functioning properly. That's it. That's like, literally the secret, in my humble opinion. And what's been passed down to optimal health, beauty, longevity. And so that's my answer.

I love that mindset, Movement, medicine. And it is really, when you think of it in terms of what you just said, that makes so much sense to me. It's like, okay, we are meant to be a perfectly flowing unit.

Yes.

Like, yes. If you look at nature, when it's working, it really works. And it usually clears itself out from.

When it doesn't work.

Unless, you know, we get in the way.

Yes.

If somebody is listening to this right now and is just like, man, so many of those areas that you just said, right. Are, you know, maybe I'm struggling with, of course. Where would you say is a great place to start? Is there a way to find out what is most blocked or is there something we should focus on? What did you.

What would you say? Absolutely. Okay, so How I would answer that in this moment in time, which is where I go to teaching. That is why the original question was, you know, how important is it to get this out right now? It is vital. Like, literally. We need this in my humble experience. But I couldn't live without it because one of the quickest things, for example, is in any. Well, okay, to answer, it's calming. Calming the nervous system and calling the mind. Because so much of our society and the way that we're living right now is so amplified and so heightened, you know, and everything in balance. I have I mentioned before, Let me be the first to say I have tons of energy. It doesn't mean we walk around and we're not talking and we're. No, that's not what I'm saying. But it's when we really do feel uptight, when we're. Things aren't flowing properly. And the more. So many times we're not even aware. So to answer what you're saying, Lori, I find that so many people just are not even aware of their own condition. And remember, know your true self is key number one. Like, you can't do anything in this life to achieve happiness. Or I don't love happiness to achieve balance, because happiness can come and go.

Yeah.

But calm balance in life, which ultimately brings us security and allows us to do all the things. So I would answer, the number one thing we need to do on every level is to kind of calm everything. Interesting way of, you know, communicating. But that's.

That makes total sense because back in the day, I did a lot of Tony Robbins stuff, and he would always say, you can't make a good decision from a bad state. Like, you need to first work on your state, which is a beautiful state, which is what you're saying. Like, find some form of calm. So it's like if your life is in chaos, you're making chaotic decisions.

Absolutely.

And you know what? What we both mentioned before, where you're like, okay, every answer is accessible. I really believe that because I've seen it in my own life, and I know when I'm not getting them right. That it's me. I didn't always know that at all.

Yes.

But whenever I'm not getting it, I'm like, okay. It's sometimes hard to diagnose you as a problem, of course, because sometimes it feels like things are just there. It's just like life is lifing and it's happening. It's hard to get back to figuring out how to be calm or, like, how to find that beautiful state, right? So let's say that we're like, okay, we know we need to do this. What does that even look like? What does that start to look like in everyday life?

Okay, so one of the things that just hit my mind, especially when you mentioned what Tony Robinson said, and I don't remember even exactly what you said he said, but it reminded me one of the things I love to share and I was definitely taught in my life and is reacting versus responding. I love to. Since the moment we started this conversation, you know, words. I was very much raised that way too. Words are very important to the most part I do. You know, I'm natural, I think also very important just being a natural human being, but really thinking about what we're talking about and what we're saying, right? And so I don't want to go too far off tangent, but going back to responding versus reacting, I'll create certain words and then wish to share it and teach it, because to me, I've made that mean something. So to me, reaction, and that's everything we've been talking about right now, is based on emotion. It's rooted in that. It's always the ups and downs of life, right? And listen, we need that. We're human. I'm not saying don't, don't have emotion or, you know, be stoic per se all the time. That's not exactly what I'm saying at all. We need all of that. But at what point do we have that run our life? Okay? And so reaction can be, you know, the ways that we're eating might not be good for us, and then our body naturally will have reaction to that. For example, literally, to be very. To be very literal, we could put on a skincare product and we can have a reaction just to kind of get this understanding in life. You know, whether it's our children, whether it's a relationship, whether it's driving down the street and someone made us upset. Like in life, if we start to look at it this way, reacting versus responding. What I mean when I say those words are every moment take a pause in any one of the things I just said. But particularly in the act of life, especially when we're walking through or get stunned by a challenge or a stressor in that moment, we all have the power to, even if we have to act quick. And I know there's many times in my life I have to have quick, so there's really no excuse. You can always take that breath, like an actual tip and tool That I wish to share. Breath work, one of the reasons it's becoming so popular right now. But listen, this is thousands upon thousands of years old. We both just did it naturally. It naturally grounds you and you can feel it. That's step one of being aware of yourself. When you start to become more aware of yourself, you can feel when you're chi, all of us can. If you can feel it when it starts to rise, you can. It doesn't even have to be a negative thing. We can get excited, all the things, but we check in, we take that breath, always pause, even if it's for a second. You have a second, I promise. And then you start to train your mind with the mindset. The third pillar to me is a training of the mind. We know how important it is to train our body, but it's so vital to be able to train or discipline our mind. It's very ancient medicine. It's very martial artist of me to say, but it's vital. And these are the ways, These are the tools that we can do this. Each one of us has to find something that we absorb and are consistent with, right? But they're going back to react versus respond. You have a situation come in front of you, you take a breath and you train your mind to very quickly teach yourself, okay, if I do this and I react right, and I react in a big way, you know, maybe I get upset at you and I immediately yell at you. You train yourself to look, okay, if I do this right now, what's going to happen? And let me be very clear, I'm a warrior. There's a time where that is the correct thing to do. If in that moment, the correct thing to do is to yell at somebody, you yell at them. But what is your purpose and where is it going to lead? That's the part that we have to train ourselves to be aware of. To me, that then goes into. We're not just reacting based on our emotion and how we feel. Because remember, emotions always come and go. They're up and down. And if we let life, which is what's happening with a lot of people right now, if we let that rule our life, you will absolutely have anxiety, stress, panic, so many health issues, your skin, you'll age faster. All of the things reaction is very bad reaction and stagnation, no good. Now, if we can even just pivot a bit and we start to be that much more aware and we start to respond. I put something to that word, right? Respond to me is in balance, just like that. Yin And Yang, you're coming on strong. Okay? Maybe I'll even come on strong also. But where am I leading with that? Where are we going to come up with the solution? Okay. And I'm going to say one more thing that I hadn't said. Really. This is more recent and it's. And it's more extreme and intense. But something that I have found has really helped myself in life and many, many people around me that are in my personal life and that I teach and it has to do. It really comes from when I lost my father, you know, nine years ago now. And what I will often say, not often, but what I say often lately, I suppose I'm saying that correctly, is by losing him very unexpectedly in the way that I did it was one of the greatest gifts that ever happened to me, which sounds crazy to myself as well. What I mean by that is through that, I learned how quickly life can be gone. Okay? And that's why I don't love to. I don't want that feeling. I don't want to give that feeling to people. So let me say where I'm going with this is that when you start to look at life like you don't know if tomorrow is going to come, say you're in a fight with somebody, maybe you've been in a fight with them for years upon years, you know, all it takes is one moment. Actually, that's key number six. I don't talk about as much. Change your reality for the better. It's like a flip of a switch. The mind is so powerful. And when sometimes things can literally last for lifetimes and it's in one moment, you make a decision to flip that switch and your whole. Everything can change. And so when we start to think about how. How important it is, it. How we respond versus just reacting to someone. And if you start to think one step further, what if they're not around tomorrow? What if you're not around tomorrow? Does it really matter? Life changes. Something different happens. And it doesn't have to just be in a relationship that way. It could be work, stress. It could be wonderful things, too. Maybe I need to make this leap right now because if I don't do it right now, what if something. What if. What if the whole world was not here tomorrow? At least I did it. At least I tried. You know, it's a different way. It's an. It's an intent, more intense way of looking at things. But sometimes we need to train our mind that way.

I think it's really. I think it's really important. I actually, you know, it wasn't my own father, but my husband lost his father. Super. Suddenly kind of found him in a traumatic way.

Yeah.

And we thought he was going to be around forever. He was our. He was the North Star of the family.

Like. Yes. Yeah. The very similar.

So everything. And so when he was gone, we were just, like, so lost, like, didn't know who the family was. Just like, he was the fun, the identity, the glue, all of that. So for us, it was kind of the same thing.

Right.

Where I think when someone hasn't lived through something like that, especially being your own father, it sounds weird to have your life change for the better in such a big way.

Yes.

And, you know, the first year or two is brutal, and then after that, that they start. I believe they leave you gifts, like, everywhere. And I think that was one of the biggest gifts is the gift of understanding how precious this life is and just how. When you can live from that place. I think it's so important, and I think it's really important that you tell that story, because I. I don't want people to have to lose somebody to understand it. Please.

In honor of my father. That's why I say it that way. You know, in many ways, I honor him in that way.

Yeah.

His whole life and everything. Because he certainly would not have made that decision, you know, from me and our family. But, yes, I appreciate that so much, Lori.

Yeah.

So it's. It's.

It's so hard, but I'm so glad that he's. He's left that with you.

I agree.

You know, that the interesting. Just watching myself, because it's so. Podcasting is so fun, isn't it? Because on the other side, you get to not only ask questions, but you get to, like, find yourself in what they're saying and in the stories. And I know you do the same exact thing. So I was just thinking of, with the one moment with, like, the flip of a switch of a decision, because some people might feel really overwhelmed and far from, like, the person that they want to be. Of course, it can happen so fast. Like, I used to be someone who was super reactive, like, in fights with my husband early on, and I was able to figure it out fairly quickly. But what I want to say is that, you know, when I'm in a stressful time in my life and I'm. I'm in a very happy time, but also just a stressful time with having a startup in the first year.

Yes.

So with that said, I think what happens when a lot of stress comes in is that we get these. Our default responses. We thought we were done with or that we healed or solved or I'm not that person anymore.

Right.

Can come back. And so one of the things that had come back for me recently is, like, I'll notice that I'll, like, kind of want to pick fights with my husband or interesting or be like. Like, sabotage something totally. I just. My old ways were, like, sabotaging my life in some way. And of course, I'm going to sabotage the person I love the most or sabotage the relationship. So the other day, we finally get a day off. It's been, like. Like, literally a month where we haven't had a day off together.

Right?

And we got a day off together on a Saturday. And we were together and just, like, enjoying a cocktail, watching the ocean. And I. He had said something that would have never normally bothered me, but I just watched myself be like, oh, that's a trigger for me. And I wanted to dig in. I wanted to fight. And my brain was like, this might actually, like, ruin your whole day if you say what you want to say. And in that moment, I was like, lori, you can either fully enjoy this day and, like, really enjoy your time off in your life, or you can go with the story that you're stressed out and your husband is, like, not understanding and that life is hard and that you're gonna, like, on your one day off now, you don't even. You know, you can't enjoy it. And I just watched the spiral of what my old self would have done.

Absolutely.

And in that one decision, I was like, let it go. And you can have the best. You can either have the best day in the best week, or you can start destroying it all right here.

I love this. I kind of just want to take you with me everywhere and be like. And that's exactly what I mean.

That's perfect.

Thank you. I'm getting very excited in you sharing that. It's so helpful. I'm grateful for you to share that. And it's exactly that way. You know, it really isn't. All the things that I just heard you communicate to us, and I'm in the same boat. You know, we're all, as human beings, we all do this, but it is. At the end of the day, that's us training our minds. It's art. It's a choice that we're making to not just react, but respond. You took a pause. You thought about it. It's also like, it's Almost like I should come up with an understanding or a way of explaining. It's like your iq, like some kind of iq, you know, because that's what it feels like you're making. Or as my father would call like, get a bigger bucket. So funny. I never shared that. And I was at an event and I shared that. I was like, now I have to explain this, but that's what we're saying is that you. You give yourself, you start to build more of a capacity to hold things. That's what he meant. He said, for sure. You know, he called me munchkin, munchkin, go get a bigger bucket. Like, I don't want to hear it. Go figure. And if you can't, you can't. But if you want to achieve what it is that you wish to achieve in life, you. You better get a bigger bucket. Because you're going to keep waiting for everyone else to, you know, change around you. No, no, you just have to be able to hold more. You have to be able to handle more, balance more. So that's not something I usually share.

But it's like, like what you're saying, it's. It's making me realize, like, how it's really confronting. I mean, like, I know it's confronting because I feel it, my body every single day. But I think when people in self development, like, there, there was a whole thing for a while about like, oh, it should feel good. And you. And do all the things. I'm like, nothing that I've ever done to make myself feel better has been like, hold on, I'm. I'm getting in alignment with that. It's always been like, that's hard. That's confronting. This isn't the way that I want to do it. This isn't the way I saw my mom do it. This isn't the way. I know, like, very deep and confronting. So what was something. What's something for you in this journey? Like, the mindset stuff that you. Maybe you. What was the main thing you used to do to yourself to kind of sabotage yourself?

Okay. I very much appreciate that. And I would say it's in every aspect of life. Particularly I think of, like, business.

Right.

Because I have a feeling we're the same here. We've known each other on many things, but we haven't discussed this. But I started very young in business, and, you know, I was a woman, which I, you know, I come from this whole lineage. Now. Everyone knows this about me. So when I stepped into any room, I didn't necessarily Think of that.

Yeah.

I know not everyone has that, you know, experience, so. But the truth is, I was a young woman, like, 19, 20, and. And I'd end up in these big boardrooms or with these very strong individuals. And my number one thing that I look back and I changed. And that's the eighth key of living meditation, which is, are you ready for this? All right. You're gonna like it. Think. Be like bamboo. And it's one that I share often. And it sounds very mysterious and East Asian. Like, I'm like on trees, the Crouching Tiger. But the truth is, I really visualize this as well. So going back, back, I used to bulldoze through, you know, So I have a very strong part. I know that I'm a warrior, and I had a very strong part of my personality that certainly got things done. So I can't even tell you that I regret being that way, per se, but there's no way that would have been sustained. And there's many situations now that that would just not be balanced at all, maybe at that time. And I do reflect on it. It's exactly what I needed to be doing. Yeah. But you can only do that for so long. Long. So that is one thing. Just too strong. Just going, like. The best way I can say is bulldoze through anything.

Was there something that, like, you were bulldozing and realized you couldn't do it anymore, or.

No, it just didn't feel. I came to a certain point in life. Let me think about that. Love, these questions. Lori. Not everyone. Maybe it's when I first got married was, to be very honest, was the first time that I was like, wow, I'm really intense.

He's not digging this.

Yeah. And Craig, oh, God, he's the sweetest in the world. He's also has a solidness to him that listen when my boys. When he says something to the boys, they listen. We're as strong as I can be, and I'm still the mom. But he has a strength in him that makes me stop, which is, I'm sure, why we've been together for so long. Let's get this very clear. But I know because I. You know, because we had such a connection and I cared enough kind of what you're saying, that I was like, wait a second, let me reevaluate this. Yeah. You know, probably then my children, they brought out a whole other side of me. That's the truth. You know, and that is a decision that I don't know if I've ever discussed that I had to think about, you know, where you really do see yourself. If I keep going in this manner, this is the type of. Because if we do things for so long, those habits become us, period. Whether we think, oh, I'd never be that way, Laurie. In fact, something I teach the boys and I think of very often. It's very Taoist in that nature, that balance that I never. How can I put this in words?

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Well, exactly. I say to my boys it is the wisest thing is to never think that you won't be a certain way. Does that mean it? So like never ever say like if you're the kindest person. Well I would never do that because I'm so kind. The second you think you can never do something or you'll never be that way is the second that you're not watching yourself. It's a very profound but give me chills is the truth because you never.

Know what situation you're going to be.

That's right.

You never like there, there's. Oh my gosh, you never know. You never know any of that.

Yes.

Yeah. You never know what would happen. You know it's funny, we can say a whole lot of things in a place of comfort or like a place of, of oh, you know, we have jobs right now or we have money right now or you know, our family, our sense of safety is not being threatened. We grew up a certain way with a certain perspective and I think about that a lot because. And my husband totally won't mind me sharing this because he's a very changed person now and he's always been amazing.

Yes.

But he has not had like the compassion muscle. He just was not. He wasn't really raised with it. Never really saw it. It was just kind of like. Like, very kind of judgmental.

Understand?

Which I freaking love their family. But he ended up. My husband ended up having a stroke, which totally changed his brain and, like, made him extremely compassionate. So now he has this. And that's the gift of that. I mean, which we can say now, but with that said, like, he couldn't.

He was so judgmental.

And I'd be like, okay, hold on, Right? You let. Let's look at how this person was raised and what they fought against and, like, where they're from and the money they have and maybe what they're dealing with. And he would. He would really have to sit for a very long time and think about it and then go, oh, these are the things, though. Like, what you're telling your boys.

Yes.

Is actually removing such hardship from them later.

Because I actually watched my struggle so.

Much when he didn't have compassion, because then he just thought people were dumb and stupid and bad.

Right. You can't connect with anyone. You can't ultimately. Right.

Yes. I was like, which we need. You must feel so isolated, and judging people so hard is so lonely. So I. I love that. I think it's like. I think it's one of the most important things as humans that we need.

To learn is watch ourselves. Easy for me to judge everyone.

And then, like, oh, yeah, that's right.

Actually, I just said it out loud. And I just realized that that's one of the ways I'll discipline my boys, because I'm careful not to. I'm. I'm a disciplinarian. I have all the love and all. All the things as anyone who knows me, but they will not misbehave because I also. We're fighting against a lot of things. Things in our world around us.

Yeah.

And I just heard myself say something that I usually tell them, which if they're, like, you know, acting up and they're good boys, I will say, like, watch yourself. I don't even realize I said that until just now. Laurie and I. That's something my father used to tell me.

Oh, my God.

And what a funny thing to say when you're disciplining someone. Like, watch yourself. And it means, like, check back in.

Like, really watch what you're doing.

Loud. Yes.

That is interesting.

It's an interesting thing, even.

I'm like, huh? Yeah. I just really like that one.

Yeah. But it's. But it is. I. And I appreciate that acknowledgment because it's so True. If I can teach them. If we can teach ourselves, especially the younger generation, to watch ourselves a bit more, you know, be aware. You can only imagine how much more perspective and how much more balance and compassion and all of the things that we would be as human beings.

But.

So we're talking about bulldozing. Yes. I like this.

How are you going? How are you bringing in? So you're bringing in, obviously, the mindset piece when you're raising your children, because obviously this is something you're passing on.

Yes.

To your children, but also to everyone. So we're kind of all. All getting it.

That's my wish.

But the movement piece, like, for everybody who's listening.

Yes.

Like, what are you telling your children about movement? Why is it so important? What do you guys do together? What do you do in your life for them?

Okay. Absolutely. So I don't want to leave people hanging, and I'm going to transition into that because I said be like bamboo and the movement. This is important because I feel like our community, your community, but we're one. So be like bamboo means that oftentimes in this life, similar to what you just said about your husband, I experienced it as well. So many of us in different ways, some of us in many ways feel the need to be so hard and, like, bulldoze through things. This also goes into the movement piece. I find it helps. Some of the. Some of the most effective ways is through movement to rebalance this. But ultimately that be like bamboo. What that means, especially running businesses, especially in the business world, in parenting. Now I'm going to name it all again, is bamboo. What we have to remember is so strong. It's known to be strong. Right. You know, it's a very common thing that it's very difficult to break bamboo.

Okay. I didn't know this.

Okay. And also it has such strong roots. And so the whole point is, I. I loved the phrase for the longest time, go with the flow. It's very dao of me. Right. Go with the flow. But then I started looking around, and you kind of said it too. Like, wait a second, people are going with the flow, but they have no root. Like, that's also very dangerous. That's also not balanced. So you can't just go wherever the wind takes you. Go for it. And at some point, you're going to feel real insecure and not happy.

It's just going to be a tumbleweed.

Yes, basically. I love that. That's exactly right. So bamboo is incredibly rooted. Okay. And it's flexible. So that's that's what I wanted to be very transparent and share it is the flexibility that I have trained myself, taught myself, reflected upon, that has given me the ability to continue to keep growing and achieving everything I wish. The strength. Strength. Because true strength, I find, actually comes most of the time from softness and flexibility. It's actually easier, in my humble experience and opinion, to go and just bulldoze through something. No, no different than martial arts. You know, you just knock someone out, done. Sometimes that's appropriate and sometimes that's absolutely. Most of the times it's probably not the correct thing to do. But be like bamboo is that principle that it's so rooted and so flexible that when all the winds of life, all the challenges we come across, across, pass through, it can lean all the way down, bend. And when those things pass, when that storm passes, it can bounce right back. And is that not like. I know that's my ultimate goal? No matter, whatever happens, I keep bouncing back and keep being rooted in what I wish to achieve in this life. And just like bulldozing or like a rigid board, thinking martial arts again, just like the karate chop, you know, you break the board, it's no different. We think we have to be so tough, so stuck on the way we're thinking. In fact, that's another. Stop. Being drunk on your own thoughts is one of the most dangerous things in this whole life. Key number three. Watch. We've talked about it so much. Watch the way we're thinking. Watch how we're doing this. Because we can literally become intoxicated on our own thoughts. We can't see anything else. We don't see another person's perspective. We don't see another person's pain. We don't under. We don't connect in that way. And that's the downfall of human beings, as far as I'm concerned, not being connected. So I did want to share that. So be like bamboo means you're strong, you're rooted, but you don't. You're not so rigid that, guess what, a couple times. Or they're just the right hit and you break. And that's why I stopped. Lori, you asked me before. Now I have the answer. Because if I kept going that way, I would have broken in my health, you know, in aging and all the things. Because it's not sustainable. It's too intense, right? Something would have broken, you know, And I find a lot of people now, it's shifting. But I find, and particularly in our society, a lot of people would probably, you know, Fall in that same category.

It probably feels really good to explore the other side of you.

It's the best.

Yeah.

Especially, you know, getting into our 40s. I always say, like, listen, I can't stress out about that. Like, I'm in this business. I can't have that many wrinkles. Exactly, exactly.

Exactly. You know?

Yeah.

Oh, my gosh.

I loved.

I loved listening to that story because, you know, thinking of just, like, how when we're taking that minute to be flexible, like when we're taking that moment of just like, okay, where normally you'd want to bulldoze through, or maybe you don't like what somebody said, or I don't like how something is right. It's. It's really interesting because it made me think about. We're always. It's like that the deep roots are just like sense of self. Like a lot of times when you get knocked off course or someone's triggering you or something in life is not going your way. Yes. Like you.

It's.

You're knocked off because you're, like, losing sense of self. You don't have your identity solid, and it feels like they're taking it from you or judging you or doing something. But I love the. The flexibility to let someone rock you.

Yes.

But, like, such a deep sense of self and connectedness to something so much bigger than you and letting it be okay that that person maybe is going to pass by you and knock you over and not understand. But your roots are so deep.

It's like you're not easily.

Yeah, you're not easily moved. And you can't. You can't figure that out. Bulldozing things or getting attached. Because I know when I bulldoze things in life, it's like, it. It's usually like they're not understanding or I'm just gonna make this happen or I'm not gonna understand them.

Right.

And, you know, it's easy just to, like, push through and get your, you know, either get your way or make something happen. But yes, like a deep sense of self. And it's so hard to get that without people rocking you. No, I personally don't think you can.

I think that's the yin and yang going back to the very principle. Mindful of everything. We need all of this all the time, and that's what. If we see it correctly and absorb it correctly, you know, that is how we can keep elevating in life and becoming better.

I love this one because so many people are upset by, like, they're upset when they get the mean comments. They're upset when people judge them. They're upset when the family doesn't support them. And I'm like, you need all of that to figure out who the f. You are.

Absolutely. And listen, we're all human.

Yeah.

You know, if that stopped bothering us completely, I think. Very odd, dad.

Right.

You know, or. Or a little bit different. But, boys, if I'm going to speak on stage or. Are you nervous, Mommy? And I remember when they first asked me that and I turned around and I told him the truth. Yes, of course I am. But let me tell you why I'm nervous. Because I care. The second Mommy stops being nervous, we have to worry because I don't care anymore. Now, the level to my nervousness now is much different than it used to be. So that's another example. But it's because we care.

Is there something that still can rock you?

Oh, everything.

Like, really rocky.

Really rocky. Let me answer correctly. I did. I did answer correctly on one hand. But, um. But many people in my life would probably say not really. It's pretty difficult at this point, to be honest, Laurie, to really rock me. Doesn't mean I don't feel. Doesn't mean I don't have challenges in my life. But, you know, that is all the training that I have to practice what I preach again for my own self. But I. It's just something within me that I've always been this way. There's no way I could be here with you, Lori. There's no way that I could be teaching. If I didn't, you'd find me hiding for a little. That's just. Now you all know it's just the truth. You know something. So, no, it's not so easy to just knock me off.

Are you introverted? Extroverted? I can't tell.

Okay. And maybe you can answer this, okay, Because. I don't know, because there is a part of me that when I'm, you know, in these situations, or I'm sure people would say, you know, I'm extroverted. But I don't know. I often will tell Craig, my husband, like, I don't think. I think I just, you know, I'm this. And he's like, really?

Okay, here's. Someone defined it to me. That made sense for me.

I love that you can't tell I'm telling them.

Well, because. Okay, so here's how I've liked to learn how to define them.

Is love it?

Introvert, like, doesn't mean that you're quiet or shy. Like, because you can be an introverted extrovert, can mean that you can do these situations really well. Like. Like, I would never be able to tell that you are, like, you're not a shy person. You know what I mean?

Yes.

But an introverted extrovert means, like, you need to. To get recharged again or to get. To truly get your energy back.

Back.

You have to go recharge, like in isolation or alone.

Yeah, that is vital to me. Yeah. You know me well.

Yeah. So what are you.

Do you, like, 100. Okay.

And that is something.

Again, more recently, did I realize that I do. Like, I often will take myself out to lunch by myself, like my best of friends who I love, and I'll be like, no, I'm sorry. I'm going out to lunch by myself, you know, but seriously, or. Or funny enough, as the universe would have it as life. I mean, life has always had a lot going on, but particularly in the last, you know, year or two, and particularly, you know, I commute a lot. I now use this word, which I never imagined. From San Diego to la. Let me tell you what happens. You sit in the car for hours, right? And I've thought to myself, like, I would get so much done, someone else was driving, and just sit there, and. And then I thought about it and I almost did it. And then I was like, well, wait a second. There must be a reason why this is happening right now, right? And that's another time now that I. You know, sometimes it's like, all right, get me here. Here. I need to be here Enough. Yeah. And then I practice all my moves in the car. But, no, it's necessary for me. I call it. I love the word nourish. It's very Eastern medicine. But that's the word I use for myself. And I share that particularly with a lot of the strong women I know that I don't love saying, relax. I gotta go relax. It's very hard for me. It's just. I know myself. I'm not going to tell you. Okay, Laurie, I'm just gonna go relax for a little bit.

No, sounds boring.

Sounds boring. Sounds like I can't even say it.

I can't.

Just funny. But I can definitely say, like, okay, this is my nourishment time. You know, I. I will always take my moment during the day, particularly in the morning, usually. Sometimes I don't have that. And then I'll find another time to practice my movement and my. My qigong and my breath work. That's very nourishing. To me, having lunches by myself is very nourishing to me at night, whenever possible. I love having my time to cuddle with my boys. I mean, it's. I. I mean, these are the things that I know I do for. For myself when I'm not traveling. Tons. I definitely do my movement. I like going to my sauna, and, you know, I'm doing the red light. And so these are the things. You're right. You know me well. I need to revitalize that.

And you're a thinker. I feel like deep. I feel like deep thinkers need that time.

Yes.

Alone in that isolation which your car rides.

Yes, I know. So look at that.

You need right now. I know. And you. Otherwise, you don't normally get that, like, you. You don't get that time to yourself. Okay, so movement, what's your favorite form? So you. I've heard you say qigong.

Yes.

I like, started with Jack Canfield years and years and years ago. Do you know who that is?

Yes, I do.

Okay. Chicken Soup for the soul. But he also is like a huge personal development.

Yes.

Train the trainer. I did his train the trainer in 2014, and he made us do qigong there.

Oh, I love that. You know, I didn't even know that aspect. And I have to say, my agent, who is no longer Bill Gladstone, I like just sharing his name always. And Gail, his wife, they're so beautiful, and they are very close to him. And so I hear about him often, but I never knew that. Why he's like, anyone tell me this.

He's literally the best human. Like, he's so multifaceted. I just thought Jack Canfield, great speaker. And he. I. Because the training was three weeks long, from like 7 in the morning to like 10 at night.

Goodness.

So it went in a room of seven people and him, it was like, so incredible. But he. He, like, swore by that.

Yes. So tell.

Tell me why.

So, yeah, so growing up, I just into all types of martial arts, and, you know, I loved all types. But qigong, as I started to say, we're probably going nice full circle here in the beginning, I like to share it and communicate it as it really was and is like the first ever form of exercise removal as we know it. And it really did come from, you know, kind of that same lineage, whether you want to call them this or not. But I will call it like the Taoist immortal. So it's the ancient teachers and masters. I'm again, so that's what that is.

The Taoist is just like dao Is universe daoist.

So they just studied the universe and the principles. We've named them. They didn't call themselves that, I imagine, you know, we're the D. Like, so now you in Dallas, like, I don't think they did that. Maybe they did an immortal. I. When I teach, I lately say that like, they literally wanted to never die. Okay. Oh, I really want to just, you know, look young and have youth and longevity for, you know, a very long time. But they never wanted to die, okay? So be immortal. And the ways that they found to do this was through the medicine, you know, herbal medicine and that type of thing. Eating properly. Same principles we talk about today. But they started coming up with ways that they. Qigong is chi is vital energy. Gong is the consistent study of cultivating your chi. Okay, so like, chi is energy. So in some way you can understand it that it would just be everywhere if you did not know how to contain it properly. And guess what?

This is blowing my mind.

Just because we.

We throw it everywhere.

Yes. Okay. And that's exactly everything we talked about. Fits it. You already see it, like, fits in that category. So when we're feeling out of sorts, stressed, anxious, you know, whatever, we're so happy and elated, our chi, you know, and so what do we do? You learn certain ways to have energy. Right. And constantly keep disciplining it, having it, like I said before, flow properly. Because when it flows properly, it nourishes and rebalances every organ system. Your muscles, your joints, your mind, you name it all. The hormonal system. So they came up with techniques, and they're very simple. They can get more complex. I've noticed that when I started to. One of the first places I ever taught this. I'm always grateful to her because she's my. As like an icon is Diane von Furstenberg. She had a whole thing called, well, wellness. It was about wellness and she wanted to yoga. And then her and her beautiful granddaughter decided because I said, well, through someone like, why don't we do chico martial arts? And this is the first big event I ever did, which I don't really share that very often, but it's so special to me. Hello.

That's awesome.

So I go to flagstip, flagship store in New York, and I'm teaching.

Please tell me she gave me an outfit, please.

Actually, they did.

Now I can focus, keep going.

I know, right? So the point being is, you know, here. So no one knows what qigong is. But when I say tai chi, I should have done that first. Everyone's like, oh yes, I've heard of Tai Chi. Well, Tai Chi is qigong. Okay, okay. It's like qigong is not Tai Chi, but Tai Chi is that kind of thing. So qigong is the first ever form of exercise because these Taoist immortals, these ancient teachers, learn for techniques, in conclusion, to cultivate our chi for optimal health, wellness, longevity, all of the things, okay. Mind, body, spirit.

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And it's the first ever breath work. Because these techniques, which are usually in stances and that's how I teach too. They're stances that really rebalance and connect you with the universe around you. Connect mind, body, spirit within yourself, make everything function and rebalance. And it's all connected with your breath. Right. So as we breathe in, we connect. It's also ways of kind of letting things go. I heard you say attachment. I mean, we don't have literally hours here together. Maybe we do, but if we did, we'd start talking about this. But attachment to things is so important to detach from things that are not good for us. It's like emotion. Yes. Plug. Yes. And time and time again, you know, those who are familiar with this principle understand this and those who are not completely understandable that it sounds a little intense, detach, but actually from nothing. Very dependent. Taoist. From nothing comes everything. That's my number one meaning. The more we can empty ourselves, get rid of the unwanted energy, the things that are not good for us, the more we can get a bigger bucket, the more we can bring in good. Right. And so these movements, very much, although they're very physically good for us, beneficial, they're so powerful for our mental and emotional well being. I actually think it's one of the most effective.

Yeah. It's making me want to dive in more to it. Just because there's, you know, there's been little things that I've done in my life that have been. That have given me so much energy back.

Yes.

And one of the things that I was just thinking of that I feel like attaches into this. Attaches that I detached from. Yes.

Love it.

But it was this idea you're tracking. It was this idea of, you know, when we are attached to something mentally. Yes, we are. That's where most of our energy is going. And so during this time in my life I had had. It was kind of like when I was really experiencing some success and a couple of women that I Thought I was really good friends with, had essentially just whatever the. The old story of, you know, when we're coming up and learning about ourselves, I needed this lesson of these women essentially turning on me, talking about me to groups of people that I love, blah, blah, all the things. Well, I was so attached into one of them in particularly. Who started it? Her energy. Like, so I was. When I say attached, you guys, I'm saying, like, I was eating, sleeping, breathing, what I wanted to say to her. I couldn't forgive her.

Understood.

Every time I went to talk to her, it just got worse because I was in defense mode.

Yes.

And so my energy was so deeply attached to this woman. Literally, like, I didn't understand it until someone said, no, you haven't. You have energetic cords with everything you do.

As I was just going to talk about. So happy you brought it up.

Oh, my God. And she was like, you need to literally picture cutting your energetic cords and standing in front of them and watching it fall and, like, forgiving them. And so I did these meditations, like, just picturing.

Yes.

Like, detach this core.

I could feel it.

I could absolutely feel this energetic. And the craziest part was the realization that it wasn't her attaching to me, it was me attaching to her. And the second I let her go, it's like everything in that world kind of started to dissipate. Now, do I know if she was still talking about me? She probably was.

Was, yes.

But when I detached, it's like everything started to go away.

Of course, because you're not feeding it. Oftentimes it literally feeds it.

It was my unbilled record, too.

That's so important. And I love that you share that you did meditations. I'll show you what I do and hopefully explain it for those who maybe are just audio, but, you know, you again, it's always with the breath, because the breath is literally life and chi. So you breathe in through your nose into your abdomen first. Then you let it fill your chest. You exhale through your mouth, mouth, often time even making that noise. You can do it quickly as you did Lori. Sometimes it's important for us to do it slow. And you literally can be aware of your energy grounding. Okay. It very much calms your nervous system, your brain waves, all the things when we do that. And in Eastern medicine, it soothes your liver Chi. Now here I am opening another box. But just understand, the liver in your body is like the general. It tells it what to do. And so in Eastern medicine, for those this Might. Some people may have heard this, but just picture when you're angry, when you're frustrated, it makes the liver mad in Eastern medicine. And so when you make the general mad, it makes everything very uptight. So you want to soothe them. Very interesting. And so literally, that act of breathing that way starts to soothe everything. Okay. And so really important, you breathe in, you breathe out. Normally, the correct way is. And the beautiful thing is you don't have to have a whole setup. We could do it just now, like, exactly this. I could even do it. And you wouldn't even necessarily know that part. I'll show you the next part. You would know. So you breathe in through your nose. You usually ground your feet. It's all about grounding. Because when you're grounded, you can handle, like the bamboo, you're rooted. It's much harder to move you, you know, and you feel it. And you can make much better decisions even with one breath properly. So the cutting of the cords. As a martial artist and very qigong, like, I teach this at the events. I am starting to teach more and more events now. And so you can do these movements if you're standing, if you're sitting. Quite frankly, I felt this the other day in the car. And you brought it up now, Lori. So I would like to share this. There are times where you say you're just feeling off, right? And okay, there's stressors happening around or maybe some things, you know, some challenges. But it kind of. When you check. When you have a moment to check in, how many of us are like, you know, I don't know why. Why am I feeling this way? Like I know myself. Well, I'll speak for myself. This is feeling. This is not like me. Like, I'm feeling down, let's say. Like, there's just something a little too out of sorts.

Yeah.

Okay. And I actually had this happen. And I know why for the first time, because I don't usually get to that point because I know how to catch myself beforehand. Okay. Through these tools, we all have the ability, and I do because I practice them. But it got to a point probably because I was doing many different things. And it was a very important thing in my life where I did. I had. I was in the car and I. I realized sometimes you don't even realize when you're doing all these things. That's why I was saying, what is going on? Like, I feel downright right now. That's not like me. Okay. And then it hit me. This is not. I'm. Yeah, Enter I have to detach from whatever this is. And then I knew I have to detach from this. Something is wrong. Like, this is very imbalanced. And so you do that breath. And I literally take my hands like swords. It's the martial artist and that warrior in me. And I'll just do this. And it's something I teach a lot of women and men alike at these events. And you'll see me walk around like my best of friends. They know me. I'll walk by someone, no judgment, how they look, who they are, what they have. That's not it. But I'll feel a certain energy that does not feel correct to me. And you'll see me walk away and just literally do this. And I'll just keep walking and, and they know this now. And then, now, now my best girlfriends, they're all cool like that. Now they'll start to do it. So now we're all walking around. I mean, I'm gonna use the funniest thing, but it works because it's Kaylee. And so because you're, I'm not kidding. It, you try it and do it or however that looks to you. But so there's something especially around her head because you, you said, like, the chords that literally you can picture it as, like, attachment. And then when you start having these. I remember at one, you know, event that I taught at, I, I literally showed it one day because I had the ability the time to do so. And I said literally you can picture it as like, attachment. And then when you start having these. I remember at one, you know, event that I taught at, I, I literally showed it one day because I had the ability the time to do so. And I had people hold strings so they visually saw what I was talking about. You did this. And they held the string and I held, held it and kept throwing it, throwing these, like, balls of string out. And by the end, I'm holding all this attached to the other people, had people hold strings, so they visually saw what I was talking about. You did this. And they held the string and I held it and kept throwing it, throwing these, like, balls of string out. And by the end I'm holding all this attached to the other people. And now I'm trying to walk around in life and that's. It's no different when we attach.

Wow, that's a.

To that kind of visual. So what are you going to do? You're going to go and yell at everybody to let go? And now I'm trying to walk around in life and that's, it's no different with the strings. No, you let go of them. Yeah. You know, I mean you have to. And it's not so. A lot of this can sound so simple and I acknowledge that it takes all of these tools. The medicine, the movement, the mindset, constant practicing. That's the form of qigong, right. Or living meditation. It's non stop. But it becomes such a habit to us to check in, to be aware, to use these tools to eat properly, really to put clean beauty and good skincare and different things. And all of this prepares us for moments like this throughout life. Doesn't mean we're going to stop them, but we can handle it when they come, you know. But anyways, you let go of that, you detach. And guess what? As we were, as we both acknowledged before, for if this is a new concept to everyone, by letting those things go and detaching, actually you have that much more ability and space to connect with all the good things around us.

Yeah. You're just, you're, you're making me, me realize and remember also like we are meant to be no matter what age we are energetic. Like energy. I, I believe energy is like, it's our number one like most important commodity.

Absolutely.

When you know the times where you. I think even when we're striving to feel good, whether it's people think it's because they're gonna go shopping or whether they want to go on a vacation.

Right.

They want to feel, they want to feel life, they want to feel alive, they want to feel energy.

Absolutely.

The more that you detach from everything that you just said, the more that you move, the more that you feed yourself. Well, like you're just unblocking the river.

Yes, that's exactly right. I'm so glad we got supposed to getting away.

This supposed to feel good. And you know, I look at people in my life who are really close to me and just the way that I grew up, I don't think that they will ever change. It's just they have a lot of attachment in religion, in family, like in, in religions that are like really bringing them down.

Down. Understood.

And I, the energy is so low like and I meet plenty of people their age who have tons of energy.

Yes.

Very happy.

Yes.

And it's like, wow, we are meant to be energetic. But when you let, when you just hold on to all of these things and things bog you down, you, you won't have the energy. Then you get sick, then you have autoimmune disease.

Absolutely.

You have other diseases.

Absolutely.

And it's just. Just one big block.

Yes. And our ancient medicines, which, by the way, have been in existence. I keep repeating it. Not just Chinese medicine, Ayurvedic. The ancient medicines have been around for thousands of years. They acknowledge this understanding of holistic, you know, in our part of the world that is definitely adjusting now, believe me, like, I'm not kidding. Twenty years ago, when I talked about all this, literally, people thought, you know, yeah, you're in this world. Yes, all right, fine, whatever. But the truth is, our ancient medicines absolutely acknowledge every aspect of what we're talking about. It's not just physical. It's. It's emotional, it's energy, it's mind, body, spirit. It's all of that. It's all part of one thing. Yeah.

Because you can meet people who eat super healthy. Absolutely. But if they have so much mind and anger, they're still gonna. It's not gonna go well.

No, not at all. Yeah. And oftentimes that's when a lot of those people will keep pointing the finger at everyone else and kind of. And you know, to sum it up, you have to look at yourself. That's the only thing in this whole life you can control is yourself. That's it.

Yeah.

We think we can do all the things, but I know it doesn't work like that.

Well, I could talk to you all day long.

I know.

Seriously, literally, I'm just like, what rabbit hole would you like to go down? I don't know what year it is. I don't know what time it is. It's like Sunday.

I'm like, sorry, boys, it's Sunday. It's funny. To Laurie.

And you have your content for the next three years.

Actually, it's a great idea. I know. Isn't that a great idea?

Wait minute, a minute. Well, I'm so grateful for you.

I'm so grateful for you.

What would you like to leave people with? Is there any last thoughts?

Well, I'm just grateful to always be able to share this. I'm here in any of these ways to help you formulate a product based on this medicine, this wisdom. My book is here, Living Meditation. I have retreats now to share this. Yes.

Do tell.

I go to a lot of different events, but there's one that I'll do once a year for now. It's in Costa Rica. Okay.

Okay.

It does fill up pretty quickly. At least last year it did, and I decided to do it again.

Amazing.

So people did ask me, please share that.

We'll link that okay, we'll link your retreat.

Yes. And aside from that, I'm just doing my day job, as I call it, at my lab.

You're amazing.

Day job and doing all the things.

Yes, well, and you have your awesome book, which we're also going to link up, you guys, so you can check that out because this goes into the eighth eight, what was it? The eight.

Eight keys of living meditation.

Yep, the eight keys of living meditation.

And the other last thing which I shared with you, Lori, and it is important to me, so I should mention, you know, I always. I am usually in the background formulating and manufacturing the beautiful products for so many amazing brands out there. And oftentimes people ask me, well, where can I get these formulas? And it's just not really the. The thing to do to start naming off all the people.

Right.

We work with, as I know you understand. So what I did is I did come out with a couple. A couple hero products. These are some of the ones I've loved over 20 years of doing this that I know people would love. So it's a muscle and joint formula for athletes or children alike, not just for when you are feeling discomfort, but for training. It's also. That's like the proper way to use it. So it's a muscle and joint recovery. Roll on. And then I have a face serum and a face oil, both of which take the bee bong or like some of the secret formulas for my family. Ginsengs and Angelica's beautiful herbal ingredients, but compound combine with some of the top of our, you know, modern kind of ingredients. So those two products and I'll have a body oil. So for those who do not have access to all the other beautiful products, at least I have an option. Now before I was like, I don't know, sorry.

Yeah, I was like, this kind of thing.

Yeah. Shouldn't just leave people hanging that way. So the longevity potions, I leaned into what everyone used to tell me 20 years ago respond to straight. They're like, what potions are these? Like, I'm some like with a cauldron in the back. Yes, exactly. There's a. All right. I know.

That's why so great.

That's the name. Anyways, I appreciate you. I love that.

And for anybody who cannot see this gorgeous woman in front of me, go get the serums and the potions and all of the things you're gonna want it. So thank you so much for coming on in, you guys. I linked everything below in the show notes, so everything that we chatted about her book everything she just talked about. You can go check it out there. Make sure you find her, follow her, and until next time, earn your happy.

Bye, everybody. Everyone.